the future
by Trf4n
Summary: Set in the 1980's brought back as demanded
1. Chapter 1

Back on demand

Aisling was meeting her mum at the royal after evening surgery she didn't normally meet at the hospital but today was different they were going to the library in town. So as it was a nice sunny day she decided to do her revision on the beach. So deep was her concentration that the time had flown by a quick glance at her watch told her she was going to be late. Quickly putting on her shoes and running up the slope trying to stuff her books in the bag, she ran all the way to the royal.

Dr Weatherill had just finished with her last patient when Aisling walked through the door. Jill smiled at the flushed faced young girl and placed the back of her hand on her forehead asking if she was alright.

"Yeah I'm fine just got carried away and forgot the time so had to run all the way here" replied Aisling.

"Well I'll be ready in a minute I've just got some notes to write up" said Jill

They make their way to the office and Jill proceeds to scribble her notes down. They had only been in there a couple of minutes when there's a knock at the door Lizzie enters "sorry doctor there's an emergency and I can't find any of the others I've put their lights up I know your busy"

"No problem Lizzie" She said while getting up and moving swiftly to the door turning to speak to Aisling "sorry, I'll be as quick as possible"

Aisling replies "That's ok I've got some work to be getting on with"

With that Jill turns and walks to the emergency room where some lad had fallen off his bmx bike she orders x-rays and cleans up the cuts and grazes he lucky it's not worse as he wasn't wearing a crash helmet.

Meanwhile Aisling still sat in the office has got her books out and is underlining and writing notes in the boarders when she hears footsteps coming along the corridor which stops outside its sister Brigid.

"Why did no-one tell me you were here" questioned the sister

"Well we were supposed to be gone by now only mums dealing with an emergency" replied Aisling. Sister Brigid was one of the reasons she hardly came to the royal she had always treated her differently from the other Ormerod children. She had been tougher yet she had also wrapped her in cotton wall and Aisling despised her for that. She could tell she was thinking something now the way sister kept on glancing at the paperwork and then at her. Aisling just wanted to get out of there wishing her mum would materialise out of no-where and everything would be alright.

"So what are you doing here then" asked sister

"Well I'm trying to revise" snapped Aisling before adding "and when mums finished were supposed to be going to the library in town" she turned back to her books and was pretending to read hoping she would get the hint. Well anyone else would but sister Brigid walked in and sat down you can tell she didn't trust her. A couple of times Sister tried to make conversations only for Aisling to either grunt or not reply at all. Aisling was finding it harder and harder to concentrate for the past half an hour sister had been rambling on about her day and telling stories about Moira, she made to get up saying she needed a drink. With that she walked out the door went to reception and walked outside.

Jill had got the results of the x-ray the young lad had broken his arm as expected she informed the nurse who proceeded to plaster it and then he was allowed on his way with strict instructions to return if he felt dizzy or sick. Walking back down the corridor towards her office reaching the door she was shocked to find sister Brigid sat in her chair and no sign of Aisling. Sister Brigid just smiled and said "she's gone to get a drink she'll be back in a mo"

"Yes well thank you that will be all sister" said Jill "if I can get back to my paperwork then we will be off and see you tomorrow."

"Oh yes sorry doctor see you tomorrow then"

Five minutes later and Jill had just finished her notes but there was still no sign of Aisling. She was starting to get worried, packing up her bags and Aisling's things she decided to put them in the car and then look for her she was probably talking to one of the nurses.

Going out to her mini she noticed the familiar figure sitting on the wall she made her way over "are you ok sweetheart" she said softly but still making her jump.

"Yeah sorry she just keeps going on and doesn't know when to leave alone" replies Aisling

"Well are you ready" asks Jill

"Yeah but can we just go home" inquired Aisling

"Are you sure we can still get there in time" responds Jill

"Yeah I'm not in the mood I'd rather just go home I'll get the bus in tomorrow"

The journey home was a quite one a couple of times Jill had tried to ask her daughter what had gone on but she knew not to push her she'd speak when she was ready.

They got through the front door put their bags and shoes where they normally go Aisling went straight upstairs and Jill walked through to the kitchen where Gordon was preparing dinner.

"Hello love, your early wasn't expecting you for another hour" smiled Gordon

"We didn't even get there, long story tell you later" replied Jill

"Where's Ash" Gordon asked

"Upstairs she's not talking sister Brigid found her in my office while I was attending a emergency, I came back only sister was in my room, I found Ash outside upset and she wanted to come home so here we are" stated Jill.

Twenty minutes later and dinner was on the table Gordon shouted up to Aisling and Jill got the drinks ready. Aisling slowly made her way downstairs. Dinner always seemed quite these days now there was only the three of them.

"Did you have a good day" Gordon asked his daughter

"Yeah it was ok" replied Aisling

Gordon could tell she didn't want to say anything else about what had happened so didn't push the subject any more

"Have you got much homework to do" Inquired Jill

Aisling looked up she'd not made eye contact with them since Jill had found her outside

"No I've done it all. Why?" Said Aisling

Jill and Gordon looked at each other they could tell she'd been crying even though she had washed her face. "Well we thought we could play a game or watch a movie if you wanted to" Said Jill

"o.k., can we play trivial pursuit please" Aisling pleaded

"Of course you go and set it up while we wash these plates" smiled Gordon

Aisling made her way to the front room and proceeded to set up the board game while the adults talked about her while washing up.

Ten minutes later and they made their way into the front room with cups of tea in hand. Jill handed Aisling a cup and sat down next to her with Gordon the other side. They played the game for sometime every now and again laughter could be heard mostly Jill and Aisling laughing at Gordon's answers needless to say Gordon came last with Jill winning. As they were packing away Gordon was complaining that they were cheating giving him the harder questions. It was now ten o'clock Jill got up "right time for bed I think"

Aisling got up kissed her mum and dad goodnight "love you" she said

"Love you to sweetheart" both Gordon and Jill replied. They looked worryingly at each other what, had sister Brigid said.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been one of those days both it had started with an early morning call which had resulted in Gordon leaving early, Jill had followed after dropping Aisling off, it had carried on during the day with hardly a minute to catch their breath there had been a bad accident which meant they were only leaving now. Jill and Gordon were looking forward to just getting home and being able to relax in front of the television with a drink. Unknown to them their day was only going to get worse.

They both pulled into the drive unusually for this time of night the house was all in darkness normally even if the children were in bed they would put the porch light on. They hurriedly got out of their cars forgetting to get their bags, Jill fumbled with her keys trying to find the lock with what seemed like forever but was only a few seconds. Gordon switched on the lights her bag was here so where was she. Gordon started looking downstairs while Jill went up to the bedrooms. Gordon had just made it to the kitchen when he heard his wife scream out his name, running up the stairs two at a time he reached the doorway of his daughter's bedroom. Jill turned around "she's gone, Gordon she's gone" she sobbed.

"What" a shocked Gordon replied

"She's gone" snapped Jill whilst shoving a note in his hands "she left this and some of her clothes are gone too." She continued "It's all my fault"

"No it's not" soothed Gordon whilst moving closer to give his wife a hug.

"Well she was fine until yesterday, if I hadn't of left her in my office alone none of this would have happened."

"We have to look for her I can't lose her Gordon"

"We won't I promise" replied Gordon

For the next half an hour they phoned friends and family to see if anyone knew anything they had nothing to go on sister Brigid had been busy and was going to phone them back maybe she could shine some light on their situation. Katie had come up with a few ideas about where they had been happy as kids. "Gordon" Jill said suddenly and before waiting for a reply she continued "I can't just wait here I'm going to drive around those places Katie was on about."

"That's a good idea I'll come with you" replied Gordon

"But what if sister Brigid calls or Aisling comes back it would be better if someone was here" said Jill

There was a knock at the door which made them both jump they hadn't been expecting anyone Gordon made his way to the door ready to send whoever it was away. He was shocked to see Lizzie standing there. "Come in, come in" he said they headed to the front room where Jill was.

"I've come to see if there's anything I can do" said Lizzie

"Well thank you yes, yes there is can you stay here and wait for sister Brigid to call" said Jill

"How's she going to do that she's out looking with some of the other nurses" questioned Lizzie

"What she was supposed to phone" Gordon was angry now

"Yes I know doctor but she had an idea where she would be" replied Lizzie

"Well we wouldn't be in this mess if it wasn't for her" retorted Gordon to which Jill gave him a careful what you're saying look and asked "well if you could stay here just in case it would be helpful Lizzie"

"Yes no problem doctor, I hope you find her"

"So do I we will keep in touch by phoning every hour for updates" replied Jill whilst walking out the door and rummaging around in the cupboard looking for a blanket it was getting cold out there.

They had been driving around for a couple of hours now and Gordon could tell Jill was getting more and more worried her hands were clasped in tight fists on her lap but whatever he said or did was wrong so they had been driving in silence for most of it. They were near the railway station so Gordon pulled in and made his way towards the phone box it was about time to check in with Lizzie, Jill got out the car as well she needed to stretch her legs. Little did they know that Aisling was on the other side of the tracks in a little cafe staring blankly into a now cold cup of tea trying not to think of all the people she was hurting by leaving. She had bought her ticket earlier that day, the train was going to leave shortly finishing her cup of tea and putting on her coat she made her way to the door. A shiver ran down her spine as she made her way out onto the street she turned towards the railway station only to see Sister Brigid walking towards her quickly turning around hoping she hadn't seen her. It was too late sister Brigid was now walking faster and calling her name.

Aisling started to run, sister Brigid gave chase calling her name as she followed. Sister Brigid thought to herself that's strange maybe she hasn't heard me so she called louder to which Aisling turned around at the same time as running straight out into the road.


	3. Chapter 3

Meanwhile Jill and Gordon were making their way back to the car after hearing there was still no news. They had one more place to try before they ran out of ideas but that was all the way across town. They heard the screeching of brakes not that far away. Jill had a bad feeling about it so they decided to go in that direction instead.

They got to the scene of the accident about ten minutes later as it was on the other side of the railway and the traffic was starting to build up. Gordon pulled in behind the ambulance the driver seemed to be fine a little shaken and bruised he was talking to the police along with sister Brigid.

Jill made her way cautiously toward the casualty and as realisation caught her that it was their daughter her legs gave way luckily Gordon was there to catch her. One of the ambulance men realising the doctors were there but not knowing that was their daughter asked for their help. Jill pulled herself together and knelt beside her smoothing her hair away from her eyes and talking gently to her telling everything was alright. They quickly checked her over to get her to hospital as quickly as possible. Jill went in the ambulance with her while Gordon followed in his car. Sister Brigid was still talking to the police so she would have to make her own way Gordon didn't want to leave his wife or daughter alone for any longer than needed. They reached the Royal about fifteen minutes later they had to go there Aisling wasn't stable enough for a longer journey. Gordon pulled up as they were wheeling Aisling through to casualty. The nurse on duty called the on call surgery staff but Jill and Gordon started without them.

They worked seamlessly together each knowing what the other was doing. They had taken x-rays; crossed matched bloods all the while the nurses were getting the operating room ready. They were all prepped and ready to go. The nurse came in notifying the on call surgeon was going to be at least another two hours he was attending another accident at Ashfordly.

Jill turned to Gordon "She can't wait that long, I'm going to do it"

Gordon replied "you can't"

"You know as well as me that if we just sit here she's going to bleed to death, I can't...I won't let that happen" stuttered Jill trying to hold back the tears.

"Right well we better get scrubbed in then Dr Weatherill" replied Gordon

They walked into the theatre telling the staff what to expect

"Right were up against a ruptured spleen, broken leg and possibly some spinal injuries" stated Gordon to the team

After a long four hours in surgery they had managed to stop the bleeding and put a cast on the leg. They had to wait and see what the specialist made about the back x-rays.

Aisling was in a side ward Jill was sat in the chair. Gordon had gone to call the other children to let them know what was happening. He walked to the side room "any change" he asked while handing Jill a cup of tea. "No, did you get hold of everyone" asked Jill

"Yes their all getting the first trains up here I said I'll pick them up but they said their meet us here" replied Gordon before adding "you look tired why don't you go rest for awhile I'll stay here and let you know of any change"

"No I need to stay here that's how all this started in the first place because I left her remember" said Jill

"It's not your fault and I'll be here, please go and rest" he pleaded

To which Jill replied "I can't leave, I'll rest here" whilst getting comfy in her chair and taking their daughters hand. Gordon knew he wasn't going to get anywhere so pulled his chair next to his wife taking hold of her free hand.


	4. Chapter 4

It was the following morning both Gordon and Jill had fallen asleep in the early hours of the morning they only woke when there was a knock at the door "come in" Jill said sleepily in walked Katie "Sorry did I wake you, is there any change"

"That's alright sweetheart, no there's no change" Jill replied.

Gordon made to get up so Katie could sit down "That's alright dad I can stand" said Katie to which Gordon replied "No you sit I'm a little stiff to tell the truth I could do with a stretch. I'll go and make us some drinks. Is that your bag?"

"Yes, I didn't know how long so I bought a few things" Replied Katie

"I'll put it in the car" stated Gordon while walking out the door. Katie sat beside Jill and placed her head on Jill's shoulder like she use to when she wanted to feel closer to her. Jill responded by putting her arm around and placing a kiss on her forehead. "Why did she go" asked Katie

"We don't know yet for sure, she hasn't regain consciousness, it's got something to do with sister Brigid" there was a brief pause before she added "It's my fault if I hadn't of left her" tears were welling up in her eyes as she said this Katie didn't like it when Jill cried none of the children did.

"It's not your fault" replied Katie then quickly added "She knows we all love her very much" then seeing how much Jill was worried she said "Ash will be alright won't she"

"Of course she will she's an Ormerod" Replied Gordon from the doorway with a tray of tea. Katie made to get up "You stay there I'm going to go home now that your here I have to get some things do you want anything darling" he asked to which Jill responded "A change of clothes would be nice"

"O.k. won't be long" he made his way to the door "Oh Gordon we have to make sure the kids beds are made up, please don't be long" Jill said over her shoulder "Yes I'll be as quick as possible" replied Gordon.

Jill and Katie sat in silenced for a while staring at their drinks. Katie didn't know what to say she didn't want to upset Jill any more than she was so she said "Jill do you remember the time we were on holiday and we were at the beach Tom and I had gone for a swim and Ash had followed us"

"Yes I remember" replied Jill "That was the year she'd just started walking your dad was supposed to be building sandcastles with Jonathon and Ash and I was watching you two. I had to run after you as she was following you in to the sea"

"Yeah dad never lived that one down all holiday" replied Katie

"No he didn't" Said Jill then added "She always wanted to be like her big sister"

"What about the time she wanted to be like you" retorted Katie

"What the time she wanted to be a doctor or when she wanted to come to the hospital ball"

"The hospital ball" replied Katie giggling just remembering it. At that moment Gordon walked in they hadn't noticed that two hours had already passed. "Look who I found loitering in the hallway" Gordon said and with that playfully pulled both his sons in. "Tom, Jonathon" gasped Jill

Gordon was just thinking how Jill looked a little bit calmer he was about to ask what they were giggling at but as always Katie was quick to fill them in

"We were just remembering when Ash followed Tom and I in to the sea on holiday and then we remembered when she got all dressed up in her party frock and had some of mums makeup on and her shoes"

"Because she was a big girl and wanted to go to the hospital ball" Gordon, Tom and Jonathon all butted in, in unison. Then all five of them were laughing.

They carried on for the rest of the day relieving memories. It was now half eight at night Jill let out a yawn and after some persuasion was going to go home for a proper nights rest, so was Gordon. She had kissed them all goodnight twice "Any problems call us" she said while being pushed out the door

"For the third time yes mum, now go or your be no good when she does wake up" Replied Jonathon

"Well if you're sure" said Jill

"They're be fine" Gordon said while taking her arm and walking to the car

Back at home and Jill went straight upstairs, while Gordon went and sat in the living room with a glass of scotch. Half an hour later Gordon made his way upstairs he got to their bedroom to find it empty so was their bathroom "Jill" he said slightly panicked walking back along the hallway to find Jill sat on their daughters bed silently sobbing and hugging the teddy bear they had got her for her first Christmas .

He sat down beside her she leaned her head on his shoulder they stayed like that for another hour before they went to bed. Gordon knew she blamed herself and no matter what he said he could not get her to forgive herself.

They fell asleep rather quickly it wasn't surprising really they had only had a couple of hours at the most in the last couple of days. They both woke early but both felt wide awake and refreshed they made their way downstairs as quickly as possible had a quick breakfast then Jill went about making lunch for the others she knew all too well the mess she would come into otherwise. Then they were out the door the sooner they got there the better as there would be less traffic when Gordon bought the kids back.

Fifteen minutes later they arrived at the hospital walking up to the room they heard laughing.

Inside they were talking about how they had fooled their parents and got away with it or so they had thought only to be found out or caught as soon as the door opened the laughing stopped "Good morning" Jill and Gordon said together "Morning" replied the Ormerod children. Jill moved towards the chart at the end of the bed whilst saying "I hope you're not giving your sister ideas" she then winked at them.

"Right time to get going" said Gordon "Let's give your mum some time alone"


	5. Chapter 5

It had been five days since the accident the other Ormerod children had been persuaded to go back as they all had important exams coming up and besides they would be back in two or three weeks for the holidays. Gordon had gone back to work as it was busy which meant the locum only had Jill's patients to deal with. He still spent every spare minute with his wife at their daughter's bedside. Today was even busier than normal there was a multiple car pileup on the main road in. Gordon and the locum had gone to the scene of the accident which left the new doctor on his own who was already totally swamped and unable to cope.

Jill was sat holding Ash's hand while reading a medical journal when there was a knock at the door "Come in" said Jill while looking up from the paper

"Sorry doctor we need your help there's been a bad accident on the main road and more causalities than we can deal with" said Lizzie in her usual chirpy voice

"I'll be right there" replied Jill while folding the corner of the journal so she knew where she was

"Sister Brigid said she would come and sit with Ash if you like" said Lizzie

"No. That won't be necessary we'll need sister on the ward" replied Jill

"O.k., she just thought you wouldn't want to leave her on her own"

"No I don't Lizzie" replied Jill

"How about I call Matron ask if she will come and sit with her she was popping in to look over the paperwork anyway" Said Lizzie thoughtfully

"That's a good idea thanks Lizzie" replied Jill with a smile on her face that had put her mind at rest matron was like one of the family and she knew Ash trusted her.

Matron still popped in from time to time as she was still a board member and they had given her one of the nurses flats for all the years service she had given the hospital. Jill and Lizzie made to go out the room and matron was stood there "Did someone say my name" she queried

"Yes matron" replied Jill then added "I'm needed and we wondered if you wouldn't mind sitting with Ash for me"

"No problem take as long as you need" replied matron

"Thank you" was all Jill had time to reply before the first stream of patients came through the door both her and Lizzie jumped into action. Matron turned with a smile and sat down.

It was an hour before matron saw anyone again it was Lizzie bringing a cup of tea it was the first time there had been a bit of a break. Matron sat there for about another three hours telling stories about the hospital and how it had changed over the years and some of the things the staff had got up to. She spoke fondly about the Ormerod family she had always thought of them as family and was very proud of them all. She was always touched when they invited her around for dinner or on family occasions.

Sister Brigid bust through the door "Oh sorry matron I didn't realise anyone was in here" she said shocked

"That's alright Jill asked me to sit here come in" replied matron

"No that's alright I was just going to check everything while I had five minutes" replied sister then added "I don't think Jill will be much longer anyway Gordon's just coming in with the last patient now"

"O.k. thank you sister" replied matron.

Sister Brigid was right Jill walked through the door forty five minutes later looking exhausted she sat in the chair next to matron

"Why don't you get some rest dear I'll stay a little longer" asked matron

"No I've asked too much already" replied Jill sleepily

"Nonsense" replied matron

"Well if you're sure a few minutes wouldn't hurt" replied Jill who fell asleep to wake half an hour later feeling refreshed.

"That's better" said matron "now you stay here and I'll get us a nice cup of tea and we can have that little chat" and with that she was out the door.


	6. Chapter 6

Jill took her daughters hand only this time it was different her daughters hand squeezed back "Ash, sweetheart" Jill said slightly shocked she stood up and bent over her bed and with her free hand brushing her hair away from her face.

Matron came in with a tray of drinks followed by Gordon who had just finished with the last patient and was hoping for five minutes peace. Jill turned around towards the door with a smile and tears streaming down her face "She squeezed my hand, she squeezed my hand" she said joyfully

"That's great" replied Gordon and Matron. Matron then added "I'll give you some space"

"No stay, please" pleaded Jill

"Well if you're sure" replied matron

"Yes" said Jill a little too quickly

Gordon then pulled up the spare chair and they sat with their drinks talking and waiting they didn't have to wait long before Ash started to wake up.

Aisling started to wake up slowly confused staring at the ceiling not knowing where she was her back hurt and her leg felt heavy it was only when the familiar voice of her mum letting her know she was in the royal that she started to relax a little. Then panic set in as she realised how much trouble she would be.

It was Gordon who spoke first "So what do you think you were doing young lady" Aisling didn't reply she didn't know how to put it without hurting them

"Well were waiting, we've got all day" said Gordon it wasn't like him to be like this he just couldn't understand why she had done this and wanted her to know how stupid she had been.

Jill gave Gordon a look which told him to back off she had only just woken up after all. "Well if we're not going to get anywhere I'm going to let everyone know she's woken up, I'll find sister Brigid as well" said Gordon they all saw the look of horror on Aisling's face as he mentioned her name. Gordon and Jill quickly glanced at each other both worried then Gordon made to go out

"I'm so sorry" sobbed Aisling Gordon turned around gave a smile and walked out it was a while before Jill and Matron could calm her down. Half an hour after Gordon had left he returned "I'm sorry Ash, it's just you scared us we just want to help" apologised Gordon

"Did you get hold of them" inquired Jill

"Yes their all glad you're awake and they're be down soon" replied Gordon.

Then before anything else could be said Aisling blurted the whole situation out about how it had all started when sister Brigid had seen her the day before talking to a couple of Jonathon's friends and then the day in the office when she had started ranting on that she was just like her mum and that if she carried on that why she would end up the same way pregnant with a baby she doesn't want with a man who's a no good lying father and that none of this would of happened if she was living with her and how she was going to take her away for the whole of the summer holidays.

"I thought I had disappointed you and you didn't want me so I thought I would save you the bother and leave earlier, so I bought my ticket then sat in the all night cafe near the station when it was time to leave I saw sister Brigid so I ran the other way she followed shouting and that's all I remember" She said with tears streaming down her face.

The adults just sat shocked no-one had expected this "I'll give you some space, I'll come and see you tomorrow" said matron "And get some rest" she added with a smile.

Jill followed her out and shut the door behind them "Thank-you matron for everything"

"I'm just glad I could help now go back in she needs her mum and remember if you need anything you know where I am" replied matron but before Jill could go back inside sister Brigid came running around the corner

"Is it true she's awake" she asked

"Yes" replied Jill then matron stepped in "she's very tired and needs to speak to her mum and dad, I'm sure you can see her tomorrow" she said while taking sisters arm

"Why didn't anyone say I haven't seen her since she's been here" replied sister Brigid

"Well she needs her rest and one more day won't hurt" said matron while leading sister Brigid back the way she had come. Matron turned her head to see Jill mouthed thank-you then take a deep breath before entering the room.

Gordon had managed to calm an exhausted Aisling down who had just dozed off.

"It's been a long day" said Jill

"Yes" replied Gordon "Let's go home she won't be awake until morning" he added they both kissed their daughter goodnight.

Back at home they were both sat on the sofa with a glass of wine trying to make sense of everything that had been said but it only left them with more questions.


	7. Chapter 7

The following day as they made their way as usual separately to the hospital Gordon got his notes from Lizzie and Jill went straight through the locum was still covering for her. They both went into their daughters room she was awake and eating breakfast "Morning mum, dad" she said

"Morning" they both replied "How are you this morning" Jill asked while looking at her chart

"I'm o.k. a little stiff" Aisling replied

"Any pain" asked Gordon who was already sitting down

"A little, when can I go home" asked Ash

"Well we have to see" replied Gordon. Aisling looked worried maybe sister Brigid was right maybe they didn't want her

Jill must of read her mind because she added "Ash sweetheart look at me" Ash looked her mum in the eyes "It's not that we don't want you home it's that you've done some damage to your back that's why you've got that brace on until the specialist can take a look and tell us what to do it's safer for you if you stay here" said Jill,

Gordon added "We all love you so much and don't want anything bad to happen to you"

There was a knock at the door it was Lizzie "Your first patients here doctor"

"O.k. thank-you Lizzie" replied Gordon

"Hello Ash nice to see you awake I've got some magazines at reception for you I'll bring them in next time I'm going by I know how boring these places can be" Said Lizzie

"Thanks" replied Aisling and with that Lizzie left

"Well I'll leave you two to it then" said Gordon shutting the door behind him Jill went and sat down "You know you can tell me anything" said Jill

"Yes mum, I know I'm so sorry, I never meant to hurt any of you" tears were already starting to form she wasn't ready to talk yet "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" she was crying now Jill moved to give her daughter a cuddle calming her down and then she fell silent and the tears slowed she had fallen asleep Jill stayed like that for a few more minutes then gently laid her down and pulled the covers up her face was still all blotchy from crying.

Jill made herself comfy and got about to read the medical journal from the other day. It was about half past ten when matron gently knocked on the door and peered in. Jill was pleased to see her she needed to talk and matron was the perfect person it was surprising really at one time she would of done anything not to ask for matrons help but they had grown close over the years.

What they didn't know was that Aisling had woken up shortly after matron had arrived she had pretended to be asleep she wasn't ready to talk but now she felt even worse. She now knew her mum blamed herself and had even heard her crying. She knew they needed to understand but the thing was how could they understand when even she didn't she didn't know how to put it. She knew she had lost their trust and maybe even their love. She just wanted to curl up in a ball and die.

Aisling was growing restless her leg was beginning to ache so she moved slightly. Jill and matron stopped talking they thought she was waking up. Matron told Jill to go and freshen up as she didn't want Ash to see her like this she kissed Ash on the forehead and told her she would be back shortly.

Matron was called out there was a telephone call. Aisling was now on her own she opened her eyes and stretched she reached for a piece of paper and pen and tried to write down her feelings and reasons for running trying to make sense of it all she knew this was the only way to make it better.

Sister Brigid walked in to check her temperature and pulse she wasn't expecting her to be on her own let alone awake "You stupid, stupid, selfish little girl what do you think you were playing at" She shouted. One of the nurses in the corridor heard her shouting and ran to fetch either doctor.

Aisling managed to pull herself out of bed and hobbled towards the door sister Brigid tried to block her way but Aisling managed to push her out of the way and get past.

Meanwhile the nurse had found both Jill and Gordon discussing a patient at reception they ran towards their daughter's room only to find her hobbling towards them. Jill caught her just in time before she collapsed into a heap on the floor

"It's alright sweetheart" said Jill soothingly whilst Gordon helped them get up

"Let's get you back to bed young lady" said Gordon

Jill and Gordon looked at each other they needed to talk to sister Brigid before anymore damage was done. Aisling was exhausted but she needed to talk to them

"It's all my fault, I'm so sorry" said Aisling

"Don't talk, just rest we'll talk later" said Jill

"Mum" replied Ash

"Yes sweetheart" replied Jill

"It's not your fault, I was confused" said Ash sleepily

"Sshh just sleep" said Jill while smoothing her hair

"We'll talk later" said Gordon

"Love you" said Ash

"We love you to" replied Jill and Gordon.

"I'll be back at lunchtime" said Gordon

"Maybe we could go outside it will be more private" replied Jill

"Good idea, I'll see if I can get a wheelchair" said Gordon.


	8. Chapter 8

An hour later and Gordon returned as promised with a wheelchair Aisling had woken up a few minutes beforehand "What's that for" she inquired

"We thought we would have lunch outside if you're up to it" replied Gordon. Aisling looked at both parents and nodded excitingly.

They made their way into the garden it was quiet even though it was a lovely day. They sat in silence having their lunch for a while. Aisling hadn't touched a thing she was just picking at a sandwich Jill noticed this and asked "Are you alright, you've hardly eaten a thing"

"Yeah I'm fine" replied Ash

"Are you in pain we can go back inside if you want" ask Gordon

"A little bit but I want to stay" replied Ash.

Jill and Gordon glanced at each other worried she was over doing it "Well let us know when you've had enough" said Jill a little concerned.

All of a sudden Aisling blurted out "Don't be nice I don't deserve it, it's all my fault so don't blame yourself mum"

Jill and Gordon moved towards their daughter each taking a hand they knew she was ready to talk they hadn't been expecting it yet "I was confused after what sister Brigid said, I felt lost, like I wasn't me anymore it's silly I know that now" Ash paused to take a drink

"I thought if I saw my dad got to know him for myself it might become clearer... and I thought you didn't want me around... I thought leaving would be best for everyone as I would let you down or disappoint you sooner or later so I thought if I left it would save you all the pain and grief. I never meant to hurt you I'm so sorry can you ever forgive me" tears were streaming down her face Jill's free hand was wiping away tears

"We will always love you no matter what" said Jill moving her daughters head so they were looking eye to eye "You understand we will always love you, you can never disappoint us" she added

"You know you can always come and talk to us about anything" added Gordon

Aisling took a deep breath then said "Yes, I'm so sorry" she knew sorry was never going to be enough no matter how many times she said it, she realised she had hurt her mum and dad more than she had thought and she was still hurting them now. "

Can we go back now" Ash asked

"Of course we can" replied Gordon They went back to the room and got Ash back into bed "Nothing's ever going to be the same again is it" asked Ash

"It will but it will take time" replied Jill

"Now get some rest me and your dad need to chat, we'll be in his office if you need us" she added "O.k. thanks... mum, dad I am really sorry" said Ash

"We know, now get some rest, I'll be back later to check on you" said Jill


	9. Chapter 9

Today was Jill's first day back at work following Aisling's accident Jill and Gordon had gone in early to discuss a patient of Jill's who was coming in today when the phone rang it was the orthopaedic surgeon from Ashfordly general. They both went through to Gordon's office to take the call. The surgeon went on to say that it was in her best interest to have the operation. He then went on to say exactly what would happen, the risks approximately how long it would take and how long it would take to recover. He then added that they would do the operation at the Royal first thing tomorrow morning. After he had finished Jill and Gordon sat there for a while a little shocked and worried for their little girl how were they going to tell her would it be better coming from another doctor or from them before they could make a decision there was a knock at the door

"Come in" said Gordon

"Sorry doctors it's just you're first patients are here" replied Lizzie

"No problem, we'll talk later Jill" said Gordon.

Jill then gave Gordon a peck on the cheek and followed Lizzie out into reception. Jill had finished her list of patients early

"Lizzie do you know if matrons back yet" ask Jill

"I think she got back half an hour ago, she went out into the garden" replied Lizzie

"Thanks" said Jill who went off in search of matron. She found her sitting on a bench looking out to sea

"Hello matron" said Jill

"Oh hello Jill" replied matron

"Do you mind if I join you" asked Jill

"No not at all" said matron

"Is everything alright" asked Jill

"Don't worry about me, you've got enough going on" replied matron

"Well to tell the truth I rather think about something else" said Jill.

So for awhile matron talked about the telephone call she had received and why she had left but then as always she managed to bring the subject back to Jill she knew her all too well that she needed to talk. Jill had recently found it easier to talk to matron than her own mother. Matron was more understanding especially when it came to the children.

Matron was now up to date with everything that had happened "I'll talk to sister Brigid. It will be better coming from me, we all know she can be a bit over protective and it wouldn't do Aisling any good if you're all fighting over this" said matron as always making perfect sense

"And as for Aisling... I think it would be best coming from you and Gordon she trusts you both so she knows whatever you tell her it's in her best interest." Added matron

"Yes you're right thank you" replied Jill

"Well it's no good sitting here we better get back before someone misses you" smiled matron.

They walked back to the hospital "Ahh there you are" said Gordon as they walked through the door "We've been having a little chat" replied matron

"Everything alright" ask Gordon worried

"Yes everything is fine, now I'm going to find sister Brigid, you go and talk to Ash" said matron. Gordon looked at Jill as matron walked passed and up the corridor

"I'll explain on the way" said Jill leading the way. She had just finished explaining when they reached the door

"Well that makes sense" said Gordon

"What would we do without matron to reason with us" replied Jill.

They walked into the room to find the bed empty. Panic set in Jill looked at Gordon then their eyes were drawn to a movement in the corner of the room. Aisling was writing down notes she never had been good at just sitting doing nothing.

Jill and Gordon both gave a sigh of relief

"What do you think you're doing" said Jill sternly which made Aisling jump she looked up from her work to see both of her worried parents faces

"Revising there's not enough room on the bed" then she added "I will be out of here in time for exams? Won't I"

"Well we'll have to wait and see come and sit over here we've got something we need to talk about" said Gordon

"What's wrong what have I done" asked Aisling

"You've done nothing wrong we just need to chat" replied Jill

"What...what is it" asked Ash

"Well you know we said you had hurt your back" replied Gordon

"Yes" said Ash

"Well we've talked to the specialist this morning and they say the best thing is to have an operation" stated Gordon

"No. No I won't" replied Ash.

Jill moved into cuddle and comfit her but she moved away "Ash, sweetheart it really is the best option for you" replied Jill soothingly

"No I don't want it" replied Ash

"If you don't have it you could get worse and be in a lot more pain" replied Gordon

"But what about my exams I won't be out in time if you do the operation will I?" said Ash

"No you won't" replied Gordon

"What if I have it done after exams then" replied Ash she was trying to reason with her parents even though she knew they were right deep down.

"Ash you need this straight away, it's booked for tomorrow, you will only get worse otherwise" said Gordon.

This time Jill moved into cuddle and Ash went straight into her open arms and cried "It's for the best I'll see what I can do about you're exams. I'm not promising anything but I'll see if you can do them here" Said Jill

"You would do that for me" questioned Ash

"I would do anything for you we both would" replied Jill. Then Gordon explained everything about the operation Ash needed to know

"Will you be there as well" Ash asked after they had made sure she had understood everything else "No but we'll be here when you wake up" replied Jill

"Right I've got to finish my ward rounds" stated Gordon

"O.k. I'll wait here for you" replied Jill

"Can you test me on science" questioned Ash as Gordon left the room

"For a little while then you have to get some rest" said Jill

"Until dad gets back then please mum please" pleaded Ash

"O.k. until you're dad gets back now where's the book" said Jill

"Thanks mum" replied Ash while picking the book off the floor and passing it to Jill.

A little while later and Gordon arrived back at Aisling's room "I'm sorry visiting time is over, the patient needs her rest" He joked

"Dad just a little while longer please" said Ash

"No we said until you're dad came back" said Jill closing the book

"We can do more tomorrow night" Said Gordon

"Now goodnight" said Jill tucking her in and kissing her on the forehead

"Night mum and thanks, I love you" said Ash

"Love you too" replied Jill.

Gordon then done the same "Goodnight sleep tight" he said

"Night dad love you" replied Ash

"Love you too" said Gordon

"Now lights out" said Jill taking the books away she knew all too well that as soon as they left Aisling would be out of bed and reading again otherwise.


	10. Chapter 10

The day of the operation Jill and Gordon had gone in early neither of them had slept very well. They had been talking about what Ash had said in the garden and how she seemed a bit happier it had helped them to understand a bit more and Jill didn't seem to blame herself as much. They arrived at the Royal early Gordon went straight to Ash were as Jill went to her office to deal with the post and drop off her coat and bag, she then went to check everything was set up right for the operation which would be happening in less than half an hour. She then went to her daughter's room.

Gordon was trying to keep Ash calm the anaesthetists had just been in to give Ash her pre-meds and she was worried she wouldn't see her mum. Ash calmed down straight away the second she saw Jill walk through the door

"Good morning, everything alright" asked Jill

"It is now, where have you been" asked Gordon

"Just checking everything was ready" replied Jill.

This was her way of dealing with things trying to keep busy to keep her mind off things and make sure every possibility was covered should the worst happen. While they were having the conversation Jill had moved over and was gently rubbing her thumb across the back of her hand keeping her calm. Ash was already starting to drop off when the porters came in to take her down to the operating theatre Jill and Gordon walking by her side even though she wouldn't have known.

They stood outside the doors looking in

"She'll be fine" said Gordon putting an arm around Jill

"I know, I just can't help but worry" replied Jill then a quick look at her watch confirmed her thoughts "We've got to get to morning surgery" she added.

Jill kept herself busy all morning it was only when Gordon knocked on the door that she realised it was lunchtime

"Inside or out" asked Gordon

"Outside, any news" Jill asked while finishing her notes and putting the lid on her fountain pen

"They said it's all going well and will be at least another few hours" replied Gordon.

They were sat outside when Lizzie came running over "Sorry doctors, I need one of you to make an emergency visit" she said slightly out of breath

"I'll go" said Jill getting up and following Lizzie who was giving her the address and patient notes as they entered the hospital Jill went straight to her office and grabbed her bag and coat and left again.

Gordon followed in after picking up the lunch remains which he put in his office then he went to start his ward rounds he done Jill's at the same time as he didn't know how long she would be on the visit. Gordon was just about finishing when he was interrupted by a nurse who had come to tell him Aisling was in recovery. He went to reception to phone Jill. Lizzie had just found the number under a pile of paperwork

"Here you are doctor" said Lizzie

"Thank you Lizzie" replied Gordon he was just entering the number when Jill walked through the door

"Jill" said Gordon surprised

"Yes Gordon" replied Jill

"Ash is in recovery" said Gordon

"Oh well I'll just dump this and I'll be there" said Jill moving towards her office

"I'll meet you in a minute I've just got to finish the ward round" replied Gordon

"Yes of course tell sister I'll do mine when you've finished" said Jill

"I thought to save time I'd do it with mine" said Gordon

"You shouldn't of but thank-you" replied Jill who then gave Gordon a peck on the cheek.

They parted ways at the recovery room Jill made her way to Ash's side she was still asleep. Jill sat down next to her and took her hand and waited. It wasn't long before she started to wake the nurse came along to take her pulse and blood pressure.

"Hello sweetheart" said Jill

"Hi mum" said Ash sleepily she fell asleep again as they wheeled her back to the side ward they met Gordon in the corridor

"How's she doing" asked Gordon

"Everything looks fine" replied Jill still holding Ash's hand walking along beside her.

"Good, good I'll be back in a minute" replied Gordon waving the notes so Jill knew he was going to file them and be straight back she nodded as they parted ways. Gordon was back in next to no-time Ash was still asleep. It was getting late Jill and Gordon decided to go home the nurses would phone if there was any problems.


	11. Chapter 11

The following day was a pretty quite one. It was mid-morning when Jill had a phone call from the school. Lunchtime Jill went and found Gordon then they made their way to Ash's room. Ash was sat up and reading when they walked in.

"Hello" said Gordon Ash winced she hadn't heard them come in and had jumped

"Hello" she smiled "is it that time already "she added as she glanced at the lunch box and flask in her dad's hand

"Yes and we've got some news" said Jill

"What is it can I go home" asked Ash excitedly

"No not for a few more days" replied Gordon

"Ohh" said Ash disappointed

"Are you going to let me tell you or are you going to keep guessing" laughed Jill

"No I'll listen" said Ash

"That's better I talked to your school today and they agreed you can do your exams here as long as we say you're fit enough" said Jill

"That's brilliant" replied Ash excited again

"Don't get to excited there are a few rules" added Jill

"What are they" asked Ash

"One either me or your dad have to be here plus a teacher, Two no talking during exam times, Three no one from school can come and visit until all exams are completed and finally you will be under normal exam conditions during the exam" said Jill

"Oh well thanks for trying" said Ash

"What do you mean" asked Gordon

"Well a teacher won't come here every day and you and mum can't give up that much time either" replied Ash

"So you want me to cancel then" said Jill

"You mean you would do this for me" asked Ash

"Of course we can we figured if it's in the afternoon one of us will be here and the other will do both ward rounds" said Gordon

"When do we start" Ash asked

"Not for a couple of days and it's science first" said Jill

"Right we've got to get back" said Gordon getting up

"Get some rest" said Jill

"I've got to revise" said Ash

"No you've got to rest will be back and help you revise for a couple of hours until then I'm taking the books" said Jill

"No please mum" pleaded Ash

"If you don't rest enough you won't be well enough and we won't let you take the exams" said Gordon

"O.k. I promise I'll rest just leave one book please" pleaded Ash

"No" said Gordon

"We're not arguing about this, that is the final answer" said Jill

"O.k. I'm sorry" said Ash. With that Jill and Gordon left the room taking all the books it was four hours until Ash saw her parents again

"How are you doing" asked Jill

"I'm o.k. just a little sore" replied Ash while Jill checked her chart with Gordon looking over her shoulder

"You can have some more pain relief" said Gordon

"No I'm alright for now, maybe later" replied Ash.

They got down to some revision they had decided to make it more fun by making it a competition but it turned out to be more like when they played trivial pursuit. Jill and Ash laughing at Gordon's answers

"Oh don't make me laugh it hurts" said Ash tears streaming down her face from where she had been laughing too hard and the pain.

Jill looked worried and asked "Where does it hurt and do you want so pain killers"

"Yes please, it just pulls everything" said Ash. While Jill checked the stitches to make sure none of them had pulled Gordon went off in search of Sister to get the medication.

The truth was it did hurt physically but also mentally last time they had laughed this much was the night before all this had happened and the thoughts were whirling around her head about what she had done and how she had hurt the people she cared for most in the world. Before she knew it tears were streaming down her face. Jill sat down next to her and gave her a cuddle

"Sshhh it's alright" Jill soothed

"I'm so ssssorry" sobbed Ash

"It's alright" smiled Jill trying to sooth Ash.

Gordon walked in and handed Ash the tablets "This will make it better"

To which Ash replied "No it won't" which shocked both Jill and Gordon.

Gordon then moved and sat the other side of Ash and put his arm around both of them Jill gave Gordon a worried look to which Gordon replied with a tense smile

"Why won't it" asked Gordon

"It's just this reminded me of the other night and I wish so much I could go back and change it and for a second it was almost like I could. It's stupid I know" said Ash

"It's not stupid at all" said Jill "To tell you the truth I was having the same thoughts" she added

"So was I" admitted Gordon, Ash smiled

"Thanks for understanding" said Ash not feeling so stupid now

"That's what we're here for" said Gordon

"Right that's enough for tonight, we'll see you in the morning good night" said Jill giving Ash a kiss on the forehead

"Oh no please stay" said Ash

"Yes goodnight sweetheart, sweet dreams" said Gordon whilst kissing Ash on the forehead and getting her to lie down. Then they both tucked her in

"Love you" said Ash

"Love you too" replied Jill and Gordon. Gordon picked up the books and followed Jill into the corridor.

"I'm really worried about her" said Jill

"I know but she'll be fine I promise" replied Gordon giving Jill a cuddle


	12. Chapter 12

The next couple of weeks went by without much of a problem Gordon and Jill took it in turns to sit with Ash during examinations normally doing their paperwork so after they could spend as much one on one time with Ash.

After all the exams were done Ash was given the all clear to return home. She was looking forward to be going home and the fact that her siblings were coming home for the holidays. Her leg was still in plaster and would be for at least another week but at least her friends could come and visit now.

Ash had packed her bag and had been ready to go since breakfast Jill and Gordon wouldn't be ready to take her home until the end of the day. They came and saw her at lunch time she was now on her own again sat on the bed looking at her watch every five minutes or so wishing the time away every time she heard footsteps she was hoping it was one of her parents who had found time to drop her home. She got one of her sketch pads and a pencil out hoping this would help kill time because even if it was as soon as possible it would still be a few hours but she knew all too well you could never be sure.

Ash was looking around the room for inspiration of what to draw when there was a knock at the door "come in" said Ash staring out the window

"I hear your going home today I'm going to miss are little chats" said Matron

"So will I and thanks for all your help" replied Ash

"That's what I'm here for any time" said Matron then added "To tell the truth I've rather enjoyed having something useful to do".

Matron and Ash talked for a few minutes then Matron said "I'll leave you to it" nodding at the sketch book

"No don't worry I was only trying to pass the time I don't even know what I was going to draw" replied Ash

"It's a nice day why don't you go outside" said Matron

"That's a brilliant idea why don't you come with me" said Ash

"If you're sure" matron replied

"Yes" said Ash with a big beam on her face "I'll just leave a note in case mum or dad come back" said Ash whilst quickly scribbling the note.

They made their way to the garden "So what's your favourite view" Ash asked matron

"I don't know I've never thought about it before" replied Matron then added "what's yours?"

"I've always like the front with the sea in the back ground" Ash said she then she flipped a couple of pages back in her sketch pad and showed matron the picture she had drawn of the royal

"That's brilliant" said matron

"Thanks" said Ash turning red she didn't think she was very good at drawing and as a result didn't show anyone her pictures.

"I think that's my favourite view I've never looked at it that way before" said matron "What else have you drawn?" questioned matron

"Not a lot the rest of them are just doodles" replied Ash "Do you want to have a look" asked Ash "Yes please" replied Matron.

Matron took the sketch pad and turned to the first page and made her way through to the last picture which wasn't finished of the Ormerod family and staff from the royal at a birthday party and next to it was the photo she was working from. Ash had explained the other pictures which were of buildings around town or shells she had found on the beach or flowers from the garden but when matron reached the last one she said nothing.

"And what's this then" asked Matron.

"That was Dads birthday about eight years ago it's not finished yet" replied Ash

"I can see that but everyone is pencilled in apart from you why" said Matron

"I don't know I hadn't got round to that bit yet" Ash tried. The truth was she wanted to see what it looked like without her.

"But you've pencilled your mum in only you're not stood in front of her with her arms around you why?" questioned matron.

Ash didn't have time to think of an answer this was why she didn't show anyone her pictures plus everything she did at the moment was being analysed. Luckily or unluckily for her neither of them had seen Jill walking up to them

"And what are you two up to then" said Jill

"Ash has just been showing me her wonderful pictures" said Matron

"Ohh can I have a look" Said Jill sitting down to join them

"If you want there only doodles and some are not finished" said Ash. She was worried now what would her mum think of the last picture but she couldn't say no because that would hurt her mums feelings and she'd hurt her enough already. Matron handed the Sketch pad to Jill, Ash was getting more and more nervous as Jill made her way through.

She got to the picture of the royal when Ash said "That's it the rest aren't finished yet" trying to take the book from Jill but it was too late Jill had turned the page and was staring at the picture "Mum, it's not finished you weren't meant to see it yet" said Ash

Jill got up and walked towards the hospital numb why did Ash keep doing this hurting her so. She could hear Ash screaming for her pleading for her to come back so she could explain but she kept on walking she needed Gordon. Gordon was making his way to the garden after walking into Ash's room and seeing the note he could hear Ash's screams and started to run when he saw Jill walking towards him crying he took her in his arms and they went and sat in the conservatory. Jill showed him the picture

"Where is she" said Jill through the tears

"Well it's not finished" said Gordon

"But everyone else is there" replied Jill they were silent for a while then Jill said "Everyone but her"

"Well not everyone" said Gordon he had been studying the picture very carefully

"What" said Jill

"Well where's sister Brigid" replied Gordon "And where's your arms" he added "I think she simply hasn't finished yet" said Gordon trying to console his wife

"I've over reacted haven't I" said Jill

"Well it's to be expected after what we've been through I would have come to the same conclusion if I hadn't had time to look" said Gordon

"Now let's get are little girl home" he said getting up and putting out a hand for Jill to hold he then wiped away the tears and gave a peck on the cheek they then made their way to the bench Ash had been sat on when Jill had left her but it was empty now.

"Gordon" said Jill worried.


	13. Chapter 13

Ash had gone back to the room and was pulling everything out of the neatly packed bag "Where is it... Where is it" she muttered.

"Ash what are you looking for" asked matron who was stood in the doorway.

"I've got to make her see" was Ash's reply which left matron none the wiser

"Make who see what" asked matron hoping for a better response

"I can't find it" said Ash "I 'm sure it was here this morning" she added tears were starting to form matron sat her down on the bed

"Ash look at me I can help you if you tell me what you're looking for" matron said calmly

"The other sketch pad" sobbed Ash

"Right" said matron who then went to the bag and started to look for it meanwhile Jill and Gordon had hurried into the hospital looking for Ash.

They knew matron wouldn't let her go; they arrived at the room which now looked like a bomb had gone off

"What's going on here" Said Gordon both he and Jill relieved that she was still here.

"I've lost something" said Ash then added "It will help explain things"

"What is it?" asked Jill

"A sketch pad" replied matron who was now folding clothes having emptied the bag

"Maybe it's caught up with the pile of books in my room" said Gordon "It's alright we're find it, it can't of gone far" he added.

Jill and Gordon went to look in his office while Ash cleaned up her mess and matron went off to make everyone a sweet cup of tea she thought everyone could do with it to calm their nerves, she knew she could. They all arrived back at the room about five minutes later

"Is this what you're looking for" asked Gordon

"Yes, thanks" smiled Ash

"Are you going to tell us what all this is about" said matron puzzled

"It was suppose to be a surprise for mum and dad" said Ash

"What was" asked Jill

"Here" said Ash passing over the sketch pad opened at a page

"I was going to give you this for Christmas I was going to make a collage of your favourite's pictures but I was going to draw them so I didn't cut up you're photos, the picture you saw wasn't finished but if you turn the page you will see one that is".

Jill turned the page

"It's brilliant" beamed Jill tears of joy in her eyes.

Jill had turned over to her favourite picture of the family it was the one she kept on her desk.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you" said Ash

"Come here" said Jill opening her arms

"It's a lovely idea, I'm sorry I jumped to the wrong conclusion" said Jill

"It's my fault, I'm sorry" said Ash

"I'm sure it will be amazing when it's finished" said Jill

"So do I" said Gordon

"There's no point you've seen it now" said Ash

"We've only seen some of it, we have no idea what else is going to be in it and we would love to see the final outcome wouldn't we Jill" said Gordon

"Yes I don't think I can wait until Christmas" replied Jill

"I don't know" said Ash

"You've got to finish it" replied matron "It would be a shame not to after all your hard work" she added.

Ash took the sketch pads back she opened one up and ripped the picture of the royal out and gave it to matron "I want you to have this as a thank-you for all you've done for us" said Ash "Thank-you I know just where to put this" replied matron with a smile on her face. They finished their drinks while Gordon looked at some of the other sketches "Right home I think" said Jill.


	14. Chapter 14

They arrived home Jill and Ash followed Gordon's car onto the drive. Given the choice Ash always would choose Jill's car this was because Ash had always been closer to her mum they had some of their best chats in the car alone and also because she had a better taste in music. Gordon had got out the car and opened the front door when he came back to help Jill with the bags

"How are we doing?" he asked

"O.k. I think a little sore it was a bit bumpy and uncomfortable" replied Jill

"Well let's get you in and comfy" said Gordon smiling at Ash.

Although she didn't like to admit it the journey had taken more out of her then she would like to admit. Jill followed Ash into the front room they got her on the sofa and put the television on

"Do you want anything? Dinner will be ready in about forty minutes" said Jill

"No I'm fine thanks" replied Ash

"Well you can have your dinner in here on a tray" said Gordon

"No" replied Ash "No special treatment please" she begged.

They were never allowed to eat in the front room they had to eat all their meals at the dining room or kitchen table. Jill and Gordon left her to get settled

"Just shout if you need anything" said Jill as she reached the doorway

"O.k. thanks" said Ash who was already starting to feel her eyelids getting heavy. About fifteen minutes later when the dinner was in the oven Jill went to check on Ash who was sound asleep looking uncomfortable on the sofa so she gently removed her shoes and put her feet up, found a blanket and put that over her. She then went to find Gordon who was finishing some notes in the study. She stood in the doorway for a minute then walked over and handed him the glass of wine she had poured for him

"How is she" he asked

"She's sound asleep" replied Jill "Dinners going to be about half an hour" she added and then left him to it she didn't even wait for a response. Jill then set the table ready and then went and sat in the front room being careful not to wake her. She then sat down in the chair and switched the television off and picking up a medical journal from the coffee table.

Twenty five minutes later she got up to check on dinner which was ready she called Gordon who went and woke Ash up. Jill was bring the last plate through as Ash made her way to the table Gordon was just behind her because she seemed a little unsteady. As she sat in the chair she winced. The pain was starting to get unbearable although she wouldn't let on. They had been sat at the table for ten minutes Jill and Gordon had just about finished and were deep in conversation.

Ash had only eaten half and for the last five minutes been pushing food around her plate when all of a sudden she asked "Please may I be excused" Jill and Gordon both looked up

"Yes of course you can, is everything alright?" asked Jill seeing Ash had hardly touched her food and was looking rather pale

"I'm fine just a little tired" Ash lied "Goodnight love you" she added.

"Yes goodnight, love you too" replied Gordon

"I'll be up in a minute to make sure you've got everything" said Jill.

"O.k." said Ash she didn't have the energy to tell her not to bother as she made her way up stairs she could hear Jill and Gordon talking they were really worried about her, how could she put their minds at rest she was already hiding the pain from them.

Jill and Gordon decided to give her a few minutes to get herself sorted this would be the first time she had been in her room since the accident they cleared the dinner table and done the dishes. As they were washing up

Jill suddenly said "I'm really worried about her I think there's something that she's not telling us"

"We can only hope she'll tell us in her own time if we push her to hard who knows what will happen" replied Gordon

"I know you're right but I can't help but worry" replied Jill

"Well all we can do is let her know we're here and you never know maybe the others being here might help, she might even talk to one of them" said Gordon.

"Yes you're right, we need to be as normal as possible" said Jill. When they had finished Jill made her way upstairs with a glass of water and some pain killers. Ash was already in bed trying to read

"Ash sweetheart, here you are" said Jill handing over the tablets and water

"Thanks" smiled Ash

"Is everything alright, do you need anything else" questioned Jill

"Yeah I'm fine just tired, no I don't think so" replied Ash

"Well you know where we are if you do, any time" replied Jill taking the glass and the book and putting them on the table, she then gave her a kiss on the forehead

"Goodnight, sweetheart" Jill said

"Night mum" replied Ash Jill made her way out switching off the light as she went she closed the door but left it slightly ajar so they would be able to hear if Ash made any sound.

She made her way back downstairs and found Gordon on the sofa who was watching the news he had made them both a cup of tea

"She's in bed, I've given her some medication" said Jill as she sat next to him, Gordon put his arm around her and she leaned in and put her head on his shoulder, it wasn't long before they went up to bed they too were tired as they hadn't had a proper night's sleep since that fateful day.

They made their way up quietly so not to wake Ash as they made their way past they poked their heads in to check on her it was a great weight off their minds to have their little girl back safe in their house they were never going to let her out of their sights again one of them was going to know where she was every minute of the day.


	15. Chapter 15

All of them got the best night's sleep they had had for weeks, Jill had got up once to check on her through the night because she thought she had heard a sound but Ash was sleeping peacefully so Jill didn't disturb her, the next time she woke was when the alarm clock was going off, they got up and got ready then made their way downstairs. Jill made breakfast, while Gordon made the drinks

"Ash breakfast's ready" shouted Gordon from the kitchen

"There's no need to shout I'm just here" replied Ash making her way down the last steps

"Sorry, how did you sleep?" said Gordon

"Alright thanks, did someone come in my room" queried Ash

"Yes I did sorry I thought I heard something did I wake you" said Jill

"No I was awake anyway I had just moved because my leg was a bit achy sorry I didn't mean to wake you" replied Ash

"That's alright as long as it wasn't pain" replied Jill with a smile. They sat there having breakfast

"So what have you got planned for today?" asked Gordon

"Well I thought I would start with a run along the beach, then come back and have a nice long bath" Joked Ash.

Both Ash and Gordon burst into laughter at the look of horror on Jill's face

"Ha-ha very funny, maybe its best if I stay here this morning, or you could come into work with us" retorted Jill

"No, I was going to take it easy I promise" replied Ash

"Well I don't know, what do you think Gordon" said Jill jokingly

"Dad" said Ash.

This time it was Jill and Gordon laughing "Well I think we can leave her" said Gordon

"Well we'll be back at lunchtime and phone us if you need anything" said Jill.

"O.k. mum can you help me with something before you go" said Ash

"Yes of course, you go on up I'll be there in a minute" replied Jill.

Jill cleaned the breakfast table and washed the dishes while Gordon went upstairs and finished getting ready he came back down and took over the drying up. Jill gave him a peck on the cheek

"I'll see you at work later" she said

"Yes see you later" replied Gordon.

Jill made her way upstairs she had just reached Ash's room when she heard the front door close "So what can I do for you?" asked Jill

"Can you help me get some clothes out please" asked Ash

"Yes, yes of course I should of thought" replied Jill. When they had chosen the clothes

"Is there anything else" asked Jill

"No I think I'm alright thanks mum" replied Ash

"Right well I'll see you later then" said Jill "Remember you can't have a medicine until lunch and call if you need anything" she added

"Yes I'll be fine, you don't want to be late" replied Ash

"Well if you're sure I can always go in later" replied Jill

"Yes I'm sure, now go" replied Ash.

Five minutes later and Jill was out the door somewhat reluctantly she wasn't sure leaving her alone was the best thing to do, when she got to the hospital Gordon was making tea

"Hello, everything alright" he said

"Yes, I'm just not sure we've done the right thing" replied Jill

"I know but she has to know we trust her" replied Gordon

"I know, I know I just can't get this feeling out my head that I'm missing something" said Jill

"It's only for today the others are back tonight don't forget" replied Gordon

"Yes I know talking about that we need to go shopping tonight you know how much the boy's eat" said Jill

Before they could decide whose turn it was Lizzie interrupted them "Sorry doctors there's a phone call for you"

"I'll take it Lizzie thanks" said Gordon they quickly made their way to Gordon's office, Gordon picked up the phone

"Hello" He said somewhat shakily

"Hi dad, it's me Katie, are you alright" she said on the other end of the phone

"Yes, yes we're fine Katie" he said somewhat relieved the panic gone from Jill's face as well

"Well I just phoned to let you know I'll be home around half five".

Jill left Gordon to the conversation her first patients had just arrived and if she wanted to leave on time she had better get started. It was like that all morning either time one of them had a phone call or message they automatically had this bad feeling. The rest of the morning went by without too much trouble just the usual time wasters or people who didn't like to make a fuss.

Ash however had had a pretty quite morning she had managed to get dressed although it took longer than normal, she then had made her way downstairs and switched on the television just for some back ground noise she could never get use to how quite it was with no-one else around, she then made her way to where her parents kept their photos she needed at least another half a dozen if she was going to finish the collage. She had them laid out on the dining room table keeping an eye on the time she didn't want them to know anymore than they did already. She had picked out a couple and removed them from the album if she only took a couple at a time they hopefully wouldn't notice it's not like they got them out very often anyway.

After switching the television off, she decided to sit outside with her sketch book, she still had to finish the one that had got her into trouble in the first place. She sat at the table near the kitchen window so she could see when Jill and Gordon arrived she didn't want them seeing the pictures and she knew they would panic if they couldn't find her if she didn't reply to their calls. So deep was her concentration she didn't hear them arrive, the first she knew they had was when Jill came walking up calling her name so she didn't have time to put it away

"That's better now it's got my beautiful baby in there" said Jill brushing hair from Ash's face

"Mum" whinged Ash

"What you are my baby and always will be" said Jill

"Mum" she winged then added "Don't say that and you're not suppose to see it yet" replied Ash

"Sorry, I just can't help it" replied Jill. Gordon made his way out with a tray of lemonade

"Is everything alright" he asked

"Yes" replied Ash and Jill,

Then Jill added "I'll just go and make some lunch."

Gordon sat down at the table "What is it?" he asked

"Nothing" replied Ash

"Don't give me that, we know something isn't right" he replied

"It's nothing really" replied Ash getting frustrated

"Well if you can't talk to us can you talk to someone else please" pleaded Gordon

"There's nothing to talk about" shouted Ash as she made to get up and go indoors

"What's all this shouting about?" said Jill making her way over with the sandwiches.

"Ash come and sit down and have your lunch please" said Jill. Ash turned back around and sat down again

"Now is someone going to tell me what all that shouting was about then" said Jill getting angry

"Nothing" said Ash

"Don't give me that you don't just shout for nothing" replied Jill sternly

"O.k. dad said I need to talk to someone because you think there's something wrong with me" replied Ash trying to bite back the tears.

"Ohh Ash sweetheart" said Jill taking her hand

"We're just worried about you that's all, yes I think you're not telling us something and I don't want you to think if you feel you can't tell us that you couldn't tell someone else that's all, come here" said Jill giving Ash a cuddle and gently rubbing her back while also giving Gordon a look of disgust.

They spent the rest of the time in silence "Right well we've got to get going" said Gordon getting up and taking the empty plates and glasses and going indoors

"Are you going to be alright, is there anything I can get before we go" said Jill

"I'll be fine, when can I take more medicine?" asked Ash

"I can give you some now" said Jill getting up and going to the kitchen to fetch some "Anything else" said Jill as she handed over the pills

"No thanks, I'm fine" replied Ash

"Right just so you know, one of us will be back late one of us has to go shopping and Katie phoned she'll be here about half five" said Jill

"O.k. thanks mum" smiled Ash

"Bye Ash, come on Jill we'll be late" shouted Gordon from the kitchen door

"Bye dad" shouted Ash

"O.k. I'm just coming" replied Jill she then turned round and said to Ash "See you later"

"Yeah see you later" replied Ash.

Jill then made her way through the house and to the car where Gordon was already waiting "What did you have to go and say that for?" asked Jill as she got in the car.

"I thought you two were having some sort of argument" replied Gordon "I was trying to help" he added.

"I know, but we're going to have to tread carefully from now on" replied Jill leaning over and giving him a peck on the cheek.

Gordon then pulled out the drive "So what were you two talking about it looked a bit tense" asked Gordon

"Ohh I saw the picture from the other day and I shouldn't have and I called her my beautiful baby" said Jill.

"What that's it" replied Gordon

"Yes" replied Jill "I was trying to act like normal hoping she would open up" she added

"Sorry" said Gordon

"Well no harm done" said Jill then she added "But for that you can go food shopping" she thought it would take more persuading but Gordon gave in rather easily

"O.k. give me the list and I'll go" he replied

"Are you sure" she questioned

"Well I only seem to be getting it wrong with Ash at the moment, maybe it's best if you two have a little time together" he replied as they pulled into the hospital

"I love you Gordon Ormerod" said Jill

"And I love you Mrs Ormerod" replied Gordon taking her arm so she turned back around and giving her a kiss. They didn't see each other for the rest of the day it was only when Jill knocked on Gordon's door

"Come in" said Gordon.

Jill opened the door and walked in "Right I'm off, I'll see you at home" said Jill

"Yes right well I'll be leaving once I've done this" replied Gordon.

Jill made to go out and turned round "ohh and here you go, you didn't think I'd forgotten did you" said Jill handing over the shopping list

"No of course not, I wouldn't be so lucky" replied Gordon with a chuckle.


	16. Chapter 16

Jill arrived home to the sound of laughter coming from the kitchen she put her coat and bag away and shouted "hello".

Katie popped her head around the kitchen door "Hi mum" said Katie,

"Hello, are you alright" said Jill making her way to the kitchen

"Yeah we're fine" replied Katie.

Ash was still sat at the table "Hi mum" said Ash. Jill made her way over to her and placed a hand on top of her head

"And how are you doing" Jill asked

"Yeah I'm fine" replied Ash

"Where's dad" asked Katie

"He's just gone shopping he won't be long" replied Jill.

"Mum about before I'm sorry" said Ash

"I'm sorry too" replied Jill.

Jill and Katie then set about getting dinner ready "Can I help?" asked Ash

"No I think we've got everything covered" replied Jill

"Katie can you lay the table please" said Jill

"I can help" said Ash

"No you stay there your still suppose to be resting" said Jill

"That doesn't mean I still can't help, I've been resting all day" replied Ash

"It does when I say so" said Jill sternly

"I'm sorry it's just so boring" replied Ash.

"That's alright I'll find some things you can do for me tomorrow how does that sound" replied Jill. She knew what Ash was going through she had been exactly the same when she had been told to rest all she wanted to do was to get back to work.

"Yeah" said Ash excitedly. There was a knock at the door

"I'll get it" shouted Katie from the dining room making her way to the front door

"I wonder who that can be we're not expecting anyone" said Jill. It was sister Brigid she had come to see Ash as she hadn't been able to see her apart from the time Ash had pushed her away and she wanted to talk to her to make sure everything was fine between them, she still didn't believe what matron had said to her that day in her eyes she had done nothing wrong.

Katie opened the door "Hello, Katie how are you" said sister Brigid

"Hi" said Katie then she turned and shouted "Mum".

Jill popped her head around the kitchen door "Yes" before she could say anything else she saw who it was at the door making her way out the kitchen and shutting the door behind her

"Ahh, hello sister, how can we help you, Katie can you go and check on the potatoes please" said Jill giving Katie's arm a gentle squeeze as she said it.

"Yes of course" replied Katie who then made her way to the kitchen, Jill turned back to sister Brigid

"I've come to see Aisling" replied sister Brigid to Jill's first question

"Well I'm afraid she's not up for visits" replied Jill

"Yes well I'm not just anyone I'm family" replied sister Brigid trying to make her way in Jill stood firm in the way

"Well like I said no visits" replied Jill she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Gordon's car pulling in the drive. Gordon got out the car leaving the shopping and walked to the two people in the doorway

"Hello Sister what can we do for you" said Gordon

"I've come to see Aisling, but Jill won't let me in" said Sister,

Gordon didn't have time to reply as Jill said "Like I said Ash is not up for visits"

"Well if Jill has said she's not up for visits, she's not I'm afraid maybe the weekend" suggested Gordon

"Well o.k. doctor if you think it's best" replied sister Brigid "Tell her I popped around will you and I'll see her at the weekend" she added

"Will do" said Gordon.

Jill and Gordon watched sister Brigid ride down the drive "Right I'll help you with the bags" said Jill they made their way with arms full of bags into the kitchen which was now empty the back door wide open Jill and Gordon dumped the bags where they could and ran out the door they didn't have to go far.

Ash had decided she couldn't face sister Brigid and had gone out the back gate and was leaning against the wall staring out to sea chatting to Katie

"Don't you ever do that again" said Gordon slightly out of breath

"You scared us both" added Jill taking both girls into a hug

"I'm sorry it's my fault, I just can't face her yet" said Ash

"Right no harm done but we've got to get the shopping put away" said Gordon making his way back towards the house followed by Katie.

Jill walked with Ash who was slightly slower seeing as she still was using crutches they got to the garden table "Ash sit down here with me I need to talk to you" said Jill concern in her voice.

Meanwhile Gordon and Katie were packing the shopping away "Dad, she will be alright won't she" asked Katie

"Yes she'll be fine, as soon as we can get her to talk to us we're have a better understanding" replied Gordon

"Is it sister Brigid" asked Katie

"We know she's part of it, we've all just got to be there for her" said Gordon

"O.k. dad" replied Katie

"Jill and I will fill you in on the situation tonight once she's in bed, we'll do the same with the boy's when they arrive, but if she tells you anything no matter how small you must tell us" said Gordon stressing the last part

"Yeah will do dad" replied Katie.

Jill and Ash were sat at the table "Ash, sweetheart you can't keep running away" said Jill

"I know but I don't want to leave with her" replied Ash

"I want to stay here with you" she added

"Ash you're not going anywhere I promise we won't allow it" replied Jill she then added "Come here, my beautiful baby girl"

"Mum" whinged Ash

"I know, now I've got to get dinner dished up, do you want to give me a hand" Jill asked

"Yes please" replied Ash eager to help they made their way back in as they we're dishing up "Mum, can we have a talk just us tomorrow" Ash asked all of a sudden Jill was taken aback

"Yes of course we can" Jill replied

"Thanks" smiled Ash

"Anytime" replied Jill.

They sat down to dinner to hear stories of what Katie had been doing at university when it was over Katie and Jill went to do the dishes, Gordon had gone through to the study to do some paperwork instead of doing it tomorrow. Ash was sat watching the television, she was starting to nod off so decided to go on up to bed. She said goodnight to Gordon first then went and said goodnight to Jill and Katie after Jill had checked she was alright and told her she would be up in a minute she made her way upstairs.

She got a pad and paper and put it on the bedside table for later, she then got ready for bed she had just finished getting ready when Jill came up to make sure everything was o.k. and to give her, her medication. Jill then tucked her in, kissed her goodnight then left like the night before leaving the door slightly ajar.

Ash then waited as she heard Jill make her way downstairs, she then heard them start talking only then did she switch on her bedside lamp, she then took the notepad and pen and started to make points about what she was going to say tomorrow. She thought this was the best way to get everything out and also help to make it clear in her own mind, Ash hadn't realised how the time had gone it was only when she heard her parents coming up the stairs she quickly dumped her pad and pen on the side and picked up a book, Jill poked her head around the door

"Ash is everything alright" Jill asked concerned

"Yes, I couldn't get to sleep so thought I would read for a bit" replied Ash

"Right well not too much longer then" replied Jill she then made her way out shutting the door behind her.

Ash put the book back and carried on making notes it didn't take that much longer to finish she just wished this would make everything clearer, she switched off the light and went to sleep she only woke up when Gordon was shouting at her that breakfast was ready she made her way down, she would need Jill's help with her clothes again

"Morning" Ash said sleepily as she walked into the kitchen

"Good morning" replied Gordon before turning to Jill and saying "I'll see you at work"

"Yes I'll be there in a bit" replied Jill.

Gordon then went and said goodbye to Katie who was sat in the front room he then left.

Jill asked "How are you?"

"I'm fine, just tired" replied Ash

"Well maybe this list wasn't such a good idea then" replied Jill

"No I want to do something, it's so boring otherwise, please I promise I won't do too much, please" begged Ash,

"Well if you're sure" replied Jill

"Yes" replied Ash. Jill then went up and laid out some clothes then double checked everything and everyone was fine then she left.

Ash sat there for a while she didn't have the energy today to get up and start moving about she looked at the list that Jill had left her most of it looked easy enough, Katie came through

"Hi, what are you up to" asked Katie

"Not much mum's left a list of things she wants me to do" replied Ash

"Let's have a look then" replied Katie. Ash passed the list over

"Do you want a hand" asked Katie but before Ash could respond she added "We could do it like the old days turn the music up really loud and we'd have it done in next to no time then you can do whatever you like"

Ash thought about it for a while she knew why Katie wanted to help so they could keep a close eye on her but she knew she wouldn't get half of it done today with the way she was feeling

"Yeah sounds good to me, just let me get dressed" said Ash

"O.k. give us a shout when you're ready" replied Katie.

Half an hour later Ash called for Katie she was finally ready Katie came into her room carrying her radio, which she tuned into the local radio station and turned the volume up. They started by tidying up their bedrooms even though Katie's room wasn't on the list they then went downstairs and tidied the front room and dining room that only left the kitchen and putting the washing out, Katie put the washing out while Ash started on the dishes, she dropped the tea towel and as she bent down to pick it up the pain became unbearable just at that moment Katie came in through the back door

"Ash what's wrong" she asked panicked

"I'm fine I just dropped the tea towel that's all" lied Ash

"Well sit down, I'll call mum" replied Katie

"No, I'm fine really" said Ash carrying on with the dishes.

They finished cleaning the kitchen Ash could feel Katie watching her every move

"Well that's all the jobs done what are you going to do now" said Katie

"I'm going to go and do some drawing in my room, what about you" replied Ash

"I was thinking about meeting some friends in town after lunch if you're alright" said Katie

Before Ash could reply the phone rang Katie went to answer it was Jill to say they wouldn't make it back for lunch today unless they really needed them, Katie was just about to say something when Ash took the phone from her and told Jill everything was fine and that they would see them later she then put the phone down.

"What did you do that for" asked Katie clearly annoyed

"Because there's nothing wrong, that's why" replied Ash

"Well I'll just phone her back then and we're see what she has to say shall we" replied Katie with one hand on the phone

"O.k. call her back but your be wasting her time there's nothing wrong" bluffed Ash she then turned away and went upstairs to her room and got her sketch pad out, she could hear Katie on the phone five minutes later Katie knocked on her door

"Come in" said Ash

"Mum's on her way and she's not happy with you" said Katie

"Well she'll be even angrier with you when she finds out you've wasted her time" retorted Ash

"Why are you being like this" asked Katie

"I'm not the one poking their nose in" said Ash.

Katie could tell this was going nowhere and decided to leave her alone until Jill got there. Ash was really angry that no-one seemed to listen to her anymore, she hated Katie for telling Jill and she hated the fact that she couldn't go very far without someone being with her or knowing exactly where she was, she wasn't in the mood to draw anymore but she left it out so she could pretend that was what she had been doing before being rudely interrupted, she laid on her bed staring at the ceiling hating the fact that she had just had an argument with Katie for no reason she was only doing what Mum and Dad had asked she hadn't asked for this either.

Ash was brought out of her thoughts when she heard Katie opening the front door and quickly explaining everything that had happened that morning as they were coming up the stairs,

"O.k. thanks Katie go and wait downstairs I call you if I need any help" said Jill outside of Ash's room she then knocked on the door she didn't wait for a reply she just walked in

"Right young lady what's been going on and I want the truth" said Jill to Ash who was now sat at her desk with her sketch pad open

"Mum" said Ash while shutting her sketch pad quickly Jill sat on the bed and motioned for Ash to join her

"Well I'm waiting" said Jill as Ash made her way over

"I'm fine really" lied Ash

"Well Katie doesn't seem to think so" said Jill

"I told her she was wasting your time but she wouldn't listen" said Ash

"Well from what she's told me it's you that's wasting my time" replied Jill

"I'm fine really I would just like to be left alone now" replied Ash getting up and returning to her desk

"I'm not going anywhere until I get the truth" said Jill

"Well I've told you the truth" lied Ash

"Well I'll be downstairs when you decide to tell the truth" said Jill getting up and going to the door.

Jill couldn't understand what was going on she thought she had got somewhere with Ash yesterday Ash was even asking to talk to her maybe they were both telling the truth she knew she couldn't stay that much longer she had to go back for evening surgery. Jill went back down and started talking to Katie trying to get as much of the picture as possible

"Mum I know she dropped the tea towel but she was clearly in pain when she tried to pick it up, but she wouldn't let me phone you and then when you phoned she snatched the phone from me when I was going to tell you, I promise you" said Katie for the third time

"I know sweetheart, but she's not telling me anything" replied Jill clearly worried she looked at the clock "I've got to get going soon, will you be alright" asked Jill

"Yeah we'll be fine but what if she's in pain again" asked Katie

"Just phone and one of us will get here, who knows maybe your Dad will have more luck" replied Jill

"I doubt it very much, they don't have a great track record" replied Katie

"That's true" replied Jill getting up

"Ash, I'll see you later call if you need anything" Jill shouted up the stairs

"Bye" shouted Ash

"See you later, and thank you" said Jill to Katie

"Yeah see you later" replied Katie shutting the door behind her.

Jill got into the car frustrated wait until Gordon hears about this she thought she knew who he would believe maybe that's why she was hoping it wasn't as bad as it seemed they didn't need any more arguments at the moment especially as Ash was still so vulnerable she couldn't bear the thought of Ash running away again or even worse just shutting them out completely. Jill arrived at the hospital Gordon was outside to greet her

"So what was it then" asked Gordon

"I don't know I couldn't get to the bottom of it they both say their telling the truth and I didn't have time to keep going round in circles" replied Jill

"Right well we'll sit down and talk it out over dinner" replied Gordon

"What good cop, bad cop" replied Jill

"Yes if we have to" replied Gordon they made their way in he could tell this was eating Jill up but they couldn't do anything now.

Evening surgery was uneventful much to Gordon and Jill's luck which meant they actually got to do their ward rounds on time for once, it didn't happen very often but when it did they made the most of it. Jill finished her ward round first and went to finish her paperwork at least she wouldn't have to do any over the weekend, Gordon knocked on her door when he was done

"Are you ready" he asked

"One minute" replied Jill making the last few notes and returning the lid to her fountain pen

"Yes all done" she said.

"It's alright for some" joked Gordon he then added "You could always help with mine"

"You should be so lucky" replied Jill with a giggle they both got up and made their way home.


	17. Chapter 17

They arrived home put their coats and bags away and went into the front room where they found Katie sitting on her own watching the television

"Hello" said Gordon and Jill as they made their way in

"Hi, mum, dad I'm sorry about earlier I think I've made it worse" replied Katie clearly upset

"Don't worry we've known there's something she's not saying" replied Gordon sitting next to her and putting an arm around her,

"Where is she" asked Jill

"She hasn't come out of her room all afternoon" replied Katie

"Right we're going to get this sorted once and for all" said Gordon

"Well let's not go in all guns blazing" replied Jill

"Well what do you think we should do we've been patient up until now" replied Gordon

"I know but we don't need to push her away now, why don't you start on dinner I'll go and see if she'll talk to me now she's had time to calm down" replied Jill

"O.k. but if she doesn't then we do it my way" replied Gordon

"Agreed" said Jill giving Gordon a peck on the cheek she then made her way upstairs,

Ash was led on her bed listening to music when she heard a knock on the door she switched off the music just as Jill opened the door

"Can I come in" asked Jill

"Of course" said Ash

"Look we need to talk or your dad's going to start asking questions" said Jill sitting on the bed next to her

"What do you want to know" asked Ash

"Well let's start with earlier on shall we" said Jill pleased that they were starting to get somewhere

"I told you I was fine I just dropped the tea towel that's all I just wish people would listen and not stick their noses in where it's not wanted" replied Ash

"O.k. we're just trying to look after you because we love you" replied Jill

"I know but it just feels like everything I do is being watched and reported back, and I can't do anything right at the moment" replied Ash trying to bite back the tears that were so close to coming Jill could tell this so changed the subject

"So what have you done this afternoon then" Jill asked

"I've done some drawing then I felt tired so I just listened to some music" replied Ash glad for a conversation that seemed a bit more normal

"How was work" she asked Jill went along with the conversation knowing this was what Ash needed at the moment

"Ohh you know the normal, patients, ward round and paperwork" replied Jill

"Speaking of which I need to change you dressings tonight before you go to bed" Jill added

"O.k." replied Ash. Gordon then came up the stairs with drinks for both of them he knocked on the door that was slightly ajar

"I thought you could do with some drinks" he said handing Jill both drinks

"Thanks" replied Jill and Ash. Jill also gave Gordon a nod which he knew meant that they were talking

"Right well dinner will ready in three quarters of an hour" he said while leaving them to it

"O.k. we'll be down in a bit" replied Jill. After Gordon had gone Jill broke the silence

"So what did you want to talk to me about" she asked while handing Ash a glass

"Thanks" said Ash taking the drink

"It doesn't matter now" she added putting the glass down on the bedside table. Jill thought maybe it had been too soon to ask that question but she decided to push the matter anyway

"Why not" Jill asked for a minute Ash didn't know what to say

"Look you know what ever you say can stay between just us" said Jill

"I know, it's just" said Ash pensively

"It's just probably for the best if I don't tell you" said Ash

"I don't understand you we're asking to talk yesterday what happened today to make you change your mind" replied Jill

"Nothing" lied Ash

"Don't lie to me I know when you're lying" said Jill getting frustrated

"I don't want to cause anymore pain that's all" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, if you need to talk about it no matter what pain it will cause I'm here for you" said Jill

"But if I tell you it will never be the same again" replied Ash

"Yes it will" replied Jill

"How do you know you can't promise it" said Ash tears starting to fall

"Ash sweetheart, it will be o.k. I promise" replied Jill wiping away the tears

"But if I tell you, you're treat me differently I know you will" sobbed Ash

"It can't be that bad" replied Jill giving Ash a cuddle

"I promise I will do my very best not to treat you any different" Jill added

"I tell you what why don't we have this conversation tomorrow, we could get the others to go out so we have the house to ourselves" Jill said concerned that Ash thought this bad enough she felt she couldn't tell them

"O.k." replied Ash "Right let's wash your face then go downstairs" said Jill getting up Ash followed she was really tired the tiding up she had done earlier had really taken it out of her

"Are you alright" asked Jill concerned

"Yeah, I'm just tired I think I done too much today" said Ash

"Well it's an early night tonight then no reading" said Jill "O.k." said Ash she didn't have the energy to argue. Once she had washed her face they made their way downstairs

"Just in time" said Gordon carrying some plates through followed by Katie. They all sat down together

"Ash about before I'm sorry" said Katie

"I'm sorry too" replied Ash

"So what are you doing tomorrow Katie" asked Jill

"I haven't got any plans why" replied Katie

"Ohh no reason I just wondered" replied Jill.

They spent the rest of the time making small talk; Ash had hardly eaten anything which didn't go unnoticed by Jill

"Ash are you sure your alright" said Jill

"Yes I'm fine just tired" replied Ash

"Well can you try and eat a little more for me then" replied Jill

"O.k." replied Ash she did manage to eat a little more but not enough to stop Jill from worrying,

Gordon and Katie had gone into the front room, Jill was in the kitchen tiding up Gordon's mess leaving Ash alone in the dining room she got up and went to the kitchen

"I'm sorry mum I can't eat anymore, I'm going to go on up to bed, goodnight" said Ash

"That's alright, I'll be there in a minute" replied Jill.

Ash then went upstairs she didn't even bother to say goodnight to Gordon or Katie she just went straight upstairs, she was just sat on her bed she hadn't even started getting ready for bed when Jill came up with her doctors bag

"Are you alright if I do these now" asked Jill seeing Ash hadn't even got ready for bed yet

"Yeah, no problem" replied Ash starting to get undressed Jill could see she was having difficulty so decided to give a hand, Ash didn't even try to stop her which wasn't like her she was normally very independent. After Jill had changed the dressings and they had managed to get her into pyjamas she tucked her in

"Goodnight sweetheart" Jill said giving her a kiss on the forehead

"Night mum, thanks" replied Ash.

Jill left the door slightly ajar if Ash needed her tonight was going to be the night she thought, she made her way downstairs she found Gordon and Katie still in the front room

"Where's Ash" asked Gordon

"She's in bed did she not say goodnight to you" asked Jill

"No" replied Katie

"Well she was very tired I think she's done too much too soon" replied Jill

"Speaking of which would you two mind giving us a little space tomorrow" Jill added

"No of course not, I was going to meet some friends anyway" replied Katie

"I could always go in to work and do my paperwork" replied Gordon

"Great thanks" replied Jill sitting next to Gordon.


	18. Chapter 18

The following morning Ash was the first up she was feeling better this morning and had been awake

for a while before she decided to go on downstairs she started to get the breakfast things ready trying to be helpful she knew how difficult she had been the last few weeks Jill was the first to come down

"Morning" she said surprised that anyone else was up "How are you this morning" she added

"I'm fine" replied Ash getting up and putting her bowl and glass in the sink she then made her way out of the kitchen where she meet Gordon and Katie coming down the stairs deep in conversation they stopped when they saw her.

"Morning" they all said at the same time, Ash moved aside to let them pass then made her way upstairs, Ash stayed in her room until they both had gone she didn't want to argue with them and she knew she would because they made her so angry talking about her like that as if she wasn't there. She made her way downstairs and found Jill in the front room reading.

"Are you alright, you're very quiet this morning" asked Jill placing her book down

"Yes I'm fine, I just wish... It doesn't matter" replied Ash sitting down

"No go on" said Jill

"I just wish if they are going to talk about me they do it to my face or when I'm not around" replied Ash

"I'll have a word with them" replied Jill she could see how angry this was making Ash

"No don't worry about it" replied Ash

"Well we've got the house to ourselves how about I make some drinks and then we can have that little chat" said Jill

"Sounds great" said Ash, terrified about what was about to happen, she went upstairs and got her notes all of a sudden she had become terribly nervous, it was worse than standing up in front of class and giving a speech, this could change everything forever.

Jill had made them both a cup of tea and sat down on the sofa near to Ash who had decided to sit in the chair, she took the cup of tea from Jill

"Thanks" Ash said

"You're welcome" replied Jill

They sat in silence for a while after that Jill could see how nervous Ash was she hadn't taken her eyes away from her cup of tea and her fingers were tracing the pattern on the cup. Jill was thinking maybe this wasn't such a good idea maybe now wasn't the right time.

Then Ash started to talk she didn't remove her gaze from her cup of tea

"Mum I'm so sorry for how I've acted over the last few weeks, It's just that I've been so confused, I know I should of talked to you sooner but I don't know how to explain it" Said Ash

It was only now that Jill realised that ash had put her cup down and was actually holding a notepad which had her neat writing on it but that it was also tear stained and the corner had been ripped where Ash had been fiddling with it.

"It's just I feel like I've let everyone down, and if my real parents didn't want me there must be something wrong with me, I feel like I don't know who I am anymore" said Ash

But before she could say anymore there was a knock at the door "I'll get it" said Ash getting up and throwing the notepad down on the seat. Jill picked up the notepad she could only make out some of the words but she was beginning to see how confused Ash had been feeling and that how the tip toeing around had not helped the situation, then she saw it at the bottom of the page two words in capitals and underlined pain and how?.

Jill still had the notepad in her hand when Ash walked in followed by Sister Brigid. Ash saw this and made a quick excuse to leave the room saying she would make some drinks

"Hello Jill how are you" said sister Brigid as she sat down in the chair

"I'm fine thanks how are you" replied Jill

"I'm grand thank you and how's Aisling doing" replied Sister

"As well as can be expected, I'd better go and give her a hand" replied Jill

Jill just wanted to wrap her arms around her and tell her everything would be alright, but she knew Ash had sat in the chair for a reason. She was cutting herself off from them, she needed to find out who she was on her own and sort out these questions that were now deeply imbedded in her mind.

Jill couldn't help wondering if they had lost their daughter already although she was home she wasn't really home.


	19. Chapter 19

Even though they needed the time alone it was one of those days first sister Brigid arrived and stayed for half the morning and then both boys arrived home both tired from their journeys and looking forward to just relaxing in the garden. Jill had more questions from this morning and she could tell Ash needed to tell her something.

Ash had been up in her room since sister Brigid had left, it hadn't gone very well sister had not been willing to listen to Ash, she seemed to be hearing something different from what was being said.

Sister had even asked her to go away on holiday just the two of them for a couple of weeks, Ash had said no but sister was having none of it. It was only when Jill stepped in and said she couldn't go because of commitments that she started to listen.

Jill waited until Gordon got home then she went up to check on Ash who was sat at her desk with lots of balled up paper thrown around her room.

"What's going on here, is everything alright" Ask Jill concerned

"Yeah everything's fine, I just can't seem to get this drawing quite right" replied Ash

Jill could see she had been crying her eyes were still red and puffy, Jill was just about to say something but Ash got there first

"About before I'm sorry you weren't meant to find out like that" said Ash the tears starting to fall again

"Do you want to tell me what's going on" replied Jill calmly

Ash moved over to the bed, Jill sat next to her

"Well the thing is... It's like this" said Ash trying to find the words

"It's alright take your time, I understand how confused you've been, but you are still you no matter what" replied Jill

Ash took a deep breath "Thanks for understanding, I realised that today I suppose sister Brigid has helped in some way" said Ash

"Just don't tell her or we'll never hear the end of it" replied Jill they both giggled at this last remark

"Well I suppose I thought I wasn't good enough to be here anymore, it was like I had failed all I've ever wanted is to be just like you, and the thought that I hadn't turned out more like you and dad, that everything I had done was wrong, but today helped me figure a few things out like no matter what you and dad are my parents and always will be, you are my family and I don't need anyone else, you are the best parents in the world and I'm sorry for how I've been towards you" said Ash

Jill was taken aback she didn't know what to say

"You don't have to apologise, we knew you would have questions one day about who your parents are and what their like, I guess sister Brigid just made you think about it in a different way and you know what you are more like us than you think" replied Jill

"Yeah" said Ash looking at Jill

"Yes, just ask anyone they all think you are just like us" replied Jill

"Well there is one more thing I've got this pain it's always there but sometimes it gets really bad" said Ash, before she could finish explaining Jill jumped in

"Where abouts is it, let me have a look" Jill was clearly worried

"Mum, listen I've told the doctor, they said it was normal" replied Ash

"Well, I'll be the judge of that now where is it" said Jill sternly. Ash pointed to the area

"Were you in pain the other day, why didn't you tell me" said Jill

"No I wasn't in pain the other day I swear" Ash lied

"Well I'm taking you to get this looked at" replied Jill

"No, mum please, no fuss" pleaded Ash

"Right well you're having your cast off Monday, I'll do the tests then no arguments, but if you're in pain before then we go in straight away, agreed" said Jill

"Agreed" said Ash

"I wish you had told me about this before" said Jill

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to bother you, I'd already hurt you too much already" replied Ash, happier now this was all out in the open

"Don't be silly, I always want to know no matter what, now let's go downstairs, I need to make sure the others aren't making too much mess" said Jill

"O.k. I'll be down in a minute, I just need to tidy up first" replied Ash

"Just don't be too long" replied Jill, she then left and went downstairs and told Gordon everything. His instinct also told him to get it checked out straight away but Jill told him about the agreement between them so he had to go along with it as well even though both of them didn't like it.

Ash made her way downstairs after tidying her room and washing her face she found her parents in the garden deep in conversation, the boys were playing football, there was still no sign of Katie yet, Ash went and found a spot on the grass away from everyone else, no-one had noticed she was there yet or so she thought, she got out her sketch pad and started doodling. Jill had seen her and was keeping a watchful eye on her any sign of pain and she would know she was beating herself up for not noticing before. If only they hadn't been so busy at work she would've gotten to the bottom of it sooner or so she thought Gordon wasn't as sure.


	20. Chapter 20

Monday morning came around without too much happening for the rest of the weekend, Jill and Gordon hadn't let Ash out of their sights unless she was a sleep even then they kept her door slightly open so they would hear the slightest sound. Ash didn't mind too much she knew she had bought this on by not admitting to it before hand. Ash was going to go in with Jill this morning and hopefully everything would go alright she was going to get the bus back home the other children had offered to go with her but she had turned them all down, which was a good thing because none of them were awake this morning.

Jill and Ash were the first two awake and to go downstairs, Ash had already finished her breakfast when Gordon came down.

"Morning, how are you today" he said

"I'm fine, you" replied Ash

"I'm fine I wish you had talked to us earlier, you've really had us worried" said Gordon

"I'm sorry, I just needed time" replied Ash getting up and putting her dishes in the sink and making her way upstairs to get ready

"We'll be leaving in about ten minutes" said Jill to Ash as she was going through the kitchen doorway

"Okay" replied Ash

Ash made her way upstairs and started getting ready they had laid her clothes out the night before. When she was ready she made her way downstairs and waited patiently by the front door. It wasn't long before Jill made her way downstairs

"Ready" she asked

"Ready" replied Ash

The car journey was a quiet one Jill could tell Ash didn't want to be here and she knew she wouldn't want to bump into sister Brigid. That's what made this harder she parked in her normal spot and helped Ash out then got her bags, Ash had waited by the car took a deep breath and followed Jill into the building.

"Morning Dr Weatherill, ohh and Ash how are you" said Lizzie

"Morning Lizzie" replied Jill taking her patient list

"Morning Lizzie, I'm fine and you" said Ash

"Ohh you know I can't complain" replied Lizzie who was cut short on the conversation because the telephone rang

"Right follow me" said Jill to Ash they stopped off at her office so she could dump her bags and coat and then proceeded onto the emergency room

"Right get up on to the bed please" said Jill

"Should you be doing this" asked Ash

"It's fine I'm just going to take your cast off first then when dad gets here were going to do the other tests" replied Jill

"What other tests, I'm fine really" replied Ash

"We want to rule some things out that's all it won't take long I promise" replied Jill cutting the plaster cast off.

"But, I don't want any more tests please" pleaded Ash

"What's all this" said Sister Brigid "Ohh great" muttered Ash under her breath

"Were just taking Ash's cast off" replied Jill

"Why does no-one tell me when Asiling is here" replied Sister

"I'm fine here, Gordon will be along in a minute if I need any help and I'm sure your busy, Ash will pop along and see you when were done here" replied Jill with that sister left them to it

"Will I" said Ash

"Yes you will, you can see her while we wait for the results" replied Jill

"No-one else gets this trouble" muttered Ash

"What" replied Jill

"Is she giving you trouble" said Gordon as he entered the room

"No, she's not are you" said Jill to Ash

"No, no trouble at all" said Ash

"Well she must be ill then were have to do some more tests" replied Gordon both of them chuckled

They set about doing some more tests it didn't take very long when Gordon went out the room with the samples for testing Jill asked "What did you mean earlier"

"It doesn't matter it's just me being silly" replied Ash

"Yes it does" replied Jill

"Well it's just that sometimes it feels like she wants to be my mum she's always bossing me around and treating me differently, it's just most people who are adopted don't have to deal with a real family member in their life thinking they know what's best all the time, it would be a lot easier if she wasn't around, now I just sound mean" said Ash

"No, not at all if anything that's the truth, I didn't realise it was as bad as all that" replied Jill

"Just promise if it gets too much you find one of us and talk" she added

"Of course, I promise" replied Ash

"Is everything alright" Asked sister "You've been a long time" she added while walking through the door

"Yes we're just waiting for the x-ray results to make sure it's healed" replied Jill

"I can chase them for you" replied sister leaving the room

"Mum she can't she'll know we've done more tests" said Ash panicked

"Hello sister, where are you off to in such a hurry" said Gordon in the corridor

"Hello Dr, I'm just chasing up Asiling's x-ray" replied Sister

"No worries I've got it here I'm sure she'll be along to see you in a minute" replied Gordon

"Okay, thank you doctor" replied Sister carrying on towards the ward

"That was close" Gordon commented walking through the door

"That's all healed and there doesn't appear to be anything showing up on the others" said Jill looking at the x-rays.

"Great does that mean I can go home" Ash asked

"Yes, but I'm going to be keeping a close eye on you" replied Jill

"You better go and say hello to sister first" replied Gordon

Ash left the room in search of Sister Brigid she didn't have to go far she sat and had a cup of tea with sister Brigid talking about nothing in particular, then looking at her watch

"I better be going if I'm going to get the bus, see you soon" said Ash

"Yes see you soon, I'd better be getting back to my duties as well" replied Sister

Ash made her way to reception both her parents were busy with patients and she had wasted enough of their time as it was this morning

"Lizzie can you tell mum and dad I've gone home" Ash asked

"Yes of course" replied Lizzie

"Thanks" replied Ash leaving the Royal, she arrived home to find the others had all gone out to her relief she wasn't in the mood she just wanted to be on her own for a bit the bus journey had been a bit bumpy and she was in a bit of pain.

Ash had the house to herself all day, Jill had phoned at lunch time to make sure she had got home alright and to make sure Sister hadn't upset her too much, Ash told Jill what they had talked about when Jill was happy she left Ash to it.

Ash managed to finish another picture it was easier now she didn't have as much going on inside her head to focus on other things.

Jill and Gordon arrived home it was just the three of them for dinner the others were staying out with friends and wouldn't be back until much later.

Gordon was in the office and Ash was watching the television but the pain was starting to get unbearable when Jill called through that dinner was ready. Jill and Gordon were already at the table when Ash made her way through

"Is everything alright" Gordon asked

"Yeah I'm fine" smiled Ash as she sat down she winced a little hoping neither of them had seen it she started eating.

Ash had only eaten half and for the last five minutes been pushing food around her plate when all of a sudden she asked "Please may I be excused" Jill and Gordon both looked up "Yes of course you can, is everything alright?" asked Jill seeing Ash had hardly touched her food and was looking rather pale "I'm fine just a little tired" Ash lied "Goodnight love you" she added while trying to get up. Jill and Gordon didn't have time to reply before Ash collapsed in the chair with a groan.


	21. Chapter 21

Jill who had been sat on the other side of the table leapt up and ran round the table

"Ash sweetheart what is it" Jill said.

Gordon who was already sat next to her got up

"It's the pain" Ash winced

"Right I'm taking a look at you no arguments" said Gordon picking her up.

"Mum" Ash screamed in pain

"It's alright I'm right behind you" said Jill holding her hand

"Jill the medications in my bag" said Gordon.

Jill nodded and moved towards the front door where the bags were, getting the medication she then went to the kitchen and got a glass of water. When she reached the front room Gordon had managed to get her on the sofa and was trying to calm Ash down and find out where the pain was. Ash who was trying to get comfortable, tears streaming down her face.

"Here you go take these" said Jill giving the tablets to Ash along with the water. Ash split some of the water as she was shaking from the pain

"Sorry" she managed to say through gritted teeth

"It's alright sweetheart" said Jill whilst sitting down on the sofa beside her and stroking her hair away from her eyes. Ash lent in to her mum

"It really hurts" she blubbed

"I know it does" said Jill.

Gordon who stood at the end of the sofa said "Ash where does it hurt".

Ash pointed to her tummy Jill and Gordon looked at each other then Gordon said

"Ash I know it hurts but I need you to lie down"

"Why" asked Ash

"I just need to check that's all" said Gordon

"It's alright sweetheart" assured Jill

"Is this the pain you told us about and is this the worst it has been" asked Gordon

"Yes" said Ash

Gordon checked her tummy Ash winced when he pressed on the right side

"Sorry Ash" he said then looking at Jill "She's tender and there's some guarding"

"Right" replied Jill

"What does that mean" Ash asked while looking from her dad to her mum trying to read their faces for a sign any sign.

"It's probably nothing but we've got to check it out" said Gordon she could tell he was lying but didn't have the strength to argue

"Right I'll get the car ready" said Jill

"I'm so sorry" said Ash

"You've got nothing to be sorry for" replied Gordon.

They could hear Jill on the phone to the royal telling them what was happening and what they would need ready when they got there, she had already moved the cars around. Gordon got Ash into the back of the car

"Mum" Ash said

"Yes, she's coming" replied Gordon

"Jill come on" he shouted

"Yes I'm just coming I was just checking everything was switched off" Jill replied running out the front door and slamming it behind her

"I'll drive you sit in the back with Ash" said Gordon as she made her way to the car

"Yes alright" replied Jill. On the drive in Ash had grown more and more uncomfortable

"It's alright we're nearly there" Jill said soothingly.

They pulled up outside Gordon got out quickly running round the car to where Ash was trying to get out the car but every movement brought on a stabbing pain. Ash was biting back the tears trying not to show how much pain she was in but she could barely move. One of the hospital porters came running out with a wheelchair

"The rooms already for you" he said to Gordon

"O.k. thanks" said Gordon while getting Ash into the chair.

As they rushed into the hospital Jill was handed the notes but she didn't look at them until she had ordered all the tests she needed and Ash had been taken to x-ray.

Jill was pacing up and down all of a sudden she said "Gordon look at this"

Gordon who was away with his own thoughts said "What's that"

"Ash's notes it shows she mentioned the pain the night of the operation and that it's to be expected and they prescribed more pain-relief" said Jill then added while looking further down "It's the same every time she mentions pain"

"No wonder she didn't say anything, she didn't know anything was wrong because no-one else was worried about it" said Gordon

"But I should of realised something was wrong" replied Jill

"We both should of but there's been a lot going on" said Gordon giving Jill a hug then he added "Stay here, I'm just going to make a call"

Jill was left alone she repeatedly went over the notes and replayed the time she had spent with Ash wondering why she hadn't picked up on it sooner. She wasn't alone for long before she heard the nurses bring Ash back. She made herself busy she didn't want Ash to see how worried they were, it would only make it worse and knowing Ash the way she did she knew she would be feeling guilty enough already.

"Hi mum, where's dad?" Ash asked.

Jill turned round to face Ash who was in slightly less pain and had more colour in her cheeks they smiled at each other

"He's just gone to make a call, he won't be long" replied Jill

"Can we go home now I'm feeling much better" asked Ash she didn't have to wait for a reply she knew by the face Jill had pulled as soon as she had mentioned the word home it was not possible

"Not until I've got the results back and besides we've got to wait for dad" replied Jill.

Meanwhile Gordon was sat at his desk in his office trying to get through to the specialist hoping he could shed some light on the situation. When he finally got through he was told to order the tests Jill had already ordered and if they all came back looking normal then unfortunately it looked like nerve damage in which case there's nothing more they can do only try and make it more bearable.

It was one of the risks of the operation but there's nothing to say the damage hadn't been done before. And there's nothing to say it wouldn't go away given time. Gordon thanked him for his help. He then pulled himself together and made his way back to his wife and daughter he decided not to say anything about the conversation he'd just had until the results came back he didn't want to discuss it in front of Ash and that would be the only time without her knowing something was up.


	22. Chapter 22

They didn't have long to wait normally they would of have had to wait until the morning but because it was the doctor's family everyone had only been to happy to stay on and help in any way possible. Two hours after arriving they pretty much had all the results back. Jill and Gordon had gone to his office to discuss these and that was when Gordon brought up the phone conversation that he had had. Well all the test results came back looking normal so it did look like nerve damage unfortunately.

"Gordon what if I caused this when I moved her" said Jill

"You didn't" replied Gordon

"How can you be so sure" replied Jill

"Because I am you didn't cause this, she didn't mention the pain beforehand" replied Gordon

"Now come on let's get Ash back home and comfortable we can tell her the news in the morning" added Gordon taking Jill's hand and walking down the corridor towards their daughter.

When they got back to the room they found Ash pacing up and down "Are you alright" Gordon asked

"Yes I'm fine, what is it" asked Ash

"It's late we'll talk about it in the morning, let's all just go home" said Gordon putting an arm around Ash

The following morning Gordon and Jill had gotten up as normal but they thought they would let Ash sleep in seeing as it had been a late night, they were in the study talking about Ash when she came downstairs they hadn't heard her so she stood out of eye sight but close enough that she could hear what they were talking about

"So just go through what the surgeon said again" said Jill

"He said to order the tests you had already if they came back looking normal, then the most likely cause was nerve damage" replied Gordon

"So it could've been me when I moved her" replied Jill

"No look at the notes there's no mention of pain until after the operation" replied Gordon

"So what do we do now" added Gordon

"Well we find out what causes the pain, when it happens and how to reduce the amount of pain when it does happen" replied Jill

Just then the sound of the boys coming down the stairs stopped the conversation, Ash quickly dashed into the kitchen and poured a glass of orange juice and was just reaching for a bowl for some cereal when Jill and Gordon walk into the kitchen followed by the boys

"Here I'll get that for you" said Jill

"No I'm fine thanks" replied Ash

"Don't be silly you must still be very tired, we weren't expecting you up yet" said Jill taking the bowl from Ash

"I'm fine really" said Ash taking the bowl back and trying to reach round Jill for the cereal

"Just sit down and let me do it for you" said Jill not moving

"You promised" said Ash putting the bowl down and picking up her glass and going out the back door into the chilly garden

"What's that all about" asked Jonathon

"Nothing, now what can I get for you two" replied Jill

Once she had gotten breakfast ready for Tom and Jonathon and was about to sit down Gordon who had been sat there quietly reading the paper with a cup of tea said "She's had enough time go and do what you do best" said Gordon he then gave her hand a squeeze and smiled

Jill walked outside to the table where Ash was sat

"Ash, sweetheart, I'm sorry, please come inside, it's cold out here" said Jill whilst taking a seat next to her

"you promised" replied Ash

"I know, and one day you will understand, it's my job as your mother to protect and look after you and I haven't done a very good job lately" replied Jill

"I'm sorry too, I haven't exactly made it very easy recently" replied Ash, shivering

"Come on let's go inside and get warmed up, I'll make us a nice cup of tea and you can have your breakfast" replied Jill getting up

"O.k" replied Ash, they both made their way inside

Ash got her cereal and sat down while Jill made the drinks when they were done she put them on the table and placed a hand on Ash's forehead

"That's better your starting to warm up now" Jill said she then sat down

"Ash we need to talk" said Gordon

"It's alright I know" replied Ash

"How" asked Jill

"I heard you talking, Dad's right it's not your fault" replied Ash taking a sip of tea

"You were listening in to our private conversation" said Gordon angrily

"No I heard you talking when I came down the stairs, you only stopped when you heard the boys coming down, that's not my fault" replied Ash

"Don't be so cheeky, go up to your room" replied Gordon

Ash got up and took her cup of tea

"Gordon" said Jill

"Don't bother mum" said Ash going up stairs to her room and shutting the door behind her she then put some music on and sat in front of the door she didn't want anyone coming in she didn't feel she could bite her tongue if anyone came to talk to her. He had made her so mad

It felt like half an hour had past but it had only been about ten minutes, Ash had not seen or heard from any one. She was starting to get achy sat on the floor so she decided to move over to the bed. She was bored of being stuck here every day the only times she had left the house since she had come home had been to go to hospital appointments, she decided to go for a walk she packed what use to be her school bag with a sketch pad and pencils, the book she was reading at the moment and her purse, she then put on her trainers and coat and went downstairs.

She could hear them all talking it sounded like Jill and the boys were ganging up on Gordon, trying to convince him he had been too harsh on her, she left the note she had scribbled down by the phone and quickly and quietly went out the front door.


	23. Chapter 23

She went to the bus stop down the road and got the bus into town, she then went and sat on the front reading she was finding it hard to concentrate on the words, so she put the book away and started to walk along the beach front which was getting a bit busier now it was warming up a bit, Ash stopped to take her coat off when she heard her name being called, she looked in the direction it had come from and saw a group of her friends sat on the beach a few yards ahead, she decided to walk over

"Hi guy's" said Ash

"Hi Ash, how are you" asked Emily motioning for Ash to sit down and join them

"I'm fine, just fed up, what about you lot" replied Ash sitting down

For the next couple of hours they helped Ash catch up with everything that had happened since they had last seen her, a couple of weeks ago. It felt good to be treated like normal to join in with conversations and to have a laugh and joke. She looked at her watch the next bus was in half an hour she would have to get a move on if she was going to get it and get home before the time she had put on her note she would be in enough trouble as it was. She said her goodbyes and planned to see them at the weekend, it shouldn't be too hard it was the weekend at least one of her parents would be working, She got to the bus just in time and climbed on.

Meanwhile back at the Ormerod residence after Gordon had admitted maybe he had been a little harsh, it wasn't like they had caught her listening in she had already been in the kitchen and was trying to get her breakfast. He went upstairs to apologise he knocked on her door and when there was no answer opened the door to find the room empty, the half drunk cold cup of tea stood on her desk next to a note pad and pen.

Next he checked the bathroom which was also empty, then he checked the other bedrooms calling for Ash. Each time the room was empty the panic set in a little more. "Jill" said Gordon his voice starting to waver

"Yes" replied Jill still none the wiser

"Is Ash down there with you" Gordon asked

"No, just let me check the front room" replied Jill, she went to check while Gordon made his way downstairs. They met in the hallway Jill shook her head

"Well, she's not upstairs either" said Gordon

"She's not outside" said Tom

"What's going on" said Katie coming out of the study

"Is Ash with you" asked Jill

"No, why" asked Katie

"We can't find Ash" said Gordon

"I heard someone go out the front door" replied Katie

"When, why didn't you say something" replied Gordon

"I don't know about half an hour ago" replied Katie "I'm sorry" she added

"It's alright, it's not your fault, you weren't to know, is it Gordon" replied Jill

"No, I'm sorry Katie" replied Gordon giving Katie a hug

Jill went over to the phone and found the note which brought back memories of the time before she couldn't bring herself to read it. Tom took the note from her "It says gone for a walk, don't worry be back by lunchtime, Ash" Tom read

"Shall we go out looking for her" asked Jonathon

"No leave it until lunchtime, otherwise it looks like we don't trust" replied Jill

Jill went to the front room and was pacing up and down every now and again she would stand staring out the window when she heard a car or a bus. One of the children bought her a cup of tea but she couldn't tell you which one what with all the thoughts that were going round in her head.

Finally at about half eleven she saw Ash nervously walking towards the house

"She's here everyone act normal" shouted Jill sitting in the chair and picking up the nearest thing to read. Five minutes had past and they still hadn't heard the front door open, Jill got up and looked out the window, Ash was in the front garden lent against the car. Jill thought to herself give her a few more minutes then if she hasn't come in I'll go out to her.

"Where is she, I thought you said she was here" asked Katie

"She's just outside" Jill replied pointing to the cars

"Do you want me to talk to her" asked Katie looking at were Jill was pointing

"No, give her a few minutes" replied Jill

Ash was stood outside the walk had done some good but she was still mad, it seemed like everyone had forgotten that she was the one that had to live with this, and they were just talking about her like she was another patient, she wasn't ready to face any of them yet but she had promised to be back, and she knew that they would be going crazy as it was. She was away with her thoughts, getting ready for the barrage of questions that were bound to come her way that she didn't hear the front door open or see Katie come out.

"Ash are you alright, I know Dad can be a bit full on sometimes" Katie said

"I'm fine, I just needed to be on my own for a bit" replied Ash

"Are they mad" Ash asked

"No just worried, mums been climbing the walls and looking out the window every five minutes" replied Katie

"Great" replied Ash

"They're just worried about you, we all are" replied Katie

"Come on let's go inside" Katie added

"You go on in, I'll be there in a minute" replied Ash

"Are you sure" Asked Katie

"Yeah I'm sure, please" replied Ash

Katie went on in, Ash stayed outside for a few more minutes she needed someone to talk to, she usually went to Jill but she felt she couldn't talk about this with her without hurting her feelings, and there was no way any of her friends would be able to help, and there was absolutely no way she was going to talk to sister Brigid she would love it too much. Maybe she could talk to Katie, she had just come to ask if she was o.k. She shook that thought from her head and made her way indoors.

"Where have you been, what did you think you were doing" asked Gordon

"Gordon, enough" said Jill

"Yes I've had enough of her behaviour, your grounded until I say so" replied Gordon

"Gordon, can we talk about this" said Jill

Ash just went straight upstairs without saying a word, Gordon and Jill just stood watching her

"Gordon, how is that normal" said Jill


	24. Chapter 24

Ash went up to her room and threw her bag onto her bed followed by her coat and shoes, she then shut her door and sat in front of it, she knew they would be mad but not this mad, while growing up she had seen them telling the others off but they never seemed as angry. She pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her head on top of her knees and wrapped her arms around herself, she then sobbed until she had no energy left. She didn't know how long she had been there when she was bought out of her thoughts when there was a knock at the door whoever it was didn't wait for a reply they tried to get in but Ash was blocking the way.

"Ash are you o.k. dinners ready, mums been calling you" said Jonathon

"I'm fine, tell her I'm not hungry" replied Ash

"You had better come down you know she won't take no for an answer" replied Jonathon

"I'm not coming down, just leave me" replied Ash

Jonathon tried to get in again but Ash was still in the way, so he went downstairs and joined the others at the table

"She's not coming down" said Jonathon

"Well we'll just see about that" replied Gordon getting up to go upstairs

"I'll go" said Katie getting up and going to the hallway, Jonathon followed her saying he needed to get a drink

"Katie, I didn't say in front of mum, but she's sat in front of the door, you can't get in" He whispered

"O.k. thanks" replied Katie going up the stairs and knocked softly on the door

"Ash, open up" said Katie

"No" replied Ash

"If you don't Dads going to come up here" replied Katie

Ash moved away from the door and opened it, Katie went inside she saw Ash was looking pale and had been crying.

"Ash are you alright, are you in pain" asked Katie

"A little" replied Ash

"Is that why you don't want to come downstairs" asked Katie

Ash shrugged her shoulders "I don't want them to see" she said

"Why" asked Katie

"They've been treating me like a baby since" Ash broke off

"Come down, sit next to me" said Katie

"I don't know" said Ash

"Well if you don't they will only be on your case more, I should know I've been there" said Katie

Ash decided Katie had a point so agreed, Katie took her hand and led her downstairs, Ash didn't make eye contact with anyone but she knew that they were all watching her. Gordon went to say something but Jill gave him the look that said don't say anything. They sat in silence for a while before Katie asked Jill a question and one of the boys asked Gordon a question, the conversation started to flow again. All the time Ash just sat not taking her eyes off her plate, Jill was watching her out of the corner of her eye wishing, and hoping for a sign or Katie would say something to give her an idea of what was said upstairs.

When they had all finished Ash cleared the table and started on the washing up it was her turn she was on her own in the kitchen but she could her them quizzing Katie about what had gone on upstairs, Katie had given nothing away there wasn't really anything to tell but they weren't giving up that easily.

"I'll just go and give Ash a hand" said Katie

"Not until you tell us what's been going on" replied Gordon

"There's nothing to tell" replied Katie

"Well something's going on" replied Jill

"You will have to ask her, she's not said anything to us" replied Jonathon

Katie got up to go and give Ash a hand

"Sit down, and tell us please" said Gordon

"There is nothing to tell" replied Katie trying to leave but Gordon blocked the door

"We know you lot better than that tell us the truth" replied Gordon

By this stage Ash had done the washing up and had started on the drying up she could hear all the shouting going on and it was all about her she threw the tea towel on the table and opened the back door she thought about running there and then thinking how far she could get before they noticed, but she had no money down here otherwise she would of instead she took the bin out but before she could shut the door the wind took it banging it shut.

Meanwhile Katie was trying to get past Gordon

"What was that" asked Jill

"The back door" replied Gordon going in the direction

"O.k. she said she was in a little pain" said Katie

"Why didn't you tell us" replied Gordon while they all walked to the kitchen

"She asked us not to and it's not our place" replied Tom

Ash was none the wiser that her parents knew and was walking back to the house she walked back through the door to be confronted by all the Ormerods.

"Ash sweetheart sit down" said Jill

"No I'm fine" replied Ash moving towards the table and picking up the tea towel

"Where's the pain" asked Gordon

"You told them" said Ash looking at Katie and throwing the tea towel back down

"Don't blame Katie" said Jill

"I don't" replied Ash leaving the room and going upstairs

"Aisling Moria Ormerod get back here now" shouted Gordon

But Ash didn't stop she didn't even say anything she just carried on going she could hear them talking behind her

"Right you lot start talking and start talking quick" said Gordon


	25. Chapter 25

Ash heard the scraping of chairs against the kitchen floor then heard the others telling everything they had seen or talked about with her. Which wasn't much she had been careful with what she said to people most of her secrets were written in a book which she kept locked away, so there wasn't much to tell which didn't give her much time either to decide what to do next.

She got her book out and was writing her feelings down:

I had that bad dream again it starts with being on the cliff top and falling and then I'm there running away from S.B. and then it all goes black what does it mean?

I feel I can't stay here much longer I have to leave if only until things calm down a bit and get back to normal, whatever that is these days. They treat me differently now like i'm a kid and talk about me like I'm a just another patient or not even there. Maybe they would of been better off if I hadn't of survived at least I wouldn't be pulling the family apart, I don't seem to be able to do anything right all I seem to be able to do is make everyone really an

She stopped mid sentence they were coming upstairs she dumped the book under her pillow and curled up on her bed wiping away the tears that never seemed to stop pouring these days there was a knock at the door but they didn't wait for a reply they just all came in

"We've been talking" said Gordon

Ash looked up "It's alright I understand it's for the best" replied Ash

"What is" asked Gordon, Jill looked just as puzzled

"Guy's do you want to leave us for a bit" asked Jill to the other three

"Why do they have to leave they already know" said Ash

"We think there has been a miss understanding and it would be better if it was just the three of us" replied Gordon pulling out the chair from the desk and taking a seat, Jill sat on the end of the bed and the others went back downstairs

"Well like I said we've been talking...Ash" said Gordon

Ash had gotten up and was making a dash for the bathroom Jill and Gordon followed

"You're not getting out of this" said Gordon

"I don't think she's trying go and get my bag" replied Jill following Ash into the bathroom and holding her hair back. After Ash had finished throwing up she sat lent against the wall completely exhausted she felt the warmth of her mum as she wrapped her arms around her she felt comforted and for the first time since she had been home she didn't want her to let her go

"Do you think you can stand" Jill said

Ash nodded she stood wobbly and using the sink to steady herself managed to brush her teeth

"It's alright I won't let you go" reassured Jill

"Let's get you back to bed" said Gordon

They got Ash back into bed and checked her over they put it down to pure exhaustion they told her to keep her fluid levels up and were going out the door

"No don't go" Ash said

"Ash sweetheart you need to rest" replied Jill

"But you need to talk" replied Ash stifling a yawn

"You need to rest we can talk later" replied Gordon

"Please don't go" pleaded Ash

Jill and Gordon just looked at each other it reminded them of when she was younger none of the children had been really clingy but when they were really Ill they never wanted them to leave them, they thought those days were long gone none of the children had really asked for them to stay for as long as they can remember, Jill sat on the bed and took Ash's hand, while Gordon said he would be back once he had gotten her a glass of water

"Sorry" mumbled Ash as she fell asleep

"It's alright sshh" whispered Jill

Gordon came back up with the glass of water

"Is she asleep" he whispered

"Yes" Jill whispered back

Gordon sat down in the chair and took Jill's hand they sat there for half an hour then tiptoed out of the room and went back downstairs where the others were waiting, they had their drinks and were talking about their plans for the weekend after what had happened today it was meant to be a nice day for everyone but as usual it never quite work out as they planned

"NOOOOOOOOOOO"

"Ash" Jill jumped up running up the stairs followed by Gordon and the others

Ash was still asleep

"Ash, sweetheart it's alright we're here" said Jill soothingly taking her hand looking nervously at Gordon who was stood in the doorway

"It's alright go to bed all of you" Gordon said to the others and then taking a seat next to Jill

"Why don't you go to bed you look exhausted I'll stay here" He said

"No I'll stay you go and get some rest" Jill replied Gordon was going to say something but Jill got there first

"You're on call tomorrow"

"O.k. but if you need anything just call me" He said getting up and giving her a kiss "Goodnight"


	26. Chapter 26

Ash had a restless night Jill managed to get a few hours sleep in between Ash's screams everyone was a bit later getting up, Ash was the first awake she saw Jill was still asleep and didn't want to move and wake her it was her fault she had had such a bad nights sleep Jill had sat in the chair and held Ash's hand all through the night she had rested her head on her other arm on the bed and fallen asleep it wasn't long before Jill woke up her neck was starting to ache

"Morning" Ash said with a quizzical look on her face

"morning, how do you feel" asked Jill

"O.k. why are you here" asked Ash

"You were Ill and you had a bad dream" replied Jill

"sorry" replied Ash

"Do you want to talk about it" asked Jill getting up and stretching

"No it's o.k. you and Dad wanted to talk to me though" replied Ash

"Well let's go down we can talk over breakfast" replied Jill

"Is Dad up then" asked Ash

"Did someone call me" said Gordon poking his head around the door

"Morning" he smiled

"Morning" replied Jill and Ash moving towards the door they walked to the kitchen in silence Gordon closed the door behind them, the conversation didn't start until they had all gotten their breakfast

"So what we were going to talk about yesterday" started Gordon

"We talked to the others, they didn't really tell us anything that we didn't know already" Gordon carried on

"But you need to tell us if you are in pain so we can help you" he continued

"Sorry" interrupted Ash

"Let me finish, Don't you ever go somewhere without telling anyone again, you had us worried sick do you know that" said Gordon

Ash just nodded and looked down at her bowl

"Ash why did you do it" asked Jill

"I just was so cross" said Ash

"That's no excuse" interrupted Gordon

"Let her finish, carry on" said Jill

"Well whatever I do is wrong and I was so mad with you... I just needed some time on my own but I knew if I asked one of you would come along to make sure" said Ash

"That's not good enough" replied Gordon

"SEE" shouted Ash getting up and going towards the door

"I open up and tell the truth and it's still wrong"

"Ash come back it's just hard for us to understand" Jill tried to reason

"No, I think it's best if we do what you had planned last night" Ash replied

"What's that" Gordon asked

"That I go away for a bit, until it's back to some kind of normal" replied Ash turning and running up the stairs not waiting for a response she got out her diary and was scribbling down everything that had just gone on while also making a list of everything she would need to go away with for a while. Meanwhile Gordon and Jill were talking downstairs

"Gordon I can't let her go what if she never comes back" said Jill

"Maybe it's not such a bad idea" replied Gordon

"No she had a tough time dealing with what sister Brigid said about her real parents not wanting her I don't think she could ever cope with the thought that we don't want her either" Jill said

"Well what if we all go away on holiday for a bit get away from here" replied Gordon

"Do you think it's possible" Jill asked apprehensively

"Give me a few hours to get things sorted" replied Gordon getting up and going to the study

"Do you want me to do anything" asked Jill getting up

"No-no" replied Gordon

Jill went upstairs and knocked softly on Ash's door

"Come in" replied Ash forgetting her diary was on the desk

"Are you alright" asked Jill

"Yeah" retorted Ash

"Truthfully" asked Jill coming in and noticing the diary open on the desk

"What's this" she asked pointing at the desk

"Nothing, it's private" said Ash moving towards it but it was too late Jill had it in her hands

"Please don't read it, it's private" pleaded Ash

"Well do you want to tell me what's in it" replied Jill

"No" replied Ash

"Well I'll just read it then" replied Jill who was saying something she had promised herself many years ago that if she ever had kids that she would never read their private diary because when her parents had done it, it had made her so angry that she could never trust them again fully after that for a long time and she promised herself from that day that she would never do it.

"Please don't read it" pleaded Ash

"One last chance are you going to tell me what's in here or am I going to have to read it" replied Jill

"Please don't make me do this" pleaded Ash

"Right you've had your chance" replied Jill walking towards the door

"You read it and I'll never talk to you again" retorted Ash

"Fine at least I'll know how to help you" replied Jill calmly going towards her bedroom

"I won't be here to help" shouted Ash slamming her door shut


	27. Chapter 27

Gordon who had been on the phone came running up the stairs

"What's all the noise about" he asked

"Mum's taken her diary and Ash has threatened to leave if she reads it" replied Tom

"Right where are they" replied Gordon calmly

"Ash is in there and mum went to your room" replied Tom

"Right don't let your sister leave the house, while I talk to mum" replied Gordon going towards his room

Meanwhile Ash was pacing up and down in her room wanting to leave and get as far away as possible but at the same time she just wanted to tell Jill everything. She then went and opened her door to be greeted by Tom, Jonathon and Katie

"Dad said you can't leave" said Jonathon

"He said I can't leave the house, not my room" replied Ash

"Please don't do this" pleaded Katie

"I'm only going downstairs to get a glass of water to take these with" replied Ash

Shutting her door behind her

"Let me get it for you" replied Tom

"No I can get it myself thank you" replied Ash making her way past them and making her way downstairs

She could hear them behind her discussing if they should tell mum and dad that she had come out of her room

"What for a glass of water they would really love us then, why don't you go with her and I'll stay here and tell dad when he's finished talking to mum" reasoned Katie

"Why do we have to go with her" asked Jonathon

"Because if she makes a break for it you are the fastest out of all of us to catch her" replied Katie

"O.k. but don't be too long, something's not right" replied Tom

While all of this was going on Gordon was trying to calm Jill down who was in hysterics she never thought it would go that badly

"Jill what happened" asked Gordon soothingly

"I went in to her room and found this open on her desk" said Jill between tears

"And then I told her I would read it if she didn't tell me what was in it and she kicked off, ohh my god what have I done" she continued

"It's alright we can sort it, have you read it" asked Gordon

"No, I couldn't bring myself too, I know what it's like to have some one read your private thoughts, I thought she would open up and I've just pushed her away, how can I fix this" asked Jill

"Give me the diary, I'll go and talk to Ash try to calm her down and get her to come to you" replied Gordon calmly taking the diary and giving Jill a hug and a peck on the cheek

Gordon came out the room to find only Katie in the hallway

"Dad she went downstairs the boys went with her, how's mum" Katie asked

"Beating herself up, can you take her a cup of tea up" asked Gordon walking down the stairs

"Yes of course, what's going on, can I help" asked Katie

"No, it's best if no-one else is involved" replied Gordon walking into the kitchen

Ash made to get up

"Sit down young lady we need a chat, boy's can you leave us alone for a bit" asked Gordon

Ash sat back down, the boys left the room and Katie made the drinks

"I believe this is yours, do you want to explain" asked Gordon

"No, just ask mum" replied Ash trying to take it back

"She hasn't read it, she is beside herself that she has even done this" replied Gordon

They sat in silence for awhile

"So I'll ask again do you want to explain" asked Gordon

Ash took a sip of tea while pondering what to say

"No, it's private" replied Ash

"Well not unlike your mum I will actually keep it and read it because I don't care if you hate me if it means we get our Ash back" stated Gordon

"If you read it I'm not your Ash anymore" replied Ash

"Just think what that would do to your mum, she was blaming herself for weeks last time I don't think she would get over it again" replied Gordon

"I'm not the one forcing someone to tell them things that they couldn't tell anyone so they wrote it down to make sense of it and to find the solution to their problems" replied Ash

"Why don't you try we could help" replied Gordon

"Because I don't want your help, I just want to be left alone something's are best kept secret" replied Ash

"Right well I'll keep this and you've got until tea time tonight to make up your mind then I'll have some bedtime reading, now you are to go upstairs and say sorry to your mum and we're take it from there no arguments" stated Gordon

Ash got up and put her cup in the sink she then went upstairs and knocked softly on her parents door she could hear Katie talking to their mum

"Come in" said Jill

Ash opened the door but didn't enter

"I'm sorry about before" Ash said from the doorway

"I'm sorry too, come here" Jill said while motioning for Ash to come in

Ash went in and gave her mum a hug

"I'm so sorry I should never have done that, please forgive me" whispered Jill into Ash's ear

"Nothing to forgive" said Ash

"Can I go out for a walk to clear my head" asked Ash

"How long are you going to be and where are you going" asked Jill

"I don't know" replied Ash truthfully

"Then no, not unless someone can go with you" replied Jill

"O.k. what if I say along the beach and be back by dinner time" replied Ash

"That's fine if someone can take you and pick you up at a certain time" replied Jill

"Well I'm going in to town I can take you and pick you up a couple of hours later" said Katie

"No forget it" replied Ash walking out the room


	28. Chapter 28

Ten minutes later Ash was in her room she had her sketches laid out on the floor there was a knock at the door Katie popped her head around the door

"I'm leaving in five if you have changed your mind" she said while looking at what Ash was doing

"What's that" she asked

"It was a present for mum and dad, now it's just a load of rubbish" she said with a pair of scissors in her hand she picked up one of the sketches and cut the picture so she was no longer in it

Katie moved over "Ash stop it, just stop it please" she pleaded picking up the other sketches and trying to take the scissors

"Just leave me alone" sobbed Ash

"No, I'm not going to let you do this" replied Katie

"Don't you have somewhere more important to be" asked Ash

"Nothing is more important than family" replied Katie finally having got the scissors and the drawings

"Please just leave me alone" said Ash sitting down on the bed holding her side

"Sorry Ash did I hurt you" replied Katie

"I'm fine please, I just want to be on my own" replied Ash laying on her bed and pulling her knees up to her chest trying to get comfortable

"I'll go and get mum" replied Katie

"No, I'm fine, I don't want anyone" replied Ash

"What about these" ask Katie

"Just throw them" replied Ash

Katie took them but put them in a safe place in her room, she knew Ash might change her mind once she had calmed down a bit, she then made her way downstairs and into the garden Jill and Gordon were sat at the table deep in conversation

"Mum" said Katie as she approached, Jill could tell something was up from her tone

"What is it" asked Jill

"Ash" replied Katie before she could say anything else

"What now" snapped Gordon

"Nothing I was just going to say she's not coming with me so you would know" replied Katie

"Sorry Katie I didn't mean to snap" replied Gordon

"See you later" replied Katie she hated lying to her parents but she knew with the mood Gordon was in she would be doing Ash no favours if she told them now so she tried a different way to talk to Jill

"Mum can I still borrow your car" asked Katie

"Yes of course, you know where the keys are" replied Jill

This was not going how Katie had hoped

"They're not there" replied Katie

"Well maybe they're still in my bag I'll go and have a look for you" replied Jill getting up and going indoors

"Thank's mum" replied Katie glad something was going right she followed Jill in

Jill was in the hallway and noticed the keys where they normally were on the table by the phone

"What's going on" she turned around asking Katie

"I need to talk to you but dad's in one of those moods with Ash I didn't want to make things worse" replied Katie

"Okay" replied Jill they moved into the office when they were both sat down Katie began

"I went in to Ash to double check she hadn't changed her mind and well I don't know how to say this without upsetting someone" said Katie

"It's alright, go ahead" replied Jill

"Well she was sat with a load of sketches laid out on the floor and a pair of scissors" Katie said and she paused

"What for the present she is doing for us?" replied Jill

"Yes only she said she wasn't doing it anymore and was cutting herself out of the pictures" said Katie

"Ohh no" replied Jill as she put her hand to her mouth

"It's o.k. she had only done one by the time I had managed to get the rest and the scissors they are all safely in my room, but she was in a lot of pain when I left her but she told me not to tell you she was curled up on her bed" said Katie

"O.k. thank you I will go and check on her and don't worry you've done the right thing none of this is your fault" said Jill getting up and giving Katie a cuddle

"But what if I hurt her" replied Katie

"You haven't I promise now I want you to go out and enjoy yourself" replied Jill

"But I can't" replied Katie

"Yes you can, if you don't she'll know you said something" replied Jill

"Don't worry I've got it all under control" added Jill

"O.k. I'll see you later" replied Katie

"And Katie thank you" replied Jill

Jill gave it five minutes after Katie had left then went upstairs she knocked softly on Ash's bedroom door when there was no reply

"Ash i'm just making a drink do you want one" Jill asked as she opened the door she didn't wait for a reply when she saw Ash curled up on her bed just as Katie had described she went over to her

"Ash sweetheart" said Jill

Ash lifted her head

"No thanks I'm fine" replied Ash

"Where does it hurt" asked Jill

"No where I'm fine" replied Ash

"Don't lie to me, let me have a look" replied Jill

"I'll be fine in a minute, just leave it" replied Ash

"Is this about before" asked Jill

"No, just leave it please" replied Ash

"I'll get you some pain relief" replied Jill

"I took some earlier" replied Ash

"How long ago" queried Jill

"I don't know about arrgghh" said Ash as she tried to move to look at the clock

"Ash sweetheart, I'm going to take you in to have a look at" said Jill clearly worried

"No, I don't want to it was about half an hour ago" said Ash

"Right well we all have to do things we don't want to, do you think you can walk downstairs" replied Jill sternly

"I'll try" replied Ash knowing she had lost this fight

Jill went to help her

"I don't want your help" replied Ash stubbornly Ash managed to get to her feet but Jill noticed she wasn't standing up straight she was protecting her tummy she was also using what she could to keep herself balanced.

Ash got out on to the landing there was a sharp surge of pain and she slid down the wall she was using as support ending up in a heap on the floor

"Ash" said Jill running over to her

"I'm fine" replied Ash trying to get up in vain

"Sweetheart we all need help sometimes, it doesn't mean you've failed" said Jill helping Ash get to her feet

Meantime Gordon was thinking Jill had been a long time and had come in to see what was going on

"Jill" Gordon shouted seeing she was not in the kitchen

"Gordon up here quick" replied Jill

"Whats going on" replied Gordon before he saw Jill and Ash at the top of the stairs

"Ash is in a lot of pain" replied Jill

"Ash right o.k." replied Gordon as he tried to take in what was just said

"She told me and she also took pain relief half an hour ago we were trying to get downstairs" stated Jill

"I am here I can talk for myself, I'm not one of your patient handovers" stated Ash

"And" said Ash

"Yes sorry" said Jill cutting Ash short

They managed between them to get Ash downstairs while Gordon was getting the car

"Why did you tell dad I told you I was in pain" asked Ash

"Because there's no point in having an argument about that" replied Jill

"Besides I would like to think you would've come to get us" added Jill

Ash had got to the front door but she was beginning to slow down

"I'm sorry I can't go any further" replied Ash

"Yes you can I'm here, we will do it together" replied Jill tightening her grip on Ash

They got her to the car safely she felt every bump and jolt along the way when they arrived Gordon got out the car and ran inside to get a wheelchair

"Mum, I'm sorry" said Ash

"There's nothing to be sorry about" replied Jill

"No not just this everything" replied Ash

"It's alright, I just wish you trusted us more to talk to us about whatever is going on in there" replied Jill pointing at Ash's head

By this time Gordon had come back with a wheelchair


	29. Chapter 29

They got Ash safely onto a hospital bed in the casualty room she automatically bought her knees up and was trying to get comfortable Gordon and Jill were discussing what to do next they gave her some strong medication and then sent her for x-rays, when Ash was on her way back she heard them debating the next step as an operation to have a look at what was going on because all the tests kept coming back all the same inconclusive.

Ash was back on the bed the medication was starting to work she felt so tired she felt she could sleep for days she hadn't been able to sleep properly because of the pain or the nightmare or both she was just starting to nod off when sister Brigid came rushing in

"OHHH, what's wrong" said Sister

"We are just waiting for the test results" replied Gordon they still found after all this time she still listened to Gordon better

"Why did no one tell me" replied Sister clearly worried moving over towards Ash

"Because I don't want you here" replied Ash turning over so her back was now facing Sister

"Now why would you want such a thing as that" replied Sister trying to take Ash's hand

Ash got up from the bed, Jill and Gordon moved closer to try and get her back on the bed

"No not while she's here this is all her fault" stated Ash

"Well now how can that be" replied Sister

Ash went to say something but Jill got there first

"Maybe it would be best if you waited outside just until Ash has calmed down" said Jill

"No she needs me" replied Sister

Jill looked to Gordon for support

"We could do with a little space, I will come and get you as soon as possible" tried Gordon

"Well if you think it's for the best Doctor" replied Sister

With that she left

"Sorry" said Ash getting back on the bed

"It's not us you need to apologise too" replied Gordon

They were interrupted by a nurse

"Sorry doctor Ormerod there's an emergency and you're the doctor on call" the nurse said

"Yes, yes" replied Gordon looking at Jill

"Yes, go we'll be fine" replied Jill

With that Gordon grabbed his coat and left not noticing that Ash's diary had fallen out of his pocket in his rush.

Ash nodded off for about half an hour somewhere in that time matron had heard about her being here and had come to offer her assistance she could hear them chatting

"I don't know what else to do, she won't talk all I seem to be doing is pushing her away and Gordon's getting short tempered with her" said Jill

"Well don't forget she has to deal with this as well, she's probably blaming herself for everything that's going on and can't find a way out of it" replied Matron

"Well she did say something funny" replied Jill

"Yes" queried Matron

"That it would be better if she went away for a bit until it was more normal, and then earlier she said she was here she could talk for herself" replied Jill

"Have you been treating her differently" asked Matron

"I suppose I have been watching her more closely, there's always been someone close by and I've found it easier to detach from her being in pain if I treat her more like a patient, Ohh no what have I done" replied Jill

"Nothing none of us wouldn't have done in the same situation, but you need to try and explain to Ash who is probably terrified of her future and what is happening to her and lashing out because at least you she her then" replied Matron

"Mum" said Ash when she couldn't see her

"It's alright I'm here sweetheart and look who came to see you" replied Jill wiping away tears

"Hello Ash" said Matron

"Hello" replied Ash

"Right you'll be alright here if I just chase up something's" said Jill clearly upset

"Yeah I'll be fine" replied Ash

Jill left them and went straight to her office she didn't like letting anyone seeing her crying matron had helped her see what was going on and she was beating herself up for not noticing it before

Meanwhile back with Ash

"So what's been going on you haven't been giving them a hard time have you" Asked Matron

"Well maybe they treat me differently, and I think it might be best if I wasn't around for a while" replied Ash

"You must never think like that, they love you very much, this has been very hard on them too you know" replied Matron

"I know, can you do me a favour" asked Ash

"Yes, I'll try" replied Matron with a smile

"Can you talk to mum can you tell her she can read this but I want you to be there to support her" said Ash

"I don't understand read what" said Matron

"It's alright mum will" replied Ash giving matron the diary that had fallen out of Gordon's coat pocket and been put on the side by one of the nurses

"When" Asked Matron

Ash took a deep breath then said "No time like the present"

"Why don't I go and get her then you can help clarify any queries" replied Matron

"Because I don't think I could take the look of disappointment on her face" replied Ash truthfully

"You could never disappoint them, you know that don't you" replied Matron

Because it had been a long time and no-one had come to see her sister Brigid thought she would pop her head in and see how everything was going

"Ohh hello matron how are you" said Sister clearly annoyed that matron was aloud in here and that there was no sign of either Jill or Gordon

"I'm good and how are you" asked Matron

"I'm grand I was just wondering if I could speak to Aisling" replied Sister

Ash shook her head and then seeing the book in Matrons hand said "Actually there's something really important we have to do then I'll come and see you" replied Ash gingerly getting off the bed

"Stay here, I'll go and get her" said Matron clearly worried Ash was pushing herself too hard

"No, I'm fine, let's do this before I change my mind" replied Ash

They were walking down the corridor in silence Ash was starting to slow down and use the wall more and more for support

"Maybe we should get you back to bed" said Matron

"No" replied Ash stubbornly

"Matron's right" said Sister who had been following them

"I said no" replied Ash turning around to face Sister

She turned back to carry on and realised Matron had gone on without her she was already at Jill's door.

Matron tapped lightly on Jill's door

"Come in" Jill said

Matron opened the door and said "She's as stubborn as you"

"What?" replied Jill

"Well she's trying to get here so you can read this" replied Matron waving the diary in the air

Jill got up from behind her desk and moved to the doorway

"Sorry doctor we tried to stop her" said Sister

"That's alright thank you" said Jill stepping up and taking Ash's arm

"Why are you so stubborn" Jill said to Ash

"I've no idea where she would get that from" said Matron with a chuckle even Jill had a little chuckle. Ash looked blankly from one to the other Matron must have seen this and decided to let her in on the little joke

"Your mother" replied Matron with a little nod of the head towards Jill to make her point even clearer. Ash gave a weak smile. They got Ash into one of the chairs, Matron sat next to her and Jill took her seat.

"Well what was all this for, what's so important it couldn't wait until I got back" asked Jill

"Well I was talking to Matron and well I realised a few things" said Ash

"She wanted me to give you this to read, and thought it best she was here to explain" stated Matron

"So why couldn't it wait, there's nothing more important than you, I don't want you pushing yourself too hard and making whatever this is even worse, do you understand me" said Jill

Ash nodded

"But this couldn't wait, I heard some of what you were talking about and when sister came in I realised this was more important because Katie was right" replied Ash

"Katie was right about what" Asked Jill

"She said nothing was more important than family" replied Ash

There was a knock at the door

"Come in" said Jill, It was Gordon back from the emergency

"Hello, what are you all doing in here" he queried

"And you should still be in bed" he said to Ash

"Yeah sorry this was more important" replied Ash

"What could be more important" asked Gordon

"I'll leave you three to this" said Matron

"No stay please" said Ash

Gordon pulled up a chair and Ash started to explain everything that was written down and for once things started to come together. Jill and Gordon were able to clear a few things up which helped some pages were not as easy to explain as others and she had to leave some bits out because it said what pictures she had drawn that day. It was a good job Matron was there for those bits as she could verify that what was written down was nothing for them to worry about, that was one of the reasons she didn't want them to read it she was just hoping Katie hadn't actually taken her at her word and thrown them away. Ash made a promise not to keep anything like this a secret again and Jill and Gordon said they would try to treat her, the same as the others but they couldn't promise anything. Ash knew that was the best she was going to get but now she understood why they had been treating her differently and talking the way they had it didn't seem as bad. They all promised to talk about anything that was worrying them with the others.

There was a knock at the door

"Come in" said Jill

"Here's the results you were waiting for" replied the Nurse handing them over

"Thank-you" replied Jill taking the results and placing them on her desk

"Right let's get you back to bed then we can have a look and see what's going on" said Gordon

"It's alright I can make my own way there" replied Ash

"I don't think so you could barely make it here" replied Jill

"I'll be fine I promise I feel a bit better" replied Ash getting up she stood as straight as she could which wasn't much but it was better than before

"Will you do as you are told for once" replied Gordon, both he and Jill getting up and moving to her side

"O.k. but can you let me try it on my own, if I need help I'll ask" replied Ash

"We'll be right behind you" replied Jill looking at Gordon telling him to let her try this

Matron made to get up

"Actually matron would you mind staying we would like to run something by you" Asked Jill

"No problem" said Matron sitting back down

Ash was about halfway back to her bed when they met Sister in the hallway Ash took Jill's hand

"I'm sorry about before I said something's that weren't nice, I'm so sorry" said Ash to Sister

"That's alright we all say things when were in pain" replied Sister

"Do we know what's wrong yet" Sister asked Gordon

"No we've just got the results back, we're getting this one back to bed then we can have a look at them" replied Gordon

They got Ash back onto the bed she automatically pulled her knees up

"Try and get some rest, we'll be back as soon as possible but if you need us just tell the nurse and they will come and get us" Said Jill placing a kiss on her forehead

"O.k." replied Ash

Turning on her side so her back was facing the door she closed her eyes and fell to sleep Sister had stayed with her and was watching her sleeping


	30. Chapter 30

Meanwhile Jill and Matron were sat in Jill's office looking at the results Gordon had gone to make them a drink and get a couple of books Jill had asked for that were still in his office.

Gordon came back in with everything he had been asked to get

"Sorry matron for wasting all your time" said Jill

"I'm just happy I could help" replied Matron

"There doesn't seem to be anything showing up on any of these" replied Gordon passing them back to Jill

"What about the positions of the screws" asked Matron

"I haven't been looking at that" said Gordon taking the films back

"Why didn't we think of that" asked Jill

"Yes matron your right one of the screws is slightly in the wrong position" said Gordon

"What now" he asked Jill

"Well now we know what's causing the pain, unfortunately there's nothing we can do about it we've just got to hope it will get better with time" replied Jill

"There must be something" said Matron

"All we can do is give her stronger medication when it happens so she doesn't have to keep coming in here and try and find out what triggers it or we could remove it we would have to check first" replied Jill

Meanwhile back in the emergency room Ash was having a nightmare again

"Mum, mum please mum" said Ash

"It's alright I'm here" said sister

"Shall I go and get Dr Weatherill" asked the nurse

"No, it's alright their busy and besides I'm here" said Sister

She turned her attention back to Ash

"Sssshhhhh, it's alright I'm here" said Sister

"mummmmm" said Ash

With that the nurse disobeyed Sister's order and left to get Dr Weatherill

She knocked on the Dr's door

"Come in" said Jill

"What's wrong" said Jill the second she saw the nurse getting up

"It's Ash she's asleep but she's calling for you, I would of come sooner but Sister told me not to" said the nurse

"Right tell me everything" said Gordon

The nurse told them everything that had happened they had just got the whole story when they arrived at the emergency room

"Right don't over react, there might be a plausible explanation" said Jill to Gordon

"Mummm" screamed Ash

Jill ran over

"It's alright baby girl" she whispered in Ash's ear and brushing her hair

"It's alright we're here" she added taking a seat that Gordon had pulled up and taking her hand

"Why didn't you come to get us" asked Gordon

"Well you were busy and I was here" replied Sister

"But she's screaming for her mum and you just ignored it would you do it if it was any other patient and their parents were in the hospital" asked Gordon

"No, I'm so sorry doctor" replied Sister getting up

"Well no harm done, why don't you stay for a bit" said Jill

"No, I think I've over stayed my welcome already and besides I've got lot's to do, I'll see you tomorrow" replied Sister walking towards the door

"I don't get it how can you stay so calm and say no harm done" said Gordon

"There's no point in making her feel worse, besides Ash is still asleep, she's not going to know any different" replied Jill trying to see it from both sides and feeling rather sorry for Sister

"Besides she knows that Ash wanted us, she's calmed right down as soon as she knew we were here, and Ash said she always was treating her differently because she wanted to be her mum, and Ash has just told her without even knowing it that she is not her mum and never will be in her eyes we are her parents, how would you be feeling right now in her shoes" said Jill

"O.k. sorry" said Gordon hitting his own hand

Just then Matron came in

"What's happening I just saw Sister running away crying" she asked

"I'd better go and apologise" replied Gordon going out the door

"Noooo" whimpered Ash

"Sssshhhhh, ssssshhhh, it's alright" said Jill

Ash quietened down and Jill turned her attention back to Matron

"I'm sorry we've wasted so much of your time" said Jill

"It's no bother you know where I am any time" replied Matron

"Well about that what are you doing tomorrow" asked Jill

"Nothing why" asked Matron

"We've got a day out planned I would love it if you would agree to come" replied Jill

"I don't know I think you need to spend time as a family" replied Matron

"You're as good as family and besides it would mean a lot to me if you came" replied Jill

"Alright what time and where" replied Matron

"We'll pick you up around ten" replied Jill

Matron could see the relief in Jill's face knowing that she was going with them

"Are you sure" asked Matron

"Yes, I will phone you if the plans change" replied Jill

"Well I better be on my way, I'll see you tomorrow" replied Matron

"Yes and thank you again we never would of thought of that if it wasn't for you" replied Jill

And with that matron left, Jill was on her own with Ash for about fifteen minutes she was starting to wonder where Gordon had gotten too when he walked back through the door with a cup of tea for her.

"How is she" he asked

"Still asleep, Matrons gone, I've asked her to come along tomorrow, how did you get on" said Jill

"Yes, I saw her in the corridor, and I've had a long chat with Sister you were right, she said she's going away for a few days to clear her head and she will pop in and see us when she's back" replied Gordon

"How could we have let it get so bad" asked Jill

"I guess we just thought the Kids were trying to play us off" replied Gordon

"All we can do now is try and pick up the pieces" he added

"Where do we start" asked Jill

"Well I suppose we sit all the kids down and apologise and then we listen and do our best to help in any way we can" Gordon replied

"Let's start with the other three tonight and deal with Ash tomorrow she's going to need us the most she's been the most affected" he added

They sat there for about another hour chatting. Ash had been sleeping pretty quietly there were a couple of times that she mumbled but she was quickly soothed she started to come around slowly the pain killers starting to lose their effect. Ash had been awake for about ten minutes and Jill and Gordon were trying to get her to talk about her dream

"But I don't remember" sobbed Ash

"Was I screaming a lot" she added in between sobs

"No it wasn't that bad, but you were screaming for mum and sister Brigid was doing her best to calm you down but you were getting louder and louder until mum came and calmed you down" said Gordon

"Did I upset her very much" sobbed Ash

"No I think your dad upset her more" replied Jill

"How" asked Ash

"It doesn't matter now" replied Gordon

"So you really can't remember it then" asked Jill

"All I can remember is it was different from before, but I can't say how or why" replied Ash

"It's alright as long as you are o.k. that's all that matters and if you do remember you know where we are" said Jill giving Ash a hug

"How's the pain now" Gordon asked

"It's alright, can we go home now" she asked and was surprised when they agreed

"What's wrong with me then I thought you wanted to operate" queried Ash

"Well it's probably easier if we show you" replied Gordon


	31. Chapter 31

They all made their way to Jill's office Gordon got the X-rays out of their sleeves and pointed

"You see here well the positioning is not quite right which we believe is causing nerve damage which is telling you your in pain where the nerves should travel from, do you see" said Gordon

"Yes I think so" replied Ash who was still trying to take it all in after a few minutes

"So what happens now" she asked

"Now we go home, your dad and I will contact the surgeon on Monday to see what he suggests and we'll take it from there" replied Jill

"O.k. I know it's not fair to ask but what do you think will happen" asked Ash

"We don't really know it could be a few things" replied Gordon

"Like what" asked Ash

"Well it might mean taking it all out, or just the screw or do nothing and hope for the best" Gordon said while placing the x-rays back in the sleeves Ash had broken down and Jill was comforting her

"It's alright we will be with you every stage of the way" said Jill trying to reassure her

"I know, it's all my fault why was I so stupid" said Ash

"You are not stupid, things like this happen to people all the time there is no reason" replied Jill

"Is it because I don't believe in him up there like sister Brigid" asked Ash

"No don't ever think like that, none of this is because you don't believe and it's not your fault" replied Gordon

"Well who's is it then" asked Ash

"No-ones it was an accident, no-one is to blame and it certainly is not your fault" replied Gordon

"But sister is always saying things happen for a reason" replied Ash

"Not everything, sister says things like that because she has her faith and that is what they believe, they believe that God makes things happen to make them stronger and so they can learn from them" said Jill

"Now let's get home and see what mess the others have left it in" said Gordon

"I'm so sorry" said Ash

They drove home in silence Ash was staring out the window trying to come to terms with everything that had just gone on. They were nearly home when Ash gasped

"Ash what is it" said Jill panicked turning round to face Ash

"I don't know I think something's coming back" replied Ash

"What from your dream" asked Jill

"Yes but it doesn't make sense" replied Ash

"Go on maybe we can help" replied Gordon

"Well sister was taking me saying I had to be more like her and I was screaming for you but it was like you couldn't hear or see me because you were carrying on with your conversation and I remember hearing her say see they never wanted you they just felt sorry for you now be a good girl and come quietly" said Ash with shudder

"That's all I can remember" she added

"You know that's not true we would never let you go because we love you don't you" said Gordon

"Yeah I know it was just a stupid dream" replied Ash with a smile

Just then they pulled into the drive way Katie had opened the front door before the car had stopped

"Is everything alright" Katie asked Jill as she stepped up to greet her

"Yes, thank-you for telling me" whispered Jill

"Right let's get you inside and make a start on dinner" said Jill

"I've already started it will be ready in about half an hour" replied Katie

"Thank you but you didn't have to" replied Gordon

"Just trying to help out" replied Katie

They got inside and took their coats and shoes off

"Right I'll give Katie a hand you two go and sit down" said Jill

"I'm not hungry I might just go on up to bed" replied Ash

"You have to eat sweetheart, keep your strength up" said Gordon

"Why don't you stretch out on the couch, I won't leave you I promise" said Gordon

Ash could see they were trying to be understanding even though she didn't really understand herself so agreed. She went in the front room and laid down on the couch within minutes she was asleep, Gordon was sat in his chair reading when Jill bought him through a drink

"Thanks I think she's exhausted" said Gordon taking the drink from Jill

"I'm not surprised between the pain and the nightmares I doubt she's been sleeping much" said Jill

"If only she had spoken to us" replied Gordon

"Well I think we are all to blame there" replied Jill

"Yes I suppose so" replied Gordon

"So what did you say to Matron" asked Gordon

"I asked her to come along with us tomorrow and we would be there to pick her up around ten unless we phoned to change why?" asked Jill

"Just wondered, she seemed more like the old matron that's all" replied Gordon

"Well I think she liked being needed again, I hope you don't mind I know we said only family but she is like family to me" said Jill

"I don't mind at all, after all she has done for this family especially this one she is as good as one of us" replied Gordon with a smile Jill gave him a kiss and went back into the kitchen to check how everything was going.

Jonathon had laid the table and Tom was getting everyone's drinks organised when they were all in the kitchen

"Thank you all I don't know what I would of done if you hadn't been here to help these last few weeks" said Jill tears in her eyes

"Mum" said Jonathon

"I'm fine really" replied Jill the kids all cuddled her

"Right let's get these plates through, Tom go tell your dad it's ready please" said Jill carry plates through the others following

"Dad, dinners ready" said Tom

"O.k. thanks Tom" replied Gordon

He gently squeezed Ash's shoulder while saying "Ash, sweetheart, dinners ready"

Ash woke rubbing her eyes

"Dinners ready" said Gordon with a smile

"O.k." replied Ash getting up slowly and holding her side

"Are you alright" asked Gordon

"Yeah just a little sore" replied Ash

Gordon followed her through into the dining room


	32. Chapter 32

They were all sat down to dinner talking quietly between themselves when

"Guy's quiet please, you're mum and I have something to say" said Gordon

They all went quiet Gordon took a sip from his drink

"O.k. this isn't easy for us but we owe you all a big apology for not listening to you all and sorting this all out a lot sooner" said Gordon

"Yes we are both very sorry" added Jill

"What for" asked Tom

"This whole mess with sister Brigid, we never thought it would ever get this bad and we never quite believed that what you were telling us was the whole truth" said Gordon

"Don't get us wrong we believed some of it but we thought as kids you were making it seem worse than what it was" said Jill

"There's nothing to apologise for" said Katie

"Well we feel there is and we are very sorry and we want to talk to you all on your own we should of known that you were telling us the truth" said Jill

"Well as we are all apologising I would like to apologise to you all for how I've been" said Ash getting up and taking her plate

"Where are you going" said Gordon

"I'm taking the plates out and taking Katie's turn at washing up seeing as she did the cooking" said Ash continuing with what she was doing

"I don't think so" said Jill

"Why not I'm the only one who hasn't done something towards this dinner, so it's only fair I pull my weight" said Ash

"No you are still in pain I will not let you do it" said Jill "Gordon tell her" she added when she could tell Ash was not listening to her

"Yes your mother's right sit down I will do the dishes" said Gordon

"O.k. but I will make the drinks then I can sit down while I wait for the kettle" said Ash while taking the dishes out not waiting for a reply, she also started to do the dishes while waiting for the kettle to boil

Meanwhile Gordon and Jill were talking to the others about the whole sister Brigid situation they were all very understanding and said that it didn't bother them very much it was just as Jill and Gordon had feared it was Ash that was the most affected by it all.

"Right I'm going to see where Ash has got to with our drinks" said Jill

Ash had washed the dishes and had just finished pouring the hot water into the teapot and was placing the lid on when Jill walked through the door

"What are we going to do with you" said Jill seeing the dishes on the side

"We told you to rest" she added

"I thought I would make a start while I was waiting" said Ash

"Right well go and sit with the others I will bring this through" said Jill

"You'll never guess what this one has done now" said Jill bringing the drinks through

"Disobeyed us and done the dishes that's what" she added before anyone could guess

"Aisling, how many times do we have to tell you" said Gordon

"I'm sorry I was only trying to help" said Ash

"You can help by doing as you are told" said Gordon

"I'm sorry it's just" said Ash getting up and leaving the dining room

"Ash, sweetheart talk to me" said Jill putting the tray down and following her out, Ash turned around

"I just feel so useless I should be able to do something as easy as wash the dishes" said Ash, she then turned and ran up the stairs and jumped on her bed and screamed into her pillow, Jill had followed her up

"Ash sweetheart, it will get back to normal, but for now we need to take it a little easier yes" said Jill whilst rubbing her back gently, Ash turned around and cuddled into Jill

"I promise it will get better we just need to take it one day at a time" said Jill giving her a kiss on her forehead

"Right let's go back down and finish our drinks" said Jill getting up

"I might stay up here if that's alright" Ash replied

"Of course, I'll get your drink bought up" replied Jill

"No don't worry about it I might just go to bed, I'm still pretty tired" said Ash

"Are you sure it's no problem" said Jill

"Yeah I'm sure thank you can you say goodnight to the others for me" replied Ash

"Of course, I will check on you when we come up, good night sweetheart, love you" said Jill giving Ash a cuddle

"Night mum, love you too" replied Ash giving her a kiss

"Just call if you need anything" said Jill as she walked out the door

"Thanks mum" replied Ash

Jill went back downstairs and sat chatting with the others over their drinks about two hours later they all decided to call it a night as they had to all be up and out in the morning. Jill and Gordon poked their heads in and checked on Ash as they went passed she was sleeping but not peacefully she was tossing and turning and mumbling. They walked back onto the landing to discuss what to do

"I should stay with her again tonight" said Jill

"No I'll stay with her tonight then you can get a proper nights sleep" replied Gordon

They were still discussing who was going to sleep in Ash's room to keep an eye on her while they were getting ready for bed in their room, meanwhile Ash had woken up and had gone downstairs to get a glass of water. Jill had won the fight and had gone back into Ash's room to find it empty she went to the bathroom which was also empty, then she went to Gordon

"She's not in her room or the bathroom, where is she" asked Jill

"She's not sleep walking is she" queried Gordon

"No she never has before" said Jill they made their way out of their bedroom and were about to go downstairs when they heard someone on the stairs

"Hello" said Gordon

"Sorry dad" said Ash

"Ash, is that you" asked Gordon

"Yes sorry did I wake you" she asked

"No, are you alright" said Jill

"Yes, I just needed a drink" said Ash

"Are you sure that's all" asked Jill

"Yes, why" asked Ash

"It's just that you seemed a bit restless when we checked in on you" replied Jill

"I'm fine I promise, goodnight, love you" replied Ash

"Love you too, just come and get us if you need us" replied Jill

"Night Ash" said Gordon

They all made their way back to their rooms Ash could hear Gordon and Jill discussing what had just happened she now knew that whenever they went into a room where they expected her to be and she wasn't there it scared the hell out of them it was like their heart missed a beat until they could find her. The rest of the night went by pretty quietly a couple of times Jill and Gordon got up during the night to check on Ash but she was sleeping peacefully.


	33. Chapter 33

At about eight Jill and Gordon got up and made their way downstairs and got the breakfast ready Gordon then shouted upstairs for the kids, who all made their way downstairs.

Once all of them were sat down with their breakfast Gordon said

"Right all of you we are all leaving at half nine no later, no excuses"

"Where are we going dad" asked Tom

"It's a surprise" said Gordon

"What do we need to bring" asked Katie

"Just your selves" replied Gordon

They all went to make their way up

"Ash can you stay here for a minute please" asked Jill who was making a start on the dishes

"Yes" replied Ash picking up the tea towel to start drying up

"Leave that" said Jill

"Are you up for going out today or would you rather stay here" Jill asked

"What are we doing" asked Ash she knew they wouldn't tell but she thought it wouldn't hurt to try she picked up a cereal bowl and started to dry it

"Now that would be telling, but we asked matron to come along as well, but if you don't feel up to it today you and me could stay here and do something just us" said Jill

"No I want to go, honestly I feel better" replied Ash she wanted to say otherwise she always loved spending time with just Jill and she knew if she did they would be really worried about her

"Well alright then but anytime you want to come home just say and one of us can bring you back" said Jill

"You better go and get ready" said Jill taking the tea towel from Ash

"Thanks mum" replied Ash giving her a kiss she knew they only had her best interests at heart

Ash was just finishing getting ready when there was a knock at her door

"One second...O.k. you can come in now" said Ash

"Ash I want to apologise" said Katie

"No it's me who should apologise I was out of order, I shouldn't of said or done what I did I am really sorry" said Ash

"But I told mum and I kept these" replied Katie handing over the sketches

"Great thank you, I'm so glad you did both" replied Ash with a smile

"Are you two ready" said Jill poking her head round the door Ash quickly stuffed the pictures behind her back

"What's that" asked Jill nodding toward Ash

"Nothing" replied the girls

"Well it's something let me have a look" replied Jill

"Mum it's nothing" said Katie with a wink

"Right well if you're ready let's get going" replied Jill

Ash stayed in her room for a second safely placing the pictures in her desk drawer. She caught the others up on the stairs while they were waiting for the others they were trying to get it out of Jill where they were going

"Ohhh go on mum we won't tell the others promise" said Katie

"No, I wonder where the others have got to" replied Jill her patience running thin

"And where's your dad got too" she added looking at her watch

"He was out by the car's putting stuff in the boot" said Ash

"What stuff" asked Katie

Ash went to say something

"Be very careful what you say we haven't assigned cars yet" said Jill

"Not fair" said Katie

"What's not fair" said Gordon coming in through the back door

"Nothing" said Katie

"Right then are we ready" said Gordon

"We're waiting on the boys" said Jill

Gordon walked through to the bottom of the stairs

"Boy's come on" he shouted up

Silence he waited a couple of minutes

"Boy's come on" Gordon shouted back up

The girls were still trying to get out of Jill where they were going

"I am not telling you you're just have to wait and see" said Jill

Gordon walked back through to the kitchen

"Why don't you three go on and meet Matron" said Gordon

"Boy's come on two minutes" he shouted upstairs

"I'll be right behind you and meet you there" said Gordon turning back to Jill

"Right then you two off we go" said Jill to Ash and Katie

"Bye dad" said Ash and Katie as they went out the door

Jill and the girls had pulled out of the drive when Gordon heard the movement of the boy's coming downstairs, he locked the backdoor

"About time now come on the others have already gone" said Gordon sternly

"Sorry dad" said Tom and Jonathon

"What have you been up to on second thoughts it's probably better I don't know" said Gordon shutting the front door behind him

Meanwhile Jill and the Girls had arrived at matron's who had been ready and waiting since nine o'clock, as soon as she saw Jill's car coming round the corner she was out the front door and by the gate just as Jill pulled up.

"Morning matron, how are you" asked Jill getting out the car

"I'm fine and how are you my dear" replied Matron

"Better thank you" replied Jill she moved round the car towards Matron and opened up the passenger side door. Matron got in and Jill shut the door behind her

"Hello girls, how are you" asked matron turning round to face them

"Fine and how are you" said the girls

"Good thank you looking forward to today" said Matron

"Yeah it would be better if we knew where we were going" replied Katie

By this time Jill had got back in the car, she could tell Ash was getting restless and there was still no sign of Gordon

"That's all part of the surprise" said Matron

Jill turned to face the girls and placed a hand onto Ash's knee

"Are you alright" she asked concerned Ash was pushing herself so they would be less worried then if she had asked to stay behind

"Yeah just a bit stiff how much longer till we get there" asked Ash

"Not much longer I promise, now the others are here" said Jill turning back around and putting her seat belt on

They were in the car for about another half an hour for the last five minutes both Jill and Matron were getting considerably worried about Ash she had pulled her knees up and had stopped taking part in any of the conversation. They pulled up in the car park and parked next to Gordons car.

Jill didn't even switch the engine off she turned around

"Ash, do you want me to drive you home" she asked

"No, I'll be fine in a minute" replied Ash

"I don't want you pushing yourself just to keep everyone else happy" replied Jill

"Really mum I'll be fine in a minute I promise" replied Ash

By this time Gordon and the boys had gotten out of their car and Gordon had made his way around to Jill's side of the car.

Jill switched the engine off and opened her door

"Everyone alright" asked Gordon

Jill just shook her head by this time Matron and Katie had gotten out the car and were walking around to Gordon. Ash was still stuck in the car because she was sat behind Jill

"I think she's pushing herself" said Jill

"I'm fine really" Ash butted in

"She went terribly quiet" added matron

"And she pulled her knees up" added Katie

"Right thank you, Katie can you help the boy's get the car unpacked" said Gordon and when he saw the face she pulled

"I'll be along in a minute" he added he then poked his head in the car

"Right what's going on" said Gordon to Ash

"I'm just a little stiff, I'll be fine once I can stretch out" replied Ash

"Are you sure" asked Jill

"Yes, I promise I will tell you if I don't feel up to it and want to go home" said Ash

"Alright, but on one condition" said Gordon

"O.k." said Ash

"You have to stay with one of us at all times" said Gordon

"What that's not fair" said Ash

"Right then home it is" said Gordon

"Okay I promise" said Ash


	34. Chapter 34

They had arrived at the forest Jill and Gordon had decided that they would bump into less people they knew than if they had gone to the beach.

Jill got out the car followed by a rather stiff and down beaten Ash how's this fair they had promised not even twenty four hours ago to treat her more like the others and now they had just taken it away. She was expected to keep her promises, but they could promise what they liked only to take it away again.

"Right you lot off we go" said Gordon

Ash went to grab a bag out of the car

"I don't think so" said Gordon he then added "The boy's and I are coming back for this stuff" before slamming the boot shut and locking the car

Ash stood there annoyed she folded her arms

"You look just like your mother when you do that" said Gordon

Ash just walked away from him and went over to join the others

"Can I help with anything" Ash asked the others

"Yeah you can help with these" replied Tom handing over a few blankets

"No, you don't" said Gordon putting his bags down and taking the blankets

"It's only a few blankets" whinged Ash

"Yeah dad" said Katie

"You are not to carry anything down" replied Gordon

"And I told you to stay with one of us at all times remember" he added

"I was I was with these" replied Ash

"Yeah dad she was with us and it's not like we were that far away from you" added Jonathon

Once they had all got to the spot that they liked and Gordon and the boys had come back with the rest of the stuff and had their picnic the three older ones had been allowed to go off for a walk. Ash had sat on a blanket as far away from her parents and matron as possible and was doing her best to ignore Gordon.

"What was that all about by the car" asked Jill to Gordon

"I was standing firm and not letting her push the boundaries" said Gordon

"It was a bit forceful though" replied Jill

"No she has to learn we have to learn to trust her" replied Gordon

"I agree with Jill, you did come on a bit strong especially when she was with the others" added Matron

"And don't forget I was there when you promised to treat her more like the others" added Matron

"Yes we said we would try" replied Gordon

"Well how does it look if you can easily break a promise" said Matron

"Why should she believe anything you say" said Matron after a short pause

But before anything else could be said the others came back

"Did you enjoy your walk" asked Jill

"Yeah it was good" they replied sitting down

Ash had taken along her music and sketch pad she got these out of her bag not wanting to hear any more of the conversation and be reminded of what she had missed out on she wished she had asked to stay behind now at least she wouldn't be feeling so miserable.

The boys had started to kick a ball around, Katie was sat talking to Matron about what she had been up to, Gordon was falling asleep in his chair and Jill had been sat there watching Ash thinking what to say to try a still make this day work out well for everyone she went and sat next to Ash. Ash took off her headphones.

"Ash, what are you drawing" asked Jill

"Nothing really, I'm not really in the mood, I was just doing it so no one would bother me" replied Ash

"Would you like me to leave you then" asked Jill

Ash shrugged her shoulders and then replied "You can do what you want"

"Is it really that bad" asked Jill

"If I had known it would be like this, I would've asked to stay at home at least there's more to do" replied Ash truthfully

"It can't be as bad as all that" replied Jill

They sat in silence for a few minutes and when Ash hadn't said anything else

Jill asked "would you like to go on a walk with me"

Ash just nodded they got up and Jill went and told Matron what they were doing

Half an hour had past and Jill and Ash were still not back from their walk in truth they had found a little area and were sat talking openly and truthfully to each other

Meanwhile Gordon had woken up and was wondering where they had gotten to the weather was starting to turn cold and he wanted to make a start on getting back home

"Did they say where they were going, or how long they were going to be" asked Gordon while packing some of the stuff away

"No they didn't but I'm sure they won't be that much longer" replied Matron

"Which way did they go" asked Gordon

"That way" pointed Katie in the direction they had gone

"Right well if they're not back by the time I'm back from putting these in the car I'll start looking for them" replied Gordon getting up and taking the picnic basket

"Dad do you want me to take anything" asked Tom

"Yes you can bring those" replied Gordon with a nod towards a pile he had already made

Between them they managed to carry everything apart from a couple of chairs and blankets when they came back and there was still no sign of Jill

"Right I'm going to look for them" stated Gordon

"Give them five minutes they are probably on their way back" replied Matron

"Alright five minutes" replied Gordon sitting back down

Meanwhile Jill and Ash were on their way back after Jill had looked at her watch and realised that the time had flown by and it was getting close to the time in which Gordon wanted to leave to get home. Jill didn't want to leave she was starting to get Ash's trust and starting to get an understanding to the way Ash had been feeling and what had been going on all these years with sister Brigid and looking back on it there was a few times they could of stopped it but they just thought she was being a normal child and had forced her to still go along but she also could see now why Ash had always stayed close to them when she was around, but that hadn't helped because they couldn't see it, it was always easier to see things clearer when you look back on them with a different perspective.

Gordon was getting restless when he saw them coming in the distance

"Right everybody they're here, let's get going" He said picking up a blanket and folding it

"Where have you been we've been waiting you knew what time we were leaving" said Gordon quietly to Jill

"Sorry Gordon but something was a bit more important besides you could've gone on and we would have caught you up" replied Jill

"Sorry Dad it was my fault I" started Ash before Gordon interrupted "Right let's get going"

"Gordon" said Jill angrily as he was walking away

"It's alright mum" said Ash following Gordon

"No it's not alright" stated Jill

Ash grabbed Jill's arm and looked her in the eyes

"Mum please, no more arguments because of me, please" begged Ash

"It's alright, it's not your fault" replied Jill

They had fallen behind the rest only matron was with them now

"Come on hurry up" shouted Gordon not looking behind him

"Mum" said Ash

"Yes" replied Jill

"I need to stop" replied Ash

"What's wrong" asked Jill

"I'll be fine in a minute I just need to..." replied Ash falling to the ground


	35. Chapter 35

"Ash" said Matron stopping and bending down and taking her wrist

"Ash, sweetheart, talk to me" said Jill kneeling down in front of her "Where does it hurt" she asked although she had a pretty good idea already

"I'll be fine in a minute please don't fuss" said Ash trying to get up

"No stay there" said Matron taking her arm again trying to take her pulse

"No I can rest when we get home I've already made dad upset I don't want to make it any worse" replied Ash trying to get up

"Ash let me deal with him you just sit down and rest" replied Jill

"Besides they can go on if they want to" Jill added

Meanwhile the others had gotten back to the car

"Where have they gotten to now" said Gordon

"I don't know but I know Ash was trying to talk to you but you walked away from her" said Katie

"I'm going to go back and check everything's alright" replied Jonathon not waiting for a reply he didn't have to walk that far back to find Jill and Matron huddled around Ash

"Mum?" said Jonathon, Jill looked around and smiled

"What can I do to help?" He asks

Jill gets up and walks to him and talks quietly to him

"First I need you to go back to your dad and tell him to go on and then I need you to come back with a bottle of water and my doctor's bag"

"Okay" nodded Jonathon

Jonathon ran back to the car and opened up the boot of the mini collecting Jill's doctor's bag and a bottle of water

"Dad mum says you can go on home" said Jonathon

"What's going on" Gordon asks

"I don't know she asked me to get these and to tell you to go on home, that's all I know" replied Jonathon

"Who is it" asked Gordon

"Dad just go home mums got it all under control" replied Jonathon

"Is it Ash" asked Katie

Jonathon nodded, "I'm coming with you" replied Katie

"No you can't we all won't fit in the car, go with dad" replied Jonathon

But before anything else could be said Gordon took the bag and bottle from Jonathon and was making his way back

"Nice one, see what you've done now" Jonathon said to Katie following Gordon

"What" replied Katie

"They didn't want dad there" replied Jonathon in a whisper

"How was I suppose to know" said Katie

"What are you talking about" asked Gordon looking round

"Nothing" replied Katie but before anything else could be said they reached Jill and the others

"Jill" said Gordon but before he could say anything else Jill looked around and took her bag and the bottle of water from him and said thank you she then began rummaging around in her bag Gordon placed a hand on her arm which stopped her "What's going on" he asked

"Not here, not now" replied Jill getting back to what she was doing

"I'm sorry" replied Gordon, Jill got up and walked away Gordon followed her

Jonathon and Katie were still having the argument and matron was trying to stop all of this going on because she could see Ash was getting upset and was probably blaming herself for all of this.

"It's not me you need to apologise to but right now something's are more important" said Jill

"Mum" said Tom

"Yes" replied Jill turning back around she noticed all hers and matrons hard work had been undone thanks to the arrival of the others they had just managed to calm Ash down and for her to accept that she needed their help but because the others had arrived she had gotten to her feet and was slowly making her way back to the cars on her own.

"Stop right there young lady" said Jill everyone apart from Ash stopped what they were doing

"What do you think you are doing" asked Gordon

Ash didn't stop or reply she didn't realise they were talking to her it was taking all her concentration to keep going

Jill shoved her bag at Gordon and quickly walked to Ash and took her arm which made her jump

"What do you think you are doing" said Jill

"This is all my fault" said Ash "I'm just trying to get home" she added

"Right well first things first sit down" Jill said while placing a hand on her shoulder and gently forcing her to sit down she then got her bag from Gordon and asked them all to go back to the car but no-one moved.

She decided to ignore the others and place all her concentration on Ash "Here you go sweetheart take these" "Now sit there quietly for five minutes" she added

The others were asking Gordon and Matron what was going on they were trying to understand what was happening because they felt helpless, Jill went over and was talking to the others

"Is there anything we can do" asked Katie

"No, why don't you lot go on home, I'm sure Ash doesn't want an audience" replied Jill

Ash had been sat there for a couple of minutes but it felt like ten to her what with the others stood around talking and watching her she got up gingerly and started walking towards the others and towards the cars she slid her hand into Jill's and rested her head on her shoulder

"Are you alright" Jill asked

"Can we just go home" Ash whispered

"Of course we can sweetheart" replied Jill

"Right we will take it one step at a time" added Jill

"And your coming back in my car" added Gordon

"Mum no, please can I go back with you, please" pleaded Ash

"You will be matron, dad, you and I are all going back in dad's car, Katie's going to drive the others back in my car" replied Jill

"Can I go back with the others then" tried Ash

"No, nice try but I want to keep a close eye on you" replied Jill

By this time they had gotten back to the cars

"Right everyone in the cars now and Katie you are to drive straight home" said Gordon

"Yes dad, mum is she alright" asked Katie

"Yes she will be let's just all go home" replied Jill giving the keys over and getting into the back of the car next to Ash

Ash didn't speak the whole of the journey home as soon as she had gotten in to the car she had put her music on, she could hear the adults talking about what had happened and she could hear Jill telling Gordon off for the way he had been and she could see her getting upset, she slipped her hand into Jill's and placed her head on her shoulder and closed her eyes after that they drove the rest of the way in silence.


	36. Chapter 36

When they arrived home they showed matron into the front room Jill and Katie went off to get drinks while Gordon and the boys unpacked the cars.

Jill was talking to Katie in the kitchen

"I need you and the boys to keep an eye on Ash while I talk to your Dad" said Jill

"Okay, how? All she wants to do is go upstairs and be on her own" said Katie

"I'll tell her we need to keep an eye on her for another half an hour or so, and you can suggest playing a game to pass the time" replied Jill

"Okay, I will do my best" replied Katie

"Thank-you" replied Jill picking up the tray and going to the front room

Ash was leaving "Where do you think you're going" asked Jill

"Upstairs to my room" replied Ash

"No I don't think so I need to keep a close eye on you for half an hour or so and besides we have a guest" replied Jill

Ash made her way back in and sat on the sofa and folded her arms

"Ash do you want to play a game" asked Katie

"No thanks" replied Ash picking up a magazine from the table and pretending to read it

"Oh go on it will be fun" replied Katie

"No" replied Ash

By this time the boys had come in and Gordon had gone to make a start on dinner,

"Come on Ash we will play what you want to" pleaded Katie

"Yeah come on Ash it's always better if the four of us play" tried Tom

"No" said Ash

"Why not" asked Jonathon

"Because I just don't want to" replied Ash

"Mum please can I go upstairs" Ash pleaded to Jill

"No not yet, why don't you play a game the time will go faster then" replied Jill

"Okay" replied Ash knowing she had no choice in the matter she chucked the magazine back down on the table

When the game was under way and Jill had checked Matron was alright keeping an eye on Ash Jill went to give Gordon a hand with the dinner.

"What do you want me to do?" asked Jill

"You can make a start on the salad" replied Gordon

"What was all of that about earlier" asked Jill starting to cut the tomatoes

"What do you mean" asked Gordon

"What do I mean well for starters it was suppose to be a nice day for everyone and you alienated Ash by saying she had to stay with us while the others went for a walk and then when we came back she tried to speak to you and you just walked away" said Jill her voice getting louder as she started to lose her temper

"I just want to keep her close for you is that such a bad thing I know how hard it is when you don't know where she is" replied Gordon

"Me or You" asked Jill

"Alright both of us and I didn't mean to walk away" replied Gordon moving over to Jill

"No Gordon don't" said Jill

Meanwhile the others were trying to start arguments with each other over cheating to mask the noise of their parents arguing it was all getting to much for Ash who got up

"Where are you going" asked Katie looking up

"I'm just going to the toilet is that alright" lied Ash

"Yeah of course" replied Katie

Back in the Kitchen Jill and Gordon were still talking about the day

"So why when I asked you to go on home did you stay" asked Jill

"I thought you might need me" replied Gordon

"I had it all under control" started Jill

"I know you did but I suppose I felt guilty" butted in Gordon

"Did you not think about how Ash was feeling" asked Jill

There was silence meanwhile Ash who had lied about going to the toilet had sat down on the stairs and was listening to everything going on trying to pluck up the courage to go in and stop the conversation before something was said that could never be taken back.

When Gordon hadn't said anything Jill continued with what she was saying

"We were following you back when Ash started to get slower but you would have known that if you had paid attention instead of barking orders at the front"

"I'm sorry" said Gordon

"You weren't there when she called out and fell to her knees exhausted and in pain" said Jill tears starting to fall

"You weren't there trying to get her to rest instead of getting up because she felt she had let you down" sobbed Jill

"I'm sorry" said Gordon putting an arm around Jill

"Come on Ash, it's your turn" shouted Jonathon from the front room

"Just coming" replied Ash

"And then when you did come back with the others you didn't listen to what we wanted you just did what you wanted what was best for you" stated Jill

"I'm sorry Jill, really I am" said Gordon

"I'll try harder" he added

Ash got up and made her way into the front room

"About time it's your turn" said Tom

"I don't want to play any more I know what you are trying to do, I'm not stupid" replied Ash

Ash turned back out of the front room and made her way towards the stairs

"Ash" said Matron getting up

Ash stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned around to face matron

"Ash no one is saying you are stupid" said Matron, Ash sat on a step Matron sat next to her

"So why are they trying to keep me out the way while mum and dad are in there arguing about today that was supposed to be a family day out that I ruined for everyone" replied Ash

"It's not your fault" replied Matron

"See even you are doing it now, everyone thinks lying about it will make me feel better, just like when we were little kids and fell and hurt ourselves and mum would make it better by kissing it" said Ash

"Really Ash it is not your fault" tried Matron

"Not even you can believe that" said Ash getting up and going to her room

"Where are you going" asked Matron

"Where I should have stayed all day to my room" replied Ash tears starting to fall

"Ash come here it is not your fault" replied Matron getting up

"No please leave me alone all I do at the moment is hurt the people I love, I just need to be left alone" replied Ash running up the stairs


	37. Chapter 37

Ash hadn't realised the others had been listening

"What are we going to do" asked Katie

"We go back in there and wait for your parents to finish their conversation and then I will talk to them" said Matron making her way to the front room

It wasn't long before Gordon came in to check if anyone needed a top up while Jill had gone upstairs to freshen up, she noticed that Ash's bedroom door was shut but didn't think too much about it, it was only when she was coming back past that she heard a bang in there she put her hand on the door handle and was about to go in when Gordon called her

"Jill can you come down here please" shouted Gordon

"Coming" she replied letting her hand linger on the handle for a few seconds before she went on down the stairs

Jill went downstairs and into the kitchen "Where are you" she asked

"In the front room" replied Gordon

As she walked into the front room everyone started talking at once but Jill put her hands up and said

"One at a time" while scanning the room looking for everyone she realised Ash wasn't in there she sat down next to matron who took her hand and told her everything that had happened word for word

"What do we do now mum" asked Jonathon

Everyone was clearly worried and looking to Jill for guidance but she was still trying to take it all in

"Mum" said Tom

"Right first we are going to act like normal" said Jill

Everyone looked at her waiting for something else to be said

"I can't do that I'm going to talk to her" said Gordon

"Who's with me" He asked

"No I think Jill is right" replied Matron

"This is going to take more than just going up and having a few words she needs to know you are there for her no matter what" she added

"So what then" Gordon asked

"You go and check dinner it should be ready by now" replied Jill

Five minutes later

"Dinners ready" shouted Gordon

"Right you lot go and get your dinner" said Jill

"Jill what are you thinking" asked Matron

"I don't know yet, have you any ideas" asked Jill

"Why don't we see if she will sit with just us" asked Matron

"We don't have to talk about anything to do with today just talk about anything" tried Matron

"I'll see she can be very stubborn" said Jill

"Right you lot, have you got everything you need, we are going to see if she will sit with me and matron so you lot stay in here please" said Jill

No one replied Jill left them to it and went upstairs and knocked on the door she didn't wait for a reply she went straight in Ash was busy drawing a picture she didn't see Jill come in

"Dinners ready darling" said Jill

"Mum, I'm sorry I made you and dad, have a fight" said Ash

Jill could see she had been crying

"It's not your fault, really your dad can be so stubborn sometimes" said Jill

"But I ruined the day for everyone" sobbed Ash

Jill moved closer and now noticed what Ash had been drawing it was of their day only she wasn't in it

"Sweetheart, listen to me you did not ruin the day for everyone, I for one enjoyed our walk and matron enjoyed your company in fact she is looking forward to sitting down to dinner with you and me, to tell you the truth the others have been so noisy I think the three of us should sit outside to eat alone" said Jill

Jill moved to get a jumper for Ash

"You might need this though it's a little chilly out" said Jill

"Won't it be too cold for matron then" asked Ash

"Well let's see what we can find for her in my room then" replied Jill

"Mum, thanks and don't worry about this" said Ash pointing to the picture

"It's not finished but I have finished one of my favourite part of the day" smiled Ash lifting up the picture to show the one underneath of her and Jill talking in the woods

"That's brilliant, take it down and show matron, and I wasn't worried" replied Jill

"No" said Ash

"Really" replied Jill hitting her playfully

"No, of course not" replied Ash sarcastically and ducking out the way of Jill's hand

"Come on mum matron's waiting" said Ash by her door

"Don't be so cheeky otherwise it will be your dad coming to get you next time" replied Jill

"I don't think so he would just shout" replied Ash

"Yes you may be right there" replied Jill

They rummaged around in Jill's closet and when they had found something they both agreed would be alright and Jill had one for herself they made their way down to matron who was waiting for them in the kitchen

Once they had gotten their food and given matron the jumper they made their way outside they were having a nice time out there Jill couldn't remember the last time she had seen Ash so relaxed and laughing since the accident or herself for that matter, Matron was telling stories about the old days.

They had finished eating and were just sat there talking when the others came out to see what was going on, Ash got up to take the plates in, Jill made eye contact with her to make sure everything was alright ash replied with a weak smile.

The others pulled up chairs and made themselves comfy sat around the table, Ash put the plates with the others and was making her way back out

"Ash can you put the kettle on please" shouted Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash making her way back in she filled up the kettle and switched it on she then started filling up the washing up bowl, she was half way through the washing up when the kettle had boiled

"What's everyone having" she shouted out the back door

"I'm just coming" replied Jill getting up and double checking what everyone was having

Ash went back to the washing up and was nearly finished when Jill had finished making the drinks

"Thank you" said Jill

"But leave that now, I'll finish once I've had this" added Jill

"It's alright it's almost done, just this last bit and then I'll be out" replied Ash

"Well if you're not out in five I'll send your dad in to get you" replied Jill taking the drinks out

"Okay" replied Ash

"Ohh and when you come can you bring those plates and forks and the cake please" said Jill nodding to the table where they were

"Yes mum" replied Ash turning back to the sink

Two minutes later ash was just drying her hands

"Come on Ash hurry up I'm starving" shouted Jonathon

"You're always hungry" replied Tom

"Hey and you're not" replied Jonathon

That was it they started fighting

"Boy's" said Gordon

"Boy's stop it now" said Jill angrily

"Sorry" they both said

"Where do you want this" asked Ash who had reached the table without anyone noticing her

Jill started making room "Just here will do thank you" she added

Ash put it all down "Which ones my drink" asked Ash

"This one" replied Matron

"Thank you" replied Ash picking it up and turning to make her way indoors

"Ash where are you going" asked Matron

"Indoors I feel a little cold" replied Ash

"Do you mind if I join you" asked Matron

"No not at all" replied Ash waiting for matron

"Let me take that for you" Added Ash helping matron with her drink once they were back in the front room and Ash had made sure matron was alright she ran upstairs to get her sketch pad and pencils on her way back down she could hear matron talking to someone but she didn't know who she secretly hoped they hadn't all followed them in


	38. Chapter 38

She slowly made her way in to the front room and was relieved to find it was only Jill and Matron in there

"Are you alright" said Jill moving over to her and placing one hand on her forehead while the other took her wrist

"Yes, I'm fine stop fussing" replied Ash trying to wriggle away but it was no good Jill just tightened her grip

"You will tell me if not, wont you" replied Jill

"Yes, mum, I'm fine really, just felt a little cold I promise" replied Ash sitting at the coffee table and opening to the sketch she was doing upstairs and taking a sip of her tea

Jill made herself comfy on the sofa behind her and was sat talking to matron but Ash could tell she was keeping a close eye on her she knew she had really scared her back in the woods earlier in the day what she didn't know was that matron had told them about what she had said on the stairs

Twenty minutes later and Ash had started another sketch this one was of the three of them at the table having dinner from her perceptive so she wasn't actually in it but it was how she saw it. The others had slowly made their way in it was getting really cold out there now

"Would anyone like another drink" asked Jill

Every replied yes Gordon and the others had just started a game

"Would you like a hand" asked matron

"You are our guest, Ash will help me won't you Ash" replied Jill

"Of course, happy to" replied Ash putting her pencil down and going out to the kitchen and putting the kettle on she also started drying some of the plates and cups that Jill had already washed up it was then she realised that Jill hadn't followed her in making her way back into the front room

"Mum" Ash queried she then saw what they were looking at she made her way back to the kitchen

Why had she left it on the table, why she knew they were looking at everything she did at the moment, did she want them to find it

The kettle flicked off, Ash quickly wiped away the tears and told herself to man up she made her way over and filled the tea pot and then refilled the kettle to make some coffee. While she was waiting for the kettle she got the tray ready with cups and saucers, sugar and milk.

Meanwhile Jill, matron and Gordon were looking at her pictures, there were the three that she had done of today some of the plants in the garden and then there were the last two the two they were all talking about the ones from her nightmares

"Gordon these are of her nightmares, they seem so real" said Jill

"What a vivid imagination" said Matron

"Gordon" said Jill seeing the look on his face seeing the cliff brought all those memories flooding back

"If only I could've done more" he muttered

"Gordon it was not your fault" replied Jill

"I know" he replied but before he could say anymore they were interrupted

Ash had come in with one tray with the cups and teapot and placed it on the table near to where they were she kept her head down

"Coffee is just coming" she said while walking back out the door

"Stupid, stupid, stupid" Ash muttered to herself walking back to the kitchen, she then swore to herself she would never draw another picture again as long as she lived she would finish her parents present and that was it.

Ash then filled the coffee pot and turned around to see Jill in the doorway watching, she felt a twinge in her side and tried to hide the pain

"Sorry it's just here" Ash said picking up the coffee pot and making her way towards the door trying not to make eye contact with Jill

"It's not that" replied Jill

"I'm sorry you weren't suppose to see them" replied Ash trying to get past Jill

"We need to talk" said Jill seriously

"All we do is talk" replied Ash "Plus they are waiting for this" she added

"This is not going away" replied Jill taking the coffee pot from her and taking it to the front room she was surprised to find Ash hadn't followed her she poked her head around the door she could see Ash busying herself in the kitchen

Jill picked up the sketch pad, her and Ash's drinks and took them to the kitchen and placed them on the table

"Sit down" Jill said

"Sorry" mumbled Ash biting her nail

Jill passed her drink over

"Thank-you" said Ash

"Sweetheart you are not in trouble" said Jill

"Yeah right" said Ash

"What's that supposed to mean" Asked Jill

"Well all I seem to be is in trouble" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, really you are not" said Jill

"I just wanted to ask about these" said Jill showing the two pictures

"What are they" she continued

"They are my nightmares" replied Ash

"Why did you draw them" asked Jill

"I don't know, it was all I could think of so I guess I drew them hoping it would help" replied Ash

"Did anyone tell you to draw this one" said Jill pointing at the one of the cliff

"No I swear" replied Ash "Why" she queried

"No reason" replied Jill

"Have I done something wrong, have I upset you" Ash asked panicked

"No sweetheart, you've done nothing wrong" replied Jill

"I have haven't I" said Ash getting up

"I'm so sorry" she made to leave

"Ash" said Jill grabbing her arm stopping her from leaving, Jill got up and pulled her into a hug

"You have done nothing wrong I promise I just want to talk that's all" she added

Once Jill had let her go Ash sat down again

"When did you do these" Jill asked

"Well that one I did today" said Ash pointing at the one of Sister Brigid pulling her away from a group of people who Jill now saw two of which were her and Gordon

"And the other one I don't know about nine, ten weeks ago when I first started having the dream" said Ash truthfully

They sat in silence for a few minutes

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you" said Ash

"It's alright it was just a shock seeing it again" said Jill

"What do you mean again" queried Ash

They had secretly hoped this day would never come but it was here at last they were going to have to tell her the truth about what had happened that day. Jill was about to begin when matron came in to say her goodbyes

"Right well I will be off now, thank you very much for a lovely day" said Matron

"Ohh gosh is that the time, yes thank you matron, goodbye and thank you again" said Jill getting up and giving her a peck on the cheek

"Bye matron" said Ash giving her a kiss as well

Matron turned back to Jill

"Don't be too hard on her" she said to Jill

"And that goes for you to" she added to Ash

"Promise" they both replied together

Gordon was giving her a lift home and was already in the car, Jill and Ash stood by the front door and waved her off

"Right where were we" said Jill turning back inside Ash followed

In between the others coming in and saying goodnight Jill started telling her about what had happened that day, she thought she was old enough now to understand the whole truth, when she had finished they sat in silence for a few minutes Jill was close to tears

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know if I had I never would have drawn it" said Ash starting to cry

"It's alright sweetheart, you weren't to know" said Jill getting up to sooth her

"I'm sorry" sobbed Ash

Jill was going to say something when they heard the front door close Gordon had come back from dropping Matron off

Ash ran over to him and said "I'm so sorry"

"I'm sorry to" he said giving her a cuddle looking over at Jill stood in the doorway

"Right young lady time for bed it's really late" said Jill

"Night Dad" said Ash giving him a kiss

"Night" he replied letting her go

"Night mum" Ash said while giving her a kiss Jill pulled her into a hug

"Night sweetheart" Jill replied

They watched her go up stairs, then they both went to say something

"No you go first" said Gordon following Jill who was tidying up after everyone again

"Gordon I'm sorry" she started

"No I'm sorry, I should never have put you in that situation" he interrupted

"I told her everything about that day" Jill started

"Gordon are you listening" she asked when he hadn't replied

"Yes, yes, sorry it just brought back some ugly memories" he replied following Jill into the kitchen

Jill put the cups down on the side and turned around to face Gordon

"I do love you" she said and gave him a hug

"I love you too"

"Let's leave this I will help you in the morning it's been a long day" Gordon added taking her hand and leading her upstairs


	39. Chapter 39

It was around five thirty in the Ormerod house everyone was asleep apart from Ash who had just been woken up with the pain in her side she tried to get comfy but it just wasn't happening frustrated she got out of bed and was quietly pacing up and down trying not to wake anyone else up she gave up after five minutes and tiptoed her way downstairs she poured herself a glass of water and took a couple of pain killers. Ash slid to the floor knowing she wouldn't make it back upstairs and waited for five minutes for them to kick in.

Ten minutes later she was still sat on the floor but the pain was starting to lessen and she could hear the movements of her parents getting ready for their day at work she stood up breathing through the pain and filled the kettle she then filled the washing up bowl with hot soapy water.

The pain was getting too much again so she quickly poured herself a glass of orange juice and got some cereal and sat down she didn't feel like eating much but she knew she had to.

Ash was away with her own thoughts just pushing her cereal around the bowl she didn't see Jill or Gordon come in

"Sweetheart, are you alright" said Jill noticing she was looking rather pale

"Yeah" replied Ash

"Really" said Jill sitting down next to her

"How long have you been up" asked Gordon

"A while" started Ash before she said more she looked at Jill so she gave up and told the truth

"I woke up at about five thirty in pain" said Ash

"Why didn't you wake us" asked Gordon

"I didn't want to bother you" started Ash

"You must always tell us" said Gordon

"Have you taken anything" asked Jill

"Yes about twenty minutes ago" replied Ash

Jill got up and switched the kettle on

"Maybe I should stay here this morning" whispered Jill to Gordon

"No don't stay here because of me" said Ash

"Who say's it's because of you" replied Jill

"I think it would be for the best" added Gordon

"Right that's sorted then I will have this then go in and get my paperwork and come back here" stated Jill placing the drinks on the table

"What have you got planned for today" Gordon asked Ash

"Nothing" replied Ash after a short pause she asked

"Why do you need something done" secretly hoping they would

"No I don't think so" replied Gordon

"About the pictures I am really sorry" said Ash getting up and putting her things in the sink

"That's alright sweetheart you weren't to know" replied Jill

Ash left the room and went upstairs she could here Jill and Gordon talking

"Right I am going I'll be back as quick as possible are you alright to stay here for five minutes" Jill asked Gordon

"Yes" replied Gordon giving Jill a kiss and going upstairs to get ready

About half an hour, later Gordon was looking out the front window and looking at his watch muttering to himself for Jill to hurry up. Ash walked back downstairs and sat on the sofa

"Dad why don't you go" Ash said

"I can't your mothers not back yet" replied Gordon

"She won't be long and besides the others are here" replied Ash

"Nice try" replied Gordon sitting down

"What" replied Ash trying to sound innocent

"I just don't want to be" started Ash she stopped when she heard someone coming down the stairs

"Hi dad what are you still doing here" asked Tom poking his head around the door

"Just waiting for mum" replied Gordon

"Oh okay" said Tom walking back out the room and into the kitchen

"You don't want to be what" asked Gordon

"It doesn't matter" replied Ash

Jill had just pulled up into the drive way

"I'll just go and give mum a hand" stated Ash getting up and moving towards the cars Gordon followed her

"Nice try but we are not going to give up that easily" replied Gordon

"Is everything all right" asked Jill when she spotted them

"Yes I just came to give you a hand" said Ash taking a pile of paperwork from her

"Thank-you" replied Jill, Ash started walking indoors "Just pop it on the desk sweetheart" Jill called after her

"Okay" replied Ash going through the door

Gordon stayed out there for five minutes telling Jill everything that had just happened Jill promised to get to the bottom of it but reasoned with him that Ash was probably still feeling guilty about everything that had happened recently.

Gordon said his goodbyes and went off to work


	40. Chapter 40

Jill went in she heard voices in the kitchen on her way through she glanced in at the study the door was still open from when Ash had placed the papers on the desk she walked through to the kitchen to find the older three mucking around and the spotless kitchen now looking like a bomb had gone off

"Mum" said Tom shocked

"Sorry" said Katie spinning round and spilling orange juice

"Right clean this mess up now" said Jill

"Sorry mum we weren't expecting you to be home" said Jonathon

"Clearly" replied Jill

"Where is your sister" she asked

All of them shrugged their shoulders whilst starting to clean up

"Well it's a good job I'm here to keep an eye on her then" replied Jill turning back around

She went upstairs and found Ash sat up on her bed reading

"Can you come downstairs please" said Jill

"Why what have I done" asked Ash

"Nothing I just need to keep a close eye on you" replied Jill

"Why can't I stay up here then" asked Ash

"Because I can't keep an eye on you and do my work as well if you are up here can I" replied Jill

"All right" said Ash placing the bookmark and shutting her book

"Thank you sweetheart" replied Jill

Ash followed Jill downstairs and into the study Jill sat down and started on her paperwork while Ash sat opposite in the other chair and starting reading her book they sat like that in silence for half an hour. Jill was already nearly half way through her paperwork

"Mum" said Ash

"Mmm, yes" replied Jill looking up

"Would you like a drink" asked Ash

"Just let me finish this and then I'll make them" replied Jill

"No that's alright what would you like" asked Ash placing her book down

"A cup of tea would be lovely please" replied Jill

Ash got up and went to the kitchen and flicked the kettle on she sat down at the table and was staring out the window waiting when Jill came through talking to her

"Sweetheart, Are you alright" asked Jill

"Yes why" asked a puzzled Ash

"Well I was just talking to you" replied Jill

"Sorry what was it" asked Ash

"I was asking what you had planned for this afternoon" replied Jill

"Nothing" replied Ash getting up and making the drinks

"Why" Ash asked while handing Jill her drink

"Just wondered if you were going out that's all" replied Jill

"I can't I'm grounded remember" stated Ash

"Your dad didn't mean it he was just angry" said Jill

"Still I better not" replied Ash

"Well what are you going to do then" asked Jill

"I don't know" replied Ash taking a sip of her tea

"Drawing?" asked Jill

"No" replied Ash a little too quickly

"Why not" asked Jill

"I just don't want to" replied Ash

"Is there something you want done" she added quickly trying to change the subject

Before anything else could be said the other three came bounding in the kitchen

"We're off see you later" said Tom

"Bye" said Ash

"What time are you going to be back" asked Jill

"Don't know" replied Jonathon

"Can you phone and let me know please" replied Jill

"Yes mum" replied Jonathon

"Come on you two" said Katie

Before anything else could be said the telephone rang

"Ormerod residence Katie speaking" Answered Katie

"Hi dad yeah I'll just get her" she replied

"Mum, it's for you" shouted Katie

"Okay thank you who is it" said Jill taking the receiver

"Dad" replied Katie turning around and following the boys out the front door

"Hello is everything all right" asked Jill

"Yes everything is fine this end how about yours" asked Gordon

"I don't know" replied Jill

"Go on" replied Gordon

"Well she's quiet, not concentrating on much and staring in to space" replied Jill she thought she better not include the not drawing bit

"Probably tired if she was up that early" replied Gordon

"I don't know I think there's more to it" replied Jill

"Don't read too much into it, let her come to you if there is a problem" replied Gordon

"Easier said than done" replied Jill

"I've got to go, I'll speak to you later, love you" replied Gordon

"Love you too" replied Jill putting the receiver down and walking back to the kitchen

"Who was that" asked Ash

"Your Dad checking you were alright, I think you worried him this morning" said Jill

"I'm fine I promise" replied Ash

"Right I'm going to get back to my paperwork" replied Jill

"Do you mind if I go and stretch out on my bed" asked Ash stifling a yawn

"Of course not" replied Jill maybe Gordon was right this time

An hour later and Jill had finished her paperwork, she had put it in her car ready for later, she then decided to go and check on Ash as she hadn't heard any noise from her since she said she was going upstairs to stretch out.

When she reached Ash's room she noticed the door open she peeped inside to find Ash curled up asleep on top of her bed, Jill carried on to her room and grabbed a blanket from the top of her wardrobe she took it back to Ash's room she draped it carefully over Ash then quietly went back downstairs.

Jill had just sat down with a cup of tea and a medical journal when the phone rang

"Dr Weatherill" Jill said

"Hello Jill" said Matron

"Hello matron, what can I do for you" asked Jill

"Nothing, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, I popped in this morning and Gordon told me what had happened" replied Matron

"To tell you the truth, I don't know" replied Jill

There was silence between the two of them for a few seconds then Jill carried on

"I don't know if I'm reading into it too much, but something is telling me there is more to it"

"What does Gordon say" asked Matron

"He said not to push and that she might be tired but there's something niggling at the back of my mind" said Jill

"Well I think your both right" said Matron

"Sorry" said Jill slightly confused

"Well you have to trust your instincts but Gordon is also right if she is tired she won't be thinking straight and if you push her too hard she might, push you away even harder" replied Matron

"What would we do without you" replied Jill

"Well I remember a time when you didn't want my help" replied Matron

"I'm sorry" replied Jill

"Don't be sorry, we wouldn't be who we are now without the past" replied Matron

"Thank you for everything" replied Jill

Before anything else could be said there was a knock at the door

"Sorry matron I've got to go there's someone at the door bye" said Jill

"Bye and you know where I am" replied Matron

Jill put the phone down and went to answer the door, she looked up stairs there was no sound of movement from Ash

Jill opened the door

"Hello Mrs Ormerod, is Jonathon in" asked James

"No sorry James they left a couple of hours ago, I'll let him know when he comes back" replied Jill

"Okay, sorry to have bothered you and thank you" replied James

Jill saw him walk down the drive and then shut the door, she looked at her watch it was nearly time for her to leave she made lunch for the both of them and then went up to get Ash who was just waking up

"How are you" said Jill

"A little better" replied Ash

"Good, well lunch is ready" replied Jill

Ash gingerly got up from the bed and started to fold the blanket Jill stepped in and took the blanket from her

"Leave that come and have your lunch" said Jill

Ash followed her down the stairs and into the kitchen where Jill had already laid out lunch they sat there in silence neither wanting to upset the other more than they had too.

Once they had finished Ash got up and started to wash up their glasses and plates Jill grabbed the tea towel

"Right I've got to go into work now, but if anything and I mean anything no matter how small you phone me right away" said Jill

"Yes mum" replied Ash

"I mean it" replied Jill

"Yes mum" replied Ash

"Right well take it easy and I'll be back soon" replied Jill giving her a cuddle

"Bye mum" replied Ash following her to the front door she stood there waving until Jill was out of sight.


	41. Chapter 41

Ash made her way into the front room and switched the television on she flicked through the channels but quickly turned it off again when there was nothing on, she looked around the room for something to do, nothing jumped out at her she sat there for what seemed like hours but was only a few minutes drumming her fingers on her knee and biting her lip.

How she wished someone else was here she got up and went to her room she pulled out her pictures and put some music on she arrange the pictures how she wanted them and then glued them into position on the card she was using, she would have to wait to get the frame until she was ungrounded.

She tried to get up but had been sat in the same position for too long her legs had gone numb she managed to pull herself on to the bed she sat there moving her legs, she heard a car pull up and glanced at the clock and realised that it was nearly six o'clock.

She got up and slid the pictures under her bed and then made her way downstairs just as Gordon let himself in the front door

"Hi Dad" said Ash glad someone else was here

"Hello sweetheart, feeling better" He asked placing his bag down and taking his shoes off

"Yeah, not to bad" replied Ash

"Right well do you want to give me a hand getting dinner ready mum will be home soon" asked Gordon

"Yes please" said Ash glad for something to do

"Have you heard from the others" asked Gordon

"No, nothing" replied Ash

"Well looks like it's just the three of us then" replied Gordon moving into the kitchen

"Right can you peel the potatoes and carrots please" said Gordon

"Yes dad" said Ash taking the peeler from Gordon who then put what he wanted to be peeled on the table by Ash

They worked in silence for a couple of minutes while Gordon turned the oven on and sorted the pots and pans out.

"So how was your day" asked Gordon

"Quiet, how was your day" asked Ash

"Anything but quiet" replied Gordon

"Lucky you" replied Ash

"Ash about yesterday, I'm really sorry" started Gordon

"Dad, its fine really, it's me who should be sorry" replied Ash before he could say anything else

"Well I should've listened and for that I am truly sorry" stated Gordon

"Right pass me the carrots" he added

Ash knew this meant he didn't want to say anymore on the subject so she kept quiet and passed over the carrots which he chopped and placed in one of the pans. When they had done the same with the potatoes

"Right well that's dinner under control thank you for all you're help" said Gordon

Ash went to say something but then changed her mind and instead went into the front room and put the television on

"Ash can you lay the table please" shouted Gordon from the kitchen

"Yes Dad" replied Ash

She had just finished laying it when she heard Jill arrive home

Jill had only just got through the door

"Hello, love would you like a drink" asked Gordon from the kitchen door

"Yes that would be lovely" replied Jill taking her shoes off she then poked her head into the front room

"Hello sweetheart, how are you" Jill asked Ash

"Fine, how are you" replied Ash

"I'm good, I'm just going to talk to your dad then I'll be right back" replied Jill making her way to the kitchen

"So did you have that little chat" asked Jill

"Yes" replied Gordon

Jill gave him a look which he knew meant he would have to expand on his answer

"Yes we both apologised for yesterday" replied Gordon

"Did you tell her about not being grounded anymore" asked Jill

"No" replied Gordon

"Gordon" said Jill annoyed

"What, I didn't get a chance to, I will when we sit down to dinner" said Gordon

Jill took her drink and went and sat in the front room with Ash

"So what have you done this afternoon" asked Jill

"Nothing" replied Ash

"Well I know that's not true you helped with dinner" replied Jill

"So have you watched telly" asked Jill

Ash shook her head

"Really I listened to some music and helped with dinner that's it" replied Ash

"Ash what's wrong" asked Jill

"Nothing, I'm sorry I guess I'm still a little tired, how was your afternoon" replied Ash

"It was fine, I'm just glad to be home and able to put my feet up" replied Jill

"Sorry" said Ash cuddling into Jill

"It's alright baby girl" replied Jill

It didn't go unnoticed that she didn't get told off for it this time. She picked up her medical journal and started reading it. Gordon who had been doing paperwork in the study came through about ten minutes later to say dinner was ready.

Ash switched the television off she hadn't really been watching it so she couldn't even of told you what side it had been on.

Jill placed her journal down and followed them through

They sat in silence for a few minutes

"Dad" said Ash

"Yes" replied Gordon

"I know I'm grounded but I was wondering if I could go and get my results tomorrow" said Ash

"Well about that" said Gordon

Ash looked at Gordon and then at Jill. Jill stepped in

"What your Dad is trying to say is that you are not grounded anymore, isn't Gordon"

"Yes" replied Gordon

"Really thanks mum, dad" replied an excited Ash getting up and giving them both a hug

"Well there are rules" replied Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash

"One of us has to know exactly where you are and you are not allowed out later than dinner time" replied Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash knowing that the rules seemed fair and she knew that this was a big step in regaining their trust

"Well tomorrow can I go into town to pick something up after my results" asked Ash

"Who are you going with" asked Gordon

"No one but I was hoping to get a lift home with one of you if that was alright" replied Ash

"Yes, of course it is" replied Jill

"Thanks Mum" replied Ash

"But when you have got what you need up town come straight to the hospital" stated Gordon

"Yes Dad" replied Ash she could tell they were nervous of letting her do this

They made small talk for the rest of the meal the others were still out

"Right let's play a game" said Gordon

"I don't know" replied Ash

"What are you scared I will beat you" asked Gordon

"No it's just" started Ash

"It's alright sweetheart" said Jill

Gordon got up and took the plates to the kitchen

"Sweetheart what are you worried about" asked Jill

"It's just last time" said Ash

"Yes well that isn't going to happen again, is it" questioned Jill

"No" replied Ash

"Well there's nothing to worry about is there then" replied Jill

"Let's go and beat dad" she added getting up

"Okay" replied Ash getting up

"Mum, thanks" she added giving her mum a hug

"You're welcome" replied Jill giving her a kiss

"Is that why you didn't want to play the other day" asked Jill

"No, I was just not in the mood to be around the others" replied Ash

"Why" asked Jill

"It's just me being silly I guess but I was jealous" replied Ash

Before anything else could be said Gordon came in with drinks

"Right what are we playing" asked Gordon

"Trivial pursuit" replied Jill

"What" replied a shocked Gordon

"I told you we should've played something else" replied Ash

"What you mean is a little bit easier" replied Jill jokingly

"No that's fine we'll play this" replied Gordon

They had been playing for about an hour when the others eventually came home as usual Jill was winning closely followed by Ash with Gordon quite a way behind

"Hello" shouted Tom from the hallway

"Hello we're in here" replied Gordon

The others made their way in interrupting the game

"What are you doing" asked Tom

"Playing a game" replied Jill

"What have you done today" asked Gordon

"Ohhh nothing much" replied Jonathon not wanting to rub Ash's nose in it too much

"That's not true" replied Katie

At that point Jill looked at Ash who was pretending to read a card that had already been played she stifled a yawn.

"Right if you all go and get a drink you can tell us all about it" replied Jill

"I don't want a drink" replied Katie she was about to say something else but Jonathon butted in

"That's a good idea I'm really thirsty, let's go" He said taking Katie's arm and marching her to the kitchen

"OUCH, what did you do that for" said Katie rubbing her arm

"Ash" was all Jonathon said

"Yeah Katie, think of Ash she exactly hasn't had much fun lately" added Tom

"Sorry" replied Katie

Meanwhile in the front room

"Right bed young lady, we will finish this off tomorrow" said Jill

"Night" Ash said getting up and giving them both a kiss goodnight

"Sweet dreams" said Gordon and Jill as she went through the door

They then put the game in a safe place and went through to the kitchen

"So how was your day" asked Gordon

"It was great" said Katie

"Yeah we met up with a lot of people we haven't seen for a while" added Tom

"Jonathon did James find you" asked Jill

"Yeah he did thanks mum" replied Jonathon

Jill and Gordon stayed up for another half an hour listen to their stories of the day and then decided to call it a night the others stayed up long into the night talking about the day and what they had all planned for tomorrow.


	42. Chapter 42

The following morning Jill and Gordon came downstairs to a messy kitchen

"Gordon, this is getting beyond a joke" said Jill

"I know I will have a word with them later" replied Gordon sitting down with his breakfast and picking up the paper

Jill had finished clearing away the mess and was just about to sit down when she heard someone coming down the stairs

"Morning" said Ash

"Morning sweetheart what can I get you" replied Jill

"It's alright sit down and have yours" replied Ash getting herself a glass of orange

Jill sat down and started eating

"So what time are you going out today" asked Gordon

"After lunch" replied Ash

"And remember come straight to the hospital after" replied Gordon

"Yes Dad" replied Ash stifling a yawn

"Are you alright" asked Jill

"You're not in pain again" asked Gordon putting the paper down

"No, I'm just worried about my results, promise" replied Ash which was the truth she was worried that she had let them down after all the mucking around they had done with their shifts to make sure she could still do her exams.

"You are to call if you are" replied Gordon

"Don't worry you will have done great" added Jill

"Thanks mum" replied Ash

For Ash the morning seemed to go by so slowly once Jill and Gorgon had left for work and she had cleared away their breakfast things, she had gone upstairs to get ready which hadn't taken long as she had done most of it the night before.

It was mid morning before the others had gotten out of bed Ash hadn't seen them she only heard the noise they were making downstairs and then the slam of the front door as they made their way out for another day of fun.

It was finally lunchtime she made her way downstairs and sighed as she enter the kitchen she now knew how her mum felt the others must of been running late again she thought as there were empty plates and glasses on the kitchen table and one of them had managed to leave the milk out on the side again.

She went to the bread bin which was empty

"Thanks guys" Ash said out loud to herself

She then went to the fridge and a smile spread across her face in there was a sandwich which Jill must have left her

She sat down and ate her sandwich, then looked at her watch if she was quick she would be able to tidy the kitchen again before she left or at least most of it. She had thrown the milk out, wiped down the sides and had done the washing up but that was it the bus would be here in five minutes she quickly dried her hands and put her shoes on and grabbing her bag and coat ran out the door and all the way to the bus stop.

It was a short journey to school, she hadn't been here for what seemed like an age she drew a deep breath and walked through the gates she was hoping a lot of people would've gone in early and would now be at the beach having a good time.

For once she was right it was just a couple of teachers in the hall she made her way over

"Hello Aisling how are you" one of them asked while looking for the envelope there wasn't a lot left so it didn't take long

"I'm getting there" replied Ash

"Well take care" replied the teacher handing the envelope across

"Thank you, you too" replied Ash stuffing it in her bag and making a quick get away

She waited nervously at the bus stop for five minutes not wanting to bump into anyone and have to explain why she couldn't go to the beach or into town with them.

Once in town she went straight into the shop she needed and purchased the frame she was glad she didn't have to take this back on the bus it was really awkward. Ash made her way to the hospital she was nearly there when she met matron who was also on her way in

"Hello Ash what have you got there" asked Matron

"Hello, it's the frame" replied Ash walking to matron who was waiting for her to catch up

"For your parents present" asked Matron

"Yes, it's nearly finished, I might give it early" replied Ash

"Ohh, I would love to see it once it's all done" replied Matron

"You should come around" said Ash

"That would be lovely" replied Matron

"Ash" shouted James, Jonathon's friend running towards them

"Hi James" said Ash

"I'll leave you two, too it" said Matron

"Yes I will let you know when you can see it" replied Ash

Matron made her way in and found both Jill and Gordon waiting at reception

"She won't be long she's just outside talking to James I think" said Matron to the pair of them

"We we're not" started Gordon

"Of course not" replied Matron walking up the corridor

"See I told you nothing to worry about" replied Jill with a smile

"Yes, well early days" replied Gordon

Meanwhile back outside

"Ash, are you coming with us to the beach party tonight" asked James

"What party" asked Ash she knew she wouldn't be allowed but this was giving her valuable seconds to come up with an excuse

"It's a mates birthday party only the others were suppose to ask you last night and then I saw you just now and thought well" explained James

"Well I can't tonight but maybe next time" replied Ash

Before anything else could be said sister Brigid had come along unbeknown by Ash and quickly put her bike against the wall she then ran over and grabbed Ash by the arm leading her way from James and into the hospital.

"Ouch, stop it your hurting me" said Ash trying to break free she flung the frame at James who took it quickly

"This is what I was on about" said sister going through the doors to reception

"Stop it" whinged Ash

"I will not stop it, not when you are still doing this" replied Sister

"Sister" said Gordon

"Mum" cried Ash still trying to get free

"What's going on" said Gordon

"I found this one talking to" started Sister when Ash butted in

"I was talking to James"

"We know" said Jill

"Matron told us" said Gordon

Sister let her grip slip on Ash who ran into Jill's arms

"Mum" sobbed Ash

"Aisling I'm so sorry" tried Sister

"It's alright sweetheart" soothed Jill while directing her towards her office

Jill sat her down and then told her she would be back in a minute.

Jill made her way back to reception where Gordon and Sister Brigid were still stood in silence.

The reception doors opened and a rather worried James came walking through; Jill gave a smile trying to make him feel at little more at ease

"Hello James what can I do for you" Jill asked

"I'm sorry to interrupt but this is Ash's" He replied giving Jill the package

"Thank you James" said Jill taking it from him

"Is she alright, I didn't mean any harm I was just asking about tonight" asked James

"Yes, she'll be fine, what about tonight" asked Gordon

"If she was going to the party with the others" said James

"What party?" asked Gordon

"It doesn't matter she said no anyway" replied James

"Can you tell her I'm sorry" he added before leaving

They waited for a minute before they started. Jill lent the package against reception

"So what did you think was going on" asked Gordon

"I thought he was... I don't know" said sister

"What did you mean this is what I was on about" asked Jill

"Well" started Sister starting to feel rather interrogated

Jill and Gordon hadn't even started yet they had only asked two simple questions and had gotten no answers yet

"Did you tell her she would turn out like Moria" asked Jill getting angry

"Well, it's not that simple you see" replied Sister

"A simple yes or no will do" said Gordon starting to raise his voice

With all the noise going on Ash poked her head out of Jill's office door and matron walked down towards reception to see what the commotion was all about she got as far as Jill's office

"Sorry it's my fault" replied Ash quickly getting matron up to speed

"I don't think so, I think sister has more to do with this than you think" replied Matron walking on towards the noise

"Doctors, Sister Brigid, what's going on" asked Matron

"Sorry" replied Gordon

"We'll have to sort this out later" replied Jill

"I have to see Aisling" said Sister

"Ohhh, no you don't" said Gordon forcefully. It even took Jill by surprise

"You don't go anywhere near her until we have the answers we need and even then" said Gordon

"But doctor" pleaded sister looking from Jill to matron hoping they would change Gordon's mind

"I'm sorry sister but Gordon's right" said Matron

"Yes, sorry come to the house at about seven we can talk then" said Jill

The three of them stood in silence as they watched sister leave the building

"Gordon" said Jill

"Sorry, it's just if that's true" said Gordon

"I know" replied Jill giving him a hug

"I thought" he started

"I know me too" replied Jill

"Matron I know it's late to ask but would you mind" started Gordon

"No of course not, I think it would be a good idea" said Matron

"How do you do that" asked Jill

"Years of practice" replied Matron

Jill picked up the package and followed the others along the corridor they stopped outside Jill's office Ash was sat in there flipping the envelope over and over in her hands

"I believe this is yours" said Jill placing the package on the desk

"Thank you" replied Ash

"So come on were all dying here how did you do" asked Jill

"I don't know" replied Ash

"What do you mean you don't know" asked Matron

"I'm too scared, what if I've let you down" replied Ash putting the envelope down

"Ash sweetheart, you could never let us down" replied Jill

"I'll come and find you when I've finished" said Matron

"Yes thank you matron" replied Gordon

"So come on then open it" said Gordon

Ash took a deep breath and opened the envelope, Jill took Gordon's hand and squeezed it

"I'm so sorry" said Ash mucking around throwing the letter towards Jill

"I'm sure it's alright you can always take them again" said Gordon

"You little...come here well done" said Jill

"Jill" said a shocked Gordon Jill showed him the letter

"See what did we tell you" said Jill

"You" said Gordon giving her a hug

She had passed all her O levels with a couple of B's the rest were all A's

"That's great we will have to celebrate" said Gordon

"Right wait here, I won't be long I've just got to do my ward round and then we can go home" said Jill

"Okay mum but we need to go shopping on the way home" replied Ash

"What for" asked Gordon

"We need milk and bread the others used it all" replied Ash

"You found your lunch in the fridge" asked Jill

"Yes thanks mum" replied Ash


	43. Chapter 43

Ash sat there patiently while Jill saw to her ward round, Gordon had also gone off to go through some paperwork with matron. They had left the door open and Ash could hear Lizzie busy typing

"Hello Sister" Lizzie said as sister Brigid came back through the door

"Hello Lizzie is she still here" asked Sister

"Who" asked Lizzie

"Aisling of course" said Sister as if she was suppose to know

"No she left not long ago" said Lizzie doing as the doctors had asked her

"Don't lie to me Lizzie Hopkirk" replied Sister going towards Jill's office the last place she had seen Aisling go

"Ohhhh lord" sighed Lizzie she acted quickly putting both the doctor's lights up

Ash didn't have enough time to react to get out of the office but she hid in the corner behind the screen hoping she wouldn't come in that far and would think it was empty

"Aisling come out I can see you" bluffed Sister

Ash didn't move she even held her breath she heard Sister come into the office and stop, she then heard the door close and footsteps go towards Gordon's office

Meanwhile Jill was doing her ward round when one of the nurses came running over to her

"Sorry Doctor your lights are up" said the nurse

"What now" sighed Jill looking up she saw Gordon's were up as well

Jill handed over the notes and ran towards the office where Matron and Gordon were

"Quick Gordon are lights are up" said Jill poking her head in not waiting she carried on down the corridor she reached reception not realising sister was not that far away

"Yes Lizzie" puffed Jill

"Its sister she's here" replied Lizzie

"I didn't know what to do" she added

"Where did she go" asked Jill

"Towards your office" replied Lizzie by this time Gordon had arrived

"What is it" he asked

"She came back" said Jill

"Where is she now" asked Gordon

"I don't know" replied Lizzie

"Right let's go to your office" said Gordon

They opened the door to find it empty or so they thought

"Gordon, what now" asked Jill

"Mum, dad" said Ash getting up and poking her head around the screen

"Ohh thank goodness" said Jill

"Mummm" replied Ash moving towards her

"It's alright your safe now" said Gordon almost saying it to tell himself as much as them

"What happened" asked Gordon

"I heard her come in and hid, I thought she had found me, but then the door shut and she went across the corridor" said a shaken Ash

"Right stay here" said Gordon

"No dad" said Ash clearly worried

"It's alright your safe here with mum" replied Gordon

"Gordon" said Jill shaking her head

"Alright are you ready to go home" asked Gordon

"No, I had one patient left" replied Jill

Jill calmly sat Ash down and left her with Gordon while she went back to the ward she finished her round and went back to her office looking in every doorway as she went

"Right ready" said Jill collecting her things

"Any sign" asked Gordon

Jill simply shook her head just then they heard footsteps coming down the corridor and there was sister Brigid. Jill and Gordon instinctively moved to block her doorway

"You can't stop me from seeing her" said Sister trying to get by

"No but I can, I want nothing more to do with you" replied Ash from behind her parents

"Aisling" pleaded sister

"Mum, can we go now" asked Ash ignoring her aunt

"Yes of course" replied Jill

Gordon took the package from her as she went past and took them to Jill's car sister kept following

"Aisling please" pleaded sister as Ash shut the car door

"See you at home" Jill said to Gordon giving him a peck on the cheek

"Aisling" shouted Sister trying to get in front of the car Gordon was holding her back

Jill pulled away from the hospital and looked in her mirrors to see sister Brigid going towards her bike.

"Mum" said Ash pulling Jill out of her thoughts

"Yes" replied Jill

"You need to go the other way" said Ash

"What" replied Jill still half concentrating on what was going on in her mirror

"The shopping" replied Ash

"Ohh your dad is getting that" replied Jill


	44. Chapter 44

They spent the rest of the journey in silence when they arrived home Jill suddenly said

"Right I want you to go straight upstairs and stay there"

"Why" asked Ash

"Please I haven't got time to explain" said Jill ushering Ash as quickly as possible towards the door which had just been opened by Katie

"Hi Mum, Ash" said Katie

"Hi" replied Ash taking her shoes off and taking the package from Jill

"Hi Katie, can you ring your Dad for me and where are your brothers" said Jill

"In the garden" said Katie while picking up the phone and dialling the royal

Jill made her way through to the back door

"Boy's" shouted Jill

"Hi mum" said the boys running over

"What's wrong" asked Jonathon

"Mum" shouted Katie

"I'm just coming, I'll explain in a minute can you come in and lock the back door please" said Jill going to the phone

Katie went through to the kitchen

"What's going on" Tom asked

"I don't know, she sent Ash straight upstairs and told me to phone dad" said Katie moving to the door to eaves drop on the conversation

Tom went to say something but Katie told him to be quiet by putting her finger to her lips. It was too late anyway Jill was already saying goodbye and putting the phone down Katie quickly moved and sat down at the table.

"Mum what's wrong" said Tom

"Right this is going to have to be quick but I need your help" said Jill

"Mum you're scaring us" replied Jonathon

"Sorry, sweetheart" replied Jill taking a seat

"Well it all started with Ash being caught by Sister talking to James outside the Royal" stated Jill she told them the whole story

"So Sister was really trying to take her" said Katie

"So what can we do" said Tom

"I'm not going to let her anywhere near us" added Jonathon

"All I need you to do is stay here until your dad gets here" said Jill

"Is that why you sent Ash upstairs you think she is coming here" asked Tom

"Yes, we asked her to come here to explain herself" said Jill but before anymore could be said there was a knock at the door

"I'll get it" said Jonathon

"Now, go upstairs with your sister please" said Jill

No one moved

"I'll stay with mum, you two go upstairs" said Jonathon

Everyone nodded Jill waited until Katie and Tom were both upstairs and Jonathon was in the front room before she opened the front door

"Where is she" said Sister

"Sorry Sister she's not here you're early" replied Jill

"I know she's here you can't stop me from seeing her" replied Sister

"Ohh yes I can and I will if it is in her best interest" replied Jill

By this time Jonathon had come out of the front room

"Aisling" shouted Sister

There was no reply

"See mum told you she wasn't here now kindly leave" replied Jonathon

"I'm not going anywhere until I see her" Replied Sister

"Aisling" Sister shouted

"You will have a long wait" replied Jonathon

"Where is she" asked Sister

"None of your business" replied Jonathon

"Jonathon" said Jill

"Sorry mum" replied Jonathon going back into the front room

Jill turned her attention back to Sister Brigid

"Like I said we were not expecting you yet, so she's not here" said Jill

There was silence between the two of them

"Your more than welcome to come in Gordon should be home soon" said Jill

"Where is she, I need to see her first" said Sister

"She is out with friends celebrating her results, I don't know where they were going" lied Jill

"I think I will go and see if I can find her first, see you later" replied Sister

Sister went down the drive collected her bike and glanced up at the bedroom windows for any sign that she was there.

Back at the house Jill shut the door and lent her head against the cool glass and took a deep breath she was close to tears she was so angry, she hadn't even asked how she had done

"Mum" said Jonathon

"What's wrong" he asked when he saw she was upset he looked at the top of the stairs where the others had collected and shrugged his shoulders

"She didn't even ask about how she had done" said Jill not knowing the others were at the top of the stairs

Ash came down the stairs and gave her mum a hug

"I'm so sorry baby girl" whispered Jill

"Mum it's not your fault" said Ash

"Anyway it's her loss" added Ash

They heard Gordon's car pulling in the drive way

"Right haven't you lot got a party to get ready for" said Jill

"We are not going we're staying here" said Tom

"So come on then how did you do" asked Katie to Ash as they all went through to the front room

Ash told them her results

"Ohhh my god that's brilliant" said Jonathon giving her a hug

"Be careful" said Jill worried he was squeezing to hard

"Yeah well done Sis" said Katie also giving her a hug

"Congrats" said Tom giving her a squeeze

"Be careful" said Jill for a second time

"Yes listen to your mother" said Gordon who had been stood in the doorway watching it all unfold

"Dad, its good news isn't it" said Tom

"Yes we will have to celebrate but not tonight" said Gordon

"Jill can I have a word please" said Gordon Jill followed him to the kitchen they were in there a good half an hour talking.


	45. Chapter 45

Jill had told him about what had happened with Sister and they were trying to come up with a plan to keep Ash safe while she was here

Meanwhile the Kids had come up with a plan of their own now they just had to execute it. The phone rang Jonathon answered

"Ash it's for you" said Jonathon

"Hello" said Ash

"Hello Ash" said Bunty down the other end of the phone

"Hello Nan" replied Ash

"So how did you do" asked Bunty

"A couple of B's and the rest are A's" said Ash

"Fantastic I bet mum and dad are pleased" replied Bunty she could hear here relaying the results to Harold at the other end

"Yes they are" replied Ash

"Grandad say's hello and well done, we will see you soon, can I speak to mum please" asked Bunty

"Nan" asked Ash

"Yes" replied Bunty

"Can I come round and see you tonight" asked Ash

"Yes of course you can" replied Bunty

"Thanks nan" replied Ash she then turned towards the kitchen

"Mum, Nan's on the phone and she wants to talk to you" said Ash

"Okay" said Jill getting up and going to the phone

Ash waited in the kitchen with Gordon while Jill was on the phone which wasn't long

"Right Ash can you leave us please we have things to discuss" said Gordon

"About that I have a solution" said Ash

"Go on" said Jill

"Well I know the others are going to the party and I don't really feel like going with them and I didn't think I would really be allowed, and seeing as you don't really want me here while you talk to her, I asked Nan and Grandad if I could go there until it's over" stated Ash

"I don't know" said Jill

"Think about it. You know where I am and who I'm with and you know I'm not doing anything I shouldn't be" said Ash

When they didn't say anything else Ash added

"You can phone when it's safe for me to come back and it's only a short bus journey"

"It's better than anything we've come up with" said Gordon

"One condition one of us drops you off and picks you up" said Jill

The others came in the kitchen and were finally persuaded to go to their party Ash had been asked to stay behind. Jill and Gordon were asking her lots of questions trying to get her side of the story

The questions were getting harder and harder to answer and she was getting nervous about how they were taking the answers she could see Jill was getting upset and frequently looking at her watch which was making Ash more upset.

The last question that they asked was

"So what did Sister say to you that day in my office" asked Jill

"Well" said Ash taking a deep breath before carrying on

"It all happened when you left your office to go and deal with the emergency. I pulled out a couple of books and started to revise when Sister Brigid came along and made a comment about no-one telling her I was there, so I told her we would be going soon but you had been called away. She then glanced at your desk and the paperwork and then at the books I had in my hands."

"I told her I was revising and started to pretend to read when she walked in and then sat down in mum's seat. She started talking about Moria and my dad. She told me she caught me talking to some boy's a few days before, but I promise I was only talking to some of Jonathon's friends who were asking how he was doing and when he was going to be back."

Ash took a deep breath and a sip of tea

"It's alright your doing really well" said Jill

"Sorry" said Ash putting her cup back down on the table

"She told me that if I carried on the way I was flirting and wearing the clothes I was wearing that I would end up like Moria. She told me about Moria and how she got pregnant by a married man who was a pillar of the community and already had a family, and if I wasn't careful I would end up with a baby and a family that doesn't want to know" said Ash

"We would never leave you" said Gordon who had been quiet throughout this and was getting angrier that sister could ever have said anything like this. Although thinking about it when Moria wanted an abortion Sister bullied her out of it and then bullied her into giving the baby up and that was the reason Moria had run away.

Ash carried on telling them her side of the story

"So she told me I had to go away on holiday with her so she could teach me to be a better person and more like her, otherwise you wouldn't want me once I finished school because I was behaving just like Moria and not like a responsible adult"

They sat in silence while Jill and Gordon took all this in

"I'm sorry I was confused I felt like I wasn't wanted and I didn't know what to believe, what was real I was confused with who I was. I'm sorry I should've talked to you sooner" said Ash tears streaming down her face

"Baby girl" said Jill getting up and wiping away her tears

"It's not your fault" added Gordon also getting up

"Right time to get going" said Jill

"I just need to grab my bag" replied Ash

There was a knock at the door everyone stood still, Gordon answered the door


	46. Chapter 46

Everyone breathed a sigh of relief when they found it was matron

"Right we have to get going now" said Jill

"Hello Matron, if you get a chance it's on my desk, see you later" whispered Ash to matron so Jill and Gordon couldn't hear

"I'll be back in a minute" said Jill

With that Jill and Ash left, Gordon went to make Matron a drink and Matron went to have a look at the collage she was busy looking at it when Katie popped her head around the door frame

"Hello Matron" said Katie

"Hello Katie, Ash said I could have a look, it really is very good" replied Matron

"Yes it is she has a real talent" replied Katie

"Do you know when she is going to give it to them" asked Matron

"No, no idea, why" asked Katie

"I've had an idea" replied Matron

"Leave her a note" said Katie passing a note pad and pen

Matron scribbled a note down for Ash telling her to give her a call because she had an idea and then followed Katie downstairs

Matron was sat in the front room talking to Jonathon who was waiting for the other two. Tom was in the Kitchen with Gordon who was making drinks and Katie had gone back upstairs looking for her other shoe.

Gordon had just taken the drinks through when there was a knock at the door Katie who had now found her other shoe which was under her bed came running down the stairs

"I'll get it" she puffed

Katie opened the door

"Hello, come on in they are in the front room" she said

Sister Brigid made her way to the front room and quickly scanned the room

"Is she here" sister asked

"Come on you two let's go, see you later dad, matron, sister" said Katie giving Gordon a kiss

"Yeah see you later" added the boy's

"Have a good time" said Gordon

"Where is she" said Sister getting impatient

"She's not here" said Gordon

"Where is she I need to talk to her" replied Sister

"We need to talk first, can I get you a drink Jill shouldn't be long" replied Gordon doing his best to stay calm

He didn't wait for a reply her went back into the kitchen to make her a drink he was stood by the kettle and clenched his fists he was so angry how can she come in here demanding to see her when she had caused all this damage, he was also angry with himself for not noticing it sooner

The door opening and the kettle flicking off brought him out of his thoughts he made the drinks and then followed Jill through to the front room

They were in there for a good hour but were getting nowhere Sister was either not answering the question or was not giving any conclusive answers

Matron butted in

"Gordon, Jill can I have a word with you" said Matron

"Yes" replied Jill

The three of them got up and moved into the kitchen slightly closing the door behind them

"I don't think you are going to get the answers you were hoping for" said Matron

"What do you suggest" said Gordon

"I can't let her anywhere near Ash until we get some answers" said Jill

"Maybe she needs to hear it from Ash" said Matron

"No Ash is still too vulnerable" said Gordon

"I don't think she will tell you what you need to hear" replied Matron

"Give it one more try for tonight then if she won't talk, I'll talk to Ash" said Jill

They walked back into the front room Sister was now up and had a photo of Ash in her hands

"Right you have one more chance tell us the truth" said Gordon

"Sister it is for the best we get this sorted out now for Ash's sake" added Jill taking the frame from her and placing it back where it belonged

"Yes the sooner it's sorted the better" added Matron

"Well I don't know what to say that I haven't already" replied Sister

Gordon went to say something but Jill got there first

"Well just tell us what you can remember and we can take it from there" said Jill

They all sat back down in their seats

They had been sat back down for another two hours and it was getting really late but at least sister was now answering their questions

"Right that's enough for tonight it's already half ten" said Jill

"Matron, Can I give you a lift home" she added

"Yes that would be lovely" replied Matron

"Can I see her now" asked Sister

"No we still have more questions" replied Gordon

"Can I give you a lift home too Sister" said Jill giving Matron her coat

"No thank you I've got my bike" replied Sister knowing she was beat she got her coat and went out the front door

"Can we finish this tomorrow lunch time" asked Sister

"Yes tomorrow" said Jill and Gordon

"Gordon can you phone that I am on my way" said Jill

"Yes of course" said Gordon he waved them off and then went and phoned Bunty when he had finished he then went and collected their cups and washed them up

The others came in

"Hi dad, how did it go" asked Jonathon

"Getting there, you're back early" replied Gordon

"Yeah it's getting really cold" said Tom


	47. Chapter 47

Meanwhile Jill had dropped Matron off and had just arrived at her mum and dad's house she knocked on the door

"Jill" said Harold

"Dad is she ready" said Jill

"She's outside" said Harold

"What" said Jill knowing she only had a t-shirt and her coat on

"We tried, we couldn't get her to come in" replied Harold

"She just kept mumbling it was all her fault" added Bunty

"What's she going on about" said Harold

"It's a long story and its late come by tomorrow and we can talk" said Jill going out the back door the wind was really picking up

"Sweetheart, ready to go" said Jill making Ash jump

"Yeah" replied Ash

"You're freezing" said Jill gently rubbing her arms and directing her towards the door at the same time

"Bye nan, granddad, thanks for having me" said Ash giving them a kiss on the way through to the front door

"Bye Ash, take care" said Harold and Bunty

"Bye mum, dad and thanks" said Jill

"Bye, Jill, drive safely" replied Harold and Bunty

They got into the car

"How was your night" asked Jill

"Quiet, how was yours" replied Ash

"Slow to start off, but we are starting to get somewhere" replied Jill

"Starting" asked Ash

"Yes she is starting to get to the point" replied Jill

"Is she still there" asked Ash slightly panicked

"No, she has gone for tonight but she will be back tomorrow lunch time" replied Jill as she pulled into the drive way

Ash looked around nervously as she got out the car

"Ash, are you alright" asked Jill

Ash nodded and then looked around quickly as she heard a noise behind her

Jill was already at the door

"Come on slow coach" Jill said opening the door

"Coming" replied Ash running towards the door

They made their way into the front room

"Hi guy's how was the party" asked Ash

"To tell you the truth it was pretty boring you had a lucky escape" said Katie

"Right go and get into some warm clothes" said Jill to Ash

Ash left the room and went upstairs she could hear the others telling Jill about how boring the party had been but it all sounded like fun to her. That just proved how fun her life had been these past few weeks.

Jill went through to the kitchen to make herself and Ash a hot drink the others following her wanting to know what was happening

Gordon stepped in and told them

"We want to talk to Ash first"

"That well then" replied Tom

"We will tell you everything after but it's only fair if we talk to Ash first" replied Jill

"Now, I'm going to check on Ash, goodnight" added Jill

"Night mum" replied Katie, Tom and Jonathon

Jill picked up the drinks and went up to Ash's room

"Can I come in" asked Jill

Ash quickly placed the collage under her bed and seeing the note for the first time, folded it and put it in her pocket

"Yes" replied Ash opening the door

Jill put the drinks down and placed her hand on Ash forehead

"Mum" said Ash moving away

"Right sit down" said Jill putting her hand on Ash's forehead again, once Jill was happy she handed Ash her drink and sat down next to her

"Right about tomorrow" started Jill

"Knock, knock, can I come in" asked Gordon

Jill looked at Ash who nodded and put her drink down

Gordon made his way in and sat on the chair that Ash had pulled out for him

"What's going on" asked Gordon trying to get up to speed

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to clear my head I didn't realise how long I had been out there" said Ash thinking that was what Gordon was on about

"What are you going on about" asked Gordon

"I hadn't told your dad yet" replied Jill

"Told me what" said Gordon concerned now

"When I went to pick Ash up I found out she had been outside for most of the time she had been there" said Jill

Gordon looked at Ash

"Why, would you do that" asked Gordon

"I don't know I guess talking about it I had it all on mind again and I am still trying to make sense of it all, I'm sorry I didn't realise it was that late if I had I would of gone inside" said Ash looking down and playing with a hair band that was around her wrist.

Jill put an arm around her

"We are sorry too, we should never of have, to have asked you those questions" said Jill

"It's not your fault" replied Ash

"We feel we are partly to blame" replied Gordon

"Why" asked Ash

There was silence between them

"You can't know what she was like when you weren't there" said Ash

"Well we feel like we should've done more" replied Jill

"You can't change her" replied Ash picking up her drink and taking a sip of tea

Jill and Gordon looked at each other

"Sweetheart, about tomorrow" said Jill changing the subject

"I don't know why you are bothering she isn't going to change" replied Ash

"Ash" said Gordon

"Sorry, I'm just fed up of making sure she is happy with everything I do" replied Ash

"Well she is coming here tomorrow" said Gordon

"Look we are all tired, let's finish this in the morning when we have all had time to think" said Jill trying to be diplomatic

"Yes well it is late" agreed Gordon

"Night then" said Ash

"Night sweetheart" replied Gordon and Jill


	48. Chapter 48

The following morning Jill and Gordon were sat at the kitchen table having their breakfast and discussing yesterday, Ash came down the stairs and walked into the kitchen

"Morning" said Ash

"Morning" replied Jill and Gordon

"Before you say anything, I'm sorry about last night and the way I was it wasn't very helpful" said Ash

"About that we are sorry too" replied Jill

"So did she tell you much" asked Ash

"What she has told us has been the same as you so far, but she doesn't like answering about what happened in mum's office" replied Gordon

"So what now" asked Ash

"Well are you happy to be here while she's here today" asked Jill

"Yeah, but would it be better if I wasn't here" replied Ash

"I don't know what do you think Gordon" asked Jill

"Well it might be better if you were not here to start off with" said Gordon picking up the paper

That was the end of the conversation. Ash had finished her breakfast and had gone back upstairs to get ready and Jill was tidying away their breakfast things.

It was just after ten in the morning, Jill was busy doing housework, Gordon was in the office doing paperwork. Ash had just come downstairs to sit outside and read her book and the others were still not up yet. When there was a knock at the door

"I'll get it" shouted Ash moving towards the door she opened the door

"Hello" said Ash

"Who is it" asked Gordon poking his head around the office door

"Morning Gordon" said Harold

"Morning" replied Gordon

"How are you this morning young lady" asked Bunty following Harold in

"I'm fine Nan, how are you" replied Ash

"I'm fine thank you" replied Bunty

"Why don't you go through" said Gordon pointing towards the front room to Bunty and Harold

"Can you go and get your mother" he added to Ash

"Yes" replied Ash leaving them and going upstairs she knocked on her parents' bedroom door

"Come in" said Jill

"Nan and Grandad are here" said Ash

"Okay, I'll be down in a second can you put the kettle on please" replied Jill,

Ash nodded and went back downstairs she went to the front room

"Mum will be down in a second can I get you a drink" said Ash

"A coffee would be lovely" said Bunty

"Grandad" asked Ash

"A cup of tea please" replied Harold

"Dad" asked Ash

"Tea please" replied Gordon

Jill was just coming down the stairs when Ash left the front room

"Mum would you like a drink" asked Ash

"I'll have a coffee please, I'll give you a hand in a minute" replied Jill

"Morning" Jill said entering the front room

"Morning" replied Bunty and Harold

"So what's been going on" asked Bunty getting straight to the point

Jill looked at Gordon and then sat down next to him

"Where to start" said Jill

"Well I suppose" said Gordon thinking about it

At that moment Ash came through the door carrying a tray full of drinks Jill got up and took the tray from her

"Thanks sweetheart" Jill said while putting the tray down

"I'll leave you to it" said Ash going back towards the door

Jill and Gordon waited until they heard Ash going up the stairs and then they told Bunty and Harold everything that they had found out that had happened all the way up until what had happened yesterday.

Harold and Bunty had sat there in silence for the last hour and a half listening trying to take in everything Jill and Gordon were saying

Ash came down the stairs and into the front room

"Sorry to interrupt but I'm going now. What time do you want me back" said Ash

"Just after two, that should give us enough time" replied Gordon

"Where are you going" asked Jill

"I don't know I was just going to go for a walk and see where I end up" replied Ash

Bunty could see the panic in Jill's eyes

"Your Grandad and I were going to go shopping and have a spot of lunch out you could come with us" said Bunty

Ash looked at Jill and saw the panic go from her eyes

"Are you sure you want me" said Ash

"Yes" said Harold

"Okay, I'll just go and get my bag" said Ash running back up the stairs and getting her bag

"Thanks Mum, Dad" said Jill

"Our pleasure" replied Harold

"Just promise to get this sorted once and for all" added Bunty

"Promise" replied Gordon

Ash came bounding down the stairs trying to hide the pain she was in

"Ready" asked Bunty

"Ready" replied Ash

"Bye Mum, Dad" added Ash giving them both a peck on the cheek

"Bye and be good" replied Jill

"Bye" added Gordon


	49. Chapter 49

Jill and Gordon watched them leave and then went through to tidy up fifteen minutes later there was a knock at the door it was both Matron and Sister. Gordon let them in and got them settled in the front room

"Before you ask, no she is not here but she will be back shortly so let's get this sorted before she gets back once and for all" Gordon stated

No one said anything they all took the same positions as the night before. Jill came in with a tray of drinks and nibbles. By this time the others had woken up and come downstairs

"Were off see you later" said Tom

"Not to late we've got that special dinner planned remember" said Gordon

"No we won't be long we just wanted to give you some space and we want to get a little present as well" replied Jonathon

"That's a good idea" replied Jill

They heard the front door close and then they started this time it didn't take long to get all the facts what they had said must have finally gotten through to Sister their only problem now was that Ash had been telling the truth and that Sister had admitted to saying these things, but she could see nothing wrong with it.

Meanwhile Ash had been shopping and was sat having a light lunch and a chat with her grandparents.

Back at the Ormerod residence

"I don't understand the problem" said Sister for the third time

"The problem is that you hurt Ash" said Jill looking at the clock and noticing the time she would be home any moment now

"Your talk was the reason she ran away" added Gordon

Sister seemed to ignore what Gordon had just told her

"I was making her aware of her faults so she would be a better person" replied Sister

"That's not you decision" replied Matron

"Well how is she ever going to follow in my footsteps if not" replied Sister

"That is for Ash to decide what she wants to be" said Gordon

Just then they heard Harold's car pull in the drive

"If you can wait here we have to talk to Ash alone" said Jill

Jill and Gordon got up and went to meet Ash at the front door

"Hello sweetheart can we have a quick word in the kitchen" said Gordon

Ash nodded

"Mum, Dad how was she" asked Jill

"Quiet" replied Harold

"How did it go" asked Bunty

"She was telling the truth" said Jill

"Go on through Matron and Sister are in there, we won't be long" Jill added

Harold and Bunty went through to the front room and were sat having a conversation with Matron, while Jill went through to the kitchen

"Sweetheart, she told us everything" started Jill

"And" said Ash

"We are very sorry we ever doubted you" replied Gordon

"I don't blame you" said Ash

"Is she still here" asked Ash

"Yes" replied Jill

"She wants to see you" added Jill

After a few seconds for it to sink in

"I don't want to see her" said Ash

Sister was bored of waiting and came to the kitchen

"Aisling, can we talk" said Sister

"No, I've got nothing to say to you" said Ash

"Aisling, please" replied Sister

"Just give her time" said Gordon

"She will come to you when she is ready to listen" added Jill

Sister tried to talk to her one last time

"Aisling, please I only want what is best for you" pleaded Sister

"Then leave me alone, to get on with my life" replied Ash

Ash was starting to get frustrated with having to repeat herself and the pain was getting on her nerves now. Absent mindedly she started rubbing her side. Jill noticed this and nodded to Gordon

"Right I think it is best if you leave now" said Gordon forcefully

"But I haven't talk to her yet" replied Sister

"She will come and find you when she is ready" replied Gordon guiding her from the kitchen into the hallway

"Bye Ash, see you soon" said Sister

"Bye" said Ash after being prompted by Jill

Gordon saw Sister out and then went through to the other guests to see if they needed any drinks meanwhile in the kitchen

"How long have you been in pain" Jill asked

"I'm not" Ash lied

Jill looked Ash in the eyes and then looked at her hand which was still rubbing her side

"Ohhh that pain" said Ash

"Nice try, so how long" replied Jill

"All day, on and off" replied Ash quietly

"ALL DAY" shouted Jill


	50. Chapter 50

Gordon who was in the front room got up

"I'll just go and see what that is all about" he said making his way out

"What is going on in here" asked Gordon

"Well go on then tell your Dad" said Jill

"I'm sorry" said Ash

"Sorry for what" asked Gordon

There was silence between them

"Well, we haven't got all day, we have guests" said Jill

"I'm sorry, really I am I didn't want you to have to worry about me as well as what was going on" replied Ash

"Will someone please tell me what's going on" asked Gordon

Jill looked at Ash

"I've been in pain on and off all day" said Ash

There was silence while Gordon took it in. In this time Ash had gotten up and was making her way to the front room

"Hello matron" Ash smiled

"Hello, Ash, what have you done now" asked Matron

"I didn't tell them I was in pain" replied Ash taking a seat

"Why not" asked Matron

"I didn't what to burden them" replied Ash

Matron looked up and saw Jill and Gordon stood in the doorway

"Go on" Matron said

"Well I've been enough trouble what with Sister and all that mess, I didn't want them worrying about me today as well" replied Ash

"I think they would always want to know" said Harold

"Why, it's not like they can magic it away" replied Ash

"You must always tell them, there may always be something else going on" replied Matron

"Don't you think they would be less worried if you told them, at least that way they would know" added Bunty

Ash nodded

"Right can I get anyone another drink" Gordon asked

Everyone said yes, Gordon went to make the drinks

"How long have they been there" Ash asked

"Long enough" replied Jill

They sat in silence until Gordon came back with the drinks

"So what happened" asked Bunty

Jill glanced at Gordon before anything could be said Ash got up

"I think I might just go upstairs and stretch out for a bit" said Ash

"Okay, just shout if you need us" replied Jill

They sat there talking about what had gone on for about five minutes

"Actually, I might just go and check everything is ok" said Jill concerned

"Just give her some space" replied Bunty

"Yes the poor girl has been through a lot, she just needs some time" agreed Harold

Jill looked to Gordon for support but didn't get any

"I'll go, I need to ask her something anyway" said Matron getting up and leaving the room

The rest of them sat there and carried on talking

Meanwhile Matron was upstairs talking to Ash who had made room for Matron to sit down

"Did you get my note" asked Matron

"Yes, what did you have in mind" asked Ash

"Do you know where they would put it" asked Matron

"Yes there is a place in the study" replied Ash

"What have you got planned for tomorrow" asked Matron

Ash was wondering where Matron was going with all these questions

"Nothing, Mum and Dad are at work, why?" asked Ash

"Great that was my next question" replied Matron

Ash looked at Matron and could tell she was thinking this out

"Is everything all right up there" shouted Jill

"Yes" replied Ash

"We will be down in a minute" added Matron

"Right here's the plan, you put the picture in place in the morning once they have left and then you make them a nice dinner to come home to with a nice bottle of wine how does that sound so far" asked Matron

"Yeah sounds good, will you be here too" asked Ash

"No, you don't need me" replied Matron

"I know we would all like it if you were" replied Ash

"Okay then, what time" asked Matron

"Whenever suits you" replied Ash

"Right well I shall say about half four, then I can give a hand now that is sorted we better go back downstairs they will be worrying that we are getting up to no good" replied Matron getting up


	51. Chapter 51

Ash followed Matron downstairs they could still hear the adults talking in the front room about her

"Mum I cannot just leave her" said Jill

"But I think you are playing right into her hands" replied Bunty

"How, are we doing that, she is in pain and doesn't tell us, plus she is not herself" replied Jill

"Well you are giving her more attention when she doesn't tell you and when she plays up" replied Bunty

"Mum, really" replied Jill

"Yes really" replied Bunty

"Did you not listen to a word she said? She is not telling us because she doesn't want us to worry on top of everything else, how is that playing for attention" asked Jill getting annoyed

"That is what she is telling you" replied Bunty

"And how is not drawing anything normal, when have you ever seen her without a sketch pad" asked Jill

"What" Gordon said slightly shocked

"How long" he added

"I don't know, I suppose since" started Jill before being interrupted by Ash

"Since I saw how upset you were with those pictures" said Ash walking in to the front room with Matron close behind

"How did you know?" Ash asked Jill

"There is not much that gets past your mother" replied Gordon

"We didn't mean for you to stop drawing" added Jill

"I know, I just don't feel like drawing anymore" lied Ash

"You shouldn't give it up, you have such a talent" said Matron

"Thank you, but I'm going to be busy what with my studies and all" replied Ash

"So have you decided what you want to do" asked Gordon

"Yes, I want to be like you and mum, if you think I would be good enough" replied Ash

"Of course you will" said Jill getting up and giving her a cuddle

"I'm so proud of you" Jill whispered in her ear

"Right well we had better be going" said Bunty getting up

"Thank you for everything" replied Gordon following them to the hallway

"Bye, Nan, Grandad, thank you for a lovely day" added Ash giving them both a peck on the cheek

"Remember, what we said" replied Bunty to Ash. Ash nodded

"Bye Mum, Dad" added Jill

"Well I should be going too" said Matron

"If you wait a minute, I'll give you a lift" replied Gordon

"Thank-you for everything you have done" added Jill

"Bye" said Matron

"See you soon" she added

"Bye, thank you" replied Ash

"Bye" added Jill

Once the cars were out of sight Jill shut the door and went through to the kitchen to make a start on dinner. Ash lingered at the door wondering what to do finally she made up her mind

"Mum can I help" Ash asked

Before anything could be said she saw Jill stood over the sink

"Mum what's wrong" asked Ash concerned

Jill wiped away the tears and turned around

"Nothing" replied Jill

"Is it me" asked Ash

"No, it's just something your nan said" replied Jill

"Is that what you were arguing about when I came in" asked Ash

Jill didn't have to respond Ash could tell that she was right

"Mum, Nan has got it all wrong. I know that you are both there for me whenever, where ever I need you, I don't need to act up for your attention, you are the best parents ever" stated Ash

"When did you get so grown up" replied Jill opening her arms to give Ash a cuddle

"Ohhh baby girl, I just wish you told me" whispered Jill

"I promise I will from now on" said Ash

"I just didn't want you to worry, but I can see now I was wrong, sorry" Ash added

"That's alright baby girl" replied Jill

"So what can I do to help" asked Ash

"Nothing, go and rest, it's suppose to be a celebration dinner" replied Jill looking at the clock

"Mum, go on let me help, just until someone else is here it's not fair on you" pleaded Ash

"Ohh alright, if you can lay the table" replied Jill

"Yes, thanks mum" replied Ash

A few minutes later and Ash came back into the kitchen having laid the table just as Jill had told her

"Right what next" asked Ash

Jill had to think she was hoping that Gordon would have been back by now

"Right if you sit here you can start on these" said Jill putting some vegetables in front of her to peel and chop

"So what were you a Matron on about upstairs" asked Jill

"Nothing much" replied Ash

"You were up there a long time for nothing much" replied Jill

"Okay she was making sure I was alright" replied Ash

"And" Jill asked

"And I am, I just need a bit more time before I speak to Sister Brigid that's all" replied Ash

"Well don't go rushing anything, we all support you" replied Jill

"Thanks mum, where do you want these" asked Ash having done the vegetables

"Thank you, just leave them there for a minute" replied Jill

"What's next" asked Ash

"That's all to do for now" replied Jill

Just then Gordon came through the front door and went straight to the kitchen

"Right what can I do" said Gordon

"Perfect timing as always Gordon" replied Jill

"What" Gordon asked

"You've done it all haven't you" he guessed

"Yes, with help from Ash" replied Jill

"Well I will just lay the table then" replied Gordon

"Done it already" said Ash

"Well you have been busy" replied Gordon

"Would anyone like a drink" asked Jill

"I'll get them, you go and put your feet up" replied Gordon

"Mum, can we finish that game" asked Ash following Jill through to the front room

"Yes, of course" replied Jill

They were playing the game Gordon was keeping one eye on the clock

"When did the others say they would be back" Gordon asked

"They didn't say" replied Jill

"How long until dinner" asked Ash

"Not long were just waiting for the others" replied Gordon

"But if they are not here soon we will have to start without them" added Jill

Five minutes later and the game was over Jill had won

"Ash can you pack the game away please" said Jill

"Yes mum" replied Ash

"Right that's it they have had enough time let's start without them" said Gordon


	52. Chapter 52

The three of them sat down to dinner and were having a chat, they had finished eating but were still sat there talking when the phone rang Jill got up

"Weatherill" she answered

"Sorry Doctor, there has been an accident all hands needed" replied the night matron

"Okay, understood we're on our way in" replied Jill

Jill put the receiver down and went through to the dining room

"Gordon we have to go now" Jill said

"What is it" asked Gordon

"There's been an accident that's all I know" replied Jill

"Right" replied Gordon getting up

"Is there anything I can do" asked Ash

"Yes you can stay here and get a message to us that your sister and brothers have turned up" replied Jill

"You think" started Ash

"No we just need to know they are here" butted in Gordon

"Right let's get going" he added going to the door

Ash was left on her own again she was use to it by now but why tonight she was just about to open up to her parents, maybe this was a sign that she was suppose to keep it to herself.

She cleared the table and started on the washing up when the others came through the front door

"Where's mum and dad" asked Katie

"They got a call" replied Ash

"What about dinner" Tom asked

"You were late we started without you" replied Ash

"What are you doing" asked Jonathon

"Phoning mum and dad to let them know you are here" replied Ash

"Ohh hello Lizzie it's Ash, is mum or dad free" asked Ash

"I'll just have a look" replied Lizzie

Lizzie had been gone for only a minute

"Ash, are you still there" Lizzie asked

"Yes" was all Ash had time to say before Lizzie started talking again

"Good, how are you" Lizzie asked

"I'm fine thanks how are you" asked Ash

Lizzie didn't have time to reply, she heard Jill in the background

"Thanks Lizzie" said Jill taking the receiver

"Sweetheart, are you alright" asked Jill concerned

"I'm okay, the others are here" replied Ash

"Ohh, thank God" replied Jill, relieved

"Is there anything else I can do" asked Ash

"No, thank you sweetheart" replied Jill

"Bye" replied Ash

"Bye" replied Jill

"Doctor" said the night matron

"Yes, coming" replied Jill

Jill followed matron through to casualty, where she caught Gordon's eye and saw him breathe a sigh of relief

It was nearly midnight by the time they got home, Jill was silently dreading the mess she was coming home to. In her mind she could still see the plates on the table and the mess in the kitchen where the others had made themselves something to eat.

Ash however had been very busy once they had left, she had washed all of their dinner plates and then had come back downstairs once the others had finished and gone to bed and tidied up after them as well.

She then had filled the kettle, she was just about finishing and was going to make herself a hot water bottle to help ease the pain when she saw the lights from Gordon's car pull into the drive way.

Jill was the first through the door; she heard a noise in the kitchen and went straight through

"Sweetheart, are you all right" Jill asked, looking around

"I'm just a bit achy, so I thought this might help" replied Ash holding up the hot water bottle

"Let me guess while you were waiting, you just did a little tiding up" replied Jill

Ash nodded "Would you like a drink the kettles hot" Ash asked

"I think I might just go straight to bed and so should you" replied Jill

"Night mum" replied Ash

"Night dad" Ash said to Gordon going up the stairs

"Night" replied Gordon without thinking it was only when Jill followed her out of the kitchen that he did a double take; he didn't have to say anything for Jill to have to start explaining. Which she did while making drinks they then went into the front room to unwind.

They had been sat there for nearly an hour and were just about to make their way up when they heard movement upstairs.

Ash had woken with tears streaming down her face from a nightmare and a bad pain, she had knocked on her parent's door but there had been no reply so was making her way back to her room

"Sweetheart" said Jill making her way up the last few steps

"Mum" said Ash running into her arms

"It's alright your safe" added Gordon

"What is it what's wrong" asked Jill while guiding her through to her bed

"It's going to sound stupid" replied Ash

"No it's not" replied Jill

"It was a stupid dream and I was in pain" started Ash

"It's alright" replied Jill soothing her

"I'm sorry" replied Ash

"You've nothing to be sorry for" replied Gordon

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes

"So what's this all about" asked Gordon

Ash looked at her parents who looked so tired she felt she couldn't keep them up any longer

"I'm really tired do you mind if we talk about this tomorrow" asked Ash

Jill and Gordon looked at each other and nodded

"But if you change your mind you know where we are" replied Jill

"Thanks" replied Ash stifling a yawn

"Night, sweetheart sweet dreams" replied Jill

"Night" replied Ash lying down

Jill and Gordon left the room but like the first night they left the door open


	53. Chapter 53

Ash had managed to get a couple of hours sleep before the dreams had started again. She didn't go through to her parents they would be up anyway in the next couple of hours. Instead she laid there in the dark trying to make sense of everything.

It was finally six thirty she knew this because she could hear her parent's alarm clock going off, she could hear her parents moving around and mumbling to each other so she decided to get up and moving as well.

Ash had just finished getting changed and was making her bed when Jill poked her head around the door

"Are you alright" asked a surprised Jill

"Yeah, you" Ash asked

"I will be" replied Jill

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you" replied Ash

"You have nothing to be sorry for" replied Jill

"I have lots" started Ash

"No, don't go blaming yourself" replied Jill

"Everything alright" asked Gordon

"Yeah, its fine I was just saying sorry" said Ash

"You have nothing to be sorry for" replied Gordon

"See" added Jill then turning to Gordon "That was what I was just telling her"

"So what would you like for breakfast" asked Gordon doing his usual and changing the subject

"That depends on what you are offering" replied Jill following both of them downstairs

Gordon went through to the kitchen and then started opening cupboards and the fridge pretending to look for things

"Unfortunately it looks like it is cereal, cereal or toast" said Gordon

"Toast please" replied both Jill and Ash

"Coming up, can I get you any drinks" asked Gordon

"Tea would be lovely" replied Jill

"So about last night, I'm sorry, I was just being stupid" started Ash

"No, it's not stupid, with everything that's going on its understandable" replied Jill

"There you go" said Gordon putting the drinks down in front of them and giving Ash some toast

"Thanks dad" said Ash

"You're welcome, so what was it all about" asked Gordon

"Well I had promised to tell you when I was in pain, and the pain was starting to get worse" said Ash, taking a bite of toast

Gordon had now given Jill her toast and had just sat down with them. He was just about to ask Ash about her dream but she got there first

"I also promised I would tell you about my dream, but like a said it will sound stupid" said Ash taking a sip of tea. She looked at Jill and carried on

"It was similar to the one at the hospital, only I don't know where I was, I kept looking for you but I couldn't find you, the only person that I could find was Sister" said Ash

"Sweetheart" started Jill

"I know, I'm sorry, I guess I panicked a little when" butted in Ash

"When we weren't in our room" finished Jill

Ash nodded

"See I told you it was stupid" said Ash

"No, never think that" said Gordon

"So what have you got planned for today" asked Jill

"Nothing much, I thought I might go into town later and see if I can get a job" replied Ash

"I'm not sure that's such a good idea, not at the moment anyway" replied Gordon

"Why not, the others did" replied Ash

"Well you are still in a lot of pain sometimes, we don't want you pushing yourself" replied Jill

"You promised to treat me like the others" replied Ash getting mad, she knew they would try and stop her

"We are, we would say the same to them in your position" replied Gordon

"Why don't we talk about this later, when we all have had time to think about it" said Jill trying to keep the peace

"Well is there something you need done then" asked Ash

"No, I don't think so" replied Jill

Gordon looked at the clock

"Goodness is that the time, we had better be going" said Gordon getting up and going upstairs

"Thank you sweetheart, I know that wasn't easy for you" said Jill getting up and going over to Ash

"I promised" replied Ash

"Come on Jill" shouted Gordon from the hallway

"We'll be back at lunch time but if you need us call" said Jill going towards the door

Ash nodded "See you later" she added

Ash was left on her own in the kitchen she cleared the table and went upstairs her parents saying they were coming back a lunchtime had really put a spanner in the works, everything she had planned to do this morning was now put on hold until later. She decided she couldn't stay here as second longer doing nothing so decided to get the shopping done and out the way she would just have to hide it in her room and hope they don't see it.


	54. Chapter 54

Ash had been gone a good hour and had got all she had needed when she came home, the others had only just made their ways downstairs

"Ash, about yesterday" started Katie

"Forget it" butted in Ash

"We are very sorry" added Jonathon

"I said forget it" replied Ash

"What have you got there" asked Tom

"Shopping" replied Ash stating the obvious

"I know that what is it for" replied Tom

"I'm cooking dinner tonight to say sorry to mum and dad" replied Ash

"Do you want some help" asked Katie

"Later, I can't do anything now they will be back for lunch" replied Ash

"Alright, later then" replied Jonathon

"Matron's coming as well, she'll be here at about four thirty" added Ash

"You're giving them the present" replied an excited Katie

Ash nodded

When Jill and Gordon arrived home for lunch they found all the children outside in the garden, the older three were playing with a football and Ash was sat at the table reading a book

"She's still not drawing" said Gordon

"We can't force her" replied Jill

"Hi kid's" said Gordon

"Hi" they all replied

Gordon went and sat down with Ash

"Ash, we've been talking" started Gordon

"I'll go and give mum a hand" replied Ash getting up

"Ash" said Gordon

"Don't bother I know what you are going to say" replied Ash before Gordon could say anymore she made her way indoors

"Alright, sweetheart" asked Jill concerned

"Yeah, I've just come to give a hand" replied Ash

"Well if you can take these out" replied Jill giving Ash a tray of drinks

Ash took the tray of drinks out and sat down she knew Jill wouldn't be far behind her

"So how was your day" Ash asked Gordon getting in there before he could say something

"The usual" he replied

Just then Jill arrived at the table

"Come and get it" she shouted to the others

"Thanks mum, this looks great" said Jonathon

"Don't think you are getting away that easily" replied Gordon

"We are very sorry" replied Tom

"It's not just us you have to apologise to" replied Gordon

"We know we have already apologised to Ash, haven't we" replied Jonathon

"Yeah" said Ash

"Well we've discussed this and you three are not allowed out for a whole week" said Gordon

"So what are you doing this afternoon" asked Jill

"Not a lot now" replied Jonathon

"Right has everyone had enough" asked Gordon

Everyone nodded. Katie took one tray in followed by Jill

"Mum, is everything alright" Katie asked

"Yes, Ash didn't have a very good night last night that's all" replied Jill while starting the washing up

"Anything I can do" asked Katie

"Just keep an eye on her" replied Jill

"So what did you get her, she hasn't mentioned it" asked Jill

"We forgot to give it to her, we were going to give it tonight when we were all in" replied Katie

Just then Gordon came in the back door

"Right are you ready to make a move" he asked

"Yes" replied Jill drying her hands

"See you later" Jill said to Katie she then went to the door and shouted bye to the others they all waved back

"Right what do you need done" asked Tom

"Wait" replied Ash

"What?" Tom asked

"One of them will be back in thirty seconds" replied Ash

Just as she finished saying it Jill came around the side of the house

"Has anyone seen" started Jill

"These" butted in Ash holding up the keys

"Yes, thank you sweetheart" said Jill giving her a kiss on her forehead

"See you later" replied Ash

Jill went off back around the corner of the house

"That was close" said Tom

"I'll just go and check" added Jonathon

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes until Jonathon came back around the corner

"They've gone" said Jonathon

"So come on what can we do" said Tom

"Well you can hang the picture up" replied Ash

"Yes" replied both boys excited to see it they had heard so much about it but had never seen it

"I'll just go and get it" replied Ash getting up and going indoors

"Ash, are you alright" asked Katie as Ash came through the door

"Yeah, you" replied Ash not waiting for a reply she went straight to her room

Ash came back down with the frame and put it on the desk in the study and went off to find the others, who were sat outside talking

"Ash are you sure you're alright to do this, it's just mum said you didn't have a good night" asked Jonathon

"I'm fine I just had a stupid dream" replied Ash truthfully

"You know where we are" replied Katie

"Yeah, you are stuck here" replied Ash cheekily

"I thought you wanted are help" replied Jonathon jokingly

"I do, I thought I would have all day, until last night then I knew they would be back for lunch" replied Ash

"Right let's get to work then" replied Tom


	55. Chapter 55

All four of them made their way in chatting and laughing

"Right so first things first" said Katie taking control

"Picture" replied Ash

"Right where do you want it" asked Tom

"In that space in the study" replied Ash following the others through to the study and pointing to the spot

"Wow, this is amazing" said Jonathon picking it up and staring at it

"Thanks, I hope mum and dad like it half as much" replied Ash she was still rather timid of her drawings

The boys got to work

"So what can we do" asked Katie

"Lay the table, I've got some flowers for the table, I'll just go and get them" replied Ash

"You have thought of everything" replied Katie impressed

"Well it's not like I've been able to do much else" replied Ash

"Not everything, I haven't got any drink" confessed Ash

"Well let's have a look, what are we making" asked Katie

Ash reeled off what they were having, Katie thought about it for a few minutes

"Let's have a look in here" said Katie opening the cupboard

"Dad normally has a couple in the back of here, yes" added Katie

"These will be just fine" she said while taking the bottles out and putting them on the side

"I don't know, maybe we should put them back and ask dad when he gets home" replied Ash

"He won't mind" replied Katie

"I would just rather wait" replied Ash

"Okay, I'll put them back" replied Katie she knew there was more to this and didn't want to cause another argument

They finished in the dining room and shut the door just as they had

"Hey, Ash come and look at this" shouted Tom

Ash went through to the study. The boys had managed to put the picture up

"Well" asked Jonathon

"It's brilliant, thank you so much" replied Ash giving them both a hug

Just then they were interrupted by a knock at the door

"What time did you say matron was getting here" asked Tom

"About half four" replied Ash looking at her watch

"Are you expecting anyone" replied Ash nervously

"No" replied the others

"I'll get it you stay in here" replied Jonathon the others followed him out and shut the door behind them

"Hello" said Jonathon

"Hello, is this where Aisling Ormerod lives" asked a young nun

"Yes, but she's not in, can we help" asked Jonathon

"I was told to give this to her and no one else, when will she be back" replied the nun

"Not until, much later" replied Katie

"Is it from sister Brigid" asked Tom

The young nun just nodded

"Well, we are her siblings, we will keep it safe and give it to her for you" replied Jonathon

"Well I don't know I was told to make sure I put it in her hands" replied the nun

"We won't tell sister if you don't" replied Tom

"Well alright then" replied the nun handing it over

Katie took the envelope, as they shut the door, Ash opened the study door, Katie stuffed the envelope into her pocket

"Who was it?" asked Ash

"No-one" replied Tom

"Well it was a long time for no-one" replied Ash

"It doesn't matter, what needs doing now" replied Katie

"Preparing dinner" replied Ash

"Right let's get to it" replied Tom

"I've just got to get something's from upstairs" replied Ash going upstairs

"What are we going to do" asked Tom

"I say we give it to mum" replied Jonathon

"Agreed" replied Katie

"I'll go and put it somewhere safe" she added just as Ash came downstairs

"What's going on" asked Ash

"Nothing, I was just telling them what you had planned" replied Katie

Ash knew there was more to it but didn't want to cause an argument there was still lot's too do and she was starting to get a bad pain she was pushing herself too much and she knew it

An hour had passed they were nearly finished it had been a bit of luck the others being here, there was a knock at the door,

"I'll get it" said Tom making his way

"Hello" he said opening the door

"Hello, Tom" replied Matron

"Come in, we're all in the kitchen" replied Tom shutting the door behind matron and taking her coat before following her through to the kitchen

"Hello" chorused the others

"Well, well we have been busy" replied Matron

"Can I get you a drink" asked Ash

"Tea, would be lovely" replied Matron sitting down

"So what is left to do" asked Matron

"Not much, this is all ready to put in" replied Ash

"The only thing is how do I make them go in the study" added Ash

"Well we will have to think about that" replied Matron

"Well if that's all, I'm going to get changed" replied Katie giving a wink to the other two

"Yes, so are we" replied Jonathon

"Thank you, for all your help, I could not have done it without you" replied Ash

"No, problem" replied Tom

The others left, Ash and Matron on their own

Ash handed Matron her drink and sat down

"Ash what's up" asked Matron

"Nothing, I'm just thinking" replied Ash

"About what" asked Matron knowing there was more too this

"If this, is really the right time" replied Ash

"The right time for what" asked Matron

"Giving them this picture, and I just can't think of a reason to get them in there" replied Ash

"I think you are just probably just over thinking things" replied Matron

"When was the last time you were in there" asked Matron

Ash didn't know where this was going but she trusted Matron

"A couple of days ago, with mum, why?" asked Ash

"What were you doing in there" asked Matron

"Mum was keeping an eye on me, so I was reading a book" replied Ash

"Why was she keeping an eye on you?" asked Matron

"I woke up in a lot of pain, mum was on a paperwork morning so brought it here to keep an eye on me" replied Ash truthfully

"So where is the book now" asked Matron

"In my room on my bedside table" replied Ash

"Are you sure about that?" asked Matron

"Yes" replied Ash, then she thought about it for a second and clicked onto what Matron was saying

"No, to tell you the truth, I haven't seen it since that morning" replied Ash

"That's the idea" replied Matron

"I'll just go and get it" replied Ash getting up

"I won't be long" she added

Matron waited in the kitchen, two minutes later Ash came back in empty handed

"Where's the book?" asked Matron thinking she had forgotten it

"In the study, on the desk under some paperwork" replied Ash

"Right so everything is set" asked Matron

"Yes" replied Ash, thinking she should really be giving something to Matron as well for all of her help

Hey, wasn't there that picture frame she had been given for Christmas from sister Brigid at the bottom of a draw somewhere, and she had a few pictures left and the ones of the day in the forest. That would be plenty to fill it she could quickly make something up and let it dry and put it together during dinner. Yes that is what she would do. But first she needed the others to come down and talk to Matron so she had time to do all this and get changed herself.

Just then the boy's came down

"Is there anything else you want done" asked Tom

"Well, I think she would like to get changed as well" replied Matron

"Yes" added Ash

"If, I'm not down by five can you put this in the oven and give me a shout" asked Ash, pointing to what she was saying

"Yeah, but that's only fifteen minutes" replied Tom

"Well, I'll have to be quick" replied Ash running up the stairs

How did Matron do that, was she reading her mind. Ash quickly found the pictures and a piece of card which she would cut to the right size, she then found the frame at the bottom of a draw, it was a little dusty to say the least, she also found a couple of other things she had forgotten all about along with some drawings she had done a long time ago that would be perfect for this, she was laying them out just as Katie came to the door

"What are you wearing" asked Katie

"That" replied Ash pointing to the dress hanging on the back of the door

"What are you doing" asked Katie thinking now was not the time for drawing

"I forgot about Matron" replied Ash

"What about Matron?" Katie asked

"Well, thanking her for all she has done, I mean she has gone out of her way to help me and I have nothing to say thank you" replied Ash

"Would you like a hand" asked Katie

"Yes please, what do you think?" asked Ash

"I think she will love it" replied Katie

"Really" asked Ash

"Really, so what can I do?" asked Katie

"Help me to cut around these, and then I can stick them in place and leave it to dry" replied Ash

Between them they had it done in five minutes

"So what did you want" asked Ash

"To know what you were wearing, so I would know what to wear" replied Katie

"And" replied Ash

"I still don't know" replied Katie

"Well let's have a look then" replied Ash following Katie to her room

"I can't decide between this one, or this one" said Katie holding them both up against her

"That one" said Ash pointing to the one in her right hand

"Really?" asked Katie

"Yes, mum always loves you in that one" replied Ash

"This one it is then" said Katie


	56. Chapter 56

Ash went back to her room and got changed and made her way down, just in time to put the dinner in the oven which was a good thing as the boys had taken Matron outside and clearly forgotten about it.

Katie came down not long after her

"Anything else" Katie asked

"No, go and enjoy yourself" replied Ash

They both went outside

"My don't you both look pretty as a picture" said Matron

"You don't think it's too much" asked Ash

"No, not at all, your mum will like it that you have gone to all this effort" replied matron

They sat there chatting for a few minutes

"Does, anyone need a drink?" asked Ash looking at her watch, knowing she would have to put the vegetables on

No one wanted a drink so Ash went in and switched the vegetables on and then ran upstairs to see if it was dry yet. It was so she put it in the frame and took it down and put it in the study so Matron could have it at the same time.

Meanwhile Katie was telling Matron about what had happened earlier, Matron seemed to agree that giving it to Jill was the best solution.

Ash was still in the study when she heard one of the cars pull on to the drive, she made her way out shutting the door behind her and made her way back into the kitchen.

Ash was still in the kitchen checking on things when Jill and Gordon made their way in talking about their day

"Hello" shouted Gordon, shutting the door

"Hi, dad" said Ash popping her head around the door

"What's going on?" asked Jill

"Where are the others?" asked Gordon before Ash could reply to Jill's question

"We have cooked dinner, they are outside and Matron is here as well" replied Ash

By this time Jill had put her things away and made her way into the kitchen she was looking in all the pots and pans

"It smells lovely" said Jill

"Mum, dad if it's alright I've asked Matron to stay" asked Ash

"Of course" replied Gordon

"What's it all about" asked Jill intrigued

"It's to say thank you for all you have done and sorry for everything" said Ash

"Sweetheart" replied Jill giving her a hug

"I do have to ask you something though" said Ash

"Yes" replied Jill a little worried

"I haven't got any drink to go with the meal" said Ash

"I should hope not" replied Jill, jokingly

"No, not for me for you" replied Ash

"I think I've got some in the cupboard" replied Gordon

"Thanks dad" replied Ash

"Right let's go outside with the others" said Gordon

Jill and Gordon went to make their way outside

"Come on" said Jill

"I'm just going to stay here" said Ash

"Are you alright?" asked Gordon

"Just a bit achy, I think I may have pushed it a little hard" replied Ash

"Right, let me take over, tell me what needs to be done" replied Jill

"There's nothing to do for ten minutes" replied Ash looking at her watch

"Well you are not to do anymore let us take it from here" said Gordon

"Sorry" replied Ash disappointed

"Sweetheart" said Jill going over and giving her a hug

"I know" said Ash

"Know what" asked Jill

"This proves, I won't be able to get a job" said Ash

"Well, let's talk about that later" replied Gordon

Ash looked at them both, they must have an idea she thought, they were actually trying to help her, she was shocked and happy at the same time that they actually thought so much about her and were starting to trust her again. What had changed their minds they were dead against the idea this morning.

Jill and Gordon made their way outside and were talking to the others, Ash had stayed inside she went into the dining room to check everything was still alright then came back into the kitchen the back door

"Right if everyone can make their way to the dining room" Ash shouted

Gordon had made his way through to the dining room and then went through to the kitchen

"The table looks lovely" he stated

"Thanks dad" replied Ash

"What can I do?" he asked

"Can you get drinks for everyone" asked Ash

"This looks amazing" said Jill

"I just hope it tastes alright" replied Ash

"It will, right if you take these" replied Jill handing Ash two plates

Ash nodded and took the plates through to the dining room closely followed by Jill and Katie

They all sat talking over dinner when they had all finished Ash went to clear

"Thank you for a lovely meal" said Matron

"Yes thank you, you have all made gone to a lot of effort, the table is lovely, and the beautiful flowers, who thought of them? And you all look wonderful" said Jill

"It was all Ash" said Jonathon

"That's not true, we all did it" said Ash

"No, we just helped make it possible, you did all the hard work" said Katie

"Well, thank you all of you" said Jill

"You didn't have to go so much trouble" added Gordon

"Yes, I did" said Ash starting to pick up plates

"What I mean is I wanted to say thank you for, well for everything" said Ash taking a pile of plates out

"Mum, dad while she's not here, we had a letter delivered by hand from sister" said Tom

But before anything else could be said Ash came back in the room

"Who's for tea or coffee" Ash asked unaware of what was going on

They all said what they wanted and Ash went back out with the rest of the plates

"Where is it" asked Gordon

"Upstairs in my room" replied Katie

"Right well I take it she doesn't know" replied Jill

"No, we thought we would tell you first" replied Jonathon

"Right, well we will sort this out later, I'm just going to give her a hand" said Jill

Not waiting for a response she left the room and went into the kitchen. Ash was pushing herself through the pain. She was stood over the sink nearly in tears when she heard movement behind her

"Sweetheart" said Jill

"I'm fine" said Ash turning around and giving a weak smile

"Thank you" said Jill

"Mum, what's going on" Blurted out Ash

"Nothing" replied Jill

"Really, cause the others have been acting strange since the person at the door" said Ash

"What person, when?" asked Jill

"There was a lady at the door, who asked for me" said Ash

"They haven't said anything" lied Jill, but she could see how this was eating at Ash

"I'll have a word with them" said Jill

"Thanks mum" replied Ash

Ash turned back to the sink "OUCH" she said

"What's wrong? Sit down" said Jill

"I'm fine, I just turned too quickly" said Ash

"Will you do as you are told and sit down" said Jill forcefully

Ash did as she was told and sat down

"Tom, Katie, Jonathon" shouted Jill

They all came in

"Now, I don't care who, one of you is going to make drinks, one is going to wash and one is going to dry" stated Jill

"Yes, mum" they all replied and set to

"Ash, you are going to talk our guest" added Jill

Ash nodded and went through to Gordon and Matron

"What's up" asked Gordon

"Nothing, I just feel like I've failed" said Ash

"Why" asked Matron

"Well, I should be doing that" said Ash pointing to the kitchen

"No, everyone has to help, besides you have done too much already" replied Gordon

Ash knew they were right but it didn't make her feel any better


	57. Chapter 57

Meanwhile in the kitchen

"So what happened this afternoon, I thought you said she didn't know" said Jill

"She doesn't" replied Tom

"Really" asked Jill

"Why" asked Katie spinning around and spraying water everywhere

"Careful" said Jonathon

"Sorry" replied Katie

"So, who was at the door and asked for Ash" asked Jill

"She heard that" asked Tom

"Answer, my question" said Jill starting to get annoyed that no-one seemed to answer questions simply at the moment

"Like we said a young nun asked for Ash, we don't know who, we have never seen her before" said Jonathon

"Thank you" replied Jill

"We told her she wasn't here, we didn't know when she would be back, she said she had to give her this note personally" added Jonathon

"But we said we would take it and give it to her and sister Brigid didn't have to know" added Katie

"Have you looked at this note" asked Jill

"No, do you want me to go and get it" asked Katie

"No, wait until matron has gone home, Ash has worked hard for tonight, let's not let this ruin it for her" stated Jill

"Right, now that's sorted, I'm going to take this through can you follow with the rest please" said Jill

"Yes, mum" the others replied

When they were all sat around the dining table again

"Ash this is for you" said Katie

"From the three of us" added Tom

"For your results" added Jonathon giving her the wrapped gift

"Thanks, guys you shouldn't have" said Ash opening the present

"They're great, thanks" said Ash getting up and giving them each a hug

"What is it" asked Gordon

"A set of artist colouring pencils" replied Ash

Gordon and Jill looked at each other

"Mum what is it" asked Katie

"Nothing" replied Jill

"Your mum and I were going to get those but we thought of this instead" said Gordon giving Ash another present

"Mum, dad" said Ash starting to well up

"You haven't opened it yet" said Jill

"I don't deserve it" replied Ash trying to give it back

"Of course you do you worked very hard" said Gordon

"Well if you don't want it, I'll have it" said Katie

Ash opened the present

"I can't accept these" said Ash trying to give it back

"What, I thought you were serious about becoming a doctor" said Gordon

"I am" replied Ash

"Well then, you can take these" said Jill

"But, they are yours" replied Ash

"Yes, they were we used them all the time when we were studying" said Gordon

"What that's not fair" said Jonathon

"Yeah, maybe we should share them" added Ash

"There is no need to share, Jonathon already has these books, and we discussed this already" said Gordon

"But they are yours maybe Jonathon should have them, after all" said Ash

"After all what" asked Jill

"Nothing" replied Ash

No-one pushed the subject any further they sat in silence, Ash was looking through the books she could see where Jill had made notes in the borders on some of the pages. After a few minutes Matron broke the silence

"Ash what did you think of that book we were talking about the other day" asked Matron

"Ohh, it was really good, I've just got to the last chapter" replied Ash

"But then I put it down somewhere and I can't remember where" added Ash realising what Matron was getting at

"Where did you have it last" asked Matron

"I can't remember, I was very tired, but I've searched my room" replied Ash

"Where else have you looked" asked Katie joining in

"In here, the front room and the kitchen" reeled off Ash

"Was that the one you were reading the other day in the study" asked Jill

"Yeah" replied Ash

"Maybe it's still in there, I'll just go and check" said Ash getting up

"Wait there I'll come with you" replied Jill

When they reached the study Jill started the conversation

"What did you mean back there?" asked Jill

"We haven't treated any of you differently have we" added Jill

"No, mum you haven't, but I can see it from Jonathon's point of view" replied Ash

"Which is what? Is this it" asked Jill picking up the book

"Yes, thanks mum, well that something as precious as that should go to me, ohh how can I say it" said Ash

"You can't say it, because there is nothing to say" said Gordon from the doorway

Ash went to say something but it was now that Jill looked at Ash and saw the picture behind her

"Ohh, my it's wonderful, Gordon look" said Jill making her way over to get a closer look

"Baby girl, come here" said Jill

"Do, you like it?" Ash asked

"Baby girl, it's amazing, oh Gordon do you remember that?" said Jill pointing to one of the drawings

"Yes, it really is, well words can't really do it justice" said Gordon hugging them both

"You found it then" said Katie

"You knew" asked Jill

"Only today, but it brilliant" replied Tom

"Matron helped me plan tonight" said Ash

"We should have known Matron was something to do with it" replied Jill

"It's really good" said Matron

"I hope you don't mind but I made this for you" said Ash breaking away from Jill and bending down by the side of the desk and giving the frame to Matron

"Thank you" said Matron

"Let's have a look" said Jonathon

"You, knew about this" asked Matron

"No-one knew, Katie and I did it this afternoon" replied Ash

"It's wonderful" said Matron

"Wow, that's of the day in the forest" said Jill

"Are you sure you don't want to keep it" asked Matron

"No, it's for you" replied Ash

Everyone made their way into the front room apart from Jill and Ash


	58. Chapter 58

"It's beautiful" said Jill

"I keep looking at it and seeing different parts, I can't take my eyes off of it" added Jill

"I'm glad you like it" said Ash

"Like it, I love it" said Jill giving Ash another hug

"Now, no more silly talk about the books" said Jill

"Okay, mum I do love them" said Ash

"Good" replied Jill

"Mum, I am really sorry" said Ash

"Baby girl, there is nothing to be sorry for" said Jill

"There are lots and I can never say sorry enough, it will never be enough for what I've done" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, look at me, we know how sorry you are and you will never do anything like that again, so let's draw a line under it and move on" replied Jill

"I don't know if I can" replied Ash

"Yes you can, because we are all going to do it together" replied Jill

"Yes that's right" added Gordon making them both jump

"Sorry, I just wanted to make sure everything was alright and to get another look at this" added Gordon

"I could stare at it for hours" said Jill

"Sorry to break this up, but I must get going" said Matron

"I'll take you home" said Jill

"Thank you for a lovely dinner and for this" said Matron clutching the picture frame

"Thank you for everything" replied Ash

"Mum, can I come along for the ride" asked Ash

"Yes of course" replied Jill

"Right, ready let's go" added Jill handing Ash her coat

"Ready" replied Ash

"Thank you again Gordon, it was a lovely night" said Matron

"Nothing to do with me" replied Gordon

"Bye" said Katie, Tom and Jonathon

"Bye, see you soon" replied Matron

They all got into the car

"Thank you Jill" said Matron as they pulled out of the drive way

"No trouble" replied Jill

"So are there any other plans you two have cooked up that I need to worry about" asked Jill

"That would be telling" replied Matron turning around and winking at Ash

"Yeah mum, you wouldn't want to ruin a surprise" said Ash

"That's all part of the fun" added Matron

"How did I know that would come back to bite me" said Jill with a giggle

"No, really is there anything else" asked Jill seriously

"You will have to wait and see" replied Ash

Jill knew that Ash wouldn't give anything away while Matron was still in the car so changed the subject

"So what have you got planned for tomorrow?" asked Jill

Matron was first to reply

"Nothing of importance, I was going to pop in at some point for this month's figures, what about you Ash?" said Matron

"Nothing, that I can think of, unless either of you need anything done" replied Ash

"Well that's very kind of you, I think I might have a few jobs you can do" replied Jill

"Really" replied Ash excitedly, for the first time in a long time she felt useful

"Well I can see I'm going to have to keep you busy from now on" said Jill

"Well if I had known that this was what it took, I would have done this weeks ago" replied Ash jokingly

Just then they arrived at Matrons

"Thank you for the lift, would you like to come in" asked Matron

"You're welcome, No we had better be going" replied Jill

"Bye Matron and thank you for everything" said Ash from the back seat

"Bye Ash and thank you for a lovely meal and this fantastic present" replied Matron

"And thank you, Jill for a fabulous night" added Matron

"Night Matron and thank you, see you tomorrow" replied Jill

They sat there and watched Matron safely in

"Come on then are you getting in the front" said Jill patting the seat next to her

Ash moved to the front seat, Jill just sat there looking at her

"What?" said Ash shyly

"Nothing" replied Jill

"Have I got something on my face?" asked Ash bending to look in the mirror

"No, I was just looking at how grown up my beautiful baby girl is" replied Jill

"What do you want?" asked Ash

"Nothing" replied Jill pretending to be hurt by her comments and hitting her playfully

"Ouch" said Ash playing along

"So have you and Matron got anymore plans?" asked Jill

"So there was something then" replied Ash

"Is there?" asked Jill

"What's up don't you like surprises?" asked Ash she only had to look at Jill to tell she didn't

"You don't do you, if I tell you, you have to tell me next time I ask" added Ash turning the situation around to help herself because she too didn't like surprises

"Okay, promise" said Jill seeing no way out of it

"Shake on it" said Ash, they shook hands

"No, more plans" said Ash

"Truthfully, look me in the eyes and say it" said Jill

Ash looked Jill in the eyes

"No, more plans" said Ash

"Thank goodness" replied Jill driving off

"Is there anything bothering you?" asked Jill

Ash thought about it for a minute as she stared out the window at the passing houses

"You can tell me anything" said Jill trying to coax it out of her

"I'm worried that I'm still hurting you and dad" said Ash truthfully

"What makes you say that?" asked Jill pulling the car over and looking at Ash

"Well everything I do seems to be wrong at the moment, maybe Sister was right, maybe I need to go away and learn how to be a better person" said Ash

"No, listen to me, there is nothing wrong, yes we find it difficult to understand what you are going through sometimes, but it's a lesson for us all" replied Jill

"Ash look at me, we all do things that hurt other people, or do things that they would not have done in that way. We are all learning all the time that is life. I bet if you talk to any of your grandparents they can tell you hundreds of stories about me or your dad or sister doing the wrong thing and causing pain to the ones we love. I know your brothers and sister have done plenty in the past and they hurt your dad the other day when they didn't show up for the meal" added Jill

"Sorry" replied Ash not knowing what to say she was still trying to take it all in

"Sweetheart, its life it's how you learn from it, that makes you a stronger, better person" replied Jill

"You promise to tell me if I'm hurting you" said Ash

"Yes I promise, but you have to promise me the same if anything is bothering you" replied Jill

"Promise" said Ash

When Jill was happy she moved on they were nearly home when

"I'm scared, I'll have the nightmares again" blurted out Ash

"There is nothing to be scared of" replied Jill

"I know, but they are becoming more real and often" replied Ash

"That's probably because of all that has been going on recently, they should stop now everything is sorted and you know where we are" replied Jill

"I know, but I'm scared to close my eyes" replied Ash

"Why, what is it you are seeing" asked Jill pulling on to the drive

"Well it's like a string of dreams, memories ohh I don't know what to call them" said Ash

"Okay, go on" replied Jill trying to encourage her

Ash started to explained about her dreams while Jill just sat there listening trying to take it all in they all seemed to involve sister trying to take her and both Jill and Gordon either not able to hear her or nowhere to be seen. Telling Jill all about her dreams were bringing the images flooding back. Ash started to cry

"Ohh baby girl it's alright" said Jill wiping away the tears

"That's not all of it" said Ash

"It's alright you don't have to say anymore if you don't want to" replied Jill

"I want to this is the last one" replied Ash

"I wake up in a room it's dark, I try the door it opens, so I walk down the corridor trying the doors as I go some open some don't but they are all empty, then I come to the last door and it opens and sister is inside, I ask for both of you but she acts like she has never heard of any of you, she passes me some clothes and tells me to get dressed it's time to be more like her and that's when I wake up" said Ash

"Baby girl, why didn't you tell us earlier" asked Jill giving her a hug

"I was going to the other night but you got called out" replied Ash

"Then when you came back you both seemed so tired" Ash added

"You can tell us anything at anytime no matter what, when" started Jill

"I've had the dream in full the night before I was going to tell you all the other times it's been one or two parts together before I've woken up" butted in Ash

"Right well you must come and get us when it starts" stated Jill

Gordon who was in the study when they arrived thought they had been a long time so went out to check on everyone

"Sweetheart what is, it" asked Gordon seeing Ash had been crying

"I'm sorry" said Ash

"Come here" said Jill who was out of the car and by Gordon

Ash got out of the car and gave them both a big hug they all made their way indoors

"Right let's get you in bed young lady, you've got a busy day tomorrow" said Gordon

"What?" asked Ash

"I haven't said anything yet" whispered Jill to Gordon

"Well that list I'm making for you, you're not getting off that easily" said Jill to Ash

"Night mum, dad, love you" replied Ash giving them both a kiss

"Night sweetheart" replied Gordon

"Night, sweet dreams" added Jill


	59. Chapter 59

They watched her go upstairs then Jill went through to the study and stood staring at the picture, she started to cry. Gordon came in and was about to say something when he saw Jill was upset

"Jill, sweetheart, what is it?" Gordon asked

Jill told him everything, well nearly everything that had happened on the drive home, once Gordon had thought about what Jill had told him about how Ash was feeling about hurting people and all about her dreams

"What do you want to do" asked Gordon

"I want to hold her close and never let her go" replied Jill

"But I know that will not help the situation" she added

They moved into the kitchen and Jill made them a drink

"What do you think?" asked Jill

"I think she needs to talk to sister and get her feelings off of her chest" replied Gordon taking his drink from Jill

"The only problem with that is sister, she just won't listen" replied Jill sitting down

"That's true" replied Gordon

They sat in silence for a few minutes

"What if she was to write a letter as well" said Jill

"It could work" replied Gordon

They finished their drinks in silence

"Come on we will worry about this in the morning, let's go to bed" said Gordon getting up and putting the cups in the sink

They both made their way upstairs

"I'll just check in on her" said Jill as they reached Ash's room

They quietly opened the door

"Mum, where's mum" mumbled Ash

"Mum" said Ash with a start waking herself up

"It's alright sweetheart, I'm here" said Jill

"Did you have a bad dream?" asked Gordon

Ash nodded

"Right well I'll be back in a minute I just need to speak to your dad" said Jill

Jill and Gordon went through to their room

"I feel so helpless" said Jill clearly upset

"I know, so do I" replied Gordon

"I'll go and stay with her tonight" replied Jill

"No you two stay in here, I'll sleep in Ash's room for tonight" replied Gordon

Once they were ready for bed they both went back to Ash's room

Ash was awake and reading a book

"You should be asleep" said Gordon

"Just a little longer" replied Ash

"No, it's time for bed" replied Gordon

"Please" pleaded Ash

"What's wrong" said Jill sitting on the bed

"I'm scared" whispered Ash

"Right well you are going to sleep in our room with mum tonight" stated Gordon

"No, dad it's fine I can beat this, I just need a little more time" replied Ash

"We've talk about this and one night won't hurt" replied Jill

"I'm not taking no for an answer" added Gordon

"You've been told" said Jill jokingly getting up

"Come on then off you go, some of us want to get to bed" said Gordon

"I could always sleep on the floor, that way you can both be in your own bed" reasoned Ash feeling guilty

"No, now do as you are told" said Gordon

"Night dad" said Ash knowing she had lost the fight

"Night sweetheart" replied Gordon giving them both a kiss goodnight

"Sweet dreams" he added as he shut the door behind them

Jill made her way to her room and looked around for Ash who was still stood by her room

"Come on" said Jill

"I can't" replied Ash

"Why not?" asked Jill

"I don't know, I feel scared and guilty, I suppose" stated Ash

"I know, trust me" replied Jill

Ash knew she could trust her and moved towards her it was now that Jill saw she was crying

"It's alright baby girl" Jill said giving Ash a hug and moving them both into the room and onto the bed

Ash was sobbing her heart out Jill could only make out a few words every now and again

"It's alright I'm here, nothings go to happen" said Jill trying to sooth Ash

Nearly an hour later and Ash had finally stopped crying and had dozed off. Gordon had gotten up to get a drink and was making his way back when he noticed the bedroom light was still on he quietly went to the door and opened it

"Everything alright" he whispered

Jill nodded

"I've just got her off, can you give me a hand" Jill whispered back

Between them they got Ash under the covers, Gordon stayed with her while Jill changed her top for a dry one. The rest of the night went by quietly they only woke when the alarm clock went off

"Morning" said Ash

"Morning" replied Jill before she could say anything else

"Knock, knock" said Gordon opening the door

"Come in" said Jill

"Everyone, alright?" asked Gordon

Ash nodded

"How did you sleep?" asked Jill

"Very well, how about you two?" replied Gordon

"I'm so sorry for last night" said Ash

"That's what we're here for" replied Jill

"Right we had better get a move on or we'll be late" said Gordon

Ash left Jill and Gordon to get ready she walked into her room and sat on the end of her bed, why was this happening to her, what had she done and why now.

Gordon was first to get ready

"I'll go and make a start on breakfast" Gordon said going out the room, as he passed Ash's room he noticed the door was open so glanced in and saw her staring into space

"Sweetheart, are you coming for breakfast" he asked making her jump

"Yeah I'll be down in a minute" replied Ash

"Well you'd better hurry, you don't want to be late" replied Gordon he then carried on down the stairs

Ash was thinking what a strange thing to say, why would she be late it wasn't like she had to be anywhere this morning, was it. She got up and checked her calendar in case she had forgotten something important. No there was nothing until next week, maybe she had miss heard him. She quickly got dressed and made her way down she could hear Jill and Gordon talking in the kitchen

"Here she is" said Gordon

"Right sit down and have this" said Jill sliding a plate of toast across and pouring her a cup of tea

"Thanks" said Ash sitting down and starting to eat

"What have you got planned for today" asked Gordon with a grin on his face

"Nothing, ohh mum was going to give me something's to do" replied Ash

"Well, we will have to forget that" replied Jill

"Why? I feel fine, I was really looking forward to it" said Ash upset

"Because you are working with us today" replied Gordon

Ash sat there shocked, she couldn't take it in

"What" she finally managed to stutter out

"Yes, you are going to work with us, we've got some filing and other things that need to be done" replied Jill

Ash couldn't believe her luck, they had found her a job and the best part was she would be working with them

"Thank-you" Ash beamed her smile then faded until now she had forgotten about sister, Jill and Gordon could see something worry her

"It's alright, sister won't be there" said Gordon

"How long will I be there for" asked Ash

"Well we will see how you feel at lunchtime" replied Jill

"I've got a job" said Ash excited she got up and gave both of them a kiss then went to leave to get ready

"We leave in ten minutes" said Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash running up the stairs

"We are doing the right thing?" asked Jill getting up and starting on the dishes

"She will be with us at all times, we can control things better" reassured Gordon

"You're right" replied Jill turning and giving him a peck on the cheek

They spent the rest of the time in silence when Jill had finished the washing up she went upstairs leaving Gordon to finish the drying up he then made his way upstairs

Ash was the first one down she went into the front room and picked up her book, when she turned around Jill was in the doorway

"Ready?" asked Jill

Ash nodded

"Right well there are a few ground rules" started Jill

"One, if you are in pain you stop what you are doing straight away and find us" stated Jill. Ash nodded Gordon had now joined them

"Two, you are like any employee, you have your breaks when you are told not when you like" added Gordon

"No using the phone for personal calls, only do what you are told, when you are told" carried on Gordon

"If you are worried about anything you ask straight away, understood" said Jill

"Yes" replied Ash

"Finally you are not allowed to talk to anyone about any information about patients you might see or hear" said Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash, she knew all of this anyway, well they all did the amount of times they had been at the hospital over the years

"Right let's get going" said Gordon going towards the door

"Ash you're coming with me" said Jill

"Okay" replied Ash following Jill

"I will see you there a bit later" replied Gordon, it was his morning that he did a few house calls first thing


	60. Chapter 60

Jill and Ash made their way into the royal

"Morning doctor, Ash" said Lizzie

"Morning" they both replied

"Right Lizzie, Ash is here to help with the filing" stated Jill

"Ohhh, great!" replied Lizzie

"I'll leave you both too it" replied Jill going through to her office to get ready for morning surgery

"What do you need me to do" asked Ash eager to start

"We are going to have so much fun" said Lizzie not really paying attention

Ash had hung her coat and bag on the back of the door and was going towards the pile of folders on the table and sat waiting patiently until Lizzie had finished on the phone.

Lizzie had just finished explaining everything that Ash had to do when the phone rang again, Lizzie was still busy on the phone when Jill poked her head around checking in on Ash before her first patient

"How's it going?" asked Jill

"Fine" replied Ash

"Well, you remember what we said" said Jill

"Yes, mum" replied Ash

The time had flown by Gordon had arrived at some point and it was now morning coffee break all the doctors had come into the little reception area, while Lizzie made them a drink

"How's it going?" Gordon asked Lizzie

"Really well, she's already done half of what I wanted to do by the end of the day" replied Lizzie

"How are you feeling" Jill asked Ash

"I'm alright, I might just go for a wonder while you are all in here" replied Ash

Jill looked at Ash to see if she could see any signs of pain

"Really, I'm fine I just need to stretch, do you want to come with me" asked Ash

Jill nodded and picked up her drink she went outside into the sunshine

"So how's it going?" asked Jill

"Its fine" replied Ash walking up and down she then lent against the wall next to Jill they stood there in silence watching the people go past

"Right, well better get back to it" said Jill

Ash followed her in and took the cups from the doctors, without being asked she went and washed and dried them up before bringing them back. Lizzie was busy at reception when she came back so she carried on where she had left off. Ash had just finished the last one when Gordon came out with a patient, he was asking Lizzie lots of questions, Ash sat there patiently waiting for them to finish

"Doctor, could you came and have a look at a patient" asked a nurse

Gordon went off towards the wards

"Lizzie, what can I do now?" asked Ash

"Right, give me a second and I'll put these away and get the next lot" said Lizzie

Before she could an emergency came through the doors

"Can I help you" asked Lizzie

"Yes, we need to see the doctor" replied the lady

"Have you got an appointment" asked Lizzie

"No, my son has fallen and hurt himself" replied the lady

Ash had heard everything and had got a wheelchair from the corridor and found a clean dressing

"Can you sit in here please" asked Ash to the young lad, once he was seated Ash applied pressure to his cut on his forehead and wheeled him towards casualty

Lizzie had put the doctor's lights up

Jill came down the corridor to find Ash pushing the wheelchair round the corner to casualty

"Ash" said Jill going towards them

"Doctor, this is David he has fallen and cut his head" replied Ash trying to sound professional

"Right, thank you" replied Jill

"And this is his mum" added Ash giving Jill the paperwork as well

Ash left them to it and went back to reception

"Thanks Ash, how did you know what to do" asked Lizzie

"I don't know, I suppose I've just seen them do it so often" replied Ash

"Right well here's the next lot" replied Lizzie putting the folders down

She didn't see anyone until it was lunchtime. Lizzie was busy telling anyone and everyone what Ash had done when the young lad had come in

"Ash, are you ready" asked Gordon

"Yes, dad" replied Ash

"Doctor, did you hear what Ash did" asked Lizzie

"No" replied Gordon, that was a mistake they were there for a further five minutes while Lizzie recalled the whole story

"Well, done" said Gordon when Lizzie had finished

"Right well we will be at home if you need us" said Jill who had just arrived

"I thought you two would have been home by now" said Jill as she followed Gordon outside

"Well, Lizzie was telling me all about this one" replied Gordon

"Yes, you did very well, but you shouldn't be pushing people around" said Jill

"Sorry, it won't happen again" replied Ash

"Yes, you shouldn't be doing that" said Gordon, Lizzie had clearly left that bit out

They spent the drive home in silence, Ash was first through the door

"Ash where have you been, mum and dad will be back soon" said Katie

"She has been with us, helping Lizzie" replied Jill following Ash through the door

Jill went through to the kitchen followed by the others

"What can I do" asked Ash

"You can wait outside with the others" replied Jill

"Mum, I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you" replied Ash as she went to make her way outside

"You haven't I just don't want you pushing yourself too soon" replied Jill

Once Ash was outside with the boys

"Katie can you go and get that note please" said Gordon

He then helped Jill get lunch ready

"What's wrong" he asked

"I don't know, I suppose I saw her pushing the wheelchair along and thought maybe it's too soon, maybe she would be better off still at home, she's pushing herself too hard to try and please everyone, but what if it is making it worse" replied Jill

"The only way we will know is if we let her try it for herself, she is big enough to tell us if anthing is wrong, I mean look at last night" replied Gordon

"True" replied Jill

Just then Katie came down and handed Jill the note then they all made their way outside. They had sat and had lunch mostly talking to the others about their day. When they had finished Gordon went inside and had taken Katie, Tom and Jonathon in with him

"Ash about yesterday, you were right, sister had this delivered for you" said Jill handing over the note

"Thanks" replied Ash getting up and putting it in her pocket

"Aren't you going to read it" asked Jill slightly puzzled

"Later, right now I've got work to do" replied Ash

"Are you sure you're up to it" asked Jill

Ash nodded she was rather enjoying working with Lizzie and it was making the day go faster

"Right are you two ready" shouted Gordon from the back door

"Come on mum" said Ash

"If you're sure" replied Jill getting up

"Yes, don't worry I will come and find you if it gets too much" replied Ash

They said goodbye to the others and made their way to the royal in silence, Ash kept on putting her hand to her pocket as if it was causing her pain, when they got out of the car Jill asked Gordon to talk to Ash

"Are you alright" Gordon asked Ash

Ash nodded "Actually, can you look after this" asked Ash handing the note over

They made their way in where Matron was being told the story of Ash taking care of the patient

"Hello" said Jill, Gordon and Ash

"Hello" replied Matron

"Lizzie's been telling me all about how well you've done" said Matron

Ash left them talking and went back to the paperwork she had nearly finished before lunch


	61. Chapter 61

Half an hour later and Ash had finished that pile of paperwork and was waiting for Lizzie who was busy with the phone, some patients and then to top it all off Matron who wanted some paperwork

"Can I do anything to help" asked Ash

"Yes, you can take these and a tea tray to matron" replied Lizzie turning and taking a couple of folders out of the filing cabinet

Ash took the papers and made a tea tray. Then went off in search of Matron she didn't have to go far Matron was stood talking to Jill

"Sorry, where would you like these" asked Ash

"I'm in the hospital secretary's office" replied Matron

Ash went on and placed the items on the desk she was making her way back when she felt a twinge of pain. She decided she would tell one of her parents they would only be cross otherwise. As she came around the corner she breathed a sigh of relief Gordon had just finished with a patient

"Dad" said Ash

"Yes" replied Gordon

"I'm starting to get that pain, but I want to carry on" said Ash

"Okay, but if it gets worse" replied Gordon

"Thanks dad" replied Ash

"Have you told mum" asked Gordon walking with her towards reception

"No not yet" replied Ash

"Have you taken anything" asked Gordon

"I'm just about to" replied Ash fumbling around in her bag

Gordon stayed and made sure she had taken something and she was alright when he was satisfied he called his next patient through

"Ash are you alright, you look rather pale" said Lizzie

"I'm fine, what can I do now" asked Ash

"Can you give me a couple of minutes" asked Lizzie, Ash nodded

Before Lizzie could find Ash something to do Jill came along having finished with her last patient

"Ash, dad's just told me, are you feeling any better" asked Jill while handing Lizzie the paperwork

"No, not really" replied Ash truthfully rubbing her side

"Right my office now" said Jill

Once they were in Jill's office

"Right let's have a look at you" said Jill

"Mum, stop fussing, I'll be fine in a minute" said Ash

"Just do it" replied Jill now next to the bed, Ash just stood there and folded her arms

"Just to put my mind at rest" added Jill

Ash gingerly got on the bed and let Jill examine her

"So" asked Ash

"It seems fine, but I'm taking you home" replied Jill

"Okay" replied Ash

"I've just got to do a ward round and talk to dad" replied Jill, she knew she must be in pain if she was not trying to stay

"Wait here I'll be back in ten" added Jill

Ash sat down, while Jill went across the corridor to speak to Gordon, she then went on her ward round. While Gordon went to reception to tell Lizzie what was happening and he had to calm her down and explain she had done nothing wrong and there was nothing she could have done differently. He took Ash's coat and bag and went to check on her

"Sweetheart, I hear mum is taking you home" he said as he walked through the door

Ash was sat at the desk resting her head in her hands sobbing

"Sorry" replied Ash

"Don't be silly" said Gordon moving over and gently rubbing her back

A couple of minutes and Jill re-entered the office

"Right let's get you home" said Jill looking worryingly at Gordon

Gordon followed them to Jill's car and watched them leave

Little did they know they would be back very soon


	62. Chapter 62

"Right I just have to pop in and see a patient, it won't take long" said Jill turning out of the royal

"Okay" replied Ash

Jill pulled up outside

"Right I won't be long" said Jill getting out and taking her bag out of the boot she then made her way in

Ash was sat in the car she pulled her knees up trying to get comfy she then pulled her book out of her bag it was the first time all day she had had time to read. She was just about to start reading when something caught her eye from the building site across the road.

There was a load bang followed by a large cloud of dust. Ash got out of the car there were a few builders wandering dazed on to the pavement. Ash went towards the door where Jill was coming out to see what had happened

"Mum, something happened over there" said Ash pointing to the building site

"Right, go inside and ask if you can use the phone to call for help" said Jill

"Yes, mum" replied Ash

Jill went to the boot of her car and got the emergency care kit out and went towards the group of builders that had gathered on the pavement. Meanwhile Ash was inside on the phone explaining what was going on.

Ash then put the phone down and thanked the lady she then went outside to wait for the emergency services and to see if there was anything she could help Jill with. Ash crossed the road and couldn't see her mum anywhere

"Have you seen the doctor" Ash asked a group that had gathered

"She went in there with the boss to help" said one of the men

"Which way did they go" asked Ash

"You can't go in it's not safe" replied the man

Ash didn't listen she saw someone walking towards her so she went in that direction

"Where's the doctor" she asked

The man who she guessed was the boss was helping another man get to safety pointed in the general direction

"Thank you" replied Ash carrying on

Just as she reached the doorway there was another bang she shielded her eyes and some rubble fell towards the ground. Ash waited until the dust had settled

"Mum" she shouted

She waited for what seemed like forever but was only thirty seconds for a reply but there was none

"Mum" she shouted again this time she didn't wait she went on in

She went in it took a few seconds for her eyes to adjust to the darkness she stood still and held her breath to listen for the slightest sound to know where they were

"Mum" she said again this time she heard a faint cough it sounded like it was coming from upstairs

Ash cautiously went upstairs scared of what she might find there was a noise from the far room she went towards it without thinking of her own safety

"Mum" said Ash as she entered the room she could see both Jill and the patient had been knocked unconscious from some falling debris.

Ash quickly checked the patient over who was starting to come around she finished wrapping a bandage around his arm that Jill had started she then turned her attention to Jill

"Mum" said Ash

She could see Jill had a cut to the head so she looked for Jill's bag which she found then finally found a bandage which she wrapped around Jill's head. She then found a neck collar which she placed carefully around Jill's neck

"Mum, please wake up" whispered Ash as she tried to move some of the debris

"Hello, Doc" shouted the ambulance crew

"We're up here" Ash shouted back relieved

"What happened here" He asked, Ash had never met this paramedic before but she later found out he was called Dan

"I don't know, I found them both unconscious" replied Ash

"Right, let's get them out then" replied Dan

"Be careful, he may have internal bleeding" started Ash

Ash then reeled off what she thought was wrong with both patients just as she was finishing the other ambulance crew rocked up, she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw them

"Alright Ash, Dan" Rob said

Ash nodded she didn't have time to respond

"You know them" asked Dan

"Yeah, that's doc Ormerod's youngest" replied Rob

"Look after mum, please" pleaded Ash

"Right you take this guy, we'll take the doc" said Rob

They saw the other crew take the patient down which gave them a little more room to move Jill

"Right on my count one, two, three" said Rob

"Go on I'll just get the bags" said Ash turning to get the bags

Rob didn't think anything of it, it was what the doctors normally did anyway they made their way out and down the stairs when there was another crash. They made their way quickly outside

"Ash" shouted Rob

There was no reply. A beam had come down where they all had been just seconds ago luckily it had missed Ash but it was blocking her way out.

There was a loud creaking noise as the whole floor gave way, Ash fell through and it all went dark

"Ash" shouted Rob

Again there was no reply

"Right, let's get back quick and get doc Ormerod" said Rob


	63. Chapter 63

It didn't take them long to get to the hospital in that time Jill was starting to come around, they pulled up and Gordon met the ambulance outside

"Doc" said Rob starting to open the doors

"Yes" replied Gordon

"Jill has a concussion but it's Ash" started Rob

"What about Ash" Jill asked

"She went in after you, when you didn't answer, good job really you were both in a bad way" started Rob as they made their way in to casualty

"Where is she" asked Jill trying to get up

"Stay there let's get you checked over, I'll look after Ash and I'll keep you informed" replied Gordon putting a hand on her shoulder

Matron had now come along to casualty having heard what had happened

"How is she" asked Matron

"It looks like a few cuts and bruises and a concussion" replied Gordon

"Sorry, doctor can I have a word please" said Rob

"Yes" replied Gordon walking across the room but keeping one eye on Jill

"Ash is trapped" said Rob

"How, why" said Gordon shocked he leaned against the wall for support

"What is it" asked Jill seeing the look of horror on Gordon's face

"Nothing" replied Gordon

"Don't lie to me Gordon Ormerod" said Jill

"Matron, can I talk to you for a second" said Gordon

They went out into the corridor

"Ash is trapped can you phone sister and let her know please and stay with Jill I've got to go there" said Gordon

"Yes of course" replied Matron

Gordon went back into Jill

"I'll be back in a minute I'm just going to get Ash" said Gordon

"Gordon what's going on please tell me" pleaded Jill

"Rob" added Jill when Gordon didn't say anything

"Okay, we think Ash is trapped there was another crash when we were getting you out" replied Rob

"Thanks Rob" replied Jill getting up and trying to take the drip out

"No it's best for everyone if you stay here, I will bring her back" said Gordon

"Jill, Gordon" said Matron

"Yes" replied Jill

"I've tried to call sister, but she's not at the convent they say she left with a bag, do you have any idea where she has gone" asked Matron

"No she hasn't said anything to us" replied Gordon

"What about the note" Jill asked

Gordon put his hand in his pocket and pulled out the note he opened it and read it

"It says she is going away for a couple of weeks if Ash wants to join her to meet her at the train station today in about half an hour" said Gordon checking his watch

"Doc we've got to get going" said Rob

"It's alright we will get hold of sister" replied Matron

Gordon grabbed his bags gave Jill a kiss and went running out the door

Gordon arrived at the building site there were a group of builders doing their best to remove some of the rubble

"Ash" shouted Gordon

There was no answer

"Ash" shouted Gordon again helping to move some bricks

"Rob, help me with this" shouted Gordon

"Okay, one, two, three lift" said Rob

They had been there for nearly half an hour shouting her name and not getting a response

"Doctor" said Sister running over

"Where is she" said Sister not waiting for a response

"We don't know, we haven't heard anything from her" replied Rob

"Aisling" shouted Sister

"Ohh you stupid, stupid girl what were you playing at" muttered Sister

"Actually she was helping" said Rob

"And what do you know about it" shouted Sister

Rob went to say something but Gordon pulled him aside

"Best not, help lift this" said Gordon

"Aisling" shouted sister

It was now starting to get dark

"I'll see if we can get some lights" said the fire officer

"Doctor, we can't stop" said Sister her voice was sounding hoarse from all the shouting

"We won't, can you go back to the royal and get Tom and Jonathon" replied Gordon

Sister was reluctant to go

"We need more hands if we are going to find her" stated Gordon

"Rob, take sister to get the boys and anyone else who is not on duty" said Gordon

"Let's go" said Rob

Once they had left Gordon got back to work he had to keep hope although the longer it was going on the less hope he had of finding her

"Ash" he shouted

Ash was starting to come around her head was pounding she could hear what sounded like her dad calling her name but it sounded so muffled and far away. She panicked slightly was she having another dream she tried to move but found she couldn't something or someone was pinning her down.

She tried to call out but her mouth was so dry and it was really dusty that she just coughed that brought a pain in her chest

Her eyes became adjusted to the dark and her memory was starting to come back to her, mum she suddenly thought. No that's right mum got out or did she, I was getting the bags she moved her fingers and felt the familiar material of the bags she then remembered she fell through the floor.

She coughed again and winced at the pain she thought she had bruised or maybe broken some ribs she then mentally went through her body her left arm really hurt that maybe broken, her head hurt and she had passed out but didn't know for how long, something was pinning her to the ground and her tummy really hurt she tried to wriggle her toes but nothing happened. She sobbed but quickly stopped when that hurt even more than coughing she was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard her name being called again

"Ash" shouted Gordon

"Dad" she said it was quiet but at least her voice was coming back

"Stop" she heard someone say

"I think I heard something" the fire officer said

"Ash" shouted Gordon

"Dad" replied Ash a little louder

Gordon's heart was in his chest she was still alive

"It's alright we're coming" said Gordon

"Keep talking to us" he added

"It came from over here" said the fire officer

Just then Tom and Jonathon came running over

"Dad" said Tom

"We've just heard her" said Gordon relieved

"Ash" shouted Jonathon

"Mum" shouted Ash

"She's fine, she's awake and can't wait to see you" shouted Tom

"Dad, Jon, help me move this" said Tom

Ash started to drift off to sleep again


	64. Chapter 64

"Ash" shouted Tom

"Ash, stay awake" shouted Gordon

"Dad" said Ash she was feeling so tired everything hurt she just wanted to close her eyes

"Dad, look" said Jonathon

"What?" said Gordon

Jonathon pointed underneath a brick they could see the top of one of the bags

"Ash, not long now we can see you" shouted Gordon

"Aisling" said Sister who up until this point had stayed rather quiet for her

"Aisling, stay with us" added Sister

They moved the top bit of rubble and could see Ash she was being pinned across the chest and abdomen by a beam

"Ash" said Gordon bending down and stroking her face

"Dad, I'm so tired" said Ash

"I know just stay awake a little longer" replied Gordon

"Tom, get my bag" said Gordon

Tom ran off and came back with the bags

"Dad" he said passing them over

"Right, Ash, I'm going to give you something for the pain, then I'm going to check you over" said Gordon

"Dad I can't move my legs" said Ash

The boy's looked worryingly at Gordon

"It's alright, it's probably the shock" said Gordon reassuringly

Gordon gave her the pain relief and Ash kept trying to drift off to sleep

"Tom, come and talk to Ash" said Gordon

"What about" asked Tom

"Anything, just try to keep her awake" replied Gordon

"Right we need to remove this beam" said Gordon to the fire officer

"We're just getting the jacks in place" replied the fire officer

"How, long" asked Gordon already aware of how long Ash had been trapped here

"Aisling stay awake" said sister

"Sister can you help over here please" said Gordon trying to keep her out of the way

"You know you didn't have to go to all this trouble to get their attention" said Tom jokingly

"I know but I wanted to" retorted Ash

"Ash don't go to sleep, please" said Tom

"Dad will kill me" added Tom

"Sorry" replied Ash

"What for" replied Tom

"Getting you in trouble" replied Ash

"Well you haven't yet" replied Tom

"So how was work" asked Tom

"I got into trouble" replied Ash

"How" asked Tom

"I helped someone I shouldn't, mum's angry" replied Ash with a cough

"Is that why you were coming home" asked Tom

"No, I was in pain" replied Ash

"Does it still hurt now" asked Tom

"Yes, no, I don't know, where's mum" sobbed Ash

"Hey don't cry" said Tom

"Mum's not cross, she just worries and she's waiting for you" added Tom

"Is she really awake" asked Ash

"Yes, Matron and Katie are with her and they are waiting for you" replied Tom

Ash was starting to get tired and confused

"Where's mum" asked Ash

"Dad" said Tom

"Yes" replied Gordon coming over

Tom stood up

"She keeps asking for mum" said Tom

"Okay, I'll stay here it won't be long now" replied Gordon

"Hello, sweetheart" said Gordon bending down

"Where's mum" asked Ash

"Not long now and then you will see her" replied Gordon

"We're ready to lift now" said the fire officer to Gordon

Gordon nodded

"Ash" said Gordon tapping her face to wake her up

"Ash, you're going to feel a bit of pain" said Gordon he then nodded to the officer

"On my count one, two, three lift" said the fire officer

"Stop" he said again once there was enough room to get Ash out

"Right, stretcher over here now" said Gordon

"Carefully, move her across now" said Gordon

They moved Ash across to the stretcher

"Right get her to the ambulance I'll finish checking her over on the way" said Gordon

"Ash" said Jonathon

"Yes" replied Ash

"I'll take those" said Jonathon trying to take the bags

Ash let them go

"Aisling" said Sister trying to take her hand

They got into the ambulance

"Boy's upfront please, quickly" said Gordon as he got into the back with Ash, Sister and Rob

"Ash, I need you to stay awake a little longer okay" said Gordon

"Can you tell me where it hurts" asked Gordon

"All over" replied Ash

"Aisling that it not helpful" replied Sister

"Hey Ash, I'm just going to pop this mask on to help you breath, okay" said Rob

Ash didn't want the mask on all she wanted was to go to sleep

"Ash you have to keep this on" said Gordon

"Aisling, will you do as you are told" said Sister

"I'm just going to look in your eyes" he added

"Hey Ash, you did a good job back there" said Rob doing a good job of keeping Ash calm Gordon was glad he was here

"You were right about those patients, wasn't she doc" Rob continued

"Yes, spot on" said Gordon

He was checking her over he didn't like the look of her left arm, or the fact she still couldn't move her legs. It looked like she had broken ribs and maybe internal bleeding and she had at best a bad concussion.

The ambulance pulled up into the bay, Jill, matron and Katie were stood outside waiting nervously, Jill had discharged herself after the x-rays had come back clear

Jill opened the doors

"Ash, sweetheart" said Jill

"Mum" said Ash

"Yes, sweetheart" said Jill taking her hand as they wheeled her to casualty

Ash was still trying to fight them off and kept trying to take the mask off

"Ash, sweetheart, leave it on please" said Jill

"Where are the others" asked Gordon

"Still in theatre" replied Jill knowing that this was looking more and more like a brain injury

"I'm going to have to do it" said Gordon

Jill nodded

"Kid's, sister, can you wait outside please" said Jill

"Mum" said Katie

"It's alright, I'll explain everything when we've got Ash settled" replied Jill

"Yes, come on let's give them some space" said Matron ushering them out

Gordon placed Ash into an induced coma, Jill then ran all of the normal test and x-rays they were sat waiting for the results when the other doctors came through and took over Ash's care

"I'm so sorry, baby girl" whispered Jill in Ash's ear as they wheeled her through to the operating theatre

They went to the others sister was pacing up and down and the others were talking quietly to matron trying to find out what was going on

"Mum" said Jonathon

"She's just gone into theatre" said Gordon

"If anything happens to her, I will never forgive you" said Sister to Jill

Jill turned out of the room she was already beating herself up but now sister was even blaming her


	65. Chapter 65

"Mum" said Tom getting up and running after her

"As if you can talk" said Jonathon following Tom

"Just leave us all alone" said Katie following Jonathon out

"As if Jill would ever knowingly put her in danger" said Gordon as he and matron followed the others out

Sister was left on her own she was still pacing up and down

"Please, god don't let anything happen to her, please" muttered sister

"Mum" said Tom when she had stopped in the garden

"I'm fine, she's right" said Jill

"No" said Matron

"Yes, if it wasn't for me she never would have been there" replied Jill

"No one is to blame it was an accident" replied Gordon

"Can you give us a minute" he said to the others leading Jill away

"Sweetheart, you are not to blame" said Gordon taking her into his arms

"Yes, I am" said Jill sobbing

"If I hadn't of thought of her helping Lizzie, she would have been at home" added Jill

"No don't do this" replied Gordon

"If I hadn't of gone to see that patient instead of taking her straight home" replied Jill

"No, Jill" said Gordon

"If you hadn't taken her, that could be you in there or worse" added Gordon

"If I hadn't gone in the building" replied Jill

"Then you wouldn't be doing your job" replied Matron

"Look, you are not to blame, and this is not helping Ash in any way" added Matron

"From what I hear Ash is the reason the rest of you got out, you should be proud of her" said one of the doctors coming over

"What's happened" asked Jill concerned

"Nothing it's all going well, I thought I would come and update you" replied the doctor

"Thank god" replied Gordon

"Well, the swelling on her brain has gone down but it's still touch and go, the internal bleeding has been dealt with and we're just sorting out her arm" replied the doctor

"What about her spine" asked Tom

"It looks like bruising we will be able to tell you more in the next twenty-four to forty-eight hours" replied the doctor

"Thank goodness" said Tom

"That's good news" said Katie

"It's still touch and go" replied Jill

"How much longer" asked Jonathon

"Not long now" replied the doctor leaving them to it

"I'm just going to pop to my office" said Jill

"Mum" said Katie

"It's alright, just give her a little time" said Gordon

"Let's get you lot a drink and something to eat" added Matron

She knew they wouldn't feel much like eating they were all too worried about both Jill and Ash, they met sister in the hall

"I'm sorry" said Sister

"Don't talk to us" said Jonathon

"Jonathon" said Gordon

"I think its Jill you need to apologise to" replied Matron

"Where is she" asked Sister looking around

"She needs some time" replied Gordon

Sister left them to it and went back to the waiting room the rest of them went into the kitchen

"I'll make mum a drink" said Katie

"Let me take it" replied Matron getting up she left Gordon to explain what was going on with Ash

Matron tapped on Jill's door

Jill wiped her eyes then said "Come in"

"Sorry" added Jill

"My dear, you've nothing to be sorry for, I've brought you a nice cup of tea" said Matron

She could see Jill had been crying Matron handed the cup to Jill and then took a seat

"Thank you" replied Jill

Jill didn't want a cup of tea but she guessed Matron knew that, this was Matrons way of breaking the ice and probably stopping the others from bringing it. Matron didn't say anything she knew Jill would talk in her own time

They sat there for a couple of minutes Jill just staring at her tea she took a sip

"How are the others doing" she asked Matron

"They are fine, I left Gordon explaining, they are worried about you" replied Matron

"I'm fine, there's nothing wrong with me" replied Jill

"You know that's not what I meant" replied Matron

"There is nothing you could have done differently" added matron

Jill shook her head and went to say something

"There are a lot of what if's, but going over it you wouldn't have done it any differently" added matron

"She was so happy this morning, when we told her she would be working here" replied Jill

"See, you were only looking out for her and she knows that, you only wanted what was best for her, there is no one to blame" replied Matron

"But Sister" replied Jill

"Sister, blurted it out without thinking, she didn't really mean it and the others told her a few home truths" replied Matron

Before they could talk any more there was a knock at the door

"Come in" said Jill she then took a sip of tea

"Mum" said Jonathon concerned

"I'm fine really, Matron and I have had a good chat" replied Jill getting up and pulling them all into a hug

Gordon could tell she was putting on a brave face in front of every one he knew he would be doing the same in her position

"Any news" asked Jill

Gordon shook his head

"Shall we wait in the conservatory, there's a bit more room in there" said Gordon

They made their way in silence along the corridors to the conservatory they pulled their chairs close for once there was no arguments on where they sat they didn't really care they just wanted to be as close to each other as possible

They sat in silence half an hour later the surgeon came along

"Jill, Gordon" he said

"It's alright, you can say it to all of us" replied Gordon taking Jill's hand

"She's come through the surgery, but it's still touch and go" replied the surgeon

"Thank god" said Jill breathing a sigh of relief

"Can we see her" asked Jonathon

"Yes" replied the surgeon who left them too it

"She will still be in an induced coma" stated Gordon


	66. Chapter 66

"Kid's she will still be in an induced coma" said Jill seeing that they were not taking it in

"Will she be able to hear us" asked Tom

"We believe so" replied Gordon

"How long will she be in the coma" asked Katie worried

"We don't know for sure it could be day's or week's" replied Gordon

"Matron, can you take Tom and Jonathon to see Ash, we're just going to have a quick chat" said Jill seeing something was up

"What's wrong" asked Tom

"Nothing, I just need a quick word with Katie" replied Jill

The others went off and Jill, Katie and Gordon sat back down

"Sweetheart, what is it" asked Jill

"Nothing, I'm just being silly" replied Katie getting up

"Sit down, tell us" said Gordon

Katie sat back down

"What if she doesn't wake up" asked Katie

"She will" replied Gordon

Jill looked at Katie and Gordon

"Gordon why don't you go and find Sister and let her know the news" said Jill

Gordon got up and went to leave

"She will get better" he said trying to convince himself as much as Jill and Katie

"Sweetheart, what's bothering you" asked Jill

"Well how do we know she will wake up" asked Katie

"To tell you the truth we don't, we just have to wait and see" replied Jill

"Why do you ask" added Jill

"Well, mum never woke up did she" replied Katie

"Sweetheart" replied Jill

"No matter what presents we brought her nothing made a difference" replied Katie

"Well, Ash has her age in her favour and the fact that she was awake and talking when they brought her in" said Jill

Katie starting crying

"Sweetheart, come here" said Jill getting up and giving Katie a hug

"I'm sorry" replied Katie

"Sweetheart, you have nothing to be sorry for, this has brought back a lot of horrible memories" replied Jill

Just then Gordon came back to find out what was going on

"Jill, Katie" said Gordon worried

"Dad" said Katie bursting into tears again

"I don't know if I can go through it again" added Katie

"Yes, you can we will all do it together, if it gets too much just tell us and we can talk about it" replied Jill

"Thanks" replied Katie

"Right let's go and join the others" replied Gordon

"I'm just going to freshen up" replied Katie leaving them alone

"What was that all about" asked Gordon as they made their way along

"It has brought back a few memories about Caroline" said Jill

"Is she alright" asked Gordon

"I think so, I think she thinks they didn't do enough and that's why she died" replied Jill

"That's not true" replied Gordon

"That's what I said, we are just going to have to keep a close eye on her, it's hit her pretty hard" replied Jill as they made their way along

Half an hour had passed and everyone was talking amongst themselves, Jill was talking to Katie answering her questions as best she could about the prognosis and what was going on when Sister came to the door

"Jill, I'm sorry about before" said Sister Brigid

"Go away" said Tom

"Tom Ormerod that is no way to speak to sister" said Jill

"Sorry" replied Tom

"No I deserve it, I know you would never do anything to hurt her" replied Sister

"Come in" replied Jill

"No I can't stay long, I just have one question was she on her way to meet me" asked Sister

Up until now they had forgotten about the note

"You mean the note?" asked Gordon

Sister nodded, so she had talked about it she thought and was excited that she was finally getting through to Ash about who she had to be

"She never even read it" added Gordon

"Well how did you know where to find me" asked Sister puzzled

"When we rang the convent and they told us you had gone, Gordon read the note" said Matron who had stayed quiet until now

"How did you have it" asked Sister

"She gave it to me for safe keeping until she felt ready to read it" replied Gordon

"So she was never going to come" replied Sister as it finally dawned on her

"I thought she was going to be like me, I had it all planned" continued Sister

"I can't do this now" said Jill getting up and leaving the room her head was starting to ache

"Mum, wait" said Katie getting up and following her out

"What's wrong with her" asked Sister

"This is not the time or place" said Gordon getting up to check on Jill

After Gordon had left Sister looked at her watch

"Well can you tell them I've got to go, this is where they can get hold of me day or night" said Sister scribbling contact details on the bottom of the chart

"Why can't you stay here now you know she wasn't going" asked Jonathon

"It's not that simple you wouldn't understand" replied Sister

"It looks simple to me, when she needs you here you run away because you don't like the fact she doesn't want to be what you want her to" replied Jonathon

Sister looked to Matron for support which didn't come

"Well I've made commitments I just can't get out of" replied Sister

"Well if they are that important" replied Tom sarcastically

Sister choose to ignore that comment

"Please Matron" pleaded Sister

"I promise I will explain everything properly when I get back to them" added Sister

Matron nodded and with that Sister left a few minutes later when the others re-entered with drinks for everyone and Jill had taken a couple more aspirin to help with her head ache

"Where is Sister" asked Jill

"You had better sit down" said Matron

"What is it" asked Jill and Gordon slightly panicked they both looked straight at the machines to check on Ash's vital signs

"No Ash is fine" started Matron

"It's Sister" butted in Jonathon

Jill and Gordon sat down relieved and handed everyone a drink

"Sister has gone, without even saying goodbye to Ash" added Tom

"It was more important to her to go, but she wants you to keep her up to date, day or night" added Jonathon

"Well we will see about that" replied Gordon

"Did she leave a number" asked Jill

"It's on here" replied Matron handing over the chart to Gordon

"I'm so sorry, baby girl" said Jill rubbing Ash's cheek

"Dad did you see that" asked Katie

"No, what" asked Gordon

"Did anyone see it" asked Katie now doubting herself, everyone shook their heads


	67. Chapter 67

"What" asked Gordon

"When mum talked to her and touched her, I thought I saw her signs change" replied Katie

"Do it again mum" said Jonathon and Tom excited

"Everything is going to be alright, sweetheart" said Jill while rubbing her cheek

Everyone was sat watching the machines for any change, Katie even had her fingers crossed and was hoping she hadn't imagined it

"See there" said Katie relieved that it wasn't a fluke

"Don't get too excited" started Jill seeing them all getting ahead of themselves

"It's a good sign though" replied Tom

"Yes, but she is still in a critical condition" replied Gordon

Jill sat back down she was starting to feel stiff, she was holding Ash's hand and gently rubbing her thumb on the back of her hand. With her other hand she was gently massaging her own head, her head was starting to get worse

"Mum, are you alright" asked Katie concerned

"I'm fine it's just been a long day" replied Jill

"Right I'm taking you home" replied Gordon

Jill went to say something

"You need your rest as much as Ash" added Gordon

"I will stay" said Jonathon

"So will I" added Tom

"And I'll be here" added Matron

"We can't ask you to" replied Jill

"You are not I want to be here and you need to rest" replied Matron

Jill knew she was beat and made to get up she felt a little light headed Gordon gave her his arm

Katie got up as well she didn't feel strong enough to go through this without one of her parents by her side

"Where are you going" asked Jonathon

"I'm" started Katie

Jill could tell that she didn't feel comfortable telling the others the truth and wasn't feeling up to staying

"Katie" said Jill

"Yes mum" replied Katie

"Could you come back with us and pick up my car on the way home" asked Jill

"Yes of course, mum" replied Katie

They walked in silence to the car

"Mum, thanks for back there" said Katie when they were in the car

"No problem, you know the others would understand" replied Jill

"I know; I just rather keep it between us" replied Katie

"Right, can you drive the car straight home" said Gordon getting in

"Yes dad" replied Katie she had no intention of going anywhere else tonight

They drove the way in silence, when they pulled up alongside Jill's car they all couldn't help but stop and stare at the building site which was probably the worst thing they could have done

Jill put her hand to her mouth, Gordon put a hand on Jill's shoulder

"It looks worse now, then it was, they had to make it safe after we left" said Gordon

"How did she get out of that alive" asked Katie

"Like I said, it's worse now" replied Gordon doing his best to put their minds at rest

"Mum, can I have your keys please" asked Katie not wanting to be there a minute longer

Jill handed Katie the keys, Katie got out and went straight to the car and drove off without even looking back, Jill and Gordon followed

They arrived home Gordon had persuaded Jill to go upstairs and get some rest. He had been sat talking to Katie for a while but she too had gone upstairs to bed

Gordon was sat on his own in his favourite chair away with his thoughts and empty glass on the table in front of him when he heard footsteps on the stairs

"Ash" he said without even thinking getting up and going to the hallway

"Dad, are you alright" asked Katie

"Yes, yes I'm fine" replied Gordon looking at his watch and seeing they had only been home for a few hours

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you" replied Katie

"What's wrong" asked Gordon trying to turn the conversation around

"Nothing I just had this feeling" replied Katie

Before anything else could be said the phone rang

"Ormerod" said Gordon

"Dad" said Jonathon at the other end

"What is it, what's wrong" asked Gordon panicked

Jill had woken at the sound of the phone and was making her way down stairs

"Ash has a slight temperature" said Jonathon getting right to the point

"Okay, I'll be right there" replied Gordon

"And boys don't worry" he added

"Bye" said Jonathon putting the phone down

"What's wrong" asked Katie just as Jill had joined them

"Nothing" replied Gordon trying his best to stay calm and keep Jill here resting

"Don't lie to me Gordon" replied Jill

"That was Jonathon wasn't it" asked Katie

Gordon nodded

"Ash has a slight temperature" replied Gordon

"Right wait there, I'm coming with you" said Jill not waiting for a reply and going upstairs

"So am I" added Katie running upstairs

They quickly got dressed, Jill was first down she was feeling slightly better now she had rested for a couple of hours but her head still ached, once Katie had joined them they made their way in silence to the hospital

Meanwhile back at the hospital Jonathon had made his way back to the room

"How is she" he asked as he made his way in

"About the same the paracetamol seems to be doing the trick" replied Matron

"Well did you get hold of them" asked Tom

"Yeah, dad's on his way" replied Jonathon

"You hear that Ash, dad's coming back to see you" said Tom giving her hand a gentle squeeze

After that they too sat in silence

"Should we try and get hold of sister" asked Katie as they walked down the corridor

"We'll see" replied Gordon opening the door

"Dad" said a relieved Jonathon

"Jill" said a surprised Matron

"You should still be resting" she added concerned she was pushing herself too hard

Gordon pulled up a chair for Jill and Katie and then persuaded Matron and the boys to go for a drink

Once they had left

"Sweetheart, matron is right you should still be at home resting" said Gordon

"Don't start this again" replied Jill taking Ash's hand

"What have we been telling Ash" replied Gordon

Jill didn't reply she just gave Gordon a look that said don't try my patience but he carried on regardless

"Not to push herself too hard, it's going to be awhile before we do any more tests why don't you go home and rest for a couple more hours, she won't know any different" said Gordon doing his best to look after them both

"I will, I need to be here" replied Jill

"Dad, I think mum would rest better here rather than be at home waiting for the phone to ring" added Katie

"Yes, thank you Katie at least somebody understands" replied Jill

"I'll just go and see if the boys are alright" said Gordon knowing there was nothing he could do or say to make Jill change her mind

"I'm so sorry baby girl, I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere" said Jill quietly

They were sat in silence

"What are you thinking about" Jill asked Katie

"Nothing, It's a stupid idea anyway" replied Katie

"Try me" replied Jill

"Well I was thinking, if she can hear us" started Katie she paused trying to find the right way to say the next part

"Well I was thinking, no it's a rubbish idea" started Katie wishing she hadn't said anything now she looked up at Jill who was willing her to continue

"Well what if we brought her music in for her to listen to" said Katie quickly

"That is a brilliant idea, I'll get your dad to go home and get it" replied Jill

"Well that wasn't the only idea" said Katie now she had a little more confidence to talk about it

Jill nodded her head as if to say well go on then

"Well what if we were to read to her, so she can hear us" added Katie

"Katie you are a genius" replied Jill smiling she got up and gave Katie a big hug and a kiss

"Right well, me and the boys will go home and get it sorted" said Katie

"There's no rush" replied Jill

"I know; I feel like I have to do something" replied Katie

"I tell you what why don't we give this idea of yours a go until the others come back" replied Jill

"How? we don't have anything" asked Katie

"Yes, we do, why don't you go and grab a magazine from the waiting room" replied Jill

Katie ran out of the room

"Walk" sighed Jill she then sat back down

"We don't want any more accidents do we" said Jill to Ash

"Sorry doctor" said a nurse

"Yes" replied Jill

"Is it alright if I do some obs" replied the nurse

"Of course" replied Jill

Jill looked at the results and was happy that her temperature seemed to be coming down

"This is the best I could find" said Katie making her way in

"Perfect" replied Jill


	68. Chapter 68

Jill started to read some of the stories looking up every now and again at the machines she noticed that Katie was starting to drift off as well so she continued to read until the others came back, as soon as she stopped Katie woke up

"Whats wrong" she asked

"Nothing's wrong, your dad was just saying he's going to take the boys home, do you want to go as well and make a start on that idea" replied Jill

"But who will be here with you" asked Katie

"Don't worry about me, I've got Ash" replied Jill

"I'll be here as well" added Matron

"Okay" said Katie reluctantly

They all said goodbye to Matron, Jill and Ash then went on their way

"So what's this idea then" asked Gordon as he followed Katie down the corridor

Katie told them all about her ideas on the way home

Gordon went straight up to bed seeing as he had work in a few hours

"So can we help" asked Jonathon

"Yeah, let us help" added Tom

"Okay, but we have to keep the noise down" replied Katie

They set to work making up tapes of different songs, and looking for the latest book that Ash was reading but they couldn't find it anywhere and then Katie remembered Ash's things were in Jill's car and that Jill had put it along with her things in the office

They were still in the front room when Gordon came down, they had taken it in turns to have a rest while the others tried to make a tape for Ash with her favourite songs on although all of them were ashamed they didn't know what they were so it was more of their favourite songs maybe they could ask Jill if she had any ideas and do some more

"Have you been up all this time" he asked

"Yes, sorry didn't realise how the time had gotten on" replied Katie getting up and following the others to the kitchen

"Right, well let's get something to eat, then it's off to bed with the lot of you" he stated

They went to say something but Gordon got in there first

"No arguments, I will come and pick you up at lunchtime" replied Gordon sitting down with his breakfast

"Just agree, we can always get the bus in later" whispered Tom to Katie and Jonathon

Gordon was away with his own thoughts he didn't even register that they were whispering to each other

They sat having their breakfast in silence

"Right well I will be back later" said Gordon getting up and going towards the door

"Dad" said Katie

"Yes" replied Gordon turning back around

"Can you give this to mum" said Jonathon handing over Ash's personal stereo

"Yes of course, she will love it" said Gordon

"Now, bed all of you" he added going out the door

Once Gordon had left the kids all went upstairs they had agreed that they would try and get a couple of hours sleep but this turned out to be impossible so they all decided to get ready and go into the hospital anyway they were just leaving to catch the bus when the phone rang, they all froze

"I'll get it then" said Katie going to the phone

"Ormerod" said Katie shakily

"Hello Katie, sorry did I wake you" asked Jill

"What's wrong" asked Katie panicked

"Nothing, I was just talking to dad and wanted to check that you were all alright" replied Jill

"Yeah, we're fine we were just going to catch the bus" replied Katie

"Don't do that you can use the car" replied Jill

"Thanks mum, see you in a minute" replied Katie

"Ohh, Katie" said Jill checking she was still on the line

"Yes" replied Katie

"Could you do me a favour and bring some things in, I did asked dad but he forgot" started Jill

Katie grabbed the pad and pen that were by the phone and made a list of what was needed, once Jill had finished Katie hung up

"What was that all about" asked Tom

"Mum, wanted to know how we were, and wanted us to get a few things that dad forgot" replied Katie

"We'll never get the bus now" replied Jonathon

"We don't have to" replied Katie holding the car keys up

The boys both looked at her

"It's alright mum said we could" she added

"Right what do we need to get" asked Jonathon

"Well if you can find the paperwork, I'll get the rest" replied Katie going straight upstairs to her parents' bedroom

Katie was busy packing a few bits in a bag when the boys came to help

"So what else do we need" asked Tom

"That's it in here, there's just a few things to grab from Ash's room" replied Katie

They all went through to Ash's room, they quickly grabbed what they needed and left

"So how did mum sound" asked Jonathon

"Fine, just a bit tired" replied Katie

"Have they talked to sister" asked Tom

"How would I know" replied Katie

"Well you were with the more yesterday than we were" retorted tom

That was it by the time they arrived at the royal they were having a full blown argument, Gordon was outside talking to a patient when they pulled up Gordon made his excuses and went over to them

"What's going on here" Gordon asked

"Katie said we were allowed to use the car" said Tom

"I don't mean that, I was there when Mum said she could, I mean all the shouting" replied Gordon

"See" said Katie to Tom she then turned back to Gordon adding "Well it all started when Tom asked some stupid questions"

"No, I didn't, you just didn't have the answers" replied Tom

"Right well, we will hear no more about this, mum has enough to deal with without this silliness as well" replied Gordon

Just then Jill came outside for some fresh air and to see if the others had arrived yet, while Ash was being taken for a scan

"What's all this" said Jill as she walked towards them

"What's wrong" asked Jonathon

"Nothing, she is having a routine scan, so I thought I would stretch my legs and see if you were here yet, so what is this all about" replied Jill

"It's nothing, just Tom and Katie having words that's all" replied Gordon

"About what" asked Jill

"Well, Tom was asking me stupid questions" replied Katie

"Was not" replied Tom

"What questions, maybe we could help" said Jill

"Whether you had talked to sister yet" replied Katie

"Yeah and she said how would I know" added Tom

That was it the squabbling started all over again

"That's when Tom replied you were with them more yesterday" added Jonathon

"Right, thank you Jonathon" said Gordon

"Kids, stop this right now" said Jill raising her voice

They both stopped and looked at Jill, they both noticed how tired she seemed and how this wasn't helping the situation

"Sorry" they both said

"Right, well, I can answer your question, yes I have talked to sister on the phone this morning, so Katie would not have known, so you can both say sorry to each other" replied Jill

They both apologised to each other

"So is she coming back" asked Katie

"No, not until the following weekend" replied Gordon

Just then Matron came out

"Jill, Gordon they are taking her back through now" said Matron

"Okay thanks, I'll be right there" said Jill making her way in

"Right, it stops now, do you hear me" said Gordon

"Yes dad" all three said

"Look we have to be strong for each other, for Ash's sake if no-one else's" replied Gordon

"I know we are all tired and saying things we don't really mean, so let's just forget about it and be there for mum and Ash" added Gordon


	69. Chapter 69

Katie went back towards the car to get the bags

"Boy's you go on" said Gordon

"Katie, are you sure you're alright" asked Gordon taking the bags from her

"I'm fine dad, really don't worry about me" replied Katie shutting the boot and locking the car

"Well you know where we are" replied Gordon as they made their way in

"Thanks dad, but I'm fine really" replied Katie not fooling him for a second

Gordon didn't say any more about it, it hoped he would be able to let Jill and Katie have some time alone together a bit later to have a chat about whatever was bothering her

"There you are what happened to you two" asked Jill as they entered the room

"Well someone had to get the bags" replied Gordon

"Right seeing as you are all here, I'm just going to go and change quickly" said Jill grabbing a bag and leaving them to it

"How's she been" asked Katie

"Which one" asked Matron

"Both" asked Katie

"Well, Ash has had a stable night her temperature has stayed down, which is the best we could have hoped for at this stage" replied Gordon

"And mum" asked Jonathon

"Pretty much as you expect, she still seems to blame herself and hasn't really slept at all" replied Matron

"What can we do" asked Katie

"There's nothing we can do; we just have to be there for each other" replied Gordon

"Right, I might just go and leave you all too it, I'll be back later, but call me if anything changes" said Matron

"Yes, thank you for everything" replied Gordon

"Bye Ash, we will finish that story off later" said Matron

She then said bye to the others and left, she met Jill in the corridor and told her she would be back later and to look after her self

"Right, that's better" said Jill walking back in and taking her seat

"Gordon, I think Lizzie was looking for you" she added quickly seeing that Gordon was about to say something

"Well I'll be back later then, take care" he replied leaving them to it

It was lunch time when they saw both Matron and Gordon again they had spent the rest of the morning taking it in turns to read a few pages of Ash's book

"Good Afternoon" said Matron as she walked in carrying a tray of drinks followed by Gordon carrying a tray of sandwiches

"Hello" replied the others

Twenty minutes later they were all talking amongst themselves Jill was away with her own thoughts thinking about the night she and Ash had, had a heart to heart in her car and was just picking at her sandwich

"Right has everyone finished" asked Gordon collecting the plates

"Jill" he asked

"Mum, Mum are you okay" asked Katie concerned

"Yes, I'm fine" replied Jill

"Have you finished" asked Gordon

"Yes, thank you" replied Jill handing over her plate which still had half a sandwich untouched on it

Before they could ask what, it was that Jill had been thinking about one of the Doctors came in with Ash's scan results

"Sorry to interrupt" he said

"No problem, I'll just get rid of these" replied Gordon

"Dad, I'll take them" replied Katie

"Carry on without me" she added not sure she was ready to hear the results

Once Katie had left the doctor continued

"Well it's good news really, there doesn't appear to be any damage to the spine" he started

"So she will be able to walk" asked Tom

"Tom don't interrupt; we will not know that until she wakes up" replied Gordon

"Sorry" replied Tom

"That's alright Tom, the other thing was if things stay the same we will try to wake her up tomorrow" replied the doctor

"That's fantastic" replied Jonathon

"Right well I will leave you to it" added the doctor

"I'll just go and find Katie" said Jill

"Okay, I'll stay here until you come back" replied Gordon he followed Jill out and shut the door behind them

"What's wrong" asked Gordon

"What if it's too soon" replied Jill

"Well look at it this way, if that wasn't Ash in there and we were the doctors what would we be saying with these results in front of us" replied Gordon

"Yes, I know you are right, it's just that's our baby girl in there" replied Jill

"Yes and that is how I know that she is going to be just fine" replied Gordon giving her a hug

Katie came along the corridor and found them outside the room in deep conversation so hung back then when they were cuddling she thought that it would be bad news

"No" she gasped

"Katie" said Jill turning around

"Come here" added Jill gesturing for her to join them

"It's alright, it's not bad news" added Gordon

Katie joined them

"They are going to try to wake her tomorrow" said Jill

"That's good isn't it" asked Katie

"Yes, very and there doesn't appear to be any spinal damage" replied Gordon

"Are you alright" asked Jill as Katie started to cry

"I'm sorry, you should be in there instead of out here looking for me" replied Katie

"Hey we will have none of that you are all important to me, and I understand why you are finding this difficult" replied Jill

"Right I must get back, but I will be back later" replied Gordon

Jill and Katie stayed outside a little longer, Jill could tell something wasn't right but wanted to wait for the right moment

"Right are you ready to go back in" asked Jill

Katie nodded she took Jill's hand and followed her in

"There you are, we thought you got lost or something" said Tom

"Tom" said Jill warningly

"I was just talking to someone" replied Katie

"Who" asked Tom now intrigued

"So where were we with the story" asked Katie changing the subject

"I think it was my turn" replied Jill picking up the book and starting to read

Tom sat there in a sulk he hated being left out of anything and he knew Katie was doing this on purpose he refused to take his turn reading

"Tom, if you are going to be like that I think it is best you wait outside" said Jill

Tom got up and as he left

"It's all your fault" he said to Katie

Jill put her hand on Katie's arm which made her look at her she then shook her head when Tom had left

"Right Jonathon carry on reading please" said Jill

"Mum, I'm sorry, maybe I should go" said Katie

"No, you stay right where you are, I will go and talk to him in a minute" replied Jill

"But if I had just told him" started Katie

"Look he cannot know everything all of the time" replied Jill

Jonathon carried on reading, Jill was starting to get a headache and the kids bickering did not help they were supposed to be grown-ups after all, they were acting like a moody group of teenagers. Tomorrow couldn't come quickly enough at least that might help them behave a bit better

Gordon came along the corridor to find Tom stood outside pacing up and down

"Tom, what is it" asked Gordon panicked that something had gone horribly wrong

"Mum, sent me out" replied Tom

Gordon could see he was in a foul mood

"Right come with me" said Gordon leading him towards his office they walked the way in silence

"Wait here" said Gordon leaving Tom in his office he went back along to the others

"Jill can I have a word please" said Gordon

"Yes" said Jill getting up and going out she shut the door behind her

"What do you think that's about" asked Jonathon

"I'll give you one guess" replied Katie

"Tom" replied Jonathon

"Yep, I bet he's got mum in trouble" replied Katie

"NO, I don't think that would be the case" replied Matron

Meanwhile outside

"What's going on why was Tom out here" asked Gordon

"Where is he" asked Jill looking around

"In my office, he said you had sent him out" replied Gordon

"He was being sulky and wouldn't join in because Katie didn't tell him who she had been talking to so yes I sent him outside" replied Jill her head was starting to get worse

"Why just him" asked Gordon

"He was the only one acting up, and there is enough going on without them all acting like toddlers" replied Jill

"So yes, I sent him out because I needed a break" added Jill

"So why don't you go home" tried Gordon

"Look I do not need to go home, maybe you should take Tom home" replied Jill ending the conversation and going back in

"Mum" said Jonathon

Jill put her hand up as if to say I don't want to talk about it

"I'm so sorry" said Katie getting up and running out

"Katie" said Jill

"I'll go" said Jonathon going after her

Katie had followed Gordon all the way to his office planning on having a word with him only when she opened the door things went a different way

"I hope you are happy with yourself" Katie said to Tom

"You are the one that caused this" replied Tom

"I'm not the one sulking" replied Katie

"No, of course you're not" replied Tom sarcastically

"That's enough, what did I tell you outside" said Gordon but neither of them listened

Jonathon had gone back for Jill

"Mum, come quickly" he said not waiting for a reply and leaving again

"I'll be back in a minute" said Jill getting up and following Jonathon she didn't have to ask what was going on she could hear it clearly for herself

"What's that supposed to mean, you made mum and dad fight because you don't like being left out" shouted Katie

"Well I'm not the one running out because she's scared of the truth" replied Tom

"Right that is enough" said Jill

Tom went to say something

"I said that is enough, now you can either say sorry to each other and talk to each other normally or you can go home until you can act in a reasonable manner" said Jill

They were all silent for a while

"I'm sorry, I owe you an apology" said Gordon now seeing what Jill had been putting up with and why she had sent Tom out

"Apology accepted" replied Jill

"Well you heard your mother" said Gordon

"Sorry" said Katie

"Good, right Tom your turn" replied Gordon

"Sorry" whispered Tom

"We didn't hear that" replied Gordon

"Sorry" replied Tom louder

"Right, well now that is all sorted, Tom you stay here, I've got a ward round to do then you are going home with me" stated Gordon

"That's not fair, it's not me that keeps running out" sulked Tom

"No but it's you causing the arguments" replied Gordon

"Well what about the others" said Tom

"Well it's up to them, they can stay for a bit or if mum's happy to let Katie drive her car they can go home" replied Gordon

They all looked at Jill

"Mum" asked Jonathon

"Of course she can drive the car" said Jill

"Do you mind if we stay a little longer" asked Katie

"Of course not just promise no more arguments" replied Jill

"Promise" replied Katie and Jonathon

"Right now that is sorted you two go on ahead I've just got to pop to my office" said Jill

Gordon followed her out

"Sweetheart, are you alright" asked Gordon

"Just a headache, you" asked Jill taking some aspirin out of her desk drawer

"I am very sorry" replied Gordon

"I know, I probably would have done the same" replied Jill giving him a peck on the cheek

"You know it would all be easier if Katie just told them" said Gordon

"Well it's her decision and Tom should learn to respect other people's privacy" replied Jill


	70. Chapter 70

"Why haven't they tried to take her off of the ventilator yet" asked Jill hoping Gordon would have a little bit more information

"They will in good time" replied Gordon giving her a peck on the cheek as they parted ways

When Jill entered the room the others went to say something

"Look it is all forgotten" said Jill sitting down

"Now can we have a peaceful evening" she added

"Why don't we stop reading to Ash and let her listen to some music" said Katie

"Good idea" said Matron

"Jonathon could you get it from that cupboard" asked Jill

"Yes mum" replied Jonathon getting up and doing as he was told

"Right, I think everyone could do with a drink" said Matron getting up

"I'll give you a hand" said Jonathon

Once they had left

"Mum, is there anything else I can do" asked Katie

"No, what's wrong" asked Jill

"Well, I feel useless" replied Katie

"You are not useless" replied Jill

"Well what I mean is just sitting here it doesn't feel like enough" replied Katie

"Look it is enough and Ash really does apricate all you have done and so do I" said Jill

"Thanks" said Katie shyly

"There really is nothing else, we just have to be patient a little longer, I know it is hard we have to be strong for each other" replied Jill

Katie took Jill's free hand and moved her chair closer so she could rest her head on her shoulder, just then Matron and Jonathon came back in carrying drinks

"Do you need us to leave again" asked Matron

"No we are all good aren't we" replied Jill, Katie nodded

"Is everything alright" asked Jonathon

"Yeah" replied Katie

They talked for a while about nothing much until Gordon came in the room

"Right I'm just going to take Tom home and then I'll be back" said Gordon

"Okay see you in a bit" replied Jill

"Can I get you anything" Gordon asked

"No, I think I've got everything, thanks" replied Jill

"Well I wont be long" replied Gordon leaving

Gordon took Tom home and made them something to eat, Tom then went upstairs to bed while Gordon had a shower and changed his clothes he then made his way back to the royal

Meanwhile at the royal Matron had gone to sort somethings out, Jonathon and Katie had made themselves comfortable either side of Jill and had persuaded her to carry on reading she could feel them slowly falling asleep, unable to move and make them more comfortable she carried on reading until Gordon arrived

"How's Tom" Jill asked

"He's fine he was sound asleep when I left" replied Gordon looking at Ash's notes

"How are you" asked Jill

"I'm fine more to the point how are you" replied Gordon

"I'm fine" replied Jill trying to shift her weight slightly to get more comfortable without waking Jonathon or Katie

"How's your head" asked Gordon helping to put a blanket over each of the kids

"It's fine, thanks" replied Jill

They had decided to let the Kids sleep for a while before Gordon would take them home meanwhile they talked about Gordon's day he was asking Jill her advice when one of the doctors came in

"What is it, what's wrong" asked Jill

"It's nothing to worry about, I'm just checking before I go for the night" replied the Doctor picking up her notes and having a look

"When are you going to try to take her off the ventilator" asked Jill

"Well looking at these results, we could try it now" replied the doctor

"I'll just go and get a nurse" he added putting the notes down

"No need I'll help" replied Gordon wanting to get it over with as quickly as possible

Jill moved so she could hold Ash's hand waking both Katie and Jonathon

"Mum, what is it" asked a groggy Katie

"We are going to try to take her off of the ventilator" replied the Doctor

"Everything is going to be fine" added Gordon

Jill took Katie's hand and squeezed it

"What about Tom" asked Jonathon

"We don't have time to wait for him" replied Gordon

He didn't wait for anything else to be said he just got to work

"Please, please" whispered Jill

They switched the machine off

"How long does it take" asked Katie

"Is she breathing" asked Jonathon not giving them time to answer Katie's question

"Ssshhh" replied Gordon getting his stethoscope and trying to listen then he nodded

"Yes" replied Katie and Jonathon excited

"She's a little fighter" said the doctor

"What happens know" asked Katie

"Well we take the ventilator out and place a mask over her and then tomorrow we start to wake her up" replied the doctor

"Thank you" replied Katie

"Right if you are alright here, I'll go and make a few calls" said Jill

"Yes of course" replied Gordon

"I, won't be long" replied Jill more to Ash than the others

Jill came back after having made the calls to Tom, Matron, Bunty and Sister anyone else could wait until the morning

"Right that's all done" said Jill taking her seat

Jill and Gordon were sat talking for another hour Katie and Jonathon kept nodding off

"I think you had better take them home" said Jill

"No, we are staying" replied Katie stubbornly

"Look nothing else is going to happen tonight and it's going to be a long day tomorrow" replied Jill

Katie went to say something

"Mum's right, I will bring you all back first thing" added Gordon

"You promise" replied Jonathon

"We promise" replied Jill

"Okay then" replied Jonathon

"Please let me stay" pleaded Katie

"You'll be more comfortable at home" replied Gordon

"Mum" pleaded Katie

"Let her stay if she wants to" replied Jill knowing there was more to this

"Well if Katie's staying so am I" added Jonathon

"Okay, go to the kitchen and make yourselves something to eat then" replied Jill

They both did as they were told they decided they were going to make Jill something as well they both wanted to partly stay to look after Jill as well as to be there for Ash.

When they went back Gordon had left to go home but Matron had come back and was reading to Ash

"Mum, this is for you" whispered Jonathon passing Jill a sandwich and a cup of tea

"Thank you" replied Jill

They took their seats and made themselves comfortable and it wasn't long until they were fast asleep

Matron had given up reading about an hour ago after getting to the end of a chapter and was sat chatting to Jill they stayed that way until about six in the morning when Gordon and Tom joined them.

They had only been in the room for five minutes when they were joined by one of the doctors and a nurse

"Morning" said the nurse handing the doctor the notes

"Morning" replied the others

"Right, let's get this started" said the doctor

Once the doctor and nurse had done what they need to and left Jill and Gordon explained what was happening and that it would take a while for Ash to wake up and they were slowly reducing the amount of sedation, Gordon then went to work, Matron went off to make some calls and to get some rest she wouldn't be back until lunchtime.

Tom was apologising to Jill for how he had behaved while the other two went to make drinks, he then apologised to both Jonathon and Katie when they returned

"Right let's hear no more about it" said Jill

"Can I start reading" asked Katie

"Of course you can sweetheart" replied Jill passing over the book

They all took their turn at reading and every now and then a doctor or nurse would come in to check how everything was going

It was now lunchtime and Tom and Jonathon were getting restless

"Why don't you go for a walk" said Jill starting to get frustrated

Before they could Matron and Gordon walked in like the day before with sandwiches and drinks for everyone, when they had finished the boys took the empty dishes and cups and were going for a walk afterwards, Gordon had just gotten up to go back to work

"See you all later" he said as he was going

"Mum, Dad" said Katie excited

"What is it" asked Gordon turning back around

"She moved her fingers" replied Jill taking Ash's hand

"I'll go and get them" said Gordon stepping into the corridor and calling the first nurse over that came along


	71. Chapter 71

Ash was slowly starting to wake she had gripped Jill's hand and was not letting it go but then Jill was not going to let go either, the boys had run back when they heard the news and some of the other staff members including Lizzie had congregated in the corridor outside the room not wanting to be the last one to be told she was finally awake.

Gordon got up and went to the door

"Right, let's all get back to work, I will let you all know when you can all come and see her, but right now we have other patients to deal with" said Gordon he then waited until they slowly left he then went back in and sat on the end of the bed and to let Ash know he was there he gently squeezed her leg just above her ankle

Ash's eyelids fluttered but it was a further half an hour before she fully opened them, that was when the others started their barrage of questions

"How are you" asked Katie

"Can you remember anything" asked Jonathon

"Can you move your legs" asked Tom

None of them gave her time to answer she just look from one person to the next and was trying to take the mask off with her other hand

"No, sweetheart keep it on for a minute" said Jill gently placing her hand on the mask

"Right you lot give her a little time she has only just woken up" said Gordon to the others while Jill was sorting Ash out

"I tell you what why don't you three come with me" said Matron getting up

"But" started Tom

"That's a good idea and when you come back Ash will be ready to answer all of your questions" said Gordon butting in

"Okay, see you in a bit Ash" said Katie as she left

"I don't see why we have to go" said Tom

"Just do it, mum and dad need a little time" whispered Jonathon to Tom

"See you later" said a sulky Tom

"Do you want anything" asked Jonathon

"No thank you, sweetheart I think we have everything" replied Jill

"Okay see you soon" said Jonathon shutting the door behind him

Ash was left with her parents and the doctor

"Right Ash I'm just going to check your eyes is that okay" asked the doctor

Ash went to say something but her throat felt so sore so she just nodded instead

"It's alright your throat will be a bit sore for a little while" said Jill as if reading her mind

Ash squeezed Jill's hand that she was still holding to let her know she understood

"Right that seems to be all fine, I'm just going to listen to your chest" said the doctor

Gordon got up so that the doctor could do his job, Ash's eyes followed him

"It's alright dad's staying he's just giving the doctor some room" said Jill

"Yes, that's right I'm still here" said Gordon moving to stand behind Jill

"That all seems clear, so we can take that mask off for now" said the doctor taking the mask off Ash

Gordon moved back and was sat on the end of the bed again

"Right I just have to ask a few questions" said the doctor

"Do you want a drink" asked Gordon

Ash nodded, Gordon poured a glass of water from the jug sat on the table and then put the glass with a straw up to Ash's lips

"Okay, only little sips" said Gordon

Ash did as she was told she was glad Gordon was holding the glass because that meant she didn't have to let go of Jill's hand

"Enough" asked Gordon

"Yes, thanks" said Ash weakly it also sounded a little hoarse

"Your welcome, just say if you want some more" replied Gordon

"Right Ash do you know where you are" asked the doctor

"In the Royal" replied Ash

She answered all the doctor's questions and they were happy everything seemed fine they all left her to rest

Jill and Gordon went off to talk to the kids and Matron, they found them in the kitchen

"Mum" said Katie

"It's alright, sit down please" said Jill also sitting down

"We have left her sleeping for a minute, because we need to talk to you" said Gordon

"Sounds serious" said Jonathon

"We don't want a repeat of earlier that's all" replied Jill

"We all want to know the answers but, we have to take it slowly" added Gordon

"It is all looking good for now, she can feel her legs but we don't know if she can stand yet it's still too soon" started Jill

"How is she" asked Katie

"She seems fine her throat is a little sore so try not to make her talk too much to start with" replied Gordon

"What does she remember" asked Jonathon

"We haven't gone into that too much, but she can remember some bits and pieces" replied Gordon

"Like we said she just needs time so no rushing her, she is going to get tired quickly so don't go getting her upset" added Jill getting up

"When can we see her" asked Katie

"You can go back now, but not for too long" replied Gordon

"Are you coming dad" asked Jonathon

"No, I'll be back a little later, I've got some patients to see this afternoon and a few phone calls to make" replied Gordon

"What about you matron" asked Katie

"No, you don't need me as well, tell her I'll see her later" replied Matron

They made their way to Ash's room expecting her to be asleep after what their parents had said but she was trying to pull herself up into a sitting position

"Ash, do you need a hand" asked Katie

Ash shook her head she wanted to do this by herself but the pillow kept slipping down

"Wait there" said Jonathon looking out the door and seeing Jill coming down

"What's wrong" asked Jill quickening her pace

"She's trying to sit up" replied Jonathon

"Ash, sweetheart, what are you doing" asked Jill

"She was trying to sit up before we got here" replied Tom

"That's okay isn't it" asked Katie

"Of course, it is" replied Jill going over and helping Ash

"She didn't want our help" replied Tom

"She may not have wanted it Tom, but she needs it" replied Jill

"Is that better" Jill asked Ash who was now in a more comfortable position

"Sorry mum, Ash" said Katie and Jonathon

"Me too" said Ash she then smiled

They sat in silence for a few minutes thinking of things to say that wouldn't upset Ash or Jill. It was Ash who broke the silence

"Mum" said Ash

"Yes, sweetheart" replied Jill

Ash pointed to the glass of water, Jill knew straight away what she wanted

"There you go" said Jill picking it up and giving her the glass,

Ash smiled as if to say thank you, once she had finished Jill took the glass back and placed it on the table

Tom was feeling awkward and kept glancing to the door hoping someone would come through, Ash had noticed and so had Jill

"Tom, can you go and see if your dad got hold of everyone for me" said Jill

"Okay" said Tom getting up and leaving as quickly as possible

"Don't mind him he's in a mood with Katie" said Jonathon

"Why" asked Ash

That was the ice breaker the other two told Ash all about the arguments that had happened between Tom and Katie and how Tom had caused an argument between Gordon and Jill

"It wasn't that bad" said Jill giving the other two be careful what you are saying looks

Ash had a faraway look in her eyes as the story brought back some memories

"Ash" said Katie concerned

"Mum, what's wrong" asked Jonathon

"Ash" said Jill gently squeezing her shoulder

"I'm fine, it just it sounded familiar" replied Ash

"Well they are always fighting" replied Jonathon earning himself a playful hit from Katie

"Or maybe she could hear us" said Katie saying what the others were thinking

"Right that's enough of that for today" said Jill shutting that conversation down not wanting to push Ash too hard

Ash had that faraway look again they guessed they would be seeing that a lot in the next few days while triggers brought things slowly back until they all finally clicked into place

When Ash snapped out of it she turned to Jill

"How's your head" she asked

"I'm fine, just a little cut" replied Jill

"And the man" asked Ash

"He's fine as well, he's recovering on the ward" replied Jill not wanting to go into too much information for now

"I could do with a drink, does anyone else want one" said Jill changing the subject

"Yes, please" replied Jonathon and Katie

"Ash" asked Jill

Ash shook her head she was aware that she had upset Jill by what she had just asked her but she didn't know why

Jill got up and made her way out she met Gordon in the corridor

"How's it going" he asked

"Is Tom with you" asked Jill trying to change the subject again because she could feel the tears coming

"No, I sent him home, so" replied Gordon

Jill started walking towards the kitchen

"She gets this faraway look and then she remembers things" said Jill

"Like what" asked Gordon

"Well when they were talking about the Tom and Katie argument, she said it sounded familiar" said Jill

"What else" asked Gordon

"Nothing" replied Jill

"Jill, I know you, what else" replied Gordon

"She asked how my head was, and about the man" replied Jill

"Sweetheart it is not your fault, plus it is good that she can remember somethings so soon" replied Gordon taking Jill in his arms, as she finally let the tears fall

Jill wiped her eyes

"Do, you want a drink" Jill asked Gordon

"Yes, please, take it in, I've just got to put these back, then I'll be right there" replied Gordon

Gordon left Jill to take the paperwork back to reception

Once Jill had made the drinks, she had made one for Ash as well if she didn't want it then someone else could drink it. She made her way back to the room she could hear laughter coming from inside, it sounded like Jonathon was telling Ash a story of what had happened at the party the other week

"Katie, could you move that please" said Jill as she came in to put the tray down

"Now I know you said no, but I made one anyway" said Jill to Ash

"Mum" said Ash as Jill was handing the others their drinks

"Yes" replied Jill turning to look at her

"I'm sorry" replied Ash

"No sweetheart, I'm sorry" replied Jill taking Ash's hand and giving it a squeeze

Before anything else could be said Gordon came in

"So, which one's mine" he asked

"That one" replied Jill pointing to a cup

"Thank you" replied Gordon taking the cup and sitting down

"Busy day" asked Ash

Gordon started explaining about his day about half way through Ash had that faraway look again

"Is that it" he asked

"Yes" replied Jill

"Then she snaps out of it" asked Gordon

"Yes, just carry on with what you were saying" replied Jill

Gordon carried on talking about his day just as he was finishing Ash snapped out of it

"Do you want your drink" asked Jill

"Yes, please" replied Ash she took the cup and then started to cry

"Sorry" she added as Jill wiped her tears away

"Hey, there is nothing to be sorry for" replied Jill

"It's going to be a bit strange, until it all comes back" added Gordon

Ash took a sip of her tea, Jonathon started telling Ash another story from the party, Ash was glad they were there, she finished her drink, Gordon and Jill could tell she was getting tired

"Right that's enough for today, let's give Ash some space" he said taking the tray of drinks

"We will all see you tomorrow" he added persuading the others to leave as well

"See you later" said Katie

"See you soon" added Jonathon

"Bye, and thank you" replied Ash

"Mum, are you coming" asked Jonathon

"No, I will see you at home, I'm going to stay a little longer" replied Jill

"Okay" replied Jonathon

Once they had left Jill turned back to Ash

"Right let's get you comfier" said Jill making Ash lay down

It wasn't long before Ash fell asleep, Jill sat there for another hour she then decided that was enough, if the nurses needed her they would phone and they could be back, she left instructions with the night shift, it was nearly half nine when she finally left, she pulled up on the drive at home exhausted all she wanted was a nice bath and to go to bed.

Gordon who had been upstairs saw her pull up and started running a bath for her, he met her in the hallway

"Alright, love, your bath is running, so go on up and I'll bring you a drink" said Gordon

"I do love you" replied Jill taking her coat off and giving Gordon a kiss then going on up

Jill was so tired she almost fell asleep in the bath it took all her energy to stay awake, when she got out and went into their bedroom she saw her drink on her bedside table and it made her smile, she picked it up and went off in search of Gordon.

Gordon was in the study, finishing off some paperwork that he should have done that afternoon

"Thank you" said Jill making him jump

"You're welcome, you should have stayed up there, I won't be much longer" replied Gordon

"Can I help with anything" asked Jill

"No, it's all done" replied Gordon tidying the pile of paperwork up and placing it in his bag for tomorrow

"Let's go to bed" he added taking Jill's hand and leading her upstairs

Jill went straight to sleep the minute her head hit the pillow and didn't wake until the alarm went off, meanwhile at the royal Ash had, had a restless night every time she closed her eyes she had flashbacks but they weren't in any sort of order and she was getting frustrated with herself.

The nurses had asked her if she wanted either of her parents but she had told them not to bother them, they looked like they hadn't slept much in the last few days, one night was not going to hurt her, she knew they would be upset so she had even asked the nurses not to mention it to them when they arrived in the morning.


	72. Chapter 72

Back at the Ormerod residence Jill and Gordon had gotten up, they had, had their breakfast and were ready to go to work, but there was still no sign of the others even getting up yet

"They have had their chance, they knew what time we would be leaving" said Gordon getting impatient

"I'll just leave them a note anyway" replied Jill scribbling a quick note and placing it on the kitchen table

"Right let's go, I want to see her before I get any patients" replied Gordon

"Ready" said Jill putting her car keys with the note

Jill and Gordon pulled up at the royal, they went through reception which was empty and Gordon placed his coat and bag in his office, they then made their way to Ash's room. They were about to enter when one of the nurse's in charge of looking after Ash stopped them

"Doctors can I have a word please"

The nurse explained about what had happened during the night and what Ash had said, then they made their way into see Ash

Ash was asleep when they first entered, they could see what the nurse had been on about when they said she had been restless, Ash was muttering and it looked like she was trying to keep something or someone away from her face

"I should have stayed" said Jill to Gordon they were both clearly worried

"I don't think it would have made a difference" replied Gordon

They looked at her notes and then took their seats

"Well, If I had already been here maybe she would have, had a better night's sleep" said Jill

"You can't be here twenty-four seven, and Ash knows that" replied Gordon

"I know but, last night was the first night" replied Jill

Before they could talk anymore Ash woke with a start

"Morning, sweetheart" said Jill

"Morning" replied Ash

"How are you" asked Gordon

"I'm fine, you" replied Ash

"We are fine, are you sure you're alright, you look a little tired" replied Jill

"I'm fine" insisted Ash

"Where are the others" asked Ash

"They will be here later, why is there something you need" replied Jill

"No, how long was I asleep" asked Ash

"A couple of days, why do you ask" replied Gordon

Before Ash could reply Lizzie came in

"Doctor, sorry to interrupt but your first patient is here" said Lizzie

"Okay, thanks Lizzie, I'll be right there" replied Gordon

"Oh, and Ash thank you for all of your help the other day" said Lizzie

"No, problem" replied Ash

"No, I mean it you were really helpful" replied Lizzie

That triggered a memory, Gordon sent Lizzie off to explain he would be a few minutes,

When Ash's flashback had finished, she looked at Gordon

"I'm sorry I wasn't helpful" said Ash

"Sorry Ash I don't know what you mean" replied Gordon feeling awkward

Ash was trying hard to try and remember it more clearly to try and explain it in greater detail for Gordon. Jill could see what was going on

"You had better be going" Jill said to Gordon

Once Gordon had left

"Ash, sweetheart, don't worry I'm sure it will come back in time" said Jill

"I just wish I could" started Ash

"I know sweetheart, I know" interrupted Jill

Just then there was a knock at the door

"Come in" said Jill

"Hello, is it alright if I come in" said Rob

Jill looked to Ash who nodded

"Yes" replied Jill

"So how is my favourite patient doing" asked Rob

"I'm fine, how are you" replied Ash, she was bored of talking about herself and fed up of everyone asking if she was okay

"I'm good, I bet your fed up of being stuck in here" replied Rob

Ash just nodded

"I'm sure you could be wheeled out to the conservatory" said Rob

"Mum" said Ash pleadingly

"I'll just go and see what I can do" said Jill, she thought it couldn't do Ash any harm to have a change of scene

Once Jill had left

"So, what's up" asked Rob

Ash didn't say anything

"Let me guess, your finding it hard to remember" added Rob

"Yeah, it's all a jumble, like today I remembered something, but it doesn't make sense to dad when I apologised to him" replied Ash

"Tell me maybe I can help" said Rob

"I told dad I was sorry for not being helpful" replied Ash

Rob thought about it for a minute

"That was in the ambulance" he stated

"Yeah, can you tell me, please" pleaded Ash

"Okay, we were in the ambulance on the way here, he was asking you were it hurt, you said all over, that's when sister Brigid said you weren't being very helpful" said Rob

"I remember" interrupted Ash

"Yeah" said Rob

"Yeah, you then tried to pop a mask on me, dad told me I had to keep it on and Sister told me I wasn't being helpful and then the doors opened and mum was there" replied Ash excited

"Yes, that's right" said Rob

Just then Jill came back with wheelchair

"Well I had better be going, do you need a hand" said Rob

"No, we'll be fine" replied Jill

"Thank you" said Ash

"That's alright, maybe I'll see you later" replied Rob

"Right are you ready to give standing ago" said Jill

Ash nodded


	73. Chapter 73

"Right don't expect too much, and remember to lean on me" said Jill

Ash pulled the covers away and then pulled her legs up and around she was now sat upright, she tentatively put her feet on to the cool floor

"Right, sweetheart take your time" said Jill putting her hands out

Ash took Jill's hand

"Right, put your hands further up more towards my elbow" said Jill

Ash did as she was told

"That's right, now when you're ready" said Jill

Ash nodded, she then tested putting weight on her legs one at a time and then stood up

"Right, we will take it at your pace, and we are not going to push it" said Jill

"Okay" replied Ash

Ash took the few steps to the wheelchair and sat in it

"You did it, baby girl" said Jill beaming

"Mum" said Ash

"I, know" replied Jill placing a blanket over her legs, they had their books and they were just about to make their way out when there was another knock at the door

"You are miss popular today" said Jill

"Come in" said Ash

"Hello, I'm not interrupting anything am I" asked Matron

"No, we're just going to the conservatory, why don't you join us" said Ash

"I'm sure she's busy" said Jill, knowing Matron had been there a lot lately and she was behind with some of the paperwork she had asked for

"I could spare half an hour or so" replied Matron

"Well, I will get you settle and then get us some drinks" said Jill starting to wheel Ash along

They walked to the conservatory in silence, once Jill had gotten Ash settled she went off to make some drinks

"So how are you" asked Matron

"Fed up" said Ash truthfully

"It will take time" replied Matron

"I know, everyone keeps telling me but it doesn't make it any easier" replied Ash

"I promise it does get easier" replied Matron

Just then Jill came back with the drinks, she handed them their drinks and then sat down next to Ash

"Right let me know when you've had enough and want to go back" said Jill picking up her book

"Okay" replied Ash

Ash was quite happy just staring out of the window

"So, have you heard from Sister Brigid" asked Matron

"No, we haven't, have you seen her" asked Ash

"No, I thought she would have been in touch" said Matron

"She said she would be back at the weekend, and we haven't heard from her since" said Jill looking up from her book

"Where is the note" asked Ash before any more could be said

"What note" asked Matron but Jill already knew

"Ash, sweetheart" started Jill

"You, read it didn't you" said Ash

Jill nodded

"What did it say" said Ash before Jill had, had a chance to explain

Ash was not upset or angry that they had read the note in fact it was easier, she would have told them what was in it anyway and she would have had to have seen the upset on her parent's faces

"Look, we were worried, you were trapped and we couldn't get hold of her, the note was the only thing we had to go on" started Jill

"I don't care that you read it, really, you probably did me a favour, what did it say" replied Ash

"It was basically that she was going away to help some new nuns and she wanted you to go with her" said Jill

"I would never have gone" replied Ash getting upset

"Sweetheart we know" said Jill putting her book down and taking Ash's hand

"Did you find her" asked Ash

"Yes, we got there just in time, she helped find you" said Matron

"Of course, you did, she was in the ambulance" replied Ash

"You remember that" asked Jill

"Yes, it came back when I was talking to Rob, she was the one that said I wasn't being helpful, when dad asked me where it hurt" replied Ash

"That's what you were trying to apologise for" asked Jill

Ash nodded

"Sweetheart, you can talk to me" said Jill squeezing her hand

"I know, so where is she, why haven't I seen her" asked Ash

Jill looked at her and Ash could tell what she was trying to find the words to say

"She still went" said Ash getting angry

"Yes, she said it was too late to find someone else" said Matron

"No, it was more important to her, she finally made her choice" replied Ash

"Ash, it's not quite like that" said Jill trying to keep her calm

"No, well how come everyone else, managed to change their plans" replied Ash

"It's not like that" tried Jill

"Well it looks like it to me, that was more important than staying with me" said Ash

"Ash, it's not that easy, there were things going on while you were in surgery" said Jill

"What things" asked Ash

Before anything else could be said Jonathon, Tom and Katie joined them

"Good to see you out of bed, lazy bones" said Jonathon jokingly

"Right, I had better be getting on, I will see you later" said Matron getting up

Everyone said bye

Ash just kept looking at Jill

"Did we interrupt something" asked Katie feeling the tension

"No" said Jill

"Yes" said Ash at the same time

"We could always come back later" said Katie

"No, stay, we can talk about this later" said Jill happy for the interruption

Before anything else could be said they were interrupted again

"Sorry, doctor there's an emergency, doctor Ormerod asked if I could get you" said the nurse

"Okay, I'll be right there" said Jill

"Right, let's get you back to your room" said Jill

"No, I want to stay here" replied Ash

"No, what if you get tired" replied Jill

"I will tell Katie, and she can take me back" said Ash defiantly

"It's fine mum, we will look after her" said Tom

"I know you will" replied Jill clearly worried

"Right well take it easy" said Jill putting one hand on Ash's head

"Okay" said Ash

"Sweetheart, don't be like that, I promise I will tell you everything later" said Jill

Ash didn't reply, Jill knew she needed time to come to terms with everything she had learned so far, this morning

"I'll be back as soon as I can" said Jill as she left the room

Jill made her way down to casualty it was already full of people, which was a good thing otherwise she would have been brooding what had just gone on.

Meanwhile back in the conservatory Ash just wanted to be on her own but she knew the others wouldn't leave her

"So, what was that all about" asked Tom

"Nothing" replied Ash

"Well it didn't look like nothing" replied Tom

"Just drop it, you're just like them" replied Ash

"Am not" replied Tom

"Hey Tom, why don't we go and make some drinks" said Jonathon trying to stop an argument from happening

"Hey that's a good idea, and maybe bring a game as well" added Katie

The Boy's left them

"Thanks" said Ash

"Hey no problem, you're right about one thing, but he's worse than them" replied Katie with a giggle

Ash laughed too

"Yeah, I forgot you two had fallen out because he had to know everything" replied Ash

"Do you want to talk" asked Katie

"No, you'll alright mum said she'll explain everything anyway" replied Ash just as the Jonathon came back

"This is all I could find" said Jonathon holding up a rather battered looking box of snakes and ladders

"Where's Tom" asked Ash

"He'll be back in a bit" replied Jonathon

"He's sulking isn't he" replied Katie

Jonathon nodded

"He's so pathetic, I would have thought he would have learnt from last time" added Katie

"Hey, at least it's one less person for me to beat" said Ash trying to put a positive spin on it

"Who, said you are going to win" replied Jonathon setting up the board

They had been sat there playing for half an hour

"Right, I'm going to make us those drinks" said Katie after she had lost for the third time in a row

"Are you scared you'll lose again" asked Jonathon

"No" replied Katie

"I could really do with a drink" said Ash

"See, set it up I'll be back in a minute" added Katie

Katie got up and left

"So how are Mum and Dad, really" asked Ash

"They're okay, worried I guess about how you are" replied Jonathon

Ash and Jonathon had always had a close relationship, probably because they were close in age and because they both were really, protective of their parents

"What about me" asked Ash

"Well, we were all really worried about whether you would walk and what you would remember and then there was" started Jonathon but he stopped as they heard someone walking past once they had gone

"What" asked Ash

"Well there was all that trouble with sister, and how you would cope with her having gone" said Jonathon

Before anymore could be said Katie came back in with the drinks

"So are you ready to lose" said Katie as she handed Jonathon his drink

"If you are" replied Jonathon

"Thanks" said Ash as she took her drink, but she was looking at Jonathon as she said it so he would know it was meant for him as well, he nodded

"Right, shall we be nice and let the loser go first" said Jonathon jokingly

"Yeah, it's only right to give her a chance" replied Ash

"Hey, you're lucky, I can't do this to you as well" replied Katie getting up and playfully hitting Jonathon on the arm

"That's not fair, for that you can miss a go" replied Jonathon

Ash was sat there laughing at them, they were glad to see her a little happier

It was another hour before Jill came along


	74. Chapter 74

"Where's Tom" asked Jill

"He went off" said Katie

"What happened this time" asked Jill expecting it to be between Tom and Katie

"It was me, sorry" said Ash

"What have you done now" said Jill as she sat down, she didn't mean for it to sound as harsh as it did but she was feeling really, tired

"Nothing" replied Ash defensively

"Katie, can you take me back now, I've had enough" said Ash

When Katie didn't move

"Please" pleaded Ash trying her best not to cry

"Yes, of course" said Katie, quickly getting up and wheeling Ash out

"Mum, what is it what aren't you telling us" asked Jonathon

"Nothing, why do you ask" replied Jill

"Well, you've just bitten Ash's head off for nothing" replied Jonathon

"I'm just tired, and worried about telling her, was I really that bad" asked Jill

"No, she'll come a round, so what do you have to tell her" asked Jonathon

"Nothing, it's not important, why has Tom stormed off" asked Jill

Jonathon knew he would not get the answers he wanted so told Jill the whole story of what happened after she had left, including the words he and Tom had, had when they had walked off to get drinks

Jill got up

"Where are, we going" asked Jonathon

"It looks like I have an apology to make, then I need to talk to Dad and we need to have a little chat with someone" replied Jill

They walked into Ash's room, where Gordon and the Doctor were already deep in conversation with Ash, they took their seats and listened in

"All your results seem fine" continued the doctor

"So, when can I go home" asked Ash

All she wanted was to be at home in her own room with her own stuff and to have a little space again, she felt a little over crowded and being constantly watched wasn't helping with her memory

"Well you need to be able to do the stairs unaided, but once you have done that, I see no reason why you can't go home" replied the doctor

"Can I give it a go now then, please" asked Ash

"Ash" started Jill but she knew by the look Ash flashed her that she would not listen to her right now

"I don't see why not" replied the doctor

"Dad, can you come" asked Ash

"Yes, and Mum" replied Gordon he would not have missed this for the world

Ash, nodded she got up and slowly made her way to the door, this was the furthest she had walked for a few days but surprisingly, she didn't feel that bad,

The doctor was explaining to Ash on the way to the stairs what she would need to do

"What I need you to do is use the handrail on the side it would be at home" said the doctor

"Okay, how many times" asked Ash

"Just once, up and back down" replied the doctor

"Just take your time" added Jill as they reached the stairs

Ash put her hand on the rail and froze, she was having a flashback of the accident, Gordon put his hand on her shoulder which made her jump

"It's alright, sweetheart, you don't have to do it" said Gordon

"Yes, just walking all the way here was a big achievement" added Jill

"It's fine" replied Ash, she then put her foot on the first step and swiftly made her way up

"Right take your time coming, back down, it's going to be harder as you will have to use your right arm to grip the handrail" said Gordon

Ash nodded and did as she was told, she crossed her right arm in front of herself so she could hold the rail, she then slowly started to descend she stopped a few steps down as she remembered something else

"Ash, what is it do you need help" asked Gordon

Ash didn't answer

"Ash, honey, I'm coming to help you" said Jill clearly worried, just as Jill stepped onto the first step, Ash came around, she stumbled, but managed to regain her balance

"This wasn't such a good idea, give me your hand" said Jill

"No, I can do this" said Ash defiantly, she didn't let go of the handrail and carried on to the bottom of the stairs

"What happened" asked Gordon

"Can we talk about it later" asked Ash

"We would, like to know now" replied Gordon sternly

"I had a couple of flash backs, but it's the first time I've been on the stairs since" replied Ash tears starting to form

"It's alright, sshhhh" said Jill taking her into her arms, Ash let out a sob

"Sshhh" said Jill again trying to sooth her while gently rubbing her back

"Well I'm happy to discharge you" said the doctor, feeling slightly awkward

"Thank you" said Ash in between sobs

"Right, let's go back and tell the others" said Gordon

They walked back in silence

"Don't worry you can try again tomorrow" said Katie, seeing Ash had been crying and worried looks on their parent's faces

"No, she won't, she managed it" said Jill

"So, why the long face is it Tom" asked Jonathon

Ash shook her head

"What, about Tom" asked Gordon

"Ash, I'm sorry I snapped, I'm just tired" said Jill to Ash

"It's okay" replied Ash sitting down

"We had better, go and have a little chat" said Jill to Gordon

"Right, we won't be long, can you help your sister pack, and then we can go" said Jill as she and Gordon were leaving the room

"So, what happened why the tears" asked Katie

"I'd rather not talk about it" said Ash reaching for her bag

"What are you going to wear" asked Jonathon helping to empty the cupboard

"The clothes I came in with I suppose" said Ash

The other two looked at each other

"What" asked Ash

"They had to be thrown away, after the accident, they had to cut them off you" said Katie nervously

"Okay, well maybe Mum's brought something" said Ash optimistically

"I'll go and check" said Katie


	75. Chapter 75

Meanwhile Gordon and Jill had, had their little chat about what had happened she had even mentioned that they would have to tell Ash what happened with sister, while she was asleep, they then went off in search of Tom, they found him in Gordons office

Katie was making her way down to reception when she could hear Tom kicking off

"That's right, believe your precious daughter, of course she can't do anything wrong" shouted Tom

"That is not, what we are saying" said Gordon getting short tempered

"Actually, she was willing to take the blame, I got short tempered with her" said Jill

"I bet it was Katie sticking her nose in" said Tom

"Look, what we are saying is you don't want them knowing everything, therefore you cannot expect to know everything either" said Jill trying to calm the situation

"So, what did she say" asked Tom

"What have we just said" replied Gordon

Before he could reply there was a knock at the door

"Come in" said Gordon

"What's wrong" said Jill before Katie had even stepped in the room

"Nothing, we just wondered, if you had any clothes for Ash" said Katie not daring to look at Tom

"What did you say" interrupted Tom

"No, but I'll see what I can do, when we've finished here" replied Jill getting up and ushering Katie out the door

"Do you, want me to pop back home" asked Katie trying to be helpful

"That's a lovely idea, thank you" said Jill shutting the door behind them

"What should I bring" asked Katie

"Jeans, a t-shirt and maybe a jumper but nothing with tight sleeves otherwise she won't get it over her cast" replied Jill

"I won't be long, is there anything else" asked Katie

"No, I think that's all, and Katie be careful" replied Jill

Jill watched Katie leave and then took a deep breath and was about to go back in

"So, doctor is it true Ash is leaving" asked Lizzie

"Yes, lizzie it is" replied Jill

"Is it not a bit early, I mean the other one hasn't even been discharged yet" replied Lizzie

"Yes, I mean no it's not too early, and it's not for us to discuss this" replied Jill

"Yes doctor, sorry doctor" replied Lizzie

"Sorry, Lizzie, it's been a long trying day" replied Jill going back into the office

"Of course, you would believe them" said Tom

"It's not like that" replied Gordon getting angry

"So, why don't you tell us what happened" asked Jill taking her seat again

"What's the point" replied Tom sulkily

"So, we can hear your side of the argument" replied Jill

"And we can sort this out before we all go home" added Gordon

"Well, after you left, I asked Ash what you had been talking about, she said it was none of my business, and I said maybe we could help" replied Tom

"What else" replied Jill knowing he was trying to make himself look like the innocent one in all of this

Tom stayed silent for a couple of seconds

"She said I was just like you two" said Tom, hoping to see the hurt on their faces but their expressions didn't change

"I'm telling the truth" said Tom

"We, know you are" replied Gordon

"So, why aren't you upset" asked Tom

"We, are but we have talked about this, and that is how she feels at the moment, we can't make her change her mind" replied Jill

"But" started Tom

"No buts, we have been keeping things from her, not just for her own good, but because we can't face telling her" said Jill

"Plus, we know she will tell us in her own time" replied Gordon

"But what if she doesn't" replied Tom

"Then that is her decision, and whether we like it or not, we must respect it, like we do for all of you" replied Jill

"Anyway, we are getting off subject, so what else happened" said Gordon

"Nothing" lied Tom

"Tom" said Gordon sternly

"So, it was Jonathon" replied Tom

"It doesn't matter who it was, just tell us the truth" replied Jill

"Jonathon and I left, to get drinks, and I didn't go back" said Tom

"Why not" asked Jill

"Because Jonathon told me not to" replied Tom still trying to skirt around the truth

"Why, was that" asked Gordon

"Because I may, have said some things" replied Tom

"But I didn't really mean them, I was just angry" added Tom

"Well, apologise to Jonathon and we'll take it from there" said Jill

"I'm sorry" said Tom

"Well, you'll lucky that Ash didn't hear it, but if you ever say anything like that again" replied Gordon

"I, know, I'm really sorry" replied Tom

Meanwhile back with Ash and Jonathon

They had packed the bag, there wasn't that much to pack because no-one thought she would be leaving yet

"So, what was that all about" asked Jonathon

"I'd rather not talk about it" replied Ash

"I know but you know mum and dad are going to ask" replied Jonathon

"I know, I hope they are willing to wait until I feel ready, besides, mum has things to tell me first" replied Ash

"What stuff" asked Jonathon

"She said something happened and she would tell me later" replied Ash telling him all she knew

"Ohhh, is it to do with me" asked Jonathon with a smile

Ash didn't answer

"Or Katie" asked Jonathon, Ash still didn't answer

"Dad" queried Jonathon

"I'm not telling" replied Ash getting fed up

"Will you tell me, when you find out" asked Jonathon

"You, probably already know" replied Ash

Jonathon was quietly thinking about what had happened that Ash wouldn't know about

"I can't think of anything that happened, between the two of them" said Jonathon

"What, makes you think it was them" replied Ash

"Ohhh, this is killing me" replied Jonathon

"How, do you think I feel, mum would have told me by now, if you lot hadn't turned up" replied Ash

"Katie's, been a long time, I hope every thing's alright" added Ash, trying to change the subject

"Yeah, probably got pulled into the whole Tom thing" replied Jonathon

"Shall, we play a game" he added

"Yeah, okay" replied Ash

They were both bored of waiting, they had played a couple of games

"How much longer, do you reckon they will be" asked Ash

"They can't be too much longer, surely" replied Jonathon

"I'll tell you what, I'll go and see if I can find out" added Jonathon

Ash started to pack the game away, while Jonathon got up and was making his way towards the door when it opened

"Where's mum and dad" asked Katie as she walked in the room with a bag

"We thought you were with them" replied Jonathon

"No, I went home for these" replied Katie

"Thanks" said Ash taking the bag

"I'll just go and see if I can find them" said Jonathon

"Okay" replied Katie


	76. Chapter 76

Jonathon left, while he was gone Ash got changed, she need Katie's help to button up the jeans

"Yeah sorry, didn't really think about that" said Katie

"It's fine really, it's better than going home in my pyjamas" replied Ash

There was a knock at the door

"Come in" said Katie

"Ash here is your prescription, is there anything else you need before you go" asked the Doctor

"No, thank you" replied Ash

"Okay, well take care and see you soon" replied the Doctor, leaving

A few minutes' past before Jonathon came back

"Dad said, he won't be long he had a couple of things to do before we could leave" stated Jonathon

"Okay, well give me that and I'll go and get it made up" said Katie

"Thanks" said Ash handing over the piece of paper

Katie took it and left, she met Jill in the corridor and told her what she was doing

"Right, are we ready" asked Jill entering and checking the room for anything that had been left behind

"Yes" replied Ash apprehensively

"What's wrong" asked Jill sitting down next to her on the bed

"Nothing" lied Ash

"Is it Tom" asked Jonathon

"No" replied Ash, quickly

"Jonathon, can you go and get my things from my office, please" said Jill

"Okay" replied Jonathon

Once Jonathon had left

"So, what's wrong" asked Jill

"It's nothing" started Ash, she looked at Jill

"I'm scared of what I might remember" she added

"Why, now" asked Jill

Before anymore could be said Gordon followed by Matron and the others came in

"Right, are we ready" asked Gordon

"You, go on, we'll be right behind you" replied Jill

Matron stayed and said her goodbyes and then also left them to it

"Actually, wait here one second" said Jill as she got up and left

"Matron, sorry" said Jill

"Yes" said Matron, stopping and turning around

"What are you up to this Sunday" asked Jill

"Nothing" replied Matron

"Would you mind, coming around on Sunday it's just" started Jill

"What time" asked Matron

"Well she is getting there about twelve so about half eleven" replied Jill

"Perfect, see you then" replied Matron turning back around

Jill now thought about what Ash had said and she walked back in the room

"It's because of what you remembered earlier on isn't it" said Jill

Ash nodded

"It's alright, nothing bad is going to happen, I promise" replied Jill

"I, know" replied Ash

"Come on then, we better not keep your father waiting any longer" replied Jill

They both left the room, Ash following Jill, it started to bring something back which had been a little unclear. They were outside and the memories were flooding back, she remembered she was in pain and that Jill was taking her home, she then remembered getting in the car and that they turned right out of the royal, as Jill had to see a patient on the way home quickly. That they pulled up outside and that she pulled her legs up to get comfy, and she had pulled her book out, it had been the first chance she had, had to read it all day

"Ash" said Gordon while she was remembering all of this, see that she had gone rather pale, this made Jill turn and look at her

"Sweetheart, it's alright" said Jill putting an arm around her because she thought she was looking a little unstable

Gordon made his way towards them as Ash had stopped dead

"Right you three go on in my car" said Jill

"Is she alright" asked Jonathon

"Yes, she's fine go on, we'll be right behind you" replied Gordon

"Mum" said Katie

"Yes, go on" said Jill

"Can I stay" asked Jonathon

Not wanting to waste any more time and thinking maybe Tom and Jonathon being left alone was probably not such a good idea at the moment Gordon nodded. The other two got into the car and were pulling away when Ash started to get some colour back

"Ash, are you alright" asked Gordon

"I'm fine" replied Ash

"Well, let's get you home" said Jill

Both of them wanted to make this all go away as if it had never happened, but they knew the next best thing was to let her come to them when she was ready to talk, they all got into the car

"Are you sure, you don't want to drop me off and then send Katie to pick me up" asked Gordon driving off

"What are you talking about" asked Ash

"Mum was going to take you home and Dad was going to go shopping" Whispered Jonathon back

"It's not important" replied Gordon

Ash was about to say something, but Jill got there first

"One of us was going to do a food shop, but like Dad said it's nothing important" said Jill

"Why don't we go now" replied Ash

"I don't think that's such a good idea" replied Jill

"Please, if I get tired I can go and sit in the car" pleaded Ash

"I don't know, what do you think" said Jill

"I don't see why not" replied Gordon

"Yes" said Ash

"Don't go getting any ideas, if it's not on the list it's not going in the trolley" said Gordon

"Where's the list" replied Ash cheekily

"In my pocket, where it is going to stay" replied Gordon jokingly, tapping his pocket

It was starting to drizzle

"I'll drop you off at the front and then go and park" said Gordon

"Okay, Ash, Jonathon what are you going to do" asked Jill

"I'm going with you" replied Ash

"So am I" added Jonathon

Gordon pulled up

"Right see you in a minute and here's the list, guard it with your life" said Gordon jokingly to Jill

"Well, you had better be quick, you know how much of a soft touch I am" replied Jill

"Take all the time you need" added Ash jokingly

Jill shut the door and then took Ash's arm as they walked into the store, while Jonathon went and got a trolley. Gordon quickly found a space and made his way in the drizzle was now turning into a down pour.

Gordon entered the store he saw Jill talking to one of their patients, but he couldn't see Ash or Jonathon. He wandered down the next couple of aisles and found them looking at the tins

"So, how's it going" he asked

"Mum's talking" started Jonathon

"I know I've just seen her" replied Gordon, Ash handed the list over

"let's have a look then" said Gordon looking down the list

"Right, Ash two tins of beans" said Gordon

"Yes" replied Ash taking one and passing it to Jonathon before taking a second, then Jonathon placed them in the trolley, they carried on taking what Gordon told them and placing it in the trolley while Gordon pushed it along

They had nearly finished when Jill found them

"So, how's it going" asked Jill

"Nearly done" replied Gordon

"Ash, can you get some milk please" said Gordon

"And Ash" asked Jill as she walked off

"She seems fine" replied Gordon

"Good" replied Jill

Ash came back with the milk

"Right looks like that's it" said Gordon just double checking the list

They queued and paid it didn't take very long thankfully it was quiet, the rain was still coming down hard when they went outside, Jill and Ash sat in the car while Gordon and Jonathon put the bags in the boot

"So how are you feeling" asked Jill

"I'm okay, you" replied Ash

"I'm okay, to be honest a little tired and worried" replied Jill hoping that being honest it might help Ash to open up to her about what was going on with her

Before anything else could be said Jonathon got in the car, so Ash leaned forward and squeezed Jill's shoulder, Jill tapped her hand

"So, what's for dinner" asked Jonathon as he did his seat belt up

Ash giggled

"What" asked Jonathon, thinking he had missed something

"I don't know yet" replied Jill

Gordon got into the car

"Right are we ready to go" he asked starting the car and putting his seat belt on he didn't wait for a reply he reversed out of the bay

They drove the short distance home in silence,


	77. Chapter 77

When they pulled up outside, Jill was the first one out of the car so she went to open the front door but Katie opened it before she got there

"What happened, what's wrong" asked Katie

"Nothing, we decided to get the shopping done, sorry" replied Jill, rubbing Katie's arm

Just then Ash joined them after Gordon had told her she couldn't help

"Alright, sweetheart" asked Jill

Ash nodded and made her way in, she was struggling to undo her shoes

"Hold on I'll help you" said Jill

"No, I'm fine I can do it myself" replied Ash

"Sweetheart" replied Jill, bending down and helping anyway

"Sorry" said Ash giving up and letting Jill help

"Look, it's been a long day, you've done a lot" replied Jill getting up and holding her hand out

"Thanks" replied Ash taking her hand and getting up

"Right go and sit in there, I'm just going to help dad to put the shopping away" said Jill

"Do you mind if I just go up and lay down for a bit" asked Ash

"Of course, not, just one thing we don't want you using the stairs on your own for a bit" replied Jill, clearly worried how she would react and that she might have a repeat of what happened earlier

"Okay, can you watch me, please" replied Ash

"Yes, of course" replied Jill slipping her shoes off

Jill followed Ash upstairs, she was slower than when she was in the hospital but she had done a lot since then. Jill saw her into her room and made sure she was comfy and had everything she needed before going back downstairs

"Everything alright" asked Gordon as Jill entered the kitchen

"Yes, she was tired so she's gone for a lie down, I've told her about using the stairs" replied Jill

"I bet that didn't go down well" replied Gordon

"Actually, she took it surprisingly well" replied Jill picking up a bag and starting to unpack it

They packed the rest of the shopping away after they had finished Gordon persuaded Jill to go and relax while he made dinner

"Well, if you're sure, I might just go and check on her" said Jill

"Yes, I'm sure" replied Gordon

"Can I help with anything" asked Jonathon from the kitchen doorway

"Yes, you can help me by making a start on these" said Gordon handing some vegetables over for Jonathon to start peeling

Jill left them to it and went upstairs, while Gordon and Jonathon worked in silence for a few minutes

"Dad, is everything alright between you two" asked Jonathon

"Yes of course it is, why do you ask" asked Gordon

"It's just something Ash said" replied Jonathon

"What did Ash say" asked Gordon

"That mum needed to talk to her about what happened, while she was asleep" replied Jonathon

"Yes, nothing to do with mum and me" replied Gordon

"What then" asked Jonathon, even more confused now

"With what happened with sister" replied Gordon

"Why's mum worried about that" asked Jonathon

"Well, it's hard to explain, mum's worried Ash will blame her" replied Gordon

"But we were all there, we all saw what happened" replied Jonathon

"I know, that's enough for now, can you hand me a pan please" replied Gordon, ending the subject

Jill hadn't gone straight in to Ash she had gone to her room to tidy up, they had left in a rush that morning, she was nearly done when she heard noises coming from Ash's room. She put the clothes down and rushed to Ash's room

Ash was asleep and was muttering to herself, Jill was going to leave her

"Mum" said Ash

Jill turned back around and was going to leave her thinking she had miss heard

"Mum" said Ash for a second time

Jill pulled the chair up and sat in it

Ash was quiet for a minute

"Mum" said Ash

Before Jill could say anything

"Mum, please wake up" whispered Ash

Jill couldn't believe what she was hearing, she reached out and stroked Ash's face

"It's alright, baby" whispered Jill

Ash quietened down and had been fairly peaceful, she had muttered a few things under her breath that Jill couldn't quite make out

"Mum" said Katie from the doorway

"Yes" replied Jill a little startled she had been concentrating on trying to figure out what Ash was saying she hadn't even heard Katie coming up the stairs

"Dad, was wondering if you were able to talk to him for a minute" replied Katie

Jill looked at Ash, who had gone completely quiet and seemed peaceful enough

"Yes, tell him I'll be right down" replied Jill

Katie nodded and went back downstairs

"I'm so sorry, this is all my fault" whispered Jill to Ash, Jill then got up and went back through to her room she picked up the dirty clothes she had dumped down, she then made her way down stopping in Ash's bedroom doorway to check she was still fine

Jill entered the kitchen

"Sit down, can I get you a drink" said Gordon

"Yes, please a cup of tea would be lovely" replied Jill putting a load of washing on

"How is she" asked Gordon filling the kettle up

"She's asleep" replied Jill not going into too much information as the others had joined them

"So, what's this all about" asked Jill sitting at the table

"Well I thought it would be a good idea to go through what happened with sister, so we've got it clear in our own minds, before we talk to Ash tomorrow" replied Gordon

They had been sat there for nearly half an hour telling their part of what happened it was the first-time Jill had heard what had been said once she had left the room

Now that it was all sorted

"Right, kids can you leave us for a minute" asked Gordon

They got up and left

"Don't go too far, dinner will be ready in about five minutes" added Gordon

"Okay" they all replied

"What's wrong" asked Gordon checking on the pans

Jill went to say something

Meanwhile upstairs Ash was starting to remember coming around in the pitch black after the accident and coughed

Back downstairs

"What was that" asked Jill hearing the cough

"What" asked Gordon

"Did you not hear that" asked Jill, straining to hear the smallest whisper

"Dad" mumbled Ash

"That" asked Jill hearing a noise but not able to work out what it was

That time Gordon heard it they walked into the hallway they were just about to go back into the kitchen thinking they had just heard the other three talking

"Dad" said Ash a little louder and clearer like she had on that day

"Ash" said Jill and Gordon at the same time looking at each other

"I think she's having flashbacks" said Jill as they made their way quickly upstairs

"Ash, sweetheart, it's alright" said Gordon as he went in her room first

"We're here, sweetheart" added Jill as she followed him in

Ash woke up at the sound of them coming in

"Dad, Mum" said Ash starting to cry

"It's alright, everything's okay" soothed Jill

Ash was sat bolt upright in bed

"It was so horrible" replied Ash

"I know" said Jill sitting down and giving Ash a cuddle

"It's over now, it can't hurt you anymore, but we're here if you need to talk" added Gordon taking Ash's hand

Ash nodded

"Right, Dinners ready, are you up to coming down" asked Gordon

"Yeah, I'll just wash my face first" replied Ash

"I'll go down and start plating up" said Gordon getting up

Ash and Jill followed him out, Ash went through to the bathroom

"Gordon" said Jill

Gordon turned around to face Jill, he could read her expression without her having to say anything he could tell she was worried

"It's going to be fine, I promise" he said, giving her a peck on the cheek


	78. Chapter 78

Jill wished with all her heart he was right, she watched him go downstairs and then waited for Ash to finish in the bathroom

"Better" she asked as Ash joined her

Ash nodded although she wasn't so sure. She knew she wasn't done with the flashbacks and there was still the matter of what had happened with sister

"Right, I'll go first" said Jill

"Okay" replied Ash following Jill downstairs

"Just in time" said Gordon taking the last two plates into the dining room

"Ash, do you want a drink" asked Jonathon as she sat down next to Jill

"No thanks, I'm fine" replied Ash

They were sat there talking about their plans for next week as it was the last week the older three would be there before they went back

"Well at least we have some good stories to tell everyone" said Jonathon jokingly to Ash

"Mum" said Ash trying to get Jill's attention

"Jonathon" said Jill, thinking that he had upset Ash, by what he had just said

"Mum" said Ash again

"Yes, sweetheart" replied Jill looking at her

"Could you" started Ash

"Yes, of course" replied Jill, noticing Ash had been struggling to cut her food

"There you go" said Jill once she had cut the chicken and potatoes into manageable size pieces

"Thank you" replied Ash

Both Jill and Gordon made mental notes to cut her food until Ash's cast came off

They carried on with their conversations, but Ash started to become withdrawn she was thinking about what she had been remembering

Jill and Gordon noticed this and once they had all finished they sent the older three into the kitchen to do the washing up and making the drinks

"Ash, sweetheart we need to talk" said Jill

"Okay" replied Ash

"Let's go through to the front room" said Gordon

The three of them went through

"So, you remember me telling you, things happened" said Jill nervously

"Yeah" replied Ash

"Were do we start" Jill asked Gordon

"Start from when we got to the royal" said Gordon

"I've remembered some of that" replied Ash

"Okay, do you want to tell us what you can remember" asked Jill, trying to put off telling Ash what had happened

"I remember being in the ambulance, dad was looking after me asking where I was in pain, I told him everywhere, auntie said I wasn't being helpful, rob started talking to me, then the doors open and you were there, then it kind of goes hazy, I'm sorry" said Ash

"Ash, you have nothing to be sorry for" replied Gordon

"I should have been more helpful" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, with the injuries you had, you would have been in a lot of pain, it is not your fault" replied Gordon

"So, your turn" said Ash

The others came in with drinks

"So, what are we talking about" asked Tom

"Do, you need some space" asked Katie

"Actually, that would be good" replied Gordon

"Okay, we'll be back later then" replied Jonathon

"Don't be too late" replied Jill

They got up and left

"So, where, were we" said Gordon

"You were about to tell me what happened" replied Ash

"Well, we realised shortly after getting you into casualty that you had a brain injury" said Jill

"How" asked Ash, intrigued

"Well, you kept trying to fight us, by taking your oxygen mask off" replied Jill

"Sorry" replied Ash

"So, we were waiting for the other doctors, but knew we could wait no longer, so we sent, the others out the room" replied Gordon

"Dad, placed you into an induced coma, to prevent any more injuries" added Jill

"We got you settled and ran some tests, when you went into theatre, we went and found the others to let them know" added Gordon

"Everyone was really worried, and said somethings they wouldn't have if they weren't so scared" added Jill trying to explain to Ash

"What happened" asked Ash

"We walked in, said you had gone to theatre, then sister said something to Mum, that made her upset" replied Gordon

"What" asked Ash

"She said, if anything happened to you, she would never forgive me" said Jill

Ash didn't say anything but she was so mad, but she also knew there was more to come and thought while they were being open and honest with her she would make the most of it

"Mum, left really upset and we told her some truths, Jonathon said as if you can talk, Katie told her to leave us alone, and I told her as if Jill would knowingly put you in danger" added Gordon

"That doesn't explain why she still left" replied Ash

"Well, we all waited in different places, we needed some space to clear our heads" said Gordon

They thought it best to leave out what happened in the garden

"Well it was sometime later and we were allowed to sit by your bed, we were talking amongst ourselves, sister came in and apologised" said Jill

"We asked her to stay, she only had one question" added Gordon

Ash, was fighting to keep control of her anger, she took a sip of her tea

"She wanted to know if you were on your way to meet her" added Gordon

"What" asked Ash confused

"The note, was telling us were she would be, you were supposed to meet her, she wanted to know why we had the note" replied Jill

"Ohh, yeah" replied Ash as if she had just forgotten something

"It dawned on her you were never go to go, and she said she had it all planned, that you were going to be just like her" replied Gordon

"That's when I could take no more, my head was pounding I left" said Jill ashamed

"She left her contact details with matron and the boy's, I had gone to check on mum" added Gordon

"I'm, so sorry, baby" said Jill

"I hate her, I never want to see her again" shouted Ash looking at Gordon, she stormed off, slamming the door behind her

"See, I told you she would hate me" said Jill, she had managed to keep the tears at bay until then

"Don't worry, she didn't mean it, I'll have a word with her" said Gordon giving Jill a cuddle

"She's had a lot to deal with, she's just venting a little" he added trying to console Jill


	79. Chapter 79

Ash stormed into the hallway, she had nowhere to go, she couldn't go upstairs she had promised not to go up them alone, she was weighing up her options, when she heard the others returning, they had given up on going out the rain had returned and it was coming down harder than ever

Ash quickly went into the study, not wanting to be around anyone at the moment. Jill and Gordon heard the front door

"Ashling Moria Ormerod, get back in here now" shouted Gordon

"It went well then" stated Tom, to Katie and Jonathon as they took their shoes off

Katie opened the door

"Sorry, it's just us, we came back, is everything alright" she asked, seeing Jill had been crying

"Where's Ash" asked Jill

"She's not with us" replied Jonathon

"Can you just check upstairs" asked Gordon, trying to give him and Jill a little time

Tom and Katie went upstairs, Jonathon went to check the dining room and kitchen

Gordon and Jill were left in the hallway

"She, hates me Gordon, you heard her" said Jill

"I'm sure she didn't mean it" replied Gordon

Ash was listening to every word, how could mum be blaming herself she didn't hate her, she loved her, she hated her aunt, how could they think that before Ash could call out

"She's not up here" shouted down Tom

"And she's not in there" said Jonathon returning to the hallway

"Well, she can't be far, her coats still here" said Jill

Ash got up and opened the study door

"Mum" sobbed Ash

"Baby, girl" said Jill opening her arms

Ash ran into her mum's arms

"I don't hate you, it's her I hate" sobbed Ash

"Ssshhh, it's late why don't we all go to bed" said Jill

"You, do believe me don't you" asked Ash

"Of, course" replied Gordon coaxing her towards the stairs

Ash did as she was told and went upstairs, she wasn't tired but she knew everyone else was. Jill helped her into her pyjamas and then left her reading her book, they left the door open in case she need them in the night. When she heard, their door close she went to the bathroom to do her teeth on her way back to her room she bumped into Jonathon

"Why, does mum think I would hate her" whispered Ash

"Go to Katie's room, we'll explain everything" whispered back Jonathon

Ash went to Katie's room and knocked on the door

"Come in" said Katie

"Where's Jonathon" asked Tom

"I'm here" he said appearing behind Ash

"So, tell us what they told you" said Jonathon

Ash quickly filled them in

"But, it doesn't make sense, why would mum think I hate her" added Ash while the others thought about how to put it

"Mum, went off after what sister said in the waiting room" started Katie

"We, followed her into the garden, but she was blaming herself" added Tom

"Why, she didn't do anything" asked Ash

"She thought if it wasn't for her, you would never have been there" replied Jonathon

"If she had never had you helping Lizzie, if she had never gone to see the patient, if she had never gone into the building" continued Jonathon

"Dad and Matron did their best to convince her, that she had done the right thing and that if you hadn't of been there she would still have gone in there on her own" added Tom

"She just wanted to be on her own so she went to her office, Matron had a chat with her and she seemed a bit better, then we all waited in the conservatory minus sister" added Katie

"But that still doesn't mean I would hate her it was an accident" said Ash

"Well I think mum thinks, if she had stayed instead of walking out she might have persuaded Sister to stay" replied Katie

"That never would have happened" replied Ash saying what the rest were all thinking

"Yeah, that maybe true, but it doesn't stop her" replied Jonathon

They paused for a second thinking they had heard a noise outside but it turned out it was just Tom changing position on the bed

"Is that it" asked Ash

"Yeah" replied Tom

"Well, actually" said Katie

"What" asked Ash

"Yeah, what" asked Tom

"Well, I think mum feels guilty about leaving you that night as well" replied Katie

"What, when, why" asked Ash

"Mum, wasn't feeling that well, her head was pounding, it had been a long day, we all persuaded her to go home and get some rest" replied Jonathon

"So, I know she was injured, that's what we would all want, for her to look after herself" replied Ash

"Yeah, but while they were gone, your temperature rose" replied Tom

"That's got nothing to do with them going though" replied Ash

"Yeah, well mum thinks it has, that if she had stayed it might never have happened" replied Tom

"I wasn't left alone though" replied Ash

"No, Matron, Tom and I were there" replied Jonathon

"So, why does she think it would have been different, it's not like I knew or anything" replied Ash

"Well, actually, we think you might have, there was this cool thing that Katie noticed" said Jonathon

Ash looked at Katie

"Yeah, when mum, talked to you and rubbed your cheek, your vital signs changed" said Katie

"Yeah, that's cool" replied Ash excited

"Yeah, well, mum thought you knew whether she was there or not, and no matter how much dad begged or pleaded she was not going to leave your side" replied Tom

"Well that might have been my fault as well, I told dad mum would rest better by your side than at home waiting" replied Katie

"But I still don't get how that would mean I hate her, it only shows how much she loves us" replied Ash

"Right bed all of you now" said Gordon opening the door, Jill was stood behind him

"Busted" whispered Jonathon

"Thanks, night" said Ash as she left and went back to her room

Ash went straight to her room and got into bed switching off the light and pulling the covers up over her head, she didn't want to worry her parents, but she knew she wouldn't get to sleep now, she had so much information going around in her head. She heard her parents stop outside her room, she held her breath until she heard them carry on towards their room.

She must have fallen asleep at some point but she didn't know what time exactly, she woke up to the feeling she was falling, she gasped for air not realising she had been holding her breath, she turned to look at her alarm clock, it was nearly six o'clock, she didn't want to go back to sleep and she couldn't go downstairs, so she got up and closed her door so she could put her light on and read until someone else was a wake.


	80. Chapter 80

Meanwhile, Jill and Gordon woke up before their alarm clock and were sat chatting about what they had overheard in Katie's room

"I don't think she blames you" said Gordon

"I know, I'm just worried she is forcing all the blame onto sister" replied Jill

"I will tell the others off though, I mean there was a good reason we hadn't told her everything yet" said Gordon

"Well, it's too late now, she had to know sometime" replied Jill, she was too busy thinking she had missed something to be worried about that she wasn't listening to Gordon

"What's wrong" he asked

"Nothing, did you hear that" asked Jill, she had made up hearing a sound so she didn't have to talk anymore

"No" replied Gordon

Jill put her finger to her lips

"There" she said again, this time she had heard a noise, she had in fact heard Ash closing her door

"No" replied Gordon

Jill got up and walked over to the door, she noticed Ash's door was closed and her light was on

"Its alright I think Ash is awake, I'm just going to check on her" whispered Jill to Gordon who was still in bed

"Okay" he replied picking up his book

Jill tapped lightly on Ash's door

"Come in" said Ash

"Everything alright" asked Jill

"Yeah, couldn't sleep, you" asked Ash

"I'm fine" replied Jill

"About yesterday, I'm sorry, I never meant for you to" started Ash

"Look, it's fine, I'm sorry too" replied Jill she pointed to the bed

Ash nodded, Jill made her way in and sat on the bed, she closed the door behind her

"I guess, I expected you to feel that way, because I have been blaming myself" said Jill

"Why, I know you would never put us in danger" replied Ash

"Can, we just not talk about it right now" said Jill

"Okay, so what do you want to talk about" asked Ash

"I don't know, can I just have a cuddle" replied Jill

Ash nodded and cuddled into Jill, they stayed like that for a few minutes, before Jill broke the silence

"So, why can't you sleep" asked Jill

"Well, I couldn't deal with the fact, you thought I hated you" replied Ash

Jill went to say something

"I hated the fact I had upset you and I don't know how to put it right" added Ash

Jill didn't quite know what to say so Ash carried on talking

"And then when I do get to sleep, I have flashbacks, I woke up this morning feeling like I was falling" she said happy to get it off her chest

"Why, didn't you come to get us" asked Jill

"I figured you needed the rest and besides I could hear you and dad were up" replied Ash

"So, you knew we were awake, you could have come in, we were only talking" replied Jill

"I didn't want to interrupt" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, you know" started Jill

"I know, I just wanted to give you some time alone, you haven't had much chance lately" interrupted Ash

"I don't ever want you to think like that again, you come to us where ever, whenever, you understand me" said Jill

Ash nodded

"So, is there anything else you want to talk about" asked Jill

"Can we talk downstairs, I need a drink" asked Ash, her throat was still feeling a little sore

"Yes, of course" replied Jill, letting Ash go and getting up

"Do, you think dad would want to be there" asked Ash, she thought it only fair and didn't feel up to going through it more than once

"I'm sure, he would love to be there" said Jill

"I tell you what, why don't we get you downstairs, we can put the kettle on and I'll go and talk to dad" said Jill

"Okay" replied Ash, knowing they had to talk

Ash got up and was trying to put on her dressing gown, but wasn't having much luck

"Come here" said Jill with a giggle

"Thanks" replied Ash

They had just started going down the stairs when the phone rang

"Wait here, I'll be back in one second" said Jill leaving Ash on the stairs and quickly running down the rest

"Weatherill" said Jill picking up the receiver

Gordon had made his way to the top of the stairs

"Ash" said Gordon

"Yeah" said Ash turning around

Gordon looked at Ash worried

"It's alright, mum said to wait here while she answered the phone" said Ash

"Yes, yes, we'll be right there" said Jill

"Right, let's get you the rest of the way down" said Gordon

They just reached the bottom of the stairs when Jill came off the phone

"Gordon, we're needed, sorry Ash" said Jill

"Hey, it's fine, it will keep" replied Ash as she went through to the kitchen and flicked the kettle on

"What's that about" asked Gordon as he and Jill made their way back upstairs

"I'll tell you on the way" replied Jill, quickly grabbing some clothes and going into the bathroom, Gordon did the same going into their en suite

Five minutes later and they were making their way downstairs

"Right, we're off" said Gordon

Ash was trying to open a new packet of cereal

"Okay" she replied

"Here, let me do that" said Jill taking it from her

"Do you need anything else" asked Gordon

"No, I'll be fine and the others are here if I need anything" replied Ash

"Well just call if you do" replied Jill handing back the cereal

"Okay" replied Ash pouring herself a bowl of cereal

"See you later" said Gordon

"Take it easy" added Jill

"See you later, love you" replied Ash as they went through the front door

They closed it quietly so not to wake the others, they both went in Gordon's car, so that if anything was wrong at least Katie could get Ash to them quickly

Ash was sat having her breakfast, she had made a cup of tea and had found an old newspaper lying around and was flicking through the pages

Meanwhile Jill and Gordon were on their way in

"So, what was Ash on about it would keep" asked Gordon

"She said she wanted to talk" replied Jill

"Do you think she's really ready" asked Gordon

"That's what I was going to ask you" replied Jill

"I, guess we need to see what it is she wants to talk to us about" replied Gordon

"I'm worried, that she's trying to force her memory to come back" replied Jill

That was all they had time for, they got out the car and made their way into the hospital

"Morning, doctors sorry to have called you" said Lizzie

"No, problem" replied Gordon

"Right, let's go and see where they need us" added Jill as they made their way down the corridor

"Gordon you're in theatre and Jill can you run casualty" said Matron

"Yes of course" replied Jill going through and setting casualty up with the nurse

It wasn't as bad as they had first thought, it was a three-car pileup on a local road, the first car had arrived at the hospital and were being dealt with for minor cuts and bruises, they were being keep in for observations in case of concussion, the middle car which was the worst only had one person in it and they were waiting for the fire brigade to cut him free.

The final car had four people who had just arrived at the hospital and Jill was seeing to them she had sent the driver for an x-ray as he had an expected broken leg, the other front passenger had a bad cut to her forehead which Jill was suturing, the other two just looked like bruises, but matron was making room for them all on the wards any way.

They took the driver through to the operating theatre, they had to fix his leg under anaesthetic as the x-ray showed it wasn't a clean break

Jill helped tidy up casualty while they waited for further updates

"Doctor, I've got rob on the other end he needs to talk to" said Lizzie

Jill took the call

"Doc, he doesn't look all that good, I think we need you" said Rob

"Okay, I'm on my way" replied Jill

"Lizzie, if Gordon asks, tell him where I've gone" Jill added as she went out the door

"Yes, doctor" replied Lizzie going back to reception

Jill made her way to the scene

"Doc, over here" said Rob, helping to get her past the police cordon

"Thanks, what have we got" said Jill as she walked up to Rob

Rob started to explain while Jill looked at the patient

"Right I think, we had better take him straight to Ashfordly" replied Jill

"Yes, doc, I'll let them know" replied Rob going to the ambulance to radio ahead to the hospital to let them know

Jill was doing her best to stabilise the patient

"Right we're ready to remove the roof, when you are" said the fire officer

"Okay, give me one second" replied Jill administering some more pain relief she then moved out of the way

"Right, one, two, three" said the fire officer, they then lifted the roof

They got the stretcher in behind the driver and then put the seat down so they could gently lift him out. On the way to the hospital they had to stop a couple of times, once was for Jill to put another line in and the second time was to put him on a ventilator. Once they reached the hospital Jill and Rob handed the patient over to the waiting doctors.


	81. Chapter 81

Jill got a ride back to the royal, where one of the police officers had dropped the car off for her

"So, how's Ash doing" asked Rob

"She's doing well, we took her home yesterday" replied Jill

"That's good then, how's her memory she seemed to remember quite a lot the other day" replied Rob

"We, haven't talked about it too much, what's she said" replied Jill

"Not much, she was talking about what she remembered in the ambulance, and she didn't want to upset either of you by asking to many questions" replied Rob

That was the end of the conversation they had arrived at the royal. Gordon was outside waiting

"Thanks, Rob" said Jill, getting out

"No, problem and hey don't worry, I know she really wants to talk to you both" replied Rob

"I'm sure you're right" replied Jill knowing Ash wanted to talk to them

"Are you ready to go" Jill asked Gordon

"Yes, when you are" replied Gordon

"Okay, I won't be long" replied Jill

Jill went straight into her office and filled out the paperwork as quickly as she could as she was eager to get home.

Meanwhile back at the Ormerod residence Ash was still on her own, she had eaten her breakfast and was still half flicking through the newspaper, when a picture caught her eye. She turned the page back, there was a picture of the rubble of the building site, she slowly read the article, it started continuing from yesterday's article, all the people involved have been found and are being cared for at the local hospital, there were no fatalities. The cause of the accident is still unknown.

Ash could barely take her eyes off the picture, she looked at the date,

I've got to find the other paper she said to herself, she got up and walked into the front room she looked at the coffee table and in the magazine rack where they were normally kept but they were both empty.

I bet they threw them away, not wanting to upset me, thought Ash, she was going to give up when she remembered the bin in the study being full of papers the other night

Ash went through to the study and looked in the bin and there it was. There on the front page was the same picture, only there were people searching the rubble, it took her a few minutes to realise they were looking for her, the harder she looked the more she recognised people, there was sister looking angry and near her was Rob and Gordon, it looked like they were trying to lift something together, she noticed some of the local firemen and police officers, once she had taken it all in she read the article twice, she couldn't quite believe what she was reading.

All she wanted to do was go there and see it for herself, it was something she felt she had to do maybe that was why they didn't want her to see it. She put the paper back where she had found it and went back through to the kitchen, she flicked the kettle on hoping they would be back soon, it had been nearly three hours and she really wanted to go upstairs and get changed, so they could talk

She was pouring herself a drink, when she heard the car pull up and the keys in the door, that was when she turned around and saw the paper still open on the article on the table, she quickly folded it and put it back on the chair where she had found it

Ash went back to the kettle and made them a drink as well

"Hello" said Gordon as he came in and hung his coat up

"Hi, just in time, I've just made drinks" replied Ash

"Well, it looks, like you've had a nice lazy morning" joked Gordon, seeing she was still in her pyjamas

"I haven't had much choice" replied Ash

"Are the others still not up yet" asked Jill walking into the kitchen and sitting down next to Ash

Ash shook her head

"Ash, what's wrong" asked Jill, seeing she looked upset

"Nothing, I just wanted to go up" replied Ash hoping she was able to make them believe her

"Okay, well go on up" replied Gordon, they stood at the bottom of the stairs watching her go up, they then went back into the kitchen

"I, think she's alright to use them on her own" said Gordon

"Yes, she hasn't had any repeats" replied Jill

"Well, let's give her some time, then you can tell her" replied Gordon

Jill and Gordon sat having their drinks and were chatting

Ash had gone into her room and had pulled out some clothes, she had then gone to the bathroom, she had carefully had a wash, being careful not to get her cast wet and had gotten dressed, she was brushing her teeth when there was a light tap on the door, Ash went and opened it

"How, are you doing, do you need any help" asked Jill

Ash finished brushing her teeth

"I'm good thanks" said Ash, picking up her hair brush

"Here, let me do that" said Jill

"Okay" replied Ash, knowing Jill was trying to be helpful

"let's go through to my room" said Jill going to her room

Ash followed Jill through and sat at her dressing table, Jill was enjoying brushing, Ash's hair, it reminded her of when they were younger

"So, how do you want it" asked Jill

"Just in a ponytail please" replied Ash, handing Jill her hair band

"Me and your dad have been talking, and we believe you can use the stairs on your own" said Jill, putting the band in Ash's hair

"Thanks mum" replied Ash, getting up and giving her a hug

"What's this for" asked Jill

"Everything" replied Ash


	82. Chapter 82

"Come on then, let's go and find dad" said Jill

Ash let Jill go and went downstairs

"I tell you what why don't we sit outside" said Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash

"You, go on, I'll just make some drinks" said Jill

Ash went on outside, Gordon stayed behind with Jill

"What is it" asked Gordon, seeing Jill was concerned

"I don't know, I've just got this feeling" replied Jill

"Try not to worry" replied Gordon

"I'm not, I just think something happened this morning" replied Jill

"Maybe, she's just worried with how we will react" replied Gordon

"Maybe" replied Jill, with a smile, she gave Gordon a peck on the cheek

"Why, don't you go on out, I'll bring these out in a minute" replied Gordon

Jill went on out, Gordon had that feeling as well he went through to the study and had a look, but everything seemed in exactly the same place as when they had left it last night, he then went through to the front room and dining room but nothing looked out of place in there either, he made his way back to the kitchen. He heard the others coming down the stairs, just as he finished pouring the drinks, he went into the hallway

"Good afternoon" said Gordon jokingly

"Morning" they replied

"Right, we would appreciate it, if you would give us some time alone with Ash, outside" said Gordon

"Okay" they replied

They followed Gordon into the kitchen and set about getting breakfast

"Remember to tidy up" replied Gordon, going out the door

"What's that all about" replied Katie

"I don't know" replied Tom

"He seemed really annoyed" replied Jonathon

"I told you, I heard the phone" said Katie

"Who, do you think called" replied Tom

"Sister" said Jonathon and Katie together

They sat having their breakfast, talking about what they had planned for the rest of the day

Meanwhile outside

"Mum, Dad, I'm really sorry for last night" started Ash

She took a sip of tea and continued

"I never, meant for you to think I hated you" she added

"It's alright" replied Jill

"I'm also sorry for being in Katie's room last night" replied Ash

"Well" started Gordon but stopped when Jill gave him a look

"I know, I shouldn't have been in there, but I was hoping the others would help me understand a bit better, I never meant to hurt you, I'm just finding it hard" replied Ash

"It, will get easier and we are here" replied Gordon

"I know, but I don't want to upset you more than I have to" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, if you need to talk, we are here" replied Jill

"Mum" shouted Katie from the doorway

"Yes" replied Jill

"Phone" replied Katie

"Okay, I'll be right there" replied Jill, getting up and going indoors

"Ash, what's wrong" asked Gordon

"I'm finding it hard, I feel like I've been left out and asking questions seems to upset people, I don't know how to make it better" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, that you are here, and well is enough for us, we just want you to be happy" replied Gordon

"I know, I need to talk about what I remembered, would it be easier if I talked to someone else" asked Ash

"What would be easier for you" asked Gordon

"I don't mind, I just don't want to upset either of you" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, listen you won't upset us" replied Gordon

They sat in silence for a minute

"Ash, listen to me, all we want is what is best for you" added Gordon

Ash nodded, she decided to change the subject until Jill arrived back

"So, was it a bad accident" asked Ash

"You, know we can't really talk about it" said Gordon

Ash looked disappointed and Gordon saw this

"It was a traffic accident, everyone that was taken the royal were being kept in for observation" replied Gordon

Ash knew he had told her more than he should have

"Thanks, dad" replied Ash

Gordon looked towards the house and saw Jill coming back towards them

"Don't tell mum" replied Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash

"Who, was that" asked Gordon as Jill sat down

"Mum, asking about this one" replied Jill placing a hand on Ash's head

"I'm just going to pop to the bathroom" said Ash getting up

"Okay" replied Jill

They both waited until Ash had gone inside

"Is she alright" asked Jill concerned

"She, really needs to talk, but she's worried about upsetting us" replied Gordon

"Why, would she upset us" asked Jill

"She's just finding it hard, to come to terms with things" replied Gordon

Gordon took Jill's hand

"I told her all we want is for her to be happy" added Gordon

They saw Ash coming back towards them so changed the subject

"Yes, they said they would pop around today, just after lunch" said Jill as Ash sat back down

"Who, nan and grandad" asked Ash answering her own question

"Yes" replied Gordon

"Dad, said you are worried about us, don't be" said Jill

Ash looked at them and then lowered her gaze

"Well, I've been having flashbacks are you sure you're okay to listen" said Ash

Jill and Gordon didn't say anything Jill put an arm round her while Gordon reached over the table and took her hand

"Okay, well, when we left yesterday in the car park, I remembered leaving with mum and that we went to see a patient, before going home, I remember sitting in the car waiting, trying to get comfy and getting my book out, then there was a loud bang then I remember being at a doorway but I don't remember how I got there" said Ash

"Well, maybe I can help" said Jill, looking at Gordon he nodded

"I came out of the house, you told me something had happened over the road, I asked you to go inside and ask for help, while I got my bag out of the car and went to help, you must have come out and asked for me, I was in a building that must be what you can remember" said Jill

Ash smiled at Jill, knowing that could was not very easy for her, she took a deep breath and continued

"I'm at the doorway, there was another bang and it was dusty, I shouted for you but there was no reply, I waited for what seemed like forever and tried again, then I went in, it was dark and silent, I remember calling out again, I heard a noise from upstairs, so I went up and I saw you both on the floor, I finished dealing with the man and then looked after you, you had a cut to your head and I put a neck collar on you, while we waited for the ambulance" said Ash

Ash took a sip of her drink; her throat was starting to feel sore

"Then it goes hazy, I remember falling then it goes dark, then I remember dad calling, then nothing until the ambulance" said Ash quickly she was trying so hard not to cry

"You are doing really well" said Gordon squeezing her hand

"I'm, sorry, if I hadn't taken so long to find you" sobbed Ash

"Sweetheart, it wouldn't have made any difference" said Jill also getting upset, she got up and cuddled Ash

"I thought, you were" sobbed Ash

"It's alright" said Jill, trying to sooth her and gently rubbing her back while looking at Gordon for support

Gordon got up and cuddled them both

"You, have done really well, and trust us when we say, those few seconds would have made no difference" said Gordon

"Dad, phone" shouted Tom

Gordon went to go inside

"We are very proud of you" said Gordon

Gordon went in, it was the royal they needed him to go in and look at a patient, he put the phone down and went and told Jill and then left

Jill and Ash were still outside when the others asked if they could join them, Jill nodded


	83. Chapter 83

Twenty minutes later

"Right, I'm going to go and make us some lunch" said Jill, getting up

Jill went inside, she stood at the sink watching the kids, that was when she let the tears fall, she had kept strong in front of Ash, but she needed to let it out, how could they have let Ash blame herself for things that were out of her control

Ash looked up and at the house, the others were talking and laughing but she wasn't really listening, she could see Jill, was crying, she got up to go inside but stopped when she heard a car pull up, so she went around to the front of the house and was glad it was Gordon

"Dad" Ash said running up to him and giving him a hug before he had fully got out of the car

"What's this all about" asked Gordon shocked

"I'm, sorry, I've made mum upset, she's crying in the kitchen" sobbed Ash

"Listen, it is not your fault, I'll go and talk to her, you go back with the others" replied Gordon

"Sorry" sobbed Ash

Gordon let himself in the front door, Ash went back around the side of the house

"Hello" shouted Gordon as he put his bag back under the stairs

Jill wiped her eyes

"Just in time" said Jill as she put the sandwiches onto the tray, that already had glasses and a jug of squash on it, she then grabbed another glass for Gordon and placed it on the tray

"So, how are you doing" asked Gordon

"I'm, fine" replied Jill

"Really, what she said was" started Gordon

"I'm, fine really" interrupted Jill

Before Gordon could say anything else Jill got in there again first

"Can you take these out, I'll be out in a second" said Jill, not waiting for a response, she left the kitchen and went upstairs.

Gordon did as he was told, he knew there was no good in trying to push Jill into talking at the moment

"Hello" said Gordon as he approached the table

"Hi, dad" replied the kids, they made room for him to put the tray down

"Don't, worry" whispered Gordon to Ash as he pulled up a chair and sat next to her.

Ash nodded, but she couldn't help but feel guilty, she knew she had upset both of them. All she wanted to do was to be on her own, but she knew her grandparents were coming to see her soon. Jill came down having freshened up her make up

"Has everyone got, what they need" asked Jill before she sat down

"Yes, thanks" they all replied

Ash suddenly didn't feel all that hungry, she picked up a sandwich and started picking at it, she knew they were keeping a close eye on her, they had even sat either side of her, Jill poured everyone a drink and handed everyone a glass

"Ash, are you alright" asked Gordon, noticing she wasn't really eating

"Yeah, I'm just not that hungry, I might just go and lie down for a bit" replied Ash

"I, can make you something else" replied Jill

"No, really, I'm fine, I'm just a little tired, but thanks" replied Ash, getting up and taking her drink with her

"Is, she alright" asked Jonathon

"Yes, she's just a little tired, after last night" replied Gordon

"What, because of us" asked Katie

"Well, we think it was a bit too much" replied Jill

"Sorry" replied Katie and Jonathon

"She wanted to know" replied Tom

"Yes, and we would have told her, but that wasn't the right time" replied Gordon

Meanwhile Ash had gone up stairs and had put her music on, she then led on her bed weeping, how could she have upset her parent's, why had she been so selfish and told them all about that, she should have been insistent on talking to someone else, anyone else would have been better, even Sister, at least she wouldn't be feeling so bad

Back outside, they had just finished eating and drinking, Jill gathered the plates and glasses and was going to take them back in

"Mum, I'll do that" said Katie

"I'll give you a hand" added Jonathon

"We, are sorry" said Katie taking the tray from Jill

"It's, alright, no harm done" replied Jill

Jonathon and Katie, went inside and made a start on the washing up, there was a knock at the door, Jonathon went to open it

"Hello, Nan, Grandad" said Jonathon, moving aside to let them through

"Hello, Jonathon" they replied

"They're outside, go on through" replied Jonathon

They said hello to Katie on their way out, and then found Jill, Gordon and Tom sat outside

"Hello, how are you" asked Harold

"Hello, I'm fine, sit down, I'll make us some drinks" replied Jill, getting up and going inside

Harold and Bunty sat down

"So, how are they really" asked Bunty

"They're, getting there, I think they are both blaming themselves" replied Gordon

Meanwhile Ash had heard the front door and had turned her music off and had gone into the bathroom to wash her face, she then went downstairs, she heard Jill talking to Katie in the kitchen

"Right, sweetheart can you put the cups on the tray, and pass me the teapot" said Jill

"Yeah, do you want me to go and get Ash" replied Katie

"No, I'll do this and then if she's not down then, I'll go and get her" replied Jill

Ash walked into the kitchen, just as the kettle flicked off, she kept her head down she didn't want Jill to see she had been crying

"Ash, are you alright" asked Jill

"Yeah, you" replied Ash

"Nan and Grandad are here, why don't you go on out" replied Jill, evading the question

Ash went on outside, she didn't look any one in the eye

"Here, she is" said Gordon, as Ash sat next to him

"How, are you" asked Bunty

"I'm, good thanks, how are you" asked Ash

"We're, both fine, we were worried about you thou" replied Bunty

"Sorry" replied Ash

"What are you sorry for" replied Harold

"Everything" replied Ash

"Sweetheart, you have nothing to be sorry for" replied Gordon, just then Jill and the others came out with the drinks

"Don't tell mum, please" pleaded Ash, Gordon nodded, just as Jill reached the table


	84. Chapter 84

They sat outside talking about nothing much, but both Jill and Gordon were becoming worried about Ash, she hadn't taken her eyes off her cup, which she had in her hand, the phone rang, Ash quickly put her cup down

"I'll go" said Ash getting up before anyone had a chance to reply, she picked up the phone

"Ormerod residence" said Ash

"Hello, Aisling, can I speak to Jill please" said Sister

"I'll, just go and get her" replied Ash, before sister could say anything else she put the receiver down and went to the back door

"Mum, it's for you" shouted Ash

"Okay" replied Jill, getting up

Ash went back to the phone

"Hello" Ash said checking Sister was still there

"Hello" replied Sister

"She's just coming" replied Ash

Jill came in and mouthed who is it, it was now she realised why Ash hadn't been looking at them

Sister mouthed back Ash, handing the phone over

"Hello, Sister" said Jill

"Hello, Jill" replied Sister

"What, can I do for you" replied Jill

Ash had gone upstairs, why had she not even asked how she was, so she decided to listen in to see what was going on

"Well, I can't make it tomorrow, I've been asked to stay on for another week" replied Sister

"But, you're not going to" replied Jill

"Yes, I feel I'm needed here more, besides she is home now" replied Sister

"No, you are needed here, she is not coping well, once was bad enough" replied Jill

"Well I've said yes now, I will pray for her" replied Sister

"Well, you will have to tell her yourself, I hope you are willing to take the consequences" replied Jill, getting annoyed

"Well, about that, I was hoping you would, I haven't got time" replied Sister

Ash started coming down the stairs

"Ohh, no chance you can talk to her now" replied Jill

"Sweetheart, can you come here please" said Jill to Ash

Ash went towards Jill, Jill went to hand the phone over

"Jill, I really have to go" said Sister hanging up the phone

"Typical" said Jill putting the phone down

"Can, you go and get your dad, I need to have a word with him" said Jill, going through to the kitchen with Ash

Ash did as she was told and went to the table, Gordon looked up and realised the same as Jill

"Dad, mum needs a word" said Ash

"Okay, sorry I'll be right back" said Gordon getting up and going inside

"Ash, has been crying what's going on" asked Gordon as he went through the door

"I believe she was crying after lunch, as to the reason I don't know yet" replied Jill as she sat down

"I don't know how to put this" continued Jill

"What, who was on the phone" asked Gordon, also sitting down and taking Jill's hand

"Sister" replied Jill

"Asking about Ash" asked Gordon

"No, to tell me she won't be coming, she's staying on another week" replied Jill

"What" said a shocked Gordon

"I tried, I really tried, how do I tell Ash" replied Jill, starting to get upset

"I tried to make her tell her, herself, but she hung up on me" continued Jill

"Hey, don't worry, we all know how hard you tried, Ash was there with you so she knows" replied Gordon

"Ash, wasn't there she was upstairs" replied Jill

"Don't worry she knows, we will tell her together" replied Gordon getting up and going to the back door

"Ash, can you come here, please" shouted Gordon

Ash, got up and went inside

"Ash, sweetheart we need to talk" said Jill, motioning for her to join them at the table, Ash knew it was serious,

"I was right, I did upset you" said Ash, Jill and Gordon were shocked

"I'm sorry, if I need to talk, I'll find someone else" added Ash

"No, that's not what we need to talk about" replied Gordon

"We, love it when you talk to us, we can discuss that later when Nan and Grandad have gone" replied Jill

"No, we need to talk about Sister" added Gordon

"What, did she say to you" asked Jill

"Nothing, she asked to talk to you and that was it, honestly" replied Ash, it took until now for Ash to look them in the eyes

"So, as you know, she should have been coming to see you tomorrow, well the thing is" started Jill

"Something, more important came up" interrupt Ash

"Let, your mother finish" said Gordon, knowing Jill was finding this hard

"Sorry" replied Ash

"She, won't be coming, she has been asked to stay on for another week, I'm sorry baby" replied Jill rubbing, Ash's arm

"It's not your fault, she should have told me" replied Ash

"I, tried" replied Jill

"I know, and I'm grateful for all you have done" replied Ash, getting up and going outside

"See, what did I tell you" said Gordon

"I think, she's putting a brave face on things" replied Jill

"Well, we will sort it all out later, like we said" replied Gordon getting up and putting his hand out for Jill

"Ohhhh, I forgot, I have to phone Matron, and tell her not to bother tomorrow" said Jill

"Why, why don't we just have a nice day tomorrow, we could all go to the beach, make a day of it" replied Gordon as they walked to the table

They reached the table, the boys had gotten bored so were kicking a football around, but it was getting closer to the table

"Boy's be careful, please" said Gordon, kicking the ball back to them before sitting down

"Okay" replied the boy's

Jill sat down next to Ash and took her hand and squeezed it, Ash smiled back

"Could, anyone do with another drink" asked Jill

"I'll make them" said Katie after everyone had replied Yes

"I'll give you a hand" said Ash getting up and following her in

"So, what was that all about" asked Katie

Meanwhile outside Bunty was asking Jill and Gordon the same question

"Sister is staying there another week" replied both Ash and Jill

"How did she take it" asked Bunty

"Too well" replied Gordon

Back inside

"Are you alright with that" asked Katie

"I have to be" replied Ash

"What do mum and dad say" asked Katie

"Not much, I didn't really give them a chance" replied Ash, picking up the kettle and filling up the tea pot before filling up the kettle again

"You know, they are there for you, we all are" replied Katie

"I know, but I just need time, I mean she didn't even ask how I was" replied Ash

"I'm not sure I even want to see her" added Ash picking up the kettle again and filling up the coffee pot

"Right, well we had better take this out" replied Katie, not sure what to say

Katie picked up the tray and carried it to the table

"Thanks girls" said Jill

"It was more Katie" replied Ash sitting down

"Yeah, you weren't much help" replied Katie jokingly,

"Well, I did only offer one hand" joked Ash, before a shocked Gordon could tell Katie off

"Right, we have to talk before we leave" said Bunty

"What about" asked Jill

"Well, we can see you are both blaming yourselves" replied Bunty

Jill looked at Ash, who was looking at the ground again, they both really didn't want to do this in front of everyone

"Well, I think that, that is for me and Ash to discuss, alone" replied Jill, taking Ash's hand

"You have to get this sorted for everyone" replied Bunty

Jill looked to Gordon for support, who could also see the change in Ash

"I think, Jill is right, it is for her and Ash to sit down and talk" said Gordon

"Right, well maybe we should go, I know when I'm not wanted" replied Bunty

"No, mum that's not what we are saying" said Jill

"No, it's time for us to go" replied Bunty, clearly upset

"Please don't go" begged Ash

"I, do blame myself for lots of things, like making mum cry today, and causing them so much pain, but I want to talk to them about it, later when it's just us, but I want you to stay and talk about normal things so things are normal for a while, before I cause more pain" continued Ash

No one said anything for a second they were all trying to take it in

"Sweetheart, you are not to blame" said Jill, she knew it was not enough to stop her from blaming herself though, but it was a start

"Okay, we will stay for a little longer" said Harold

"Thanks" replied Ash


	85. Chapter 85

They sat talking for another couple of hours then Harold and Bunty really had to go, Jill and Gordon had gone in to make a start on dinner. The kids had left them to it knowing they needed to talk things through. The boys were still playing football, the ball came over to Ash,

"Go, on Ash kick it back" said Tom

Ash got up

"They are watching" warned Katie

"So" replied Ash, kicking the football back

There was a tap from the window

"I, told you they were watching" said Katie

"What, it's not like I'm playing" replied Ash turning to look at the kitchen window, Jill and Gordon were stood there shaking their heads. Ash sat back down and mouthed sorry

"This place is no fun anymore" said Ash

"They are just looking out for you, I mean with those injuries, some people wouldn't be out of hospital yet" replied Jonathon

"I know, sometimes, I just" started Ash, before stopping what she was saying knowing she was saying too much

Before anyone could question her, she got up and went indoors

"Alright, sweetheart" said Jill as Ash made her way in

"Yeah, I just need a little time on my own" replied Ash, walking through and making her way towards the stairs before they could answer

Ash went to her room and turned her music on, she shut her door and climbed on her bed she was frustrated with everything that was going on and now to top it all off Sister wasn't coming to see her

Meanwhile Jill and Gordon were still in the kitchen, Gordon could tell Jill was worried

"Why, don't you go and talk" said Gordon

"No, you heard her she needs space" replied Jill

"But she also, needs to talk" replied Gordon

"Yes, and in her mind, she has just been abandoned by sister again" replied Jill

"All the more reason to talk, why don't you just take her a drink up and see what happens" replied Gordon, Jill was thinking about it

"I'll, keep an eye on dinner" added Gordon

Jill knew it would be worth a try, so she grabbed a couple of glasses and filled them with lemonade, she then gave Gordon a peck on the cheek before going upstairs. She gently tapped on the door, but there was no answer from inside, she knocked again a little louder.

There was still no answer, she slowly opened the door in case Ash was a sleep, she noticed Ash was led on her bed and that she had her music on, it was loud enough that Jill could hear the beat, she put the glasses down on the desk, then made her way towards Ash.

Ash saw the movement out of the corner of her eye and slipped her headphones off

"Sorry, I thought you might like a drink" said Jill

"Thanks" replied Ash

"Can I get you anything else" asked Jill

"No, thanks, I'm sorry for kicking the ball" replied Ash turning her music off

"We, were just worried you might start playing, we know how rough the boys can get" explained Jill

Jill went to leave and was already in the doorway, she saw Gordon at the bottom of the stairs

"Why, doesn't she want me" asked Ash

"She does, she loves you very much" replied Jill turning back around

"Funny way of showing it" replied Ash, she was about to put her head phones back on

"Can I sit down" asked Jill, Ash thought about it and then nodded

"You, remind us all of Moria, you are like her in some ways, it was difficult between Sister and her, just before she had you, there was lots of things going on and Sister feels guilty for what happened, it's best if you don't know all the details for now, but she does love you very much" said Jill

"So, it feels like when I need her she is never there" replied Ash, harshly

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean" replied Ash quickly, not wanting it to sound as if they weren't enough

"I, know what you meant" replied Jill

"Well I'm sure the week will go quickly anyway, what with the others still being here" added Jill trying to turn it into a positive

They heard someone on the stairs, it was Gordon

"Can I get you anything" asked Gordon

"No thanks" replied Jill

"Actually, do you have a minute" asked Ash

"For you, of course" replied Gordon making his way in, he pulled out the chair and sat down

"Well, to start with I am sorry, I upset you both" started Ash, Jill shook her head

"Don't pretend, I know I did and I also know, we are both blaming ourselves for everything, but I want you to know I don't blame you for anything, I know you would always put us first and would never put any of us in harm's way and I don't want you blaming yourselves" said Ash

"How, did you get so grown up, we were upset but only because we don't like seeing any of you going through the pain that you are going through, and if we could go through it instead we would" replied Jill

"I know, you would, but we don't like seeing you upset either" replied Ash, she took Jill's hand and squeezed it, she then took a deep breath

"That's why the next thing I'm going to ask is for you, can I get an appointment to talk to someone" said Ash apprehensively

Ash, looked at Gordon and then at Jill, she could see the pain in their eyes

"It's not that I don't want to talk to you, it's just I don't want to upset you more than I have" continued Ash

Jill looked at Gordon, pleading him to stop her

"Sweetheart, we like to think you could talk to us about anything" said Gordon

"I can, it's just" started Ash

"That's settled then, you can talk to us" interrupted Gordon getting up and going back downstairs to check on dinner

"Sweetheart, what he means is, we only get upset because we care" said Jill once Gordon had gone

"I know, but I feel I've caused enough hurt to last a lifetime" replied Ash

"That's not possible, besides we would still worry whether you talk to us or not, because we are your parents" replied Jill, come on let's go down diners nearly ready getting up

"Thanks" replied Ash getting up and giving her a cuddle

"No, thank you, I know it isn't easy, I know I've found it hard talking about it with your father" replied Jill

"I'm always, free to listen" replied Ash

"Thank you, but it's not fair on you" replied Jill

"I mean it, you are always there for me, I want to repay you" replied Ash

Ash followed Jill downstairs, they went through to the kitchen

"Just in time, I was just about to call you" said Gordon

"Shall we sit outside" said Jill

"Yeah" said Ash

"Okay, Ash do you think you could manage to take this out" asked Gordon, handing the cutlery, salt and pepper and tomato sauce

"Yes, I think so" replied Ash, going out the door

Katie helped take some of the things off of her as she reached the table, then went inside to help bring out the plates

When they were, all sat down, Jill had sat next to Ash so she could help cut up her food

"So, what are we doing tomorrow" asked Katie

"It's alright, Katie knows, I talked to her" said Ash, seeing the looks on her parents faces

"What's going on" asked Jonathon and Tom, feeling left out

"Sister is not coming, she's staying another week" replied Ash

"Sorry" said Jonathon

"Why, you didn't do anything, I'd rather not talk about it" replied Ash

Jill had finished cutting her food and had given her, her plate, she wasn't feeling that hungry, but she knew she had to eat, especially as she hadn't eaten that much at lunch time

"Well, we thought seeing as it's supposed to be nice, and Matron was coming around, we might go to the beach" said Jill, trying to change the subject to a nicer one, she knew Ash had been putting a brave face on for them earlier

They sat having dinner and talking about what they would take with them tomorrow, they had agreed a time they would be leaving, once they had finished they sent the older three in to do the washing up and to make the drinks

Ash was feeling guilty, it was her turn to do the washing up, but as they pointed out, she couldn't do it because of her cast

"We, need to ask you something" said Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash, not sure where this was going

"Are, you alright with Sister, not coming" asked Gordon

"I don't have much choice, she has made her decision, I'm just hurt that she couldn't tell me herself" said Ash

"That's understandable" replied Jill

"She didn't even ask how, I was" said Ash getting upset, Jill put an arm around her

"I'm not sure, I want to see her" said Ash

"Well, we'll see, give it a few days and then see how you feel" said Gordon trying to be diplomatic

"I don't think I will change my mind, I'm fed up of her only showing up when it suits her, she thinks she knows best, but when I need her she's never there, not like you two" replied Ash starting to cry

"Sshhhh, it's alright, we are behind you whatever you decide" said Jill wiping away the tears

"Yes, that's right, we are behind you" said Gordon

"Thanks" replied Ash

"Just, promise to think about it, you've been through a lot" said Gordon

"I promise" replied Ash, but Jill knew she had already been thinking about it for a while, she knew Ash wasn't the type to just decide on something like this she had been stewing on it for a while

"Why, don't you go and see how the others are doing" said Jill to Gordon

Gordon went inside

"Baby, how long have you felt this way" asked Jill

"I don't know, a while" said Ash trying to put off answering it

"Truthfully, I know you, you wouldn't just come out with something like this" said Jill

"Okay, I suppose I've been thinking more about it lately, but I suppose I've been feeling like this for the past year" said Ash

"Why, wait until now" asked Jill

"I suppose, because she is family and you can't choose family and I thought maybe I was just expecting too much from her, I mean compared to others I feel she hardly knows anything about me, and sometimes it just feels like she isn't interested" replied Ash

"She does care, it's just hard, when she joined the sisters she had to give up a lot" said Jill

"That's no excuse, either she wants to know or she doesn't, I don't want any in-between any more" replied Ash

Before anymore could be said the others had finished and were making their way out

"Okay, you will have to talk to her and it won't be easy, but we will be with you all the way" said Jill

"Thanks, I know, but I have to do this, otherwise I'm going to hate her more" replied Ash just as the others joined them

"What are you talking about" asked Tom

"Tomorrow" replied Jill

"What about it" asked Tom

"I was just asking" started Jill

"What cake we should have" interrupted Ash

"You said chocolate right, there is only one type of cake and that is chocolate" replied Katie

"Of course, she did" replied Jill, giving Ash's hand a quick squeeze to say thank you for helping to get out of that one

They sat talking about nothing important for half an hour, then Jill got up

"Where are you going" asked Katie

"Well, I've got to go shopping, for food for tomorrow, especially as I've got to make a chocolate cake" replied Jill

"Can I come" asked Ash

"Of course, you can, but I'm going now" replied Jill

"Okay, I'm ready" replied Ash

"Right, we will be back soon" replied Jill going inside to get her bag and keys, Ash went around the side of the house and met Jill by her car


	86. Chapter 86

"That was quick thinking back there" said Jill as she pulled out of the drive

"Yeah, sorry I didn't mean to make more work for you" replied Ash

"You, haven't, I would have had to go shopping anyway, once dad and I had decided what we had planned for tomorrow" replied Jill

"Can I help you make the cake" asked Ash

"Of course, you can" replied Jill

They were silent for a few minutes, Ash was busy thinking about how she could persuade her parents to let her go to the accident site

"What are you thinking about" asked Jill

"Nothing" lied Ash, she still wasn't sure it was the best idea to ask them yet

Jill knew not to push her into talking, but she also knew that whatever she was thinking about was important and that she was worried about telling them, she knew Ash would talk when she was ready, they drove the rest of the way in silence. They quickly made their way around the store and then made their way back to the car, Jill carried the bags back to the car, she wouldn't let Ash help which didn't go down well

Once they were back in the car, Jill thought she would break the silence

"Sweetheart, you know you don't have to talk to anyone else, we do you really love it when you talk to us" said Jill

"I know, but I don't like seeing you upset" replied Ash

"We don't like seeing you upset either" replied Jill

Ash didn't quite know what to say, so said nothing the rest of the way home, as they pulled on to the drive Jill broke the silence

"Can, you go on and put the oven on for me" asked Jill

"Okay, mum" replied Ash getting out of the car and going towards the door, which opened just as she reached it

"Alright" asked Gordon

"Yeah, I think mum could do with a hand though" replied Ash, she then went through and took her shoes off before going through to the kitchen

Ash put the oven on as instructed then pulled out the scales and the mixing bowl from the cupboard and was thinking about what else they would need when both Jill and Gordon entered the kitchen, she made space on the table for them to put the bags down and then sensing that they need to talk made an excuse to leave

"I'll be back in a second, I've just got to" started Ash leaving the kitchen and going upstairs

"Is everything alright" asked Gordon

"I think so, she was very quiet" replied Jill

"But she will talk when she is ready" added Jill going over to the sink

"Is there anything I can do to help" asked Gordon

"No, Ash said she would" replied Jill

"Well, if you need me, I'll be in the study" replied Gordon

"Okay, where are the others" asked Jill, seeing they weren't outside and the house seemed too quiet

"They went out, don't worry they know if they're not ready, we will go without them" replied Gordon

"I thought they weren't allowed out until after the weekend" replied Jill

"Well, with everything that's happened" replied Gordon

"And you say I'm a soft touch Gordon Ormerod" replied Jill, giving him a peck on the cheek

Gordon went through to the study, just as Ash came down the stairs and went into the kitchen

"Mum" said Ash

"Yes" replied Jill

"Does Matron, like chocolate cake" asked Ash

"Yes, I'm sure she does, that reminds me, I had better phone her and let her know the plans have changed" replied Jill going into the hallway and picking up the phone

Jill had been on the phone to Matron for the last twenty minutes, Ash had got bored of waiting and had started to make the cake, she had made the mixture but was having difficulty in holding the bowl to pour the mix into the tins. Ash went to find Gordon, she saw the study door was open so she went to look in there first

"Dad" said Ash as she reached the door

"Yes" said Gordon looking up

"Can you help me, please" asked Ash

"Yes, of course" replied Gordon he got up and followed Ash to the kitchen

"So, what can I do for you" asked Gordon

"Can you hold this, so I can scrape it into the tins" replied Ash, Gordon nodded and picked up the bowl

Once they had finished and the cakes were in the oven

"Is there anything else" asked Gordon

"No, thanks" replied Ash, setting the timer and starting to tidy up, Gordon went back through to the study

Ten minutes later and Jill had just finished her call to Matron, she had gone through to Gordon to see if he would like a drink, meanwhile Ash had done as much as she could and had sat down at the table with her back to the door, she had picked up one of Jill's medical journals and had started to read it, while she waited for the cakes to cook

There was a loud bang on the window which made her jump, she banged her cast against her chest which gave her a sharp pain, she then started to have trouble breathing. Just then the others came in through the door and could see something wasn't right

"Mum, Dad" shouted Katie

"What now" muttered Gordon as they made their way to the kitchen

"Ash, take some deep breaths" said Tom

"Ash, sweetheart, it's alright, take deep breaths for me" said Jill moving towards her and kneeling down in front of her

Gordon had gone into the hallway to get a bag

"Ash, look at me, you are fine I promise, take long slow breaths for me" said Jill, rubbing Ash's hand

"What happened, she was fine just a minute ago" said Gordon as he made his way in and handed Jill her bag

The older three just looked at each other

"We should give you some space" said Jonathon

"You're not getting away with it that easily" replied Gordon as they made their way out

"Sweetheart, where does it hurt" asked Jill

Ash pointed to her ribs on her left-hand side, her back and her side that always gave her pain

"Right, I want you to breath into this paper bag, while I listen to your chest" said Jill

Ash had different ideas, she wasn't going to let them anywhere near her chest, just then the timer went off, making Gordon jump although he said he was doing it to take Ash's mind off of what was going on. Ash pointed to the oven

"Okay, I will take a look in a minute" said Jill

Ash shook her head, and was going to get up, but Jill put a hand on her shoulder to keep her where she was

"Gordon, can you take a look please" asked Jill trying to get Ash to stay still

Gordon went to the oven and pulled out the cakes

"What do you think" he asked Jill

"Really, must I do everything" replied Jill, getting up to have a look, Ash nodded

"Cheeky, I'll sort you out in a minute" said Jill to Ash

"So, what do you think" asked Gordon

"They're done" replied Jill

"What, about this one" asked Gordon, looking at Jill she knew he knew they were done, and that he was asking about Ash

"I'm concerned, normally by now if it was a panic attack her breathing should have slowed down by now, I think she may have punctured a lung, but she won't let me listen, she keeps wriggling" whispered Jill

"Okay, so we take her in just to be on the safe side" Gordon whispered back

"Just, give me one more chance" whispered Jill

"Yes, they both look fine" said Jill, turning back to Ash

"Right, missy I am going to be honest with you, you either let me listen to your chest here or we take you in" said Jill, kneeling down in front of Ash again

Normally Ash would have chanced her arm and tried to get out of it, but she was also aware that if it was a panic attack her breathing should have got back to normal by now, so she nodded

"Right, just stay still" replied Jill, as she got her stethoscope off of the table, she then carefully tried to lift Ash's top

"I'm, sorry baby" said Jill as she did it, she could see Ash crumple her face up in pain

Gordon came over to help

"Here, take my hand and squeeze it as hard as you like, when it hurts" said Gordon, Ash took his hand but never squeezed it, with his other hand he helped Jill by holding Ash's t shirt up

"Nearly done" said Jill as she got up to listen to her back

"Can, you move slightly forward" asked Gordon

Ash carefully moved forward on her seat

"Right, all done" said Jill

As Jill packed her stethoscope away, Gordon help Ash pull her top down, he then looked at Jill

"Right, we are going to have to take you in" said Gordon

Ash didn't say or do anything, she was finding it hard enough to concentrate on her breathing and the pain was starting to get too much, Jill got down to her level

"Sweetheart, I'm going to give you something for the pain, then we are going to get you in the car" said Jill, Ash nodded

"Right this will help with the pain" said Gordon handing Jill a syringe

"What's going on, what's wrong, why does she look so pale" asked Jonathon

"Right, no time to explain, help me get her in the car" said Gordon, Jonathon nodded

"Right, carefully, don't grab her to tightly" said Jill

She could see the pain on Ash's face, but she never made a sound, Jill grabbed her bag and Ash's hand and followed Jonathon out to the car, Gordon had already gone on and opened the car door

"Right go back inside, we won't be long" said Gordon

"No, I'm coming this is partly my fault" replied Jonathon getting in the passenger seat

Once they had got Ash in the car Jill didn't like the look of how much she was struggling to breath so she went to the boot for the immediate care bag

"Jill" said Gordon

"She's got a pneumothorax, I'm going to have to do this" said Jill, getting what she was looking for and then going around to Ash

"Right, baby, this is going to hurt but I promise you will feel better" said Jill

Ash was scared and wasn't sure if she wanted this

"Ash, sweetheart, I'm going to insert this needle, it will help the air escape, I promise you will feel better" said Jill, Ash nodded

"Here, hold my hand" said Jonathon, he then started telling her what they had been up to that afternoon

Once that was done, and Ash was starting to breathe a little easier they made their way into the royal


	87. Chapter 87

They arrived at the royal, Gordon pulled up and then got out to go and get a wheelchair

"It's alright, it won't be that much longer now" said Jill trying her best to keep Ash calm

"Why, don't I just carry her in" asked Jonathon

"I, can walk" said Ash breathlessly

"No, your dad won't be long, see here he comes now" said Jill, relieved to see him

They wheeled Ash straight through to X-ray and while she was in there

"So, what happened" asked Gordon

"I had better tell the others what is going on" replied Jonathon getting up to leave

"Do, you want me to call sister" he asked knowing this would give him extra time

Jill and Gordon both looked at each other

"No, we would rather you told us what happened" replied Jill

Before anything else could be said Ash was wheeled back out, they took her down to casualty

"I'll give you some space" said Jonathon, Jill had followed him out to see if she could hurry the results up a little

"Right, I'm going to make you little comfier" said Gordon helping Ash on to the bed

"When can this come out" asked Ash pointing to the needle

"Shortly, first we have to insert a chest drain" replied Gordon

"No, please don't, I feel fine now" begged Ash

"Sweetheart, you have to let us do this, it is for the best" replied Gordon

"Is there nothing else" asked Ash

"No, this really is the only way" replied Gordon

"How long will it take" asked Ash

"Right, now that doesn't matter, what matters is making you better" replied Gordon

"But" started Ash, just then Jill walked back in

"Have you still not done it yet" asked Jill as she pulled the X-ray out of the sleeve

"No, someone is being a little bit difficult" replied Gordon walking over and looking at the film

"Right, well, this proves it, there is no other way" said Gordon, going back over to Ash

"Dad's right, you have broken your ribs and there is air trapped in your pleural cavity and this is the only way" added Jill

Ash gave up and let Gordon put the drain in, he then went off in search of Jonathon to take him back home

"How's the pain" asked Jill

"Okay" replied Ash, she was upset, she had ruined a day out before it had even happened, why was she so jumpy, they had only knocked on the window for heaven's sake, why did she have to over react and cause all of this

"What's wrong, are you sure you're not in too much pain" asked Jill as she finished tiding up

"I'm fine" replied Ash but she knew she wasn't fooling anyone

"So, what happened" asked Jill

"Right, I'm just going to take this one back" said Gordon from the door way, Jonathon went on in

"I'm sorry Ash, I hope you feel better soon" said Jonathon

"It's not your fault, see you tomorrow" she said as they left

Jill waited until they had left

"So, what happened" Jill tried again

"I, can't" started Ash

"It's alright, your Dad will get it out of the others" said Jill, clearly upset, she thought Ash would tell her everything

"It's not like that" started Ash

"Then, why" said Jill

Ash didn't look at Jill, she knew that she would never give up until she knew what had happened

"It, was me I did it to myself, I'm sorry" said Ash, trying to get it over with

"I, don't believe you" said Jill, not buying the lie for a second

"Honestly, I did this to myself, I wanted some time on my own with you and dad, I didn't mean for this to happen though" lied Ash, not wanting to cause any arguments with the others

"I, don't believe you, I am going to go and call dad, and when I come back, I want the truth" said Jill, clearly annoyed,

Jill didn't wait for a reply, she went straight out of the door and to her office, she sat her desk

"ARRGGGH" Jill said holding her head in her hands, she then picked up the phone and dialled home

"Ormerod residence" said Katie

"Katie, can I speak to your Dad" said Jill

"Right, I want the truth now" shouted Gordon, it was loud enough that Jill could hear him on the other end of the phone clearly

"Dad, it's mum" said Katie

"Okay, right you three stay in there, I haven't finished with you yet" said Gordon

"Is everything alright, I won't be too much longer" said Gordon to Jill

"She's saying she done it to herself" said Jill

"That, doesn't make sense, why" replied Gordon

"She says, she wanted to spend more time with us alone" replied Jill

"One, second" replied Gordon to Jill

"Go, back in there and wait for me" said Gordon

"Is, Ash alright" asked Katie

"I will tell you when I've finished talking to mum" replied Gordon

"What's going on" asked Jill

"Nosey, parkers" replied Gordon

"So, what do you think" asked Jill

"Well, what she is saying doesn't make sense, maybe she's saying it to cover up for the others" replied Gordon

"I know that, but why" asked Jill

"Because she thinks she's caused too much trouble already" added Jill answering her own question

"Why, don't you try again" said Gordon

"Are, they listening in again" asked Jill

"Yes, I know but that has to be the last thing we try" replied Gordon

"Are, you trying to guilt them into confessing, Mr Ormerod" replied Jill

"Yes, you were quite right to phone, I will be right there" replied Gordon

"Don't be too hard on them" said Jill

"No, I will ask them one more time, it's easier to treat if we know exactly what happened, I will be with you as soon as possible, love you both" said Gordon

"Love you to, bye" replied Jill, putting the receiver down

"Dad, what is it, what's happened" asked Tom

"I, haven't got long, but if you can tell us anything it would be helpful" replied Gordon

"But, she was fine when we left" replied Jonathon

"There's been a complication, but I've got no time to explain" replied Gordon starting to put his coat and shoes on

"Alright, we didn't mean to hurt her" said Katie

"Yeah, we thought it was mum" added Tom

"What, did you do" asked Gordon

"We knocked on the window, and made her jump" replied Jonathon

"Well, that wasn't a very good idea, even if it had been mum, after what they have been through" said Gordon

"We, are sorry" said Tom

"She, will be alright, won't she" asked Jonathon

"Yes, I'm sure she will be" replied Gordon

"Can, we come with you" asked Katie

"No, I think you have done enough for tonight, I will call you with any news" replied Gordon, opening the door and leaving

Gordon made his way to the royal

Meanwhile Jill, had gone back to Ash, she had made them both a drink

"Here, you go" said Jill, placing Ash's drink on the table in front of her

"Thanks" said Ash, she was feeling guilty for lying

"So, how are you feeling" asked Jill, looking at the drain

Ash didn't say anything, but she was trying to make herself more comfortable

"Here, let me help you, so are you ready to tell me the truth" said Jill, helping Ash sit up

"I, told you I did it to myself" replied Ash

"I don't believe you" said Jill sitting down, when Ash didn't reply Jill continued

"You, see one thing doesn't add up, you say you did it to spend time with dad and me, but you were already doing that, and it's not long before the others leave anyway" said Jill

Ash, didn't answer, she just stared at a spot on the floor

"Well, if that is the truth, just wait until your dad gets here" added Jill clearly angry

They sat in silence until Gordon arrived, Ash was trying to keep back the tears, she had upset her mum, it was the last thing she wanted to do, but she didn't want the others to get into trouble either, and it wasn't like she was lying about it all, she had technically done it to herself

"So, I've heard it from mum, now I want to hear it from you" said Gordon

"I'm, sorry, I did it to myself" said Ash still sticking to the story

"Well, we don't believe you" replied Jill

"Shall, I tell you what I think happened" said Gordon

"I'm telling you, I did it to myself" said Ash

"Give, up I know the truth" said Gordon

"Then you will know, I banged my cast against my chest" replied Ash

"Yes, you did do that" said Gordon

"Why, would you do that" said Jill,

"I've, told you why" replied Ash, not knowing the others had already told Gordon everything

"Are, you going to tell your mother the truth or am I" said Gordon

Ash just shrugged her shoulders, thinking he was just bluffing, to try to get it out of her

"Well, the others, saw Ash sat at the table reading, they tapped on the window, thinking it was you and made her jump" said Gordon

"So, why did you make up the other story" asked Jill, bewildered

Before Ash could reply they were interrupted by a nurse

"Sorry, Doctors, could one of you take a quick look at a patient on Milner" asked the nurse

"Yes, of course, I'll be right there" said Gordon, getting up and following her out

"So" said Jill

"I thought, it was easier to say that, it was only a little white lie, I mean, I did cause the injury to myself, and the others didn't mean for it to happen" started Ash

"You, mean you didn't want to get the others into trouble" said Jill

"Well, yeah, you would have told them off, they would hate me, they already think" started Ash

"Think, what" replied Jill

"That, I get away with a lot more, because of what happened, that you both feel guilty and that you give me an easy time because of it" said Ash

"That's not true" replied Jill, shocked

"I, know we all know the favourite is Jonathon" replied Ash, cheekily

"That, is not true, we love you all equally" replied Jill

"I, know, but we all get jealous of each other, we all think the others have more than us, but that's just family" replied Ash

"Don't, let your drink go cold" replied Jill

"When, can we go home" asked Ash

Jill looked at the drain again, the air seemed to have stopped coming out

"We, will see, but probably in a couple of hours why" asked Jill

"Just, wondered" replied Ash

"I, tell you what, I will see if I can find a game" said Jill getting up

"I'm, sorry, for not telling you" said Ash

"Well, let's hear no more about it" replied Jill, leaving the room

Jill came back five minutes later, with the snakes and ladder game that had been left in Gordon's office all the others had been locked away for the night

Jill sat on the bed next to Ash and put an arm around her, Ash cuddled in

"Right, what colour do you want to be" asked Jill as she set up the board

"Yellow, please" replied Ash

They were about to start when Gordon came back in

"Not, to late am I" he asked

Jill shook her head

"No, we were just about to start" said Ash

Gordon pulled up a chair

"Go, on then dad, you can go first" said Ash

"Thank you" replied Gordon taking the dice from Jill

They sat there playing for the next couple of hours

"Yes, I won" said Gordon

"Yes, but how many did you lose" replied Jill

"Not, that many" replied Gordon

"No, of course not, you do know the aim of the game is not to go down the snakes" replied Ash

"Yes, I do cheeky, right, let's take a look at this drain" said Gordon getting up

"It's been over two hours now, I think we can take it out" said Jill

"Yes, then we can go home right" said Ash

"One, step at a time" replied Gordon


	88. Chapter 88

"Right, Ash this may feel a little odd" said Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash

Gordon went to remove the chest drain while Jill tried to keep Ash calm and as still as possible, it was starting to bruise and was very tender even though they had given her pain relief.

Once Gordon had removed it and sutured the wound, Jill took a look, then placed a dressing over the cut, which made Ash wince

"Sorry" said Jill

"When can we go" asked Ash

"Well, normally we would keep you under observation for another couple of hours" replied Gordon, Jill gave him a look, as if to say don't even think about it

"I'll, just go and get some ice for your side" said Jill getting up

"You, said normally" said Ash once Jill had gone

"Did, I" replied Gordon, he knew she must really be feeling better to pick him up on that

"Yes, you did" replied Ash, confidently

"I did, but I don't think your mum was best pleased" replied Gordon, just then Jill came back

"Pleased, about what" asked Jill

"Going home" replied Ash, getting straight to the point

"Well it's not ideal but we, can go home as long as you stay next to one of us for the next couple of hours" replied Jill, handing the ice pack over to Ash, and giving Gordon a look as if to say look at what you have done now

"Yes, thanks mum" replied Ash

"And you have to keep that on for at least an hour" added Jill

Ash nodded, but she knew there was more to come

"Tomorrow, you have to stay with us, no pushing yourself, by helping to carry bags or playing games" said Gordon

Ash nodded again, right now she didn't feel like doing any of that anyway, all she wanted to do was sleep

"Right, I've got to write these notes up, then we can go" added Gordon

By the time he had finished, Jill had tidied up and had taken the game back to his office, while Ash was nodding off

"Ash, sweetheart, time to go" said Jill

Ash got up slowly, she was feeling rather stiff, they then made their way to the car, Jill and Gordon had decided it would be best if Jill got in the back as well, Jill was making small talk, trying to keep Ash awake and her mind off of the pain. When they arrived home the others came running out, wondering what was going on because Gordon had not phoned them to let them know

"Dad, what is it" asked Tom

"Yeah, how is she" asked Katie, not giving Gordon time to answer Toms question

"She's fine, just give her some space" replied Gordon, going around the car to help Jill get Ash out of the car

"There, was nothing wrong, you made it up" said Jonathon

"That is not true, we will discuss this later, right now Ash needs her rest, so we would appreciate it if you kept the noise down" replied Gordon

"What can we do to help" asked Katie

"Nothing, we need to keep a close eye on her for a couple of hours" replied Gordon as he ushered them all inside

"Ash, we are sorry" said Tom

"Yeah, very sorry" added Katie

"Forget it" replied Ash

"Right, let's get you comfy" said Jill, leading her into the front room, followed by the others

Ash, sat on the sofa and went to take off her shoes

"Let me do that" replied Jill, not waiting for an answer

"And what did I say about keeping that ice on" Jill added

"Can, we get you anything" asked Jonathon, before Ash could say anything to Jill about the ice

"A, drink would be nice" replied Ash

"Right, I've got somethings to do, but dad will be here if you need him, isn't that right Gordon" said Jill

Gordon nodded, the other two were starting to be noisy they couldn't decide which game to play

"Okay, thanks" replied Ash

"Ash, what do you want to play" asked Tom

Ash went to say something but Gordon got in there first

"Ash, is very tired and needs her rest, why don't you go and give mum a hand in the kitchen" said Gordon

"Okay" said Katie and with that they made their way out

"Thanks, dad" said Ash

"Let's see what's on shall we" said Gordon, knowing Ash didn't like all this fussing

Meanwhile in the Kitchen, Jonathon had just about finished making drinks, when the other two came in, Katie made a start on the washing up while Tom made a start on the drying up, without even having to be asked Jill, knew they must be feeling guilty

"I thought you were going to play a game" said Jill

"Dad, said we should give you a hand" replied Tom

"Mum, we are very sorry, we know it was a stupid thing to do" said Jonathon

"We know you are, you're just lucky it wasn't as bad as it could have been" replied Jill

Jonathon handed Jill her drink then went through to Gordon and Ash with theirs

"How, is she" asked Jill, as Jonathon came back in

"Nearly asleep" replied Jonathon

"So, what else can we do" asked Katie

"Well, to start with I need to finish the cake, get plates and things packed for tomorrow" replied Jill

Meanwhile back in the front room

"Dad" said Ash

"Yes" replied Gordon looking up from his paper

"Do I really, need to keep this on" asked Ash

"The longer, the better" replied Gordon

"It's just, really cold and I'm really tired, but I can't sleep and hold it at the same time" replied Ash

"I tell you what, leave it on for a few more minutes and then I will take a look" replied Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash, she took a sip of her drink, and Gordon went back to reading his paper

Fifteen minutes later and Ash had fallen asleep, she dropped the icepack, which made Gordon look up, he picked it up and put it on the table, he then went into the hallway and grabbed a blanket that Jill had put by the front door for tomorrow, which he carefully draped over Ash, he then picked up their mugs and the ice pack and went to the kitchen to see how Jill was getting on

"Gordon" said Jill slightly panicked

"She's fine, she's sound asleep" replied Gordon

"Well, I won't be long, we're almost done here" replied Jill

"Why, don't you go now, we can finish clearing up" replied Katie

"Yeah, it's the least we can do" added Jonathon

"Okay, just try to keep the noise down" replied Jill

Jill followed Gordon through to the front room, she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw for herself how peaceful Ash looked. Gordon sat in his chair, and changed the channel so they could watch the news, Jill got them both a glass of wine then sat in the other chair.

Ten minutes had passed when the other three popped their heads in to say goodnight, they finished watching the news then switched the television off, they sat there quietly talking for another couple of hours, neither of them having the heart to wake her up yet

"Why, don't you go on up love, I don't mind staying with her" said Gordon

"No, it's fine I was going to stay with her anyway" replied Jill

"There's no need, she's fine" replied Gordon

"I know, I would just feel better, if I did" replied Jill

"Okay, well how about, you go on up to bed, when she wakes up, I will take her to our room to you, and I will stay in her room" replied Gordon

"Okay, I'll just go and get everything ready, ohh and Gordon, don't leave her sleeping too long" replied Jill picking up the glasses and going out the door as she said it

There wasn't much chance of that just as Jill was going up the stairs, Ash started to wake, the pain killers they had given her earlier were starting to wear off

"Hello, sleepy head" said Gordon

Ash, panicked realising she wasn't holding the ice pack and moved a little too quickly

"Ash, take it easy, what's wrong" asked Gordon getting up and going over to her

"I've lost the ice pack" replied a groggy Ash, she was clearly in pain

"It's alright, I took it off you when you fell asleep" replied Gordon, getting up and going towards the hallway to get her some more pain relief

"What, time is it" asked Ash

"It, is way past your bed time young lady" replied Gordon going out into the hallway, he found Jill's bag and got what he needed, he then went to the kitchen and got some water then went back to Ash

"Here, you are take these" said Gordon handing them over

"Thanks" said Ash, once she had taken them

"Right, let's get you to bed" said Gordon

"Okay" replied Ash

"You're sleeping in our room tonight" replied Gordon knowing it wouldn't go down well

Ash rolled her eyes

"But I feel fine" said Ash

"I know, but just do it for mum" replied Gordon

Ash didn't have time to reply they had reached her parents room

"Sweetheart, are you alright" asked Jill

"Yeah, I'm just tired" replied Ash, she was annoyed she had to stay in here, she knew if it was one of the others they wouldn't have to

Jill looked at her as if to say I don't believe you

"I'm, fine really" replied Ash

"Right, good night, sweet dreams" said Gordon leaving them to it


	89. Chapter 89

Jill went into the en-suite to get changed, while Ash made her way over and picked up her pyjamas, she was so tired she really didn't have the energy to change into them, she sat on the edge of the bed, she knew she should get moving but she couldn't get herself motivated

Jill came out of the bathroom, expecting Ash to have at least started to get changed

"Sweetheart" said Jill

"Sorry, I" started Ash

"It's alright, I'll give you a hand" replied Jill going over and starting to help Ash get changed

"Ash, I'm just going to take a look" said Jill, helping Ash take her top off

"Okay" replied Ash, she was too tired to put up a fight

Jill carefully tried to peel back the dressing, but the bruising made it difficult, Ash winced just as Jill started to peel it back

"Sorry, baby" said Jill, she peeked then covered it up again, before helping Ash pull her top down

They got into bed without saying another word to each other, Ash was finding it difficult to get comfortable, she was trying not to move too much as she didn't want to be any more of a nuisance, she waited until she thought Jill was asleep then sat up

"What is it, Ash" said Jill, sleepily

"I'm fine, go back to sleep" whispered Ash, but it was useless

"What's wrong" said Jill, sitting up and putting her bedside light on

"Nothing, I just needed a drink" replied Ash, swinging her legs round and getting up

"I'll get it, I could do with one as well" replied Jill, getting up and beating Ash to the door

"You stay here, I'll be back in a minute" added Jill as she left

Ash knew Jill was lying, but did as she was told and got back into bed, she had just found a comfortable position when Jill came back

"Here, you go" said Jill handing the glass to Ash, who had sat up the second Jill had re-entered

"Thanks" said Ash, before taking a sip

"So, what was the real reason" asked Jill

Ash took another sip of her drink before carefully putting it on the bedside table

"I needed a drink" replied Ash

"And" replied Jill, knowing there was more to this

"I couldn't get comfy, but I didn't want to move too much and wake you, but that didn't work either" replied Ash, coming clean, she knew Jill wouldn't give up easily

"Ohh, baby girl, don't you ever worry about me" replied Jill placing her glass down and moving over so she could give Ash a cuddle

"Right, let's see if we can make you more comfortable" said Jill

They got Ash into a comfortable position, then Jill switched off the light, Jill stayed awake a little longer this time just to make sure Ash was asleep this time

There were no more incidents during the night, Jill woke first and carefully got out of bed so as not to wake Ash, she then double checked Ash was okay, before going to see Gordon, she gently tapped on the door, before going in

"Morning" said Jill

"Morning, love" replied Gordon, who was sat up in bed, reading, he put his book down and patted the bed for Jill to come and join him, Jill went and sat down

"So, how is she" asked Gordon

"She's fine" replied Jill

"But" replied Gordon, knowing there was something troubling Jill

"Nothing, it doesn't matter" replied Jill

Gordon went to say something but Jill got there first

"Right, sitting here isn't going to get things done" said Jill getting up

"Jill" said Gordon reaching out and grabbing her hand, stopping her in her tracks

Jill looked back around at him

"We'll talk later" said Jill releasing herself from Gordons grip and going downstairs to make a start on breakfast

Meanwhile Ash had woken up, she could hear Jill and Gordon talking in her room, she carefully got up as she was feeling stiff, she then tried looking at her side but wasn't having much luck, so she went over to Jill's dressing table and angled the mirror so she could see her side, she then carefully lifted her top she could see the bruise it looked nasty, she then tried to peel the dressing just like Jill had done the night before, she had just managed it when the door opened behind her

"What, do you think you are doing" said Gordon

"Sorry, I just wanted to have a quick look" replied Ash, quickly smoothing the dressing down and pulling her top down

"Where's mum" asked Ash, quickly getting in there before Gordon could say something

"Downstairs" started Gordon

"Okay, I'll just" interrupted Ash, quickly stepping around Gordon and shutting the door behind her

Gordon stood there for a second, not quite believing what had just happened, he then got ready before going downstairs where both Jill and Ash were already having their breakfast

"Any sign of the others getting up yet" asked Jill, as Gordon was making his breakfast

"No, but they know what time we are leaving, it's their choice" replied Gordon

Ash could feel the tension between them, she knew she was to blame and wished they would just get it over and done with

They sat there in silence until Ash couldn't take it anymore

"I'm so sorry" said Ash

"What for" asked Jill puzzled

"For everything, that happened yesterday and this morning" replied Ash

Jill and Gordon both looked at each other puzzled

"Well, you are both mad at me, that is why we aren't talking isn't it" said Ash

"No, wait what happened this morning" replied Jill

"Dad, caught me having a look" replied Ash pointing to her side

"We're not mad at you for doing that" replied Gordon

"So, you are mad at me then" replied Ash

"No, of course we are not, are we Gordon, it was an accident" replied Jill

"I'm, sorry I didn't tell you the truth straight away and made you angry" replied Ash

"Well you should know by now, we always find the truth out in the end" replied Gordon

Ash nodded

They had all finished their breakfast, Gordon had gone back upstairs, while Jill was left to clear up, Ash stayed behind to help her

"I'm sorry, if I upset you about the whole favourite thing, and for waking you up" said Ash handing Jill the last of the washing up

Jill placed the dishes in the sink then turned around to face Ash, she placed her hands on Ash's shoulders

"It's fine, let's say no more about it" replied Jill

"I hate upsetting you" replied Ash

"What, did I just say" said Jill pulling Ash into a hug

"Sorry" replied Ash

"Next, time just trust me and tell me the truth straight away" replied Jill

"Okay, I promise" replied Ash

"Right, we had better get a move on or we will not be ready to go either" replied Jill letting Ash go and getting back to the washing up

Ash picked up the tea towel and started drying

They had just finished as Gordon made his way back down

"Right Ash, ten minutes and we are leaving" stated Gordon, as he started getting the things into the car

"Yes, dad" replied Ash, following Jill up the stairs

"Just, do what you can and I'll be in once I'm ready to give you a hand" said Jill as they reached Ash's room

"Okay, thanks mum" replied Ash

Ash went into her room and pulled out some clothes she knew she could manage to get on without any help, she then went through to the bathroom, where she had a quick wash, trying not to get her cast or her dressing wet, it was easier said than done, she then got dressed and brushed her teeth. Ash made her way out of the bathroom and made her way back to her bedroom, she quickly threw somethings into a bag to keep her occupied for the day and then she started to brush her hair

"Are you two ready" shouted Gordon

"Two minutes" Jill shouted back

Jill tapped on Ash's door

"Come in" said Ash

"How are you doing" asked Jill

"I've just got to do my hair, then I'm ready" replied Ash

"Here, let me do it" replied Jill, taking the brush from Ash

"Is a pony tail alright again" asked Jill, Ash nodded

Jill put the brush on the table and secured the ponytail with the hair band Ash passed her

"Thanks mum" said Ash

"Right, let's go we can't keep your dad waiting any longer" replied Jill

Gordon was just about to shout again when he saw them coming

"Still, no sign of the others" asked Jill

Gordon shook his head

"They knew, I've left them a note, they can join us later" replied Gordon

They left and made their way to Matron, who was ready and waiting


	90. Chapter 90

"Where, are the others" asked Matron getting in the car

They let Matron sit in the front which meant Jill got in the back with Ash

"Don't ask" replied Jill

"That bad" replied Matron

"Let's just say, it wasn't their finest work" replied Jill

Matron knew something must have happened after she had talked to Jill last night as she hadn't mentioned anything then, but she didn't know what, she also knew Jill would talk when Gordon wasn't around

"So, how are you" Ash asked Matron

"I'm fine, now that I've caught up with all the paperwork, you know what Lizzie's like with the filing" replied Matron with a chuckle

"Yes, all these years and it hasn't really got any better" replied Gordon, as they pulled into a parking place as near to the path as possible

"Right Ash, remember what we said yesterday" said Gordon turning around to face her

"Yes, dad" replied Ash

They all got out of the car, Ash went around and stood near Jill, while they got what they needed out of the car, there wasn't that much seeing as the others weren't there yet so Jill and Gordon managed it all between them. Ash stayed near Jill all the way down to the beach,

Once they had found the spot, Ash sat on the blanket, while Gordon went off in search of three deck chairs.

Gordon arrived back with the deckchairs, which he let Jill put up as he always struggled with them

They all got settled Gordon had pulled out his paper and had started to do the crossword, While Jill and Matron were chatting

"Is everything alright, with Ash, she looks very tired" asked Matron

"We had a little incident last night" replied Jill

"Is that the reason the others aren't here" asked Matron

"Probably, they are feeling rather guilty, and they know how disappointed we are with all of them" replied Jill

"So, did Ash not want to stay with them" asked Matron

"We, didn't give her a choice, and after what happened, it probably wouldn't be such a good idea" replied Jill

"Mum" said Ash

Ash had pulled out her book and her music and was trying to get comfy, she was finding it difficult and it was only until now that she realised she hadn't taken any pain relief that morning, she knew she had thrown some in her bag

"Yes, sweetheart" replied Jill

"Can, I have a drink please" replied Ash

"Yes, of course, would everyone else like one" asked Jill

Once Jill had handed everyone their drinks, she got back to talking to Matron, but she was keeping a close eye on Ash, Matron was right she did look very tired and she was a little pale

"So, what happened last night" asked Matron

Jill told Matron the whole story of what happened last night, even telling her about the conversation she had, had with Ash

"Well, that's normal with siblings, they all think one is better than the other" said Matron after she had listened

"That's exactly, what she said, but why not tell us what they did, it's not like the others would do that if it had happened to them" replied Jill

"Well, what with everything that's happened, I think she's scared of upsetting too many people, or being the cause of more arguments between you all" replied Matron

"So, what you're saying is that if she took the blame, then the others wouldn't get told off, but we would be angry with her" replied Jill, just then she looked at Ash, who was just taking some pain relief now her drink was cool enough

"Well, yes instead of all five of you angry with her, only two of you would be" replied Matron

"One second" said Jill to Matron

"Ash, are you alright" asked Jill

Ash nodded as she swallowed her drink and put her headphones back on

But she knew that both Gordon and Jill were keeping a watchful eye on her

"Sorry, matron where were we" said Jill

"I think she took the blame, so you all wouldn't hate her" said Matron

"We, don't hate her, we're upset she couldn't tell us the truth" replied Jill

"Does she know that" asked Matron

Jill thought about it, she hoped that they had made it clear to her, but maybe they would have to tell her again later

They had been there a couple of hours when the others turned up

"Hello" said Jill

"Hi mum, dad matron" replied Katie

They sat down near Ash

"Hi, Ash" said Katie

"Hi" replied Ash taking her headphones off

"How are you" asked katie

"We are very sorry" added Tom before she had a chance to answer

"It's fine, honestly" replied Ash trying to get comfortable

"Are you alright" asked Jonathon

"What, is it what's wrong" asked Jill, hearing their conversation

"I'm fine, just a little stiff, stop fussing" replied Ash standing up

"So, have you had the cake yet" asked Katie

"No, we were waiting for you" replied Ash

"So, what is for lunch, I'm starving" said Tom

"You're always hungry" replied Jonathon

"Well, seeing as you are all here" said Jill, opening the hamper

"Mum, do you mind if I go for a wander" asked Ash

Jill looked at her worried, she had seen her take pain relief not that long ago but before Jill could say anything

"What did we tell you earlier" said Gordon looking up from his paper, Ash didn't say anything she just turned and was going to sit back down

"You, know what I'm feeling rather stiff, I could do with going for a walk as well" said Matron winking at Jill

"Yes, I could do with stretching my legs, Ash would you like to join us" asked Jill

Ash nodded, she was glad Matron was here she always seemed to have a way of making everything work out, she wasn't the only one Jill was also thanking her lucky stars Matron was there

"How long are you going to be" whinged Tom

"Well, I'm sure they won't be too long, you can wait until they get back" said Gordon, picking up his paper again

"You, can start without us, just don't eat the cake" said Jill

She was trying to keep the peace, she knew all too well that Gordon wouldn't have a minute's peace if they weren't allowed something

"Well, we won't be long, Ash are you ready" said Jill

Ash nodded, and that was it they went off in the direction of town and the royal, before they were even out of sight the others were already tucking into the sandwiches Jill had prepared that morning

"Leave some for the rest of us" said Gordon far from impressed with their behaviour

"Sorry, dad we haven't had anything all day" replied Jonathon

"Well, whose fault is that" replied Gordon, wishing he had gone with the others, now he knew why Jill had said they could start without them, she had been thinking of him

"So, how is Ash really" asked Katie, they all looked and Gordon waiting for him to answer

"Dad" said Tom

"What" replied Gordon slightly annoyed

"How's Ash really" asked Katie again

"She's fine, a little tired and uncomfortable, so don't go pushing her too much" replied Gordon

"So, what happened yesterday after we left" asked Jonathon

"We, are not talking about this here" replied Gordon, folding his paper, he then stood up

"Right I think I might go and see if I can catch them up" he added, not waiting for a reply


	91. Chapter 91

Gordon caught them up fairly quickly

"Mind if I join you ladies" said Gordon

"No, of course not" replied Matron

"Is, everything alright" asked Jill

"Yes, yes, I needed to stretch my legs" replied Gordon, but by the look that he gave Jill, she could tell something wasn't right

"So, what were you talking about" asked Gordon

"We were just saying what lovely weather we are having at the moment, weren't we Ash" replied Matron

Ash didn't reply she was away with her own thoughts

"Ash" said Gordon, louder bringing her out of her daze, she looked at Gordon

"Matron, was talking to you" said Gordon

"Sorry, what was it" asked Ash

"It doesn't matter now" replied Matron

"Yes, it does, we brought them up to be polite and respectful" replied Gordon

"Yes, I am very sorry Matron, what was it" replied Ash, she stopped to catch her breath, she could see the hospital in the distance she looked back to where the others were and she could just make them out

"We, were only talking about the weather, it was nothing important" replied Matron

"Yes, it has been nice" replied Ash, starting to walk again

"Ash, what's wrong" asked Jill

"Nothing, why" asked Ash

"You, just don't seem yourself" replied Jill

"I'm, fine" replied Ash,

"Really" she added, when she could tell Jill didn't believe her by the look she gave her

Gordon put his hand on Jill's arm to stop her from saying anything else and pushing Ash too much

"So, what else have you got planned this week" Gordon asked, trying to change the subject, because he felt guilty that he had started the trouble in the first place

"Not, much now that I've caught up, I was supposed to be meeting sister but she's cancelled now" replied Matron

"Yes, she's staying on for another week" replied Jill

Ash was starting to feel fed up, why was she always stuck with the adults and their boring conversations about work or family, while the others got away scot free able to do what they liked when they liked, even now they were having fun and not having to listen to this

"Well, is there anything we can help with" asked Gordon

"No, no really it's fine, we just have a little natter every now and then, it's fine really" replied matron

"Well, you are always, welcome around ours" replied Jill

"That's very kind, but I know you are very busy" replied Matron

"It's no trouble, once the others leave, it's just us rattling around in the house anyway" replied Gordon

"I tell you what, we could make it a regular thing, once a fortnight you could come to dinner and we could catch up" added Jill

"Well, I don't know" replied Matron

"Ash would like it, wouldn't you Ash" replied Gordon

"Yes" replied Ash, not really sure what she was saying yes to but she hoped it was the right answer

"There, you go, that settles it, we will sort out a day next week and Gordon will pick you up after work" stated Jill

Matron went to say something, but Gordon got in there first

"We, will hear no more about it" said Gordon

"Well, what have you got planned this week" asked Matron, knowing there was no point in putting up a fight, once Jill and Gordon had decided on something that was it, but she was very happy, she loved spending time with them, she looked on them as family

"Not much, making sure they have all got what they need, and they are not causing too much trouble, especially this one" replied Jill jokingly, expecting Ash to retaliate

Jill looked to Gordon, who had also expected Ash to have said something to that last remark, then they both looked at Ash. They were both clearly worried that she didn't seem herself, she seemed more withdrawn than normal, but then she had been through an awful lot recently, but she was different to how she was yesterday before the incident

"Ash, talk to me please" pleaded Jill

"Lizzie" said Ash, she had spotted Lizzie running towards them

"Sorry, doctors" said Lizzie slightly out of breath

"What, is it, Lizzie" asked Gordon

Lizzie put her hand up to indicate she needed one second

"Ohh, I'm not use to this running lark, anymore" said Lizzie, going off on one of her tangents

"Lizzie" said Gordon, using the tone he used on the Kid's when they weren't doing what they were supposed to

"Sorry, I've been asked to get you, there's been an incident" replied Lizzie

"Right, yes" replied Jill, not quite sure what to do

"You, go on, I'll take this one back, and then Katie can take them home" said Gordon

"No, need you can both go, I'm here and I'm sure Ash and I can manage" replied Matron

"Will you be alright" said Jill to Ash clearly worried, Ash nodded

"I'll be fine, stop worrying" replied Ash

"What about our bags" said Jill to Gordon

"I'll get Alan to fetch them" replied Gordon

"We, can drop them off, on our way home" replied Ash

"Good, idea" replied Gordon, handing Ash his keys, he also knew it would put their minds at rest that they had seen Ash had got safely back to the others

"See, you in a minute" replied Jill

They went their separate ways

Jill and Gordon, were talking about Ash, and how worried they were and what they could do to make it better, meanwhile Matron was asking Ash why she seemed so unhappy

Ash knew she had disappointed her parents and was trying her best, not to make them hate her even more, but she wasn't going to tell anybody that not even Matron

"I'm just a little tired, that's all" replied Ash, they walked the rest of the way in silence

"Where's mum and dad" asked Jonathon

"They had to go, we have to pack up and then take their bags in on the way home" replied Matron

"I'm not going, we only just got here" replied Tom stubbornly

"Well, if Toms not then I'm not" added Katie

"Look, we can argue about it later but they need their bags now" said Ash

They look at each other hoping someone had the answers

"Look if Katie takes me we can give them the bags, tell them we are staying here, leave them the car and then meet you back here" said Ash

"You can't, that's too much" replied Jonathon

"If I don't, they will only worry about me" replied Ash she didn't wait for a reply she started to walk towards the car

"Come on" she said slightly annoyed that they were dawdling, she knew they would need their bags as soon as possible

"I've got money for the bus, if that makes it better" added Ash

"She is right they need their bags as soon as possible, and talking about it isn't going to get them there" said Matron

"Okay, we'll be back soon" replied Katie, getting up and running after Ash who was now nearly at the cars

"How, are we going to get Dad's bag, his cars locked" said Katie

"He, gave me these" replied Ash, already unlocking the car and getting the bag, before Katie could reply

They got into Jill's car and then pulled away

"You had this all panned didn't you" said Katie

"No, I knew you wouldn't want to leave, but they need their bags, I was just trying to make everyone happy" replied Ash, hurt that they could think that about her, maybe mum was right and the others would not have taken the blame for what happened last night if it had been one of them

Katie pulled into the space outside the royal, Ash quickly got out of the car and didn't wait for Katie, she made her way in

"Ash" said Lizzie

"Where are they" asked Ash

"In your dad's office" replied Lizzie

"Okay, thanks" replied Ash, going towards his office

She could hear her parents talking as they had left the door open, but it sounded like they were talking to sister, but they couldn't be she had stayed on for another week

Ash made her way closer

"So, where is she" asked Sister

"Ash, is with the others" replied Jill

"But, I need to see her" replied Sister

"You had the chance, and you decided to stay on" replied Jill, clearly cross

"Yes, you can't expect her to drop everything, when you want her to" added Gordon who also seem angry

Before Ash could knock on the door and interrupt them the on-duty Matron came along the corridor

"Hello, Ash" said the Matron

"Hello" replied Ash, before she had time to say anymore Jill came out of the office

"Thank you, Ash" replied Jill taking the bags from her

"What does she want" whispered Ash to Jill

"To talk to you, but there is no rush, whenever you are ready" replied Jill

"We, are staying at the beach a bit longer, do you want us to leave you a car" asked Ash

"No, we'll be alright, just don't let the others bully you into staying" replied Jill

"I won't, see you later" replied Ash

"Aisling, can we talk" asked Sister

"Ash, are we going or what" asked Katie as she walked though reception

"Yeah, just coming" replied Ash

"Katie, make sure you take care of her" said Gordon

"Will do, see you later" replied Katie

"Bye, mum, dad" said Ash as she gave them a kiss bye on the cheeks and following Katie out

"Sorry, doctors the first arrivals will be here in a minute" said Matron

Just as they could hear the sirens starting to approach

"Sorry, sister but we are going to have to go, we will call you when we have had a talk with Ash" said Jill

Before Sister could reply they walked up the corridor to casualty


	92. Chapter 92

Katie and Ash made their way back in silence, Katie knew Ash was stewing on the whole sister debacle, but she knew Ash wouldn't talk to any of them, the only one she might talk to would be Matron. They pulled up in the car park, they got out of the car and Katie started to go towards the path

"You know what, I might just go home" said Ash, seeing people having fun on the beach

"If you wait, I will get the others" replied Katie

"No, I'd rather be alone" replied Ash, not waiting for a reply, she went towards the bus stop

Katie was not sure what to do, then she finally made her way down to the beach

"What's wrong" Matron asked, as she saw Katie walking alone towards them

"Where's Ash" asked Jonathon

"She wanted to go home" replied Katie

"Why, I thought she wanted to stay" replied Tom

"She, bumped into sister at the royal" replied Katie

"Right, I'm going home" replied Jonathon, knowing she shouldn't be alone and it's what Jill and Gordon would want them to do

"She, wants to be alone" replied Katie

"We, can give her space, but she shouldn't be left alone, she won't tell you but she needs you" replied Matron

"Yeah, matron's right" added Jonathon

They quickly stuffed everything into the bags

"But what about mum and dad, they think we are here" said Tom as they made their way to the car

"When, we get home, we'll phone them and get a message to them" replied Matron

Meanwhile, Ash had gotten on the bus and was nearly home, back at the car

"So, what happened with sister I thought she couldn't get here this weekend" asked Tom

"I don't know, it all happened before I got there" replied Katie

Ash, arrived home and went through to the kitchen to pour herself a drink, she then heard the others pull up, she knew they had come back because of her, there was no way she could face them, she was feeling guilty that she had ruined their fun as well, she made her way up to her room, she shut her door just as the others slammed the car doors

"Right, I'll phone mum, you pack this away" said Katie being bossy and telling everyone else what to do like normal

"Well, you had better check she is here first" replied Tom

"She's here" replied Katie

"How, can you be so sure" asked Tom

"Her, shoes are here" replied Katie, pointing at the shoes and rolling her eyes

The boys looked at each other, then at Katie

"Fine, if you don't believe me, go and check for yourself" replied Katie

"And, say what" asked Tom

"Let, me go" replied Matron, they had all forgotten she was there

They stood watching Matron as she went upstairs, Matron got half way up

"Well, why don't you start packing that away" said Matron, she then carried on up the stairs

They all started to unpack the bags, meanwhile Matron had knocked on Ash's door, she needn't have she knew Ash was in there she could hear the music Ash was playing so no one knew she was crying

Ash could tell by the knock that it must have been Matron, she quickly wiped her eyes and sat at her desk, with her book in front of her so Matron wouldn't see her face

"Come in" said Ash

Matron opened the door and went in

"I, won't stay long, but just to tell you, we are home and if you want to chat I'll be down stairs" said Matron

"Okay, thanks" replied Ash

"Right, well I'll leave you to it, I can see you're busy" replied Matron

"Is, mum home" asked Ash, already knowing the answer

"No, not yet, do you need something" asked Matron

"No, it's not important" replied Ash

"Okay, well you know, where I am if you change your mind" replied Matron, making her way out and shutting the door behind her, and making her way downstairs, the others met her at the bottom, they all looked up at her

"She's here, she's fine just a little tired" said Matron

"Well, I'll phone mum then" replied Katie

"Do you mind, if I phone" asked Matron

"No, of course not, we'll be outside" replied Jonathon, which got him a look from Katie

"Would you like a drink" asked Tom

"Yes, a cup of tea would be lovely" replied Matron

They left Matron to make the call

"There, must be more to this" whispered Katie

"I, think you are reading too much into this" replied Jonathon

"How, she was upstairs for a long time and now she is making the phone call" replied Katie

"I'm, with Jon you are reading way too much into it" replied Tom

"Come, on let's go and play football" replied Jonathon

"You go, I'll finish the drinks" replied Katie

"Listening into people's conversations" retorted Tom, for that he got a hit from Katie

"Come on, let's leave her to it" said Tom making his way out

Meanwhile Matron had finally gotten through to the royal

"Afternoon, Lizzie" said Matron

"Hello, Matron nice to hear from you, you'll never guess who turned up today out of the blue" replied Lizzie

"Look, Lizzie I don't have time for this, can you pass a message on to Jill or Gordon" replied Matron

"Hold, on one second" replied Lizzie

"Now I've told you already you have to wait there until the doctors say you can see them" said Lizzie to some patient's relatives

"Sorry, Matron what did you want" asked Lizzie

"Can you pass a message on to Jill or Gordon for me" said Matron again

"Hold on, I can't see them, but I can pass you over to sister, if you like" replied Lizzie

"No, just Jill or Gordon" replied Matron

Lizzie looked up from the phone to see Gordon walking down the corridor

"You're in luck Gordon's just coming" replied Lizzie

"Dr, phone for you" said Lizzie to Gordon, Gordon took the phone

"Hello" he said warily

"Ahh, Gordon" said Matron

"Matron, is everything alright, Ash?" asked Gordon, Jill had now joined him at the reception desk, and she had become slightly panicked the second he mentioned Ash

"Yes, she's fine, we all are, we just thought we would let you know, we came home, I think Ash was feeling a little tired" replied Matron

"Okay, well thank you, we shouldn't be that much longer" replied Gordon putting the phone down

"What's wrong" Jill asked Gordon

"Ash, was feeling tired so they have gone home, nothing to worry about" replied Gordon

Jill breathed a sigh of relief

"I told them we wouldn't be long, come on let's get this done and then we can see for ourselves" added Gordon

It was another hour before they had finally finished, Alan had given them a lift back to Gordon's car

Meanwhile the others had been outside playing football, Ash could hear them laughing and joking

"When, did they say they would be back" asked Katie

"I don't think they will be much longer now, why" asked Matron

"I, was just thinking about getting something ready for dinner, I mean they haven't eaten anything all day" replied Katie

"Neither has Ash, I might just go and check on her" replied Matron

Just then they heard Gordon's car pull up

"I would let Mum go" replied Tom

"Hello, everyone" said Gordon

"Mum, what's for tea" asked Tom

Jill looked to Gordon

"Fish and chips, Jonathon sort out what everyone wants, Katie sort out a drink for everyone" replied Gordon

"Matron, you will stay for dinner, won't you" asked Jill

"Well" started Matron

"That, settles it, I'm just going to check on Ash" said Jill

"Yes, I'll come with you" replied Gordon

They placed their bags in the hallway and then made their way upstairs

Ash, had given up on reading and had led on her bed, listening to her music, she heard people coming upstairs, she couldn't be bothered to move, so she closed her eyes and turned on her side hoping they would think she was a sleep


	93. Chapter 93

Jill and Gordon weren't fooled for one second

"Sweetheart" said Jill going over and sitting on the edge of the bed

"Mum" replied Ash turning to face them, now they knew why, she had been pretending, her face was still all blotchy from the crying

"Are, you alright" asked Gordon

"I'm fine, I guess it was just a shock" replied Ash

"Like we said, we will take it at your pace, now have you eaten anything" asked Jill

Ash shook her head

"Dad" shouted Jonathon from the bottom of the stairs

"Okay, I'll be there in a minute" replied Gordon

"What, can I get for you two" Gordon asked Jill and Ash

Ash, looked puzzled

"We're having fish and chips for tea" said Jill

"The usual for me" added Jill to Gordon

"I'm, not that hungry" replied Ash

"And the normal for this one as well" replied Jill, looking at Gordon who was just as worried as her

"Right, well, I'll go and get this, I'll be back soon" replied Gordon

"Sweetheart" was all Jill could say before Ash interrupted her

"I don't want to talk" said Ash

"Okay, well how about we wash your face and then you can help me get things ready" replied Jill

Ash was thinking about it, she looked at Jill and she could see how worried she was about her

She just nodded, and then went to get up

"I'll go on down, and see how the others are" said Jill

"Okay, I'll be down in a minute" replied Ash, going to the bathroom

Jill made her way downstairs and out into the garden

"Right, has everyone got a drink" asked Jill

"Yes, thank you, is Ash alright" asked Matron

"Yes, she's fine, she'll be down in a minute" replied Jill

Jill sat down and was talking to Matron, while the others played football

Ash was upstairs washing her face, she knew she had upset her mum when she didn't want to talk, but she just wasn't ready, she made her way downstairs, she saw Jill talking to Matron and felt like she didn't want to interrupt them, so she stayed inside and started to get the plates and cutlery ready

Jill caught movement out of the corner of her eye

"I'm Just going to" was all Jill had to say, before Matron nodded giving her approval

Jill made her way in, Ash looked up from what she was doing, she smiled at Jill

"I've got the plates out, what else do you think we'll need" asked Ash

"No, I think you have got everything, would you like a drink" replied Jill

"It's alright, I'll do it myself, do you want one" replied Ash, she turned and got herself a glass

"No, I've got one thank you" replied Jill

Ash started filling her glass with water from the tap

"Ash, sweetheart" started Jill, not quite sure how to put what she wanted to say

Ash looked at her mum and could tell she was finding this difficult, but before either of them could say anything, Gordon came through the front door

"I'm, back" he shouted as he made his way through, thinking they were still upstairs

"Ohh, sorry" said Gordon, he had the feeling he had walked into the middle of something, he looked at Jill, who looked away

"Right, come and get it" shouted Gordon

"What, was Matron having" Jill asked Gordon, while handing Ash a plate

"Don't worry about me, I can help myself, like everyone else" replied Matron

"Here, you go" said Ash, handing Matron the plate, Jill had just handed her

Jill, knew Ash was trying to put off eating with them, she didn't know what if anything had happened once they had left the royal, but something was clearly upsetting Ash

Once they had gotten their food they went outside, Ash had sat in between matron and Katie, but when Jill and Gordon came out they had different ideas

"Katie, can you sit here please" said Gordon

Katie did as she was asked, which meant Jill could now sit next to Ash, Ash rolled her eyes and once everyone was seated, Ash made to get up

"Sit down, and eat your food" said Gordon

"But, I thought I heard the door" replied Ash

"I, didn't hear anything, now sit down" replied Gordon

Ash did as she was told

Just then Sister popped her head around the corner

"Sorry, is now a bad time" said Sister

"No, there's some left if you want some" replied Jill, who looked at Ash afterwards to apologise but Ash was just looking down at her plate

"No, that's alright, I've already eaten, but I might just grab a glass of water if that's alright" replied Sister

"Yes, that's fine, just help yourself" replied Jill

Gordon waited until sister had gone inside

"I'm sorry Ash, I didn't mean to snap" replied Gordon

"It's fine" replied Ash, but she wasn't fooling Jill

There wasn't time to talk anymore as sister reappeared from the kitchen

Jonathon got up

"Here, you go sister, you can have my seat" he said

"Thank you, Jonathon," replied Sister taking the seat

Ash, was grateful at least there was the table between her and sister

Jonathon grabbed another chair

"Budge up Ash" said Jonathon, deciding to sit next to Ash,

Ash, moved closer to Jill, so Jonathon could squeeze in

"You, haven't eaten much, can I have some" said Jonathon

Ash, nodded

"No, there's more inside if you want some, Ash has to eat all of hers" said Gordon

Jonathon got up

"Don't worry, I'll help you out when they're not looking" he whispered as he went passed

"So, what can we do for you" asked Jill, wanting to get this over and done with

"I, came to see you Ash" replied Sister

"Why, bother" muttered Ash

Luckily the only person that heard her was Jill, when no-one had said anything Sister continued, thinking that Ash, was happy to see her and willing to listen

"I, wish you had been there, there was a lot you could have learnt" started sister

"I don't care, the only thing I want to know is why" replied Ash

Sister, didn't listen and carried on talking

"I'll be helping out again in a few weeks, you could come with me" said Sister

"No" replied Ash

"Don't answer yet, wait until, I tell you all that you will learn" replied Sister

"I, will never, ever go with you" replied Ash, getting upset

Jill and Gordon could tell Ash was never going to get the answers that she wanted

"I think Ash, is trying to understand why you still went" said Gordon to Sister

"Well, it's not that simple, I had made commitments" started Sister

"That's, not good enough, I want the truth" replied Ash

"This is down to you, isn't it" said Sister looking at Jill

"No, this has nothing to do with them, I need to know" replied Ash

"Well, it's complicated" started Sister

"Try" replied Ash

"Yeah, you owe her that much" added Tom

"Yeah, we would all like to know" said Katie

"Well, I had made a commitment and I couldn't let them down" started Sister

"What, you could not have even stayed one night" asked Ash

"No, the trains, and knowing you were never going to come" replied Sister

"Don't turn this on Ash" said Jonathon jumping to her defence

"It's fine, but now you have to understand where I am coming from" said Ash

Sister went to say something, but Ash got in there first

"I, never want to see you again, you made your choice now I have made mine, I no longer want you in my life" said Ash

"Ash, are you sure about this" said Gordon

"Yes, I'm fed up of being let down and being expected to drop everything because that's what she wants" replied Ash, calmly

"Well, then you heard her, please leave us to finish our family dinner" said Gordon

"I, bet this is all your doing" said Sister to Jill

"No, it is not, in fact I'm so sorry mum, dad, for all the fights we had, when you forced me to go and see her" said Ash

"It's fine really, we knew it was hard watching the others do what they wanted, and we hated forcing you to go" replied Jill, squeezing Ash's hand

"I, will not let this happen, I will not let you take her from me" said Sister

"Come, now sister, you have to respect Ash's decision" said Matron

"Never" replied Sister getting up and storming off

They watched her leave and then turned to face Ash, Ash was a little embarrassed and looked down at her plate

"Way, to go Ash" said Katie, impressed Ash had it in her

"Yeah, you really showed her" added Tom

But before anyone else could say anything sister came back to the table

"Jill, Gordon, we need to talk" said Sister

"Okay" said Jill, motioning for her to sit down

"In, private" replied Sister

"No, whatever you have to say, you can say in front of us" replied Ash stubbornly

"Kid's, go inside please" said Gordon

"No, not if she's going to blame you, for what I have done" replied Ash

"Ash, sweetheart, it's fine, go inside please" replied Jill

"Fine I'll go but the others stay" replied Ash

"No, all of you have to go" said Sister

"As, if we would do what you tell us to, this is our house" replied Tom

"Can, Matron stay" asked Ash

"Yes" replied Gordon

"Okay, but if you so much as blame mum or dad then there, really is no coming back" replied Ash, getting up and taking her plate inside

The others followed reluctantly, carrying the other now empty plates


	94. Chapter 94

Outside with the adults

"You, cannot let her do this, this is not part of the agreement" said Sister, being careful not to place the blame on anyone

"I'm afraid it's Ash's decision, and as she is old enough we can no longer force her" replied Gordon

"Well, I will be taking her with me" replied Sister

"Don't, you think that is a little extreme" replied Matron

"No, well, we'll see what my parents have to say about it, now may I use your phone" replied Sister getting up and going towards the door, before anyone could reply

"Of, course be my guest" replied Jill a little sarcastically, also getting up and following Sister

The kids who were sat at the kitchen table, could all see Sister coming towards them

"Pack a bag, you're coming with me" barked Sister

"Never, you cannot tell me what to do any more" replied Ash

"You, stupid, stupid girl, don't make this any harder than it has to be" replied Sister

"Don't, you ever say that to my daughter" said Jill, who had just reached the door and was disgusted by what she had just heard

"Ash, come here, now I want you to go outside with Dad and Matron" added Jill

Ash went towards Jill

"I'm, not leaving you alone" whispered Ash

"It's going to be fine, right Tom, Katie can you make us some drinks, so we can have some of that lovely cake" said Jill, so Ash, would know the others would be there

"Yeah, of course, I can't wait for the cake it looks so good" replied Katie

"Okay, Ash, let's see what Dad and Matron want to drink" said Jonathon, coaxing her outside

"But, I haven't finished my" was all Ash could say

"Don't, worry, you've had more than we thought you would anyway, sweetheart" said Jill

While all this was going on Sister had gone onto the phone and was already speaking to her father

"Daddy" said Sister

"Aisling, what's wrong" asked Niall

"Daddy, back me up, they have broken the agreement, Aisling, has to come and stay with me, it's for the best" replied Sister

"Aisling, you are making no sense start from the beginning" replied Niall

"Daddy, she cannot do this to me" replied Sister sobbing

"Where, are you" asked Niall

"I'm at Gordon's" replied Sister between sobs

"Right, well now what's happened" asked Niall, trying to calm the situation down

"She, doesn't want to see me, it's all down to them it has to be" replied Sister

"Now, that's not true, put one of them on the phone" replied Niall, knowing he wasn't going to get anywhere with Aisling

"They're trying to blame me for everything" replied Sister

"Okay, I will sort this, can I speak to one of them please" replied Niall

Sister handed the phone over to Jill, who had been listening in

"He, wants to speak to you" said Sister handing the phone over

"Hello" said Jill

"Hello, Jill, what's this all about Aisling is making no sense" replied Niall

"Well it all started a while ago" started Jill, telling Niall the whole story

Niall kept quiet the whole time even when Jill told him the reason Ash ran away, or about how Ash was feeling about being second best

"Okay, well that is a lot to take in, I need to speak to both of them" replied Niall

"Who, would you like to speak to first" asked Jill

"I think Ash" replied Niall

"Okay, I'll just get her" replied Jill

"Katie, sweetheart, can you get Ash for me" said Jill, Katie nodded then went outside

"So how are you both" asked Jill

"We're fine, some days are easier than others" replied Niall

"Ash, Grandad would like a word" said Jill to Ash

"Hello, Grandad, how are you and Nan" asked Ash

"Hello, little one, I'm grand, and Nans fine, she sends her love, how are you" replied Niall

"I'm getting there, she didn't take the news very well" replied Ash

"Well, now she never didn't like things she couldn't control" replied Niall

"I understand, what you have been through, but do you think you could give her one more chance" replied Niall

"All, I've given her is chances" replied Ash

"Just, one more chance, now she knows what she will lose, for me" pleaded Niall

"Okay, but if she so much as says the wrong thing, or doesn't keep her promise, then that is it no more chances" replied Ash

"You, are a good girl, can I speak to your mum please" asked Niall

"Yes, see you later" replied Ash

"Mum, Grandad would like a word" said Ash to Jill, who had been lingering in the hallway, she didn't want to see Ash upset any more today, if she could help it

"Okay" replied Jill taking the receiver from Ash

"I've got Ash, to give her one more chance, but it's not going to easy, after all you have just told me" said Niall

"Okay, well you know we would do whatever is best for Ash" replied Jill

"Yes, we know you have always done the very best for her and we are very grateful, you have given her more than we ever could" replied Niall

"But now, I must speak to Aisling" added Niall

"Well, take care and you know where we are if you need anything" replied Jill, who handed the phone back to Sister, who had just come back into the hallway after being told by Ash, he needed to speak to her now

"Daddy" said Sister

"Aisling, you have not made this very easy, have you" started Niall

"No, daddy, it's not my fault" interrupted Sister

"No, now you listen to me, you have been very lucky this time, I have spoken to Ash and she will give you one last chance" replied Niall

"Ohhh, thank you daddy" replied Sister

"Don't, thank me, you need to change and quickly, from what I've been told" replied Niall

They were on the phone for another twenty minutes talking

Meanwhile the others were outside laughing and joking, Ash was still a little on edge and kept glancing at the kitchen

Back in the hallway with sister

"You've remembered all we've talked about" said Niall

"Yes, daddy" replied Sister

"I, mean it Aisling" replied Niall

"Yes, daddy, take care speak to you soon" replied Sister

"Bye, Aisling, take care" replied Niall putting the phone down

Sister stood there for a second, she knew her dad would sort it all out, she then went outside, where the others were all sat talking and laughing around the table, she felt like an outsider looking in. Ohh how she wished that was her with Gordon and the kids, she made her way over, none of them looked up at her

"Well, I had better be going" said Sister

"Bye" said Ash through gritted teeth

"Bye, see you tomorrow" said Jill

"Yes, see you at work" replied Sister and with that she was off, thinking she had won the fight and that she was right all along

Back at the table

"So, where's this cake we were promised" said Gordon

"It's inside, I'll just go and get it, does everyone need a top up" said Jill

Everyone nodded

"Ash, could you give me a hand please" asked Jill

"Okay" replied Ash getting up and following Jill inside

"Right, Ash can you get the plates and forks out, ohh and the knife to cut the cake" asked Jill as she started to fill the kettle

"Yes" replied Ash

"Mum, I'm sorry" started Ash, before she started to cry

"Hey, this is not your fault, so we will have none of this" said Jill

Meanwhile outside

"Dad, I think Mum may need a hand" said Jonathon, seeing Ash crying

Gordon looked over

"Yes, I think you may be right, I just go and speed things up" replied Gordon as he made his way in


	95. Chapter 95

"Is everything alright" asked Gordon as he made his way in

Ash nodded

"I'll just start taking these out" said Ash, wiping her eyes and picking the plates and cutlery and making her way out

"Jill, what's going on" asked Gordon

"To, tell you the truth Gordon, I know as much as you, I just wish she would talk to me" replied Jill, frustrated, she turned and filled up the coffee pot before refilling the kettle

"She will, did you know she was going to say that to sister" asked Gordon

"I, knew she was upset with her, I think that was what she wanted to talk to us about before, but then things got in the way, and she thought it wasn't important enough to bother us about, and that she had time" replied Jill, close to tears

"Jill" was all Gordon could say before, Jill interrupted him

"I, let our baby girl down" said Jill, not realising Ash, had come back in for the cake

"No" said Ash before turning back around and going back to the others

"Ash" called Jill, but Ash didn't stop

"Jonathon, could you go and get the cake, I'm struggling with it" said Ash, pointing to her cast

"Yeah, of course" replied Jonathon going in

By this time Jill had filled the teapot, and between them were trying to balance everything

"Just in time, you can take this" said Gordon passing Jonathon the cake

"Okay, is every thing alright" asked Jonathon

"Yes, it's fine let's go and have this" replied Gordon

They made their way outside, the kids had all moved chairs Ash had sat between Tom and Katie, Katie was sat next to Matron, Jonathon sat next to Tom, which left two empty chairs next to each other, someone had already removed the chair that had been occupied by sister

Gordon and Jill took their chairs, Jill was now sat next to Matron.

Jill looked at Ash who was staring at a spot on the table, doing her best to control her anger

"Right, who want's some cake" asked Gordon

They all replied yes please, so Gordon got cutting

"This looks really, good" he said, while handing out the plates

"Thanks" mumbled Ash as she was handed hers

They were sat in an awkward silence until Katie finally broke the silence

"So, I need to go into town tomorrow, anyone want to come with me" said Katie

"Sorry, Katie I have to work, another time though" replied Jill

"So, do I" added Gordon

"Tom, Jonathon" asked Katie

"No chance, we are not spending the day shopping" replied Tom

"Anyway, we are meeting the guys in the afternoon" added Jonathon

"Ash" asked Katie

Ash had not forgotten what Katie had said in the car earlier today and was hoping Jill or Gordon would say something to get her out of it, but when they didn't

"Sorry, already got plans" lied Ash

Katie could see that Jill and Gordon looked shocked at Ash's statement

"Really, what" asked Katie

"Just, stuff, you're not the only one with friends" replied Ash

"Yeah, sorry Ash I didn't mean it to sound like that" replied Katie

It worried Jill that Ash was being so secretive, it wasn't like her to keep things from her, she could understand Ash not telling everyone else, but why didn't she know that Ash had plans.

"Dad, can I have some more cake please" asked Jonathon

"Yeah, can I have some as well" asked Tom

"Of course, anyone else" replied Gordon

"No, thanks I had better be going soon" replied Matron

Jill looked at her watch

"My, goodness is that the time, I'll give you a lift home, whenever you're ready" replied Jill

"Mum, can we get a lift" asked Katie

"Yes, as long, as you are ready, when matron is" replied Jill

"Can you wait five minutes" asked Katie

"You'll have to ask Matron" replied Gordon

"Yes, that's fine, take your time" added Matron

"Thanks" replied Katie getting up and running inside

"Five minutes" shouted Gordon after her

"So, where are you going tonight" asked Gordon

"We're just meeting up and seeing what happens after that" replied Tom

"Well, stay safe and stick together" said Jill

"Yes, mum" replied Tom

"Well not too late tonight" replied Jill

"Of, course not" replied Jonathon

"Well, I had better make a start on the washing up" said Jill

"No, Ash and I can do that while you take the others, can't we" replied Gordon

Ash nodded, she knew she was going to get a talking to and that there was no way out of it

"Right, let's get going" said Jill, seeing Katie in the kitchen

"Bye, Matron see you soon" said Ash getting up and taking a pile of plates into the kitchen

"Bye, Ash" replied Matron

"Bye, Matron thank you" said Gordon

"Bye, don't forget just be there for her to talk to" replied Matron parting her words of wisdom before she left

They left Gordon collecting the rest of the things before joining Ash in the kitchen

Ash had already started filling the sink when Gordon entered the kitchen

"Right, I'll wash up" said Gordon

"Okay" said Ash moving out the way and picking the tea towel up

"Ash" said Gordon, ohh God here comes the lecture thought Ash

"Yes, dad" replied Ash

"Your, mum and I are worried about you" started Gordon

"Don't be I'm fine, really" replied Ash

"Look, you know we are here whenever you want to talk, I know sometimes It may not seem like it" carried on Gordon

"I, know, but somethings I have to do for myself" replied Ash

"Okay, but just don't shut us out completely" replied Gordon

"You should be so lucky" joked Ash

"Now, that's sorted what have you got planned for tomorrow" asked Gordon

"Nothing" replied Ash

"Ash, you know the agreement we have, we have to know where, when and who you are with" said Gordon sternly

"I know, I'm not going anywhere, I made it up cause, I didn't want to go, and I didn't want all the questions" replied Ash

Gordon could tell she was telling the truth

"So, can I ask why, you don't want to go" asked Gordon

"Let's just say it was, something that was said, and now I know mum was right" replied Ash

"She is about most things, just don't tell her" replied Gordon, just as Jill came through the door

"Don't tell who, what" asked Jill

Ash giggled

"Nothing, we're nearly finished here, why don't you sit down with a drink and make the most of the peace and quiet" replied Gordon

"It's, still fairly early, do you fancy playing a game" asked Jill

"Okay, but nothing to taxing" replied Gordon

"Ash, will you join us" asked Jill

"Yeah, okay, what do you want to play" asked Ash

"Monopoly" replied Gordon, getting in there before Jill had a chance

"Right, monopoly it is, drinks?" asked Jill

"Tea, please" said Ash

"Tea's good" added Gordon

"Tea, all round then, well aren't you going to set the game up then" said Jill to Ash

"Okay, I'm going" replied Ash handing Gordon the tea towel

"Thanks' sweetheart" said Gordon

Once Ash had left them

"It's alright there is nothing to worry about, she's not going anywhere tomorrow, and I think she will talk to us in time" said Gordon

"So, why did she say she was" replied Jill, pouring the tea

"She, didn't say much just something was said, and maybe you were right" replied Gordon

"Right, let's go and enjoy the evening" replied Jill, feeling better

"Yes, she's a good kid, Matron was right we just have to be ready to listen when she's ready to talk" replied Gordon


End file.
